With a heavy heart, I kept on watching her back until I can no longer see her. I took a deep breath and let out slowly. This heavy feeling is eating me up. Was I never enough for her? Did I do anything wrong? I wanted to win her back but what if she doesn't need me at all. With a last look at the route she took, I turn my back at it and head home. 

 

After a few days...

 

"Yah! Wake up!" a voice shouted.

 

"Oof!" I woke up right away to the heavy pressure on my stomach. "I'm awake I'm awake!!!" I yelled when Doojoon was preparing for another pillow whack on me.

 

"You look horrible" Dongwon commented after scanning his hyung's face.

 

"Nice to see you too," I grumbled, feeling intruded and annoyed, I reluctantly stood up and went to wash my face.

 

"So, what's with the intrusion on my off day?" I asked even though I know they were here for one particular reason.

 

The members looked at each other and Yoseob replied to me ," Well, we know you had some tough break and we discussed that we have to get you back on track".

 

My chest clenched at the sudden vision of her back in my mind. Without any word, I head to the kitchen and poured myself a cup of water. 

 

"We don't want to remind you of her but we all see that you are bothered by it," Gikwang said with a concerned expression along with the others, well except Hyunseung who , as always, looked deep in thought.

 

I looked at them, wondering if they know what I lack in, I gulped down my water.

 

"Do you guys even know why she left me?" I broke the silence after I finished drinking.

 

"Of course we do, she told us," Doojoon stated it like it was obvious.

 

I stood in front of them in surprised and disbelief.

 

Dongwon noticed my expression and quickly added ,"She contacted us to ask us to take care of you after she left."

 

"What was the reason she left me?" althought she left me already , I still didn't know why.

 

Hyunseung finally spoke for the first time. "She was too overwhelmed. She felt that she could not catch up to you. I guess you can say that she felt too insecure about her lack of aspects."

 

I stood frozen.

 

"You may not have noticed but she always look behind her whenever she is with you," Gikwang.commented.

 

"But that is ridiculous," I blankly stated.

 

"Not to her it seems. She confessed to us that she didnt felt like she deserve you and well..she took it seriously," said Yoseob.

 

Doojoon must have sense what I was about to do and quickly stopped me from leaving to find her.

 

"Let me go! I have to find her!" I yelled in frustration. 

 

"Stop it Junhyung!" Doojoon restraint me and the others joined him.

 

After they settled me down on the sofa, Gikwang and Yoseob on my sides restraining me from leaving while Doojoon stood in front of me.

 

"Look it may be difficult for you to deal with the loss but she specifically asked for our help.  She doesn't want to contact us anymore since she said she is going to change her phone number and her address." 

 

I stared at him in disbelief. 

 

"Don't you see? She just want you to be who you are and she doesn't want to drag you down," said Dongwon with a heavy sigh.

 

I just sat there in silence. I thought I was never enough for her or that I did something wrong but all the while she was feeling that she didnt deserve me? she left me because of that? I felt my anger turned into guilt.  Was that the reason, I questioned myself.

 

As my members left me in my solitary, I remembered her last words before she turned her back on me.

 

She sofly said, "Take care, there will be someone worthy to care for you in the future."

 

For the first time after she left me, I cried.