“-thinking of, well, we might have to pull the plug.”

The doctor was nodding, his face a mask of seriousness. Daeyeol didn’t like the way he was nodding, he wanted to tell him to stop. But like all the other things he hadn’t told the doctor, he didn’t say it.

“What do you mean – my brother…”

“It’s been two weeks in the coma, we really can’t hope after this…”

“We’re paying for this. Sungyeol hyung will wake up, you just have to give him time!” Daeyeol had never raised his voice in his life. Today was an exception. This man, wearing that white coat which gives him all kind of immunity, was trying to murder his brother. He wouldn’t let that happen; he wouldn’t let anything happen to Sungyeol.

“Your parents agree -”

“Screw my parents! I want him here, he will be here! He will wake up!” Nurses had gathered around them, some watching him fearfully, as if they were expecting him to attack the doctor. Some of the other visitors were also looking up curiously. The ICU corridors usually remained quiet, save for the sudden onset of heart-wrenching crying, signing the end of a life. No one argued here, no one.

Daeyeol was doing the exact opposite of what he had done all his life – he was arguing with someone, telling him he was wrong. He wouldn’t let Sungyeol slip by him so easily.

Sighing, the doctor said, “We’ll see another week.”

It was an ultimatum, and Daeyeol cursed at Sungjong. Where was he when Sungyeol needed him the most?

If I hadn’t loved you, my precious, I would have become a hermit. Because this life doesn’t suit me, only you do.

My blood type is B, so I have the bad habit of not liking anything for more than three days. There are so many things I was fascinated by once, but the attraction waned after a few days. I was left to find a new rush, something new that would make my heart race again.

You thought I was fickle, when you first saw the storeroom of my apartment, littered with toy helicopters, RC cars, vinegar bottles, Pokemon cards, Dragon Ball Z sketches, and the skeleton of a cat in a small casket (for the last time, I didn’t kill Jereumie, she died of natural causes). You probably wanted to back-track there and then, but I promised that I could change, that I would change – for you.

I did, didn’t I? Nothing could keep me away from you.

But what did you do?

It’s been 14 days, my love, and you’ve already moved on.

I envy your coping ability, but I pity your choice. The truth is, he will never look out for you the way I did, and he won’t be there to break your every fall, or carry you when you are too tired to go on. He won’t look as good as I did in the selfies beside you, and no matter what, his fingers won’t fit into the spaces between yours, like mine did. And most importantly, he will leave you, like I did, only sooner, and he’d have a choice.

I know Myungsoo - he was my best friend. He is a good man, albeit debatable, but he doesn’t need you to survive. He will whisper sweet things into your ear without ever meaning them and he will leave trails of kisses all over your body without ever feeling them. You were always naïve, dear, too gullible – you needed me to protect you.

But Myungsoo…he will only break you.

And this time, I won’t be there.