It was another solemn day. Another day you planned to spend only with yourself…Living off these types of days was tedious, as well as quiet depressing but you tried to suppress those types of thoughts to the back of your mind. You didn’t have many friends; your family was rarely there for you when you had something to say or had something you wanted to do.

          You decided to take a walk that morning and get some fresh air. Just because you had no one to spend the day with didn’t mean you should be cooped up inside all day, right? A few blocks from your home was a pond you frequented whenever you felt like getting out. Before leaving the house, you searched the kitchen cupboards for some old bread that you could feed the geese that morning. Here it is…You held the bag of crusted white bread before your eyes and took off out the door. “I’ll be back…..” You stopped yourself when you realized there was no one to listen and slowly shut the door.

          With your mind silent, you trudged quietly down the sidewalk with your package of old bread. Every few minutes or so you would pass by another stranger  who paid no mind to you, only focusing on their task at hand or the company beside them. If it wasn’t for the fact that you had gone this way so many times in the past, you probably would have had a hard time finding the pond as the morning fog rolled in and hazed your view. You sniffled a few times, realizing you had forgotten your scarf but at the same time you felt too numb to care. The pond was now in sight; you made your way towards the desolate wooden benches and sat down before untying your bag. The geese ignored you until you tossed a stale scrap onto the cement and they came waddling to your feet. Though they only seemed to care about the free food, it was nice to pretend that you felt wanted somewhere. You scoped the view from your seat and stared off into the cloud of mist in front of you as you sprinkled crumbs onto the floor. You sighed quietly and closed your eyes, breathing in the cold air around your face. When you opened them you noticed a tall silhouette in the distance and you focused your gaze on the geese. Through your peripheral vision, you noticed the silhouette was a young man…and he was walking towards you.

“Good morning!” The man took a seat next to you and pulled out a water bottle from his bag. He unscrewed the cap and took a gulp before placing it between his knees and taking a deep breath. “It’s cold this morning, but I’m so hot!” he laughed. “I just went for a run, ah almost 3 kms so far! I’m so tired, so how are you?” He continued, oblivious to your efforts to ignore him. Not out of annoyance, but just out of discomfort. You’ve never started a conversation with a stranger before, or held one for that matter. After a few moments, you realized that not responding would only make the situation awkward and turned to the stranger.

“I-I’m good…how are you?” You didn’t realize that you were basically whispering, you didn’t speak much but you had a very quiet voice when you did. This stranger was the total opposite of you, though. His voice was loud and full of vigor, for a minute you even envied his confident presence. If only you were as outgoing as this stranger.

“Good, good! I hope I’m not bothering you!” He chuckled again and extended his arm in front of you. “My name is Soohyun, how about you?” You crinkled the bag of bread in your lap and looked at him. He bared a wide grin as you lifted your hand to shake his.

“My name is _____.” You smiled slightly and felt your face getting warm. He shook your hand gently before letting go and continuing the conversation.

“Nice to meet you, did you come to feed the geese?” He eyed your bag of bread and you looked down at your lap.

“Ah…yeah…” You felt a bit embarrassed to be seen as the girl who came to the pond alone to feed geese.

“Can I try?” Soohyun lifted his arm in front of you and opened his palm. You reached inside your bag and placed a portion onto his hand. A tender smile formed on his face as he tossed the bread into the pond. The flock followed and began to quarrel over it. “I used to always feed the geese here as a child.” He recalled the nostalgic memories as he continued to smile to himself.

“Do you live around here?” You had never seen this stranger come by and you did come here often after all.

“Well, I used to. I’ve been busy so I don’t get to visit my hometown often…” His smile drooped as he turned to you. “It’s always nice to come back though…”

“I know what you mean…even though I never left…and…I come here a lot…” You were getting your words twisted and decided to just stop talking, but Soohyun waited for you to continue. “I …usually come here when I feel…alone...” you concluded.

“So you come here when you’re alone and you come here often? Does that mean you feel alone often?” He tilted his head to one side and you could tell his face was full of pity. You didn’t like it when people looked at you like that….You sighed and nodded, Soohyun was just a stranger after all. There’s no point in lying to a stranger you knew you’d never see again. You reached into your bag again to break the silence and threw another scrap into the pond. The bag was now empty. That was the last piece… You molded the bag into a tight ball and stood up to go throw it into the trash. A hesitant hand held onto your arm as you were about to turn away. “Do you want to go get some coffee?” Your eyes widened as you were shocked by the question. Coffee? With a stranger? Wouldn’t it be dangerous if I said yes….You stood for a few seconds and thought to yourself as your jaw unhinged.   But then again…would anyone even care if I disappeared…. You placed your hand over his and smiled sweetly, having made up your mind.

“Right now?”

“Since I’m all sweaty,” He chuckled. “How about in an hour? At the café on 4th? That’s 9am.” He loosened his grip on your arm but your hand kept his in place. You nodded in agreement.

“I’ll be there, 1 hour…see you soon.” You let your arm drop to your side and watched as Soohyun lifted himself off the bench.

“See you soon….don’t be late!” You waved at him as he jogged away and couldn’t help but smile to yourself. I shouldn’t be like this...this could end up bad… But you ignored your conscience as you raced home.

You entered silently and ran to your room to get your scarf and wallet. Just as you had predicted, no one had even noticed you were gone. Your mother was in the kitchen on the phone while your father was yelling at the television set in the living room. You had wanted to move out for a few months now, but decided that being ignored and treated like a ghost was better than living in absolute silence. You still had some time so for the first time in a long time, you searched for your makeup bag. It was under your bed for some reason, once you had found it you rushed to the bathroom and applied the eyeliner with your shaky hands. You found yourself getting frustrated damn it. Now I remember why I never wore this stuff… You took a freshly doused ball of cotton and pressed it over your eye before attempting to draw on the liner again with more patience. After 20 minutes, you were finally finished. You had almost forgotten how you looked with makeup on since it had been a while but you were satisfied as you stared at the woman in the mirror. I look pretty… You thought to yourself, you rarely felt this way about yourself but it felt nice. You placed your makeup back into the bag and made your way back to your room. You hadn’t even noticed the time, it was already a quarter to 8 and you said you would be at the café by 9. You put your coat back on and stuffed your wallet into your purse as you walked towards the front door. For a second, you stopped before reaching out for the knob. Perhaps you were hoping that your mother or father would ask you where you’re going, or why you have makeup on, but no one said a thing. You turned the knob and went out the door. Your boots clacked onto the cement below your feet as you walked towards the café. The watch on your wrist read 8:50. You quickened your pace, though you knew you would be able to get there in time you were feeling anxious. What if Soohyun’s already waiting… You walked faster, almost jogging down the street before you arrived at the café. A few businessmen and women were in line inside, while the tables outside were deserted.  He’s not here yet. You glanced at your watch again. Three minutes to 9. You decided to take a seat at one of the empty tables and set your bag in front of you. Your eyes were glued to your watch as you tapped your foot involuntarily. He probably isn’t coming… You gave yourself a pitiful smile but on the inside you knew how disappointed you would be if he really didn’t show up. Still, you waited patiently at the empty table. Five past nine. You sighed, but still remained seated with your elbows on the table. You felt something creeping up your back and jumped, expecting it to be a coach roach or some sort of spider.

“How long have you been waiting here? I’ve been inside for 15 minutes!” Soohyun handed you a hot drink and took the seat next you. “Do you prefer it out here? I know some people like it better outside.” He took a sip and placed his cup onto the table.

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t know you were waiting inside…I’ve only been here a few minutes…” Part of you was embarrassed that you hadn’t thought to look inside, but it was just a habit of yours to avoid groups of people. The other part of you was relieved to know you weren’t stood up. You stared at the warm cup of coffee Soohyun had bought for you as you let out a quiet sigh of relief.

“It’s fine, I already got you a drink if that’s okay. It’s the same as mine, try it!” He ushered you to take a sip, a bit strong for your taste but you didn’t mind.

“Oh. Thank you…and if you want to go inside we can.” You smiled at him and he let out a light giggle. You wondered if it would be right to pay him back for the drink, so you fished into your purse for your wallet and handed him a five dollar bill. Though it was probably over compensating, you placed it on the table and slid it towards him.

“What’s this? You’re paying me for something?” He laughed again and rejected the bill. “I asked you to come here; I’ll pay for your drink alright?” He put one hand on your shoulder which would usually make you feel uncomfortable but there was something very charming about Soohyun. Every action he made felt so genuine and so sincere.  You still had worries in the back of your mind about how you might be getting yourself into a sticky situation but you paid no mind to them. 

“Oh…Okay, thank you again.” You took another sip of the bitter brew to show your appreciation. You almost felt bad for accepting the free cup, but at the same time you had convinced yourself. No man’s ever offered to pay for me before. Shouldn’t I enjoy it? The feeling of getting treated? I shouldn’t feel guilty about it. I have no reason to feel bad.

Perhaps it was the feeling of having someone interested in you, even if it was only out of pity, or the fact that you were wearing makeup that gave you a sudden boost of confidence. At that moment you said something without thinking, without concern for possible rejection or fear.  “Soohyun…do you like me? Is that why you asked me here?” You looked into his dark brown eyes and awaited a response. A gentle smirk lit up Soohyun’s face as he reached for your free hand.

“I would have never expected you to be so straight forward.” He paused for a moment. “Honestly, I do like you even though we just met.”

“Really?” Your voice was louder than usual. “You didn’t just ask me here because you felt bad for me, did you?” You were hoping for him to deny it.

“I’ll be truthful with you,” Soohyun looked down at his cup. “I did…a little bit….but I still like you. Okay?” He took his hand and rubbed his forehead, you could see his cheeks were flushed pink but you weren’t sure if it was from the cold or because of you. “You might think I seem like the type to start a random conversation with anyone I see, right?” He continued. “It’s not true…I don’t do that often. But something about you caught my attention this morning.” You were skeptical but you couldn’t deny the sincerity in his words. Even if he was lying, it was all to bring you a bit of joy wasn’t it?

“I don’t know if that’s true but…Soohyun are you busy today?” It felt strange being so demanding and straight forward, it wasn’t like you but you maintained the small boost of confidence you had felt earlier. Soohyun tilted his head and the barely noticeable stubble on his chin.

“I guess I’m not busy. You want to do something?” Soohyun grinned as he patted your hand. “I’ll take you wherever you want.” He beamed cheerfully. You thought about it for a moment. Wherever I want? What if I just want to spend time with you…

“I just want to spend some more time with you…” You said shyly. Soohyun reached out and laid his hand gently on your cheek. His hands are so warm… You pressed his hand against your skin with yours as you had done similarly before.

“We can spend time together.” He assured you with a gentle chuckle. You closed your eyes and let out a warm breath.

“How about…we take a walk…?” You felt like just wandering aimlessly, with nowhere in particular as your destination.

“Sure!” Soohyun scooted closer to you and leaned down to kiss the back of your hand. “Whenever you’re ready to go, I am.” You smiled and glanced down at his hands which were holding yours. His fingers were thick and full of warmth, while yours were thin and unusually cold.  You’re like my opposite. You giggled to yourself. “Is something funny?” Soohyun teased.

“I think you and I….are like opposites.” You admitted. He seemed interested in what you had to say.

“Oh really? We’re opposites?” He questioned.

“You’re so loud and outgoing; I’m the opposite of that. You’re so full of warmth and life, while I always feel cold and numb. Your fingers are thick, mine are thin…” You explained but ended up feeling ridiculous. His fingers thick, mine thin? You giggled again to yourself feeling a bit stupid for making that comparison in particular. 

“I guess I see what you mean, maybe a bit.” He imitated your almost silent giggle as he rubbed your fingers together. “Are you cold right now? Should I warm you up?” Without even waiting for a response, Soohyun leaned his face closer to yours and kissed you lightly on the cheek. His soft lips made your skin tingle with warmth, it was a feeling you hadn’t felt before or at least you couldn’t remember the last time you felt this way. A dozen butterflies somehow made their way into your stomach as your heart fluttered. “Do you feel warmer now?” He whispered as he pulled away.

All you could do was nod as the blood quickly rushed to your face. He tucked a tuft of hair behind your ear as you stared into his deep chocolate eyes, hypnotized by them. What should I say? Or…What should I do? You were frozen.

“Sorry… was that too sudden?” He apologized but there was no regret in his words. You took another sip of your coffee and shook your head.

“Do you want to go now?” You dragged your purse into your lap, ready to stand up. Soohyun nodded and got up out of his seat before pushing his chair into the table.

“Let’s go then!” He picked up both coffee cups and handed you one. You thanked him as you stood up next to him and pushed your chair in. Soohyun turned towards you and put his arm out for you to grab. You obliged timidly as you held on gently and began walking with him in the opposite direction you came from.