Length: 3,397

 

"Don't you understand? You mean more to me than anything in this whole world" he had said when she asked him what she meant to him. But nothing ever stays the same, things change and so does his priorities. She will forever be his tinker bell and never his Wendy. 

    They've know each other forever, from the very first day Sammii decided to share her crayons with Changmin back in kindergarten because apples can't be green. The grew up together and for a long time it was always Changmin and Sammii, Sammii and Changmin. Everything they did, they did together. Everywhere they went, they went together. They shared all their secrets and never did being a girl or boy stop them from anything. That is until they both went through puberty and bath time between the two were inappropriate and boys and girls didn't have cooties anymore. He grew and so did she, girls became more important to him and she began to find friends her own gender because somethings are better telling other girls than him, like how she has always been in love with her best friend.       "Victoria said yes!! She agreed to go out with me!!" Changmin exclaimed, bursting into her room. Sammii looks up from doing her homework to look at her best friend, a small smile adorning her face. "S-She did?" He nods eagerly "I asked her after school and she said yes! You're the first person I've told! I am so happy! Aren't happy for me??"    She forces herself to smile and not cry, like all the other time he has excitedly told her he likes a girl or has gotten himself a girlfriend. "Congratulations, you've been watching her for a while, but was too much of a loser to actually ask her out." He gives her a glare before plopping down onto her bed "I really like her, Sammii. She's not the same as the other girls, I really want us to last." Turning back to her work, she holds back the tears threatening to spill "I am sure you'll last" she quietly says and he hums a reply.    "I can't wait until this Saturday. We're going on our first date! I am going to make sure it's the best first date she'll ever have!" He continues to talk about his date and girlfriend, while the latter breaks a bit every time she hears him talk about his new lover.    When he leaves to go meet up with his new girlfriend, she curls up in her bed and cries. Once again he fails recognize the longing in her eyes.        Sammii's entire world crashes and what's left of her broken heart falls apart when Changmin come into her office one evening to tell her an important decision he has made. "I am going to propose to Victoria" Changmin exclaimed happily the moment he runs into Sammii's office, his face holding the biggest smile she has ever seen on his face. Sammii doesn't have a reaction to the news because she doesn't know whether she should be happy that the man she loves is happy with another women or whether she should cry because the man she loves is happy with another women.   "I've decided. Victoria is the one. She has to be. We've been together for years. She makes me smile, and is able to bring light into my life when I feel like life isn't worth it. I am always happy around her and I… I love her! I can't imagine spending the rest of my life with anyone else but her!"    clogs up and she knows the tears aren't far behind, but still she stands up and puts on the happiest smile she can manage. "Congratulations, I knew you two were going to last" she says. "Thank you so much! It makes the news a thousand times much more better with your blessings" he throws his arms around her. She returns the hug and faintly smiles "I am happy for you."    "I already bought the ring." He takes out a black velvet box from his pocket and shows it to her. With shaky hands, she reaches forward for the box. Her breath is taken away and she feels like crying because how can another girl have everything she has ever wanted. "I just don't know how to pop the question so I was wondering…"    She looks up at her best friend and holds her breath, hoping and praying he wasn't going to ask her what she thought he was going to. "I was wondering if you would help me plan this special day. I mean you're in the wedding business so I am sure you know how to plan the perfect proposal."   At the hopeful look on his face, she knows she won't be able to reject him no matter how much it would break her to do this favour for him. So when she agrees and he thanks her a thousand times over and over, she knows it's too late to regret. She was going to plan the perfect proposal for her lover with another women.      The day of the proposal couldn't be more perfect. It was a dream to be standing where she was, surrounded by the best possible scenery. She had always dreamed of a proposal like this, where the guy would prepare only the best for her before dropping down on one knee and popping the question. Only where she was standing, was not where she belonged and everything here, was not hers.   "Don't peek."   Her head turns toward the far corner where she sees him lead his lover towards her. Slowly, she backs away into the shadows with a sad smile and her eyes glistening in tears. She watches as his lover gasp in surprise when he reveals the place to her, she watches his lover's happy tears when he gets down on one knee, and she watches as he spins her around, the biggest smile decorating his face, when his lover says yes.   Quietly, she turns around to leave.        Sammii turns away from her best friend and walks off. "Come on Sammii, Victoria really wants you to plan our wedding. She loves your work and honestly you're the only one I can trust with our big day" Changmin begs running after her. She swallows back the tears and shakes her head "I can't… I am… I am going to be busy with 2 other clients. I can't squeeze another wedding into my schedule."    He grabs her arms and turns her around "but I am your best friend, can't you do this for me? It's my special day. Victoria really wants you to plan our wedding and I do as well. Can't you hand the other clients over to an employee of yours? I never ask you for anything, ever." She avoids his look and shakes her head again. If she agrees to plan their wedding then she doesn't know how long she'll be able to take before she breaks. Her heart already shatters a bit whenever anyone mentions the wedding. She doesn't know if she can handle feigning a smile everyday as she comes closer and closer to handing the love of her life to another women without breaking down.    "I am sorry, I really can't. These clients are really important and whether I do this or not will affect my business. I am so sorry" she gives him an apologetic look then walks off without waiting for a reply.    He doesn't chase after her.       Dear Sammii,    You are formally invited to join the celebration of two beautiful souls as they promise themselves to one another.    She doesn't read the invitation a second time before blindly throwing the beautiful white card into the trash next to her desk. The beautiful calligraphy was already etched deep into her head and heart.        Sammii where are you? I've been calling you and messaging you for days. Your assistant says you're busy with your clients, but are you really busy to the point where you c