it almost look like some cult gathering with candle lights...strong upbeat music (contributed by hyoyeon)..bottles of...errm soju...campaign and red wine..

Taeyeon quickly closed the doors to the hotel room in fear that these images will be taken by some random paparazzi, as if there isn't enough damage to control...

Bitter smile spread across her face...."i am home"...she didn't want to lock her sight on any of her sister's eye for she was fearful that her well build defensive walls will crumble any moment from now..and she was thankful no one else spoke or asked how she was doing...they knew her...they knew words are meaningless to any of them at the moment..

Taeyeon was really thankful that they were busy with japan 3rd tour and all the usual endless repeats of smiling and answering 'same old question' for radio, television and whatever programmes in line for them. When was the last time they get to have the old gang together, talking about much ado about nothing..well maybe since yoona's birthday celebration, which she wasn't even able to make it due to practise sessions.

Drinks, jokes, random funny acts, mixed with some future serious talks...everything was just comfortable...the type of things you wouldn't mind doing for the rest of your life if the right company was around. Some occasional glance was caught looking at Taeyeon with concern but was quickly turned around when the person of affection turns to see, no one wanted to disturb this serene ambience of peace...something that they really wish to enjoy eventhough they have long opted for a life that will be scrutinised by whomever that felt he/she had the 'human right' to throw random critiques as long as they enjoy it.

Slowly as time slide by...the girls started dozing off...one by one...some on each other's shoulders while some laying with legs on sofa..and even seohyun drunk tonight (she learned that red wine can be really healthy...haha )..Taeyeon took a glance around thinking "how strange that everyone is dozing off before me, no wonder they say alcohol doesn't work when you most needed it to"....she walked to the washroom and drown her face in the basin filled with ice cold water ....10 sec...20 sec...30 sec until it became choking...just the way she felt...choked with emotion...fear that she will drag her sisters down..that she is no longer good enough to be with them.

She change to her sweat pants, light jacket and decide to walk to the nearby park along yodo river...how she missed her han river where she is familiar with all the quiet hidden spots of safety where she could cry or scream ...or just stare into the emptiness below...the water have a special calming effect...they look dark and endlessly deep to be able to swollow away all negativities..."yes, i need that" Taeyeon quicken her pace towards her resting zone.

8 little peas pop up their heads once the hotel room shut...

"hey fany...is taeng gonna be alright if we really leave her alone to do her routing staff, we are not in seoul right now" sooyoung

"she seemed really affected and i have read some of those post in instagram" fany

"taeyeon unnie will be fine." seohyun stated her 101 human behaviour and analysing the antis reaction etc and how long this whole episode will die off.

The conversation started going everyone mixed with concern followed by sadness and anger for the love of their sister.

"Shut up NOW" jessica decide its now or never that someone better decide fast as it is almost 1am in the morning..

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After walking for about 10 minutes, Taeyeon finally reach a more secluded side of the river...tears and emotion flowed freely as she started glancing and reading at some of the comments from the people she loved and supported her since her younger days. She was hurt to read their words of questioning but really thankful to the people that encouraged her...But it is never only about her...but about the people she wants to protect, her new found love and most importantly, her sisters that grew to be her family.

It may have been a passing thought but taeyeon really don't know what gotten into her as she took a slight higher step up along the railings...maybe she just wanted to have an unblock view of the city across, maybe it was just too painful..maybe....."GOT YOU!" Taeyeon was thrown onto the floor..with a human pile one by one on top of her..."unnie how could you" seohyun was crying away and "HELP!" sunny screaming "get off me now u giant" to sooyoung.

They quickly unpacked themselves and surrounded Taeyeon..Taeyeon tried to explained herself but after seeing them starting to cry one by one...she decided to coax them with gentle assuring words of forever..

"taengoo, u know we dont care what others say" sica

"and we will lov whom u love.." Hyoyeon

"u never left me when i was bashed" fany

"unnie...i..." seohyun continued to teared as emotions filled her

"unnie..i am sorry it all started with me and if only..." yoona couldn't continue as jessica's icy stare technique is now impacted to all the members.."gomawa.." yoona knows they all love her and will always protect her like they always had and won't take it even for a split second for her to blame herself

"Tae..i know you feel the need to be strong but you are not the only eldest around and you have to believe in us and sone that will always stand up for us. Let them say what they have to say, and true friends stay." sunny look into taeyeon's eye with not even a flicker or blink to show her seriousness

"we are one and forever one" yuri

"I understand what you have been through, I even tried to hide as I wasn't ready to face the world. We are just humans and girls that needed to be love. They will eventually understand"

That night, the 9 of them sat like children on the grounds of the park looking into the dark skies. They understand that their friendship are like the stars that remained in the sky and will always be there for each other. It may not shine brightly like the sun but they will be each other's guardian angel in the darkest night.

"lets get down to business...shall we" sooyoung started pulling out her phone as they put all heads together to draft the reply message Taeyeon post onto her instagram that night. 8 powerful angels of star were with her that night and she know that she will pull through even the darkest night.

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That is all....its boring I know, but I still wanted to write something for them and for all the sone that cares.

Sweet dreams