It’s not often that one visits a grave with a water can and a bottle of champagne.

It’s not often that one visits said grave whilst wearing a green felt cap with a feather in it.

It’s also not often that one leaves and never comes back. 

Because you only get to do that once.

And you took that chance.

I never saw it coming. No one saw it coming. Did you see it coming? Because that day I remember seventeen year old you wearing that stupid green cap and swinging your stupid wooden sword.
“Forget them, Wendy. Forget them all. Come with me where you'll never, never have to worry about grown up things again.”
I hated your stupid acting but now it’s my fondest memory and you haunt my dreams. In a good way, don’t worry.
Okay maybe I didn’t hate it. I mean this did happen:
“Peter... I should like to give you a kiss.” And then with the same foolish grin you always wore you stretch your hand out.
I play along, of course, as I always do (let it be known that it was because I liked you, not the part of Wendy) “Don’t you know what a kiss is?”
“I shall know when you give me one.”

I hope you still know now, now that you returned to Neverland.

What a strange way to Neverland, to sit in a running car with the windows up and a pipe leading from the exhaust to a small gap in the window next to you. But I guess that did make you happy, because your eyes were closed and you had your stupid green hat and stupid wooden sword and stupid foolish grin. 

You left with your stupid foolish grin and I can never have it back.

I sit here on the grass and water the sprouts that grow on the soil of your grave. It’s quite morbid, but I think you would have liked the fact that you were doing something for Mother Nature. 

You are being reborn into the beautiful again, in the form of Roses of Sharon. Will they keep growing even when I’m gone?

Like you, even the most beautiful flowers fade away.

I hope you appreciate this, from wherever you are, because carrying all this stuff from my place and onto the bus is very awkward and even more so when people see me get off at the cemetery. I mean come on, what else would I bring? Tears and roses? I have no more tears to cry, and you never liked roses anyway, you always said they were not to be trusted, because truly beautiful things would never hurt anyone.

Were you truly beautiful? I suppose so. It wasn’t you that caused the pain, but rather your absence.

Your mother cried so much. Your father was silent for days. 

It was hard to fill in the hole that you left.

But we did eventually, with the memories of you.

Champagne. 

I almost forgot about that. I’m sorry you can’t have any, but who decided that they would never grow up?

I don’t know why you chose to go to Neverland so soon.

Do the mermaids drown you sweetly if you go too close?

How many pirates have you fought?

What's it like to be forever young?

I’ll assume you are somewhere beyond the star light of the thick sky.

I miss you. I miss you plenty. I can’t wait to hold your hand again, to laugh with you and to be your Wendy again.

But don’t come and get me just yet. As much as I want to know what it’s like and to be with you, I shall wait for my time. Come for me then.

“Sunny, you’re not a child anymore.”
“That’s Peter Pan to you, Kim Taeyeon—I mean, Wendy Darling.”
“Oh just shut up and kiss me, Peter.”
“Yes Ma’am!”