Half proof-read only orz

If there’s one thing Donghae absolutely loathes, other than his mistake of scribbling Hyukjae’s name with heart doodles on his math notebook and everything else that came after that, it’s the fact that he’s fat.

When he was a kid, it didn’t seem to be too much of a problem. Many kids were fat. He wasn’t alone in it. But what was weird was when he and fellow kids his age entered puberty, everyone else seemed to lose the extra weight they had, but Donghae was the only special snowflake that didn’t.

One would think it was just him who lacked the effort of cutting down on food, but truthfully, he tried.

As unbelievable as that sounds, Donghae really, really tried.

When he began to stick out like a sore thumb amidst all his thin classmates in middle school, he had tried this thing they called diet. For months, he refused to eat more than what everyone else did. He abstained from rice and all sources of carbohydrates. He ate more fruits and vegetables instead of the pork he loved so much. He tried to exercise despite the fact that ten minutes of simply walking already made him feel tired and sweat like a pig.

Despite that though, his weight barely decreased. And one night of giving in to his dear samgyupsal led to another, and soon enough, he was already giving up.

So what if he’s fat? So what if he eats more than everyone else? Him being fat wouldn’t kill anyone else but himself, so people shouldn’t care that much about it, right?

Wrong.

He hated being bullied, like every other kid did. But the one thing that Donghae was relieved about was the fact that although he was teased and insulted and mocked on a daily basis, he wasn’t being hurt physically. Sure, there were pushes and shoves every now and then, shoulders bumping harshly against his and nearly toppling his fat self over, to the point that he gets scared that he would fall and roll down the hallway like the round thing he is, and everyone would laugh at him because he’s like a human ball of entertainment to them thin people.

But at least he wasn’t bruised and bleeding.

The way he knew some other kids were.

That’s why Donghae believes that despite his rather low position on the social class ranking, he’s still not in the bottom of this harsh food chain called high school. He’s still not one of those geeks and nerds with braces, acne and glasses, who would get their asses and other body parts kicked literally every afternoon.

Donghae is fat and he’s got no friends and he’s tormented every single day.

But at least he gets out of it unscathed.

Physically, at least.

That’s why he doesn’t cry. Doesn’t beg for them to stop and have mercy for his pitiful self. Because even if he’s pitiful, he’s never got the worst of it. At least not yet. Hopefully.

But then his stupidity with the heart doodles and Hyukjae’s confession happened.

And now, from being the nobody that was only known to some teachers and bullies, he’s suddenly the talk of the town.

Even girls talk about him now.

Sometimes they also talk to him directly. Although not in a nice manner.

“I heard Hyukjae-sunbaenim confessed to you,” says the girl with bleached hair whose name Donghae couldn’t even be bothered to remember, a sneer on her and her friend’s faces as they surround him on an empty corner of the campus. The late afternoon sunlight makes her hair glow prettily. She is pretty, Donghae thinks, but the scowl on her face makes her look scary. “Did you start that rumor yourself, you delusional pig?”

“Do you seriously think you stand a chance with him, fat pig?” the red-haired girl on the right says, arm reaching out to push lightly at his shoulder.

“You better stay away from him,” a brunette girl says, lips curling into a snarl as she raises a hand as if to hit Donghae, but snickers when he flinches in terror. “Well, seeing as you’re so terrified of us, I suppose you’re going to listen. Know your place and stay away. Hyukjae-sunbaenim is ours.”

It’s kinda funny how Donghae is certain that they are younger than him and that they shouldn’t be going around disrespecting him like this, because fat or not, it’s not nice to be rude to elders. Hello, it’s South Korea.

It’s also funny how they claim that they own Hyukjae but Donghae has never seen any of them near the popular ace swimmer. Simply because he watches him all the time, but he’s never seen any of these girls in close proximity because all they could do was to ogle him from afar. Just like Donghae. But he’s still theirs, apparently. Of course. Sure.

But what’s funnier is how Donghae is actually a little scared because hell, those nails adorning those tiny little hands and fingers look like they could kill. Or maybe they have killed already because they’re all covered in red.

He shudders at the thought of these young ladies using their victims’ blood as nail polish.

“If we ever hear word of you hanging around Hyukjae-sunbaenim,” the girl with bleached hair, who Donghae assumes to be their leader, steps forward and leans into his personal space, making him squirm uncomfortably against the wall behind him. “I swear to god, you little pig, I’m going to roast you. Alive.”

Donghae might have released a horrified squeak because the girls all cackled manically before sauntering off, skirts swishing and long hair flipping.

Jesus.

He stares after their retreating figures, the fear slowly dissipating and mild offense and irritation seeping in.

God, how he wanted to sit on them, just to show them how he could actually crush them. They were such twigs compared to him. How do they even plan to roast him?

“All this because he confessed to me,” Donghae mutters quietly, pushing himself off the wall and turning to walk towards the building where the locker room is located. “It was better when I was invisible to most people. I was fine when they didn’t care. I don’t even want them to care so why are they all—oh my god!”

He makes a flustered noise as he jumps and places a hand on his chest, gaping in surprise at Hyukjae, who is standing a few steps away from him with a look on his face that Donghae couldn’t quite place. It’s an expression he’s never seen before despite the fact that he was always looking at this boy.

“Sorry for startling you,” the raven-haired boy says softly with a small smile. “I-I wanted to talk to you. If that’s okay.”

“A-About what?” Donghae manages to force himself to speak. He feels his own heart racing beneath all the fats of his chest, and it’s quite an incredible feat. It’s only like this during gym class. He looks around, fearing that the girls with the bloody red nails would see and come back to finally scratch at his face, but to his relief, the coast is clear.

“Well,” Hyukjae shifts on his feet, eyes darting around nervously as he scratches on his nape. “I don’t know what to make of what happened yesterday after I… confessed,” Donghae swears his breathing did not just hitch, “but I’m sure I made you feel uncomfortable and probably put you in a really awkward position. So I – I’d like to apologize.”

Well, here it is.

Hyukjae is finally taking it back. As Donghae expected, he really didn’t mean that confession. It was all probably pity. Of course. Hyukjae is kind after all.

Somehow, Donghae is relieved that he reacted to the confession the way he did, instead of jumping Hyukjae in his utter glee and joy, and probably sending him crashing to the ground and breaking some bones due to Donghae’s weight.

Sadly, despite the fact that he’s known from the start that Hyukjae liking him is impossible, a part of him had been happy to hear Hyukjae’s confession, and now that he’s taking it back and telling the truth, Donghae still feels a little prickle of hurt in his chest.

Just a little, he convinces himself.

He wills himself not to cry.

Not yet, at least.

“I’m sorry,” Hyukjae says. “For putting you through that and, well… for having no intentions to stop.”

Wait, what?

“I know that people are going to talk, and some of them are probably going to bully you even more,” Hyukjae continues, glancing up at him through his fringe. “But… I’m going to do my best to make sure no one hurts you anymore. I… I really like you, Donghae. And I’m really sorry for not standing up for you sooner. I know I should have but I was—”

“Why?”

Hyukjae pauses and stares at him, looking confused and wary. “Why what?”

“Why do you like me?” Donghae asks, eyes wide and disbelief evident in his voice. “Why would you like me? I’m—I’m…fat.”

The popular ace swimmer looks even more confused. “I don’t see why I shouldn’t like you because of that?”

“Y-You couldn’t possibly like me because of that though,” Donghae says, shaking his head, because no matter how nice it is to hear those words, no matter how they made his heart drum harshly against his chest, making him fear the chances of cardiac arrest again, they’re just too good to be true.

“Maybe you’re right,” Hyukjae replies, conviction and certainty in his voice. “But of course that doesn’t mean there isn’t anything about you to be liked. You’re kind, gentle and intelligent. You’re patient and strong. And so much more. You have no idea how much I admire you, Donghae.”

“W-Why?” Donghae asks again, although he’s pretty sure the color of his face is the same as yesterday, similar to a ripe tomato or the inside of a watermelon. Or worse, a roasted pig. “I’m not—I’m not any of those words you said.”

“Yes you are,” Hyukjae says, voice softening as he steps closer to Donghae as if to hold him, but the latter only steps backward. “Please don’t run away again. I’m sorry. I just—I wanted to be friends with you. I mean, if you really didn’t like me like they said… at least let me be friends with you? Please?”

Donghae stares at him in disbelief, at his hopeful face and small pout, and it really feels like he’s going to get a heart attack as breathing is becoming quite a difficult chore.

Because Lee Hyukjae sporting that look.

And Donghae couldn’t take it anymore.

“I-I… I like you too,” Donghae whispers shyly, looking down to the floor and inwardly cursing the double chin that prevented him from hiding his face completely.

“You do? You really do?” Hyukjae asks, and from the sound of his voice, Donghae could already imagine his entire face lighting up, a perfect, gummy smile tugging at his lips.

He nods and nibbles on his own thin lips, his stubby fingers fiddling with the hem of his shirt. “Yes… but this is very hard for me to believe. Y-You liking me, I mean.”

“Then let me convince you,” Hyukjae says stubbornly, and the words make Donghae’s eyes automatically flit towards his face in genuine surprise. “Let me show you that I really like you. Please go out with me. I’ll be a