You tuck me in, turned out the light
Kept me safe and sound at night
I still depend on things like that

Changmin has been the maknae of the Dong Bang Shin Ki group. And he had always been. Being the youngest, he gets all the attention he needs and he gets to be really well taken care of.

Kim Jae Joong, the eldest of the group, was his loveable Umma. Every time he would run to his Umma and plead for food, Jae Joong would instantly give him a soft smile and ask him what he wants to eat. Changmin’s eyes would then sparkle and with no second thoughts, would ask for Jae Joong’s specialty, his kimchi jjigae. Not wanting his beloved maknae and ‘youngest son’ to get hungry, Jae Joong would give the younger man a pinch on the cheek before turning his back and would then immediately begin in cooking.

Jung YunHo, the leader of the group and the second eldest, was his Appa. Every time his Junsu or YooChun hyung or perhaps both would do things that would irk him to no end, he would turn to his Appa and tell him that his hyungs were making fun of him. Seeing his ‘youngest son’s’ pout and eyes that pleads for help, YunHo would cast this hard stare on Junsu and YooChun and the two would cower in fear, run towards their shared room and promise to their selves that they would make fun of Changmin if YunHo’s not around. The leader would then turn to the maknae, pat him lovingly on the head and tell him with a boyish smile that he needs not to worry about his hyungs in pestering him and that he should rest or eat.

You brush my teeth and comb my hair
Had to drive me everywhere
You were always there when I looked back

When the three youngest members of the group makes a mess, Jae Joong would no doubt give them a long and never ending rant, telling them that being clean and organized are one of their top priorities.

He’ll scold YooChun for leaving his compositions anywhere, saying that he should keep them somewhere safe so that when he’ll look for them he could find them right away. And he must also put in mind that his compositions are his treasures. You don’t want your talent to get wasted now, hmm? Jae Joong would teasingly ask in that motherly voice of his.

Jae Joong would scold Junsu for playing with a soccer ball inside their premises, he’s scared that their precious ornaments and decoration around the place might get smashed and break into pieces. He’ll advise Junsu to play outside with his friends instead, rest assured that Junsu will have more fun playing outdoors. Try playing with YooChun, make that kid get his off from making too much compositions and if he’s your opponent you don’t have to worry in losing, Jae Joong would suggest, giving Junsu a wink.

When it comes to Changmin making a mess, Jae Joong would still scold him like the rest but it’s sort of different. Seeing that the maknae’s room was like a jungle, the Umma of the group with both of his hands placed on his small hips, would let out a huff and start in picking up the scattered pieces of clothes as far as his vision could clearly see.

He’ll arrange the things that were disarranged on Changmin’s bedside table and complains when he sees garbage and trash that weren’t supposed to be there. Why are there still wrappers of candies here? Remember to throw them Min-ah, ants love to feast on things like these, and Jae Joong would throw the wrappers himself.

Before he makes the maknae’s bed; We don’t like to sleep in a bed like this, eh? No one will have a good night sleep if the bed he’s sleeping on is exactly like this, Jae Joong would point to the crumpled sheet of blanket, the pillows which doesn’t have their cases anymore and he’d let out a sigh, setting off to do his task.

He’ll neatly fold the unused clothes that were strewn everywhere, and toss the underwear into the laundry basket which Changmin, himself, forgets to do. Min-ah, we know that hangers exist for clothes that need to be hanged. Like this one. Jae Joong presents a polo shirt in front of Changmin’s face, the one he just threw the other day somewhere on the corner of his room after taking it off because he thinks that it didn’t went well with his pants.  

Changmin could only bit his lip and hung his head low as Jae Joong continued to clean his room. Afraid to make his hyung angry, Changmin would then do what he has to do and he’d start cleaning too. When he thought that Jae Joong had went out and left him to do the task himself, he’ll look over his shoulder and find that Jae Joong was still there. He was still pacing around Changmin’s room, tending and arranging to that and this thing, and the youngest would watch him with careful and concerned eyes and he admits that he’s truly blessed.  Hyung, Thank You.

You had to do it all alone
Make a living, make a home
Must have been as hard as it could be

There was a time when YunHo went home late and he was so tired and worn out. He got so engrossed in practicing the dance moves he made himself for the choreography of the group’s upcoming performance that he left the studio around quarter to 11 in the evening. Though, it was obvious that he wants to rest, he didn’t fail to greet and give warm smiles towards s.

 Jae Joong went to his rescue and helped the leader to take a seat on a nearby couch. YooChun and Junsu who were bickering at each other stopped their quarrel as YunHo’s presence became known in the room and immediately dashed to the kitchen to get some food and a bottle of cold water for their hyung/father. Changmin stood in front of his Appa and watched with pure interest as Jae Joong started to massaged YunHo’s tired feet and legs. YooChun and Junsu returned from the kitchen as the leader started to say something. Jae Joong continued on massaging while Changmin was still standing and observing.

I finished and perfected the dance moves today and we could practice them tomorrow, YunHo said and accepted with a nod as YooChun handed him a bottle of cold water.

Are the moves easy, hyung?, Junsu asked

Practice makes perfect Junsu-ah. We could perform the moves well if we cooperate with each other, YunHo said in an assuring tone, taking a small sip of water. YooChun then handed him a chicken sandwich, YunHo accepted it with a nod again.

Trust YunHo, I know that he’ll be patient in teaching you the moves tomorrow. He’s a man of his words after all, Jae Joong smiled, looking up to the leader giving him a pat on his thigh.

The other members said nothing but giggled at the sight of their ‘parents’ being all mushy. Changmin could only watch in amusement as to how this family of his interacts with each other. And with a determination of not wanting to let them all down, he cheered to himself, I’ll do my best tomorrow for everyone!

And when I couldn’t sleep at night
Scared things wouldn’t turn out right
You would hold my hand and sing to me

Changmin had a bad dream, no scratch that, he had a nightmare. And remembering it as he opened his eyes in a dark room all to himself, he started to cry. No, that was only a dream and it will not happen. He will not let it happen. But.. But flashes of his dream, his scary nightmare, came rushing to him and he can’t help but let out a scream.

Jae Joong and YunHo were the ones who rushed into the maknae’s room as soon as they heard him. And the sight of their youngest, who’s so scared and crying like there’s no tomorrow crushed their hearts. They went over to his bed and started to console him.

Hyung, don’t leave me. Don’t leave me and YunHo hyung. Changmin sobbed as he stared at Jae Joong with longing eyes.

The lead singer was confused but he shook his head and assured the youngest, Of course, Minnie. I won’t. Hyung, won’t leave you. Jae Joong looks up to glance at the leader and gave YunHo the look that meant, what is he implying?

YunHo could only reply in a shrug and Jae Joong’s confusion was also etched on the leader’s face.

A moment later, YooChun and Junsu entered the room; worry was evident on their faces. Seeing them and remembering his dream again, Changmin’s cries didn’t slow down.

We will all stick together, you must promise me that. You won’t leave me, we won’t leave each other. We, the 5 of us must stick together no matter what happens. The 4 other members didn’t know what the youngest was trying to prove but all they had in mind was to assure him that, yes, they won’t leave him and that the 5 of them will stick together forever. Even for eternity.

Silence surrounded the Dong Bang Shin Ki group as the maknae’s sobs started to fade away. Jae Joong wiped a tear from Changmin’s cheek and held his hand. YunHo held Changmin’s other hand while Junsu and Yoochun sat at the foot of the bed, giving Changmin the assurance that they’ll be there when he needs them.

You want us to sing a song for you?, the Umma of the group asked with a tender voice.

Changmin nodded his head timidly and the others smiled on that very action. There was silence that stirred for a while but it was gone when the Umma, the lead singer, Jae Joong himself opened his lips to sing and the other members followed his lead.

Caterpillar in the tree
How you wonder who you’ll be
Can’t go far but you will always dream

When Changmin was young, he did wonder what he’ll become of. He had lots of options in mind and all of them were all to his liking. He wanted to be a scientist because he thinks that discovering new things were fun. Not to mention the time on how his brain managed to rationalize the thought that if he peed on the gutter it would then evaporate with the help of the sun but it turned out to be a complete failure because what he formulated in his head wasn’t the same exact thing that happened at that time. He also wanted to become a politician because he likes to know how it’d feel to serve his fellow men. And the very own image of himself wearing a suit and talking and speaking out for his self and for his people gave him the thrill and pure excitement of becoming one. He also wanted to be a doctor, a businessman, a teacher and etc. but it didn’t occur to him that becoming a singer is what he’s destined to be. He admits that he has talent for singing and his passion for music couldn’t be compared to anything. And now that he has his fellow bandmates, Changmin knows and he knew well that this is where he’s supposed to be, to be part of Dong Bang Shin Ki, to be one and to be together with them.

Wish you may, wish you might
Don’t you worry hold on tight

During their trainee days, Changmin had come to the decision of giving up. He was tired and exhausted from all the practice and from the pressure of debuting as a singer and a dancer but he did want to become a celebrity so badly. The mere thought of being liked and admired by thousands of fans gave him the will to continue what he started. But he didn’t thought that it would come to the point that he feels like his own soul was getting eaten up as he forgets to take care of himself and worry more about perfecting in reaching high notes and familiarizing his self with dance moves that he thought he can’t perform. He almost forgot who he was because he had to build up to his new image; he’s not going to be Shim Changmin when he’ll be on stage. Instead, he’s going to be Choikang Changmin, the person who’s going to sing and dance and perform in front of millions of fans. But what truly stopped him and who changed his mind from giving up in reaching his dream were his co-members and their advice. They told him that he must not let the image of Choikang Changmin cover or take over the real Shim Changmin. He could show his true self, the real Shim Changmin, to his loyal fans and to the whole wide world and just carry the name of Choikang Changmin. There was a big difference between the two because Shim Changmin was what he really was while Choikang Changmin was just a name he’s going to use as a star.

I promise you there will come a day
Butterfly fly away

As the members continued to sing for him, Changmin closed his eyes like a baby who’s about to fall asleep. Lullabies, words of comfort and love came from the lips of the members as they watched their dongsaeng about to fall into slumber. They loved him truly like their own son and brother, their very own flesh and blood,  and nothing could ever replace the Shim Changmin that the boy group Dong Bang Shin Ki has because this little kid in front of them will always be there little brother, their maknae. Their very own irreplaceable and one of a kind maknae.

If you want to perform in front of many people not because you want fame but because you want to share something special to them, then someday, when you’re on stage and you’ll try to look back on the times when we’re still trainees, you could say to yourself that it’s worth it. That everything you’ve worked hard for was really worth it. The words of his leader, of Dong Bang Shin Ki, rang in his head while the beaming faces on how his other members agreed on this statement flashed in his mind and Changmin could only smile at the memory.

Yes, it was all worth it because I was with you guys. I was with Dong Bang Shin Ki.

-THE END-
 

A/N: I wish they’ll be together again. That’s all I’m asking. :) Thanks for reading everyone~