The reason we push through life is because society makes us. The constant and never ending desire to become and do better has been taught to us from childhood on. We keep developing and improving. We’re always looking at our feet stepping forward instead of looking up and around us. We’re always criticising every step and most of the time we are dissatisfied with for example how far it takes us or how fast we go.

And as we go we forget to actually live.

Stress was at Hyejoon's throat this month with finals and the deadline of her internship application coming closer. Well, in two days actually, and all of her requests and applications were met with rejection. With a tap of her mouse she had sent yet another e-mail on it's way in the hopes of receiving positive news this time around. News she had been waiting for for months. It wouldn't have bothered her this much if she hadn't spent months applying at dozens of schools and institutes, even the night schools and tutoring academies had rejected her. She didn't really know why because none of the rejections provided her with useful feedback if she even had gotten a reply at all that was longer than two sentences. Sure, her resume wasn't all that impressive but not being invited for even one interview was a bit too much to take.

Her head dropped to the table beside her steaming cup of chocolate milk and a

sigh escaped her at the refreshing contact of her cheek with the cold wooden surface. Luckily the café wasn't as crowded as usually around this time and there weren't many people to witness Hyejoon's little tantrum to her friend. The short mocha and donut enthusiast across the table however didn't seem to be very surprised by the current scene. She had witnessed something very similar last week, and the week before that. So being used to this routine she decided to pick up her fork and offer Hyejoon a bite of her red velvet cake. With an exasperated sigh she lifted her head the slightest to close her lips around the fork and waited for the other to pull it back before returning to her previous position.

“Let's just hope you get a response today and I'll try asking my teacher for a reference. Don't give up hope yet.”

“How, Baeri?! I have less than 48 hours Ieft!” Hyejoon helplessly exclaimed.

“That's still that many hours. Be patient and persistent.”

Hyejoon let out a frustrated groan at her friend's nonchalant shrug. Her whole third year depended on this internship and now that she finally had found a decent place to live, college was making her life miserable. They wrapped up lunch and went their own paths after their brief meeting. It was nice to catch up with her friend, even if she had to put up with her constant teasing. Then again she always made sure to return the favour at some point.

Back at home Hyejoon found herself swaying back to her laptop every few moments like a boomerang. Doojoon had taken note of her rather peculiar behaviour but chose not to comment on it at first, but after three hours it started to irk him and make him curious. He knew that whenever Kim Hyejoon got worked up it involved college. Finally he decided to close his book and divert his attention towards that tinge of curiosity.

“Everything okay, Hyejoon-ah?”

Hyejoon dumped herself in the coffee brown couch and let herself fall back into the soft cushions as she released a sigh Ioaded with so much frustration that Doojoon was convinced that he could taste it. He couldn't help the snicker when Hyejoon’s trademark groan followed. She shuffled in her seat for a while until she managed to take out her iphone and finally turned to face him.

“My life is hanging on a really thin thread and I am ready to kill myself if it snaps, which I'm sure it will.” she recited in mind.

“I guess…” she replied instead followed by another groan.

She glanced at her roommate who anticipated a rant about college, patience written all over his stature. Unfortunately Doojoon had a really inviting personality opposite to what one would think, and Hyejoon felt herself giving in. It was weird how easy it was to talk to him about daily matters. Spilling the chaos that was her mind over the table helped her to view everything again with a different perspective.

“I keep getting rejected for internships everywhere I apply and my deadline is the day after tomorrow.” she finally elaborated and let herself sink deeper into the couch.

Doojoon let out a thoughtful hum. “What are you looking for?” he asked after a brief pause.

“A spot as an English teacher. Any kind of educational institute would do really. But a high school or middle school would be most desirable.” she let out a sigh before continuing, “I can't really afford being picky at this point and without personal connections or a referral by a professor you're basically screwed.”

Hearing the words coming out of her own mouth ringing in her ears instead of having them roam around her mind as a hazy thought, had Hyejoon realise how bad her situation was. Could she give up on hope now?

“Maybe I can ask my homeroom teachers from middle and high school?”

The student's eyes shot up at the suggestion and the rest of her body followed soon after. “You would? Why?”

“You don't want to take up on my offer?” Doojoon dared with a small smirk and raised eyebrow.

"No, no, please do, that would be really great!” she quickly corrected herself. “But why?”

Doojoon had grown aware of the girl's personality not allowing her to take anything for granted and to repay any deed. “Consider it a favour.” he simply proposed.

He waited for any kind of response and Hyejoon had settled with a nod.

“I'll contact them tomorrow and let you know. I used to be pretty close with my Homeroom teacher in high school. He teaches English so you're in luck.” Doojoon's eyes were on Hyejoon's face who had an expression he couldn't quite read. “what's wrong?”

"I... Thanks Doojoon-oppa.”

Hyejoon fell silent as she felt her lips tug, mirroring the smile on Doojoon's face.

Hyejoon found out that Doojoon was a man of his word and his promises were sincere when she received a call the next morning. Even someone who wasn't a morning person could rise early when the stress levels were high enough. But that didn't necessarily mean that she had to be in what she had named her tolerating mood. Hyejoon's scowls frequented every morning with very few exceptions and this particular morning wasn't one of them. The college student had been glaring at her laptop screen displaying the list of her e-mail inbox and praying for a miracle to occur when her phone started buzzing. In her hectic hurry she almost spilled her glass of milk over her laptop. Luckily the glass regained its balance and only a few drops of white stained the table and her paperwork.

To Hyejoon's delight but also surprise the phone call went smoothly despite her nerves and hatred towards said social obligation. She had even received an invitation for an appointment at the school that afternoon, since he was meeting with another intern anyway. The mention of another candidate made Hyejoon's nerves reach a peak she never could have imagined to reach. She did try to convince herself that she could make it and be chosen. A text exchange with Baeri also told her the same. Above that Baeri suggested the possibility that there could be more than one spot for interns to fill in. All this encouragement should have helped to calm her down. But it didn't. She even felt that it was getting worse the closer it got to the meeting time.

It seemed like Hyejoon had little to worry about her competition. she found out that the other intern was already accepted and she had been invited to receive her schedule and other information. For Hyejoon it was a formal job interview in which she had to convince them why she was perfect for the job. Could she though? When Hyejoon had also explained her situation and the time of her deadline, the vice-principal had promised to give her notice the next early afternoon. She had been the last to be interviewed among a few others that had also applied, which meant that all they had left to do was discuss everything among themselves and let her know the outcome.

The rest of the evening she had received a few more rejections, which only built up her stress, causing her to be unable to close an eye that night. She ended up sleeping only briefly, for about an hour maybe, and left her bed at 7 am upon her stomach's request to be filled. Unwillingly Hyejoon stepped out of her bed and added her hoodie as an extra layer of protection against the cold on top of her pajamas. But once in the kitchen nothing seemed to fit her appetite, some of the content of her fridge even nauseated her. Hyejoon ended up only taking a tangerine and a banana to soothe her whining stomach.

Hyejoon didn't feel like putting effort in the nutritional value of her meals that morning and afternoon. Her breakfast consisted of two pieces of fruit and her lunch had been just as simple. Peanut butter was a person's best friend along with a few slices of bread and a cold refreshing glass of milk. Her study books were spread in front of her and the pen in her hand scribbled away, making notes underlining the important parts and when she was reading it was either tapping on the table or tucked in between her lips. The familiar melody resonating from the speakers of her phone at ten past one caused her to jolt in her seat as the beating of her heart picked up in rate and intensity. It took everything in her to answer the call with the news.

Hearing a crash from the other side of the wall had Doojoon halt his movements for a moment. He waited for anything to follow and when finally nothing did, he washed the shaving cream off his face with the towel around his neck without removing it. He hated it when water drops slid down his neck from his wet hair after a shower. He stepped out of his bathroom into their shared space and walked into a scene of a rather flustered Hyejoon trying to pry up the chair she knocked over. Her phone was still in her hands and judging from the screen that just blinked off she was on the phone until a few moments ago. He watched amused as she gathered the few books and papers that had also been scattered over the floor and Doojoon found himself trying to imagine how this scene came to be.

“And?” he asked, holding himself back from laughing at the woman’s startled jolt that caused the chair to topple over before it was even standing straight.

She let out a groan attempted a glare but in what seemed like realisation to Doojoon, her face went blank as she stared in awe at her phone. Her gaze shifted from her device to her roommate and she let out a relieved sigh as she dropped in the chair she had been wrestling with moments ago. Doojoon walked over to the couch and dropped to the floor in front of it leaning against the couch. The glass of lemon water he had prepared before his shower was still in the same spot on the coffee table in front of the couch. He heard the scraping of a chair and soft steps closing in on him. The rustle of the leather behind him indicated that his roommate was ready to answer his question. He felt her lift the towel from his shoulders and wrap around the sides of his head.

“I got the internship spot…” she finally let out. Doojoon noticed the distant tone of disbelief in her voice. “I still can’t really believe it. But they told me to start Tuesday. I have to drop by on Monday for a team introduction and to discuss which classes I’ll be teaching. The other intern is also teaching English so we have to work together quite often they said.”

Aside of a hum here and there in response Doojoon was pretty much silent as he sipped his water and let Hyejoon dry his hair for him. In the months they had been living together they had become very used to each other’s presences. Hyejoon wasn’t sure whether she could call it a friendship or not. But the two were comfortable enough to share moments and certain things. They paced around each other naturally and clashing was a very rare occurrence. They had instinctively grown adapted to each other.

Kim Hyejoon was a pretty enjoyable roommate, Doojoon found out. She was careful with things and aside from the occasional collision into walls or furniture there wasn’t any problem. She handled things with utmost care and dusted and cleaned regularly. Yoon Doojoon, although a neat freak and very precise with everything was also very generous and sociable. But not in a pushy way, Hyejoon found out after living with him that he would probably be a good husband and father later in his life. They had very peaceful and uncomplicated circumstances of their relationship as roommates.

Hyejoon dropped the towel back over Doojoon’s head after finishing her story and expressing her nerves. Doojoon found himself laughing at that. “You’ll do fine. Just make sure not to curse in class.” Hyejoon rolled her eyes as she lightly whipped the towel at his head and dropped it to his shoulders muttering an ‘all done’.

Doojoon thanked her and held up his phone with the screen of the website of a take out restaurant high enough for her to be able to see. He tilted his head upwards to look at her. “Want to order take out? I don’t feel like cooking.” he suggested. “There should still be money left for this week’s groceries we don’t really need. So I suggest chicken and Fast and Furious.”

“Fine with me.” Hyejoon chimed in. “It’s a date.”

With a small smile at his lips Doojoon placed the phone against his ear to make an order after Hyejoon told him what she’d like.

Monday morning arrived and Hyejoon admitted that she looked very appropriate for a first day at internship. Even Doojoon had given her some sort approval and an encouraging pat on the back before jumping into the shower in a rush. Once the two had grabbed a bite for breakfast Doojoon noticed that she had become very nervous. A few exchanges of lame jokes and a short-lived talk about the weather eased her up the slightest. A glance at her phone told her it was only half past seven. She still had an hour to reach the school. Hyejoon scanned the contents of her bag to make sure everything was inside. Wallet, keys, earphones, notebook and her folder with the necessary papers and her college assignments. With a relieved sigh she zipped her bag and placed it on the floor to grab her coat.

“Ready to go?” Doojoon called as he joined her in the hallway.

“Yeah. Can you lock up? I’m going to miss the bus.” she worried as she tied her laces.

“I’ll drop you off. It’s rush hour, you are not going to survive that.” he notified her as he searched for the key to tug into the lock. “Besides I have to pick up Yoseob anyway.”

Although a bit taken aback Hyejoon accepted the offer and made a promise to take the elder out for barbecue soon to treat him. Doojoon accepted with a grin. He had been right. They passed the bus on their way and Hyejoon found herself cringing at how jampacked it was. By car it only took them fifteen minutes to reach the school and the moment the mostly white building came into sight she felt her nerves acting up again. Her eyes were fixated on the construction in the distance. They zoomed passed students on their bikes or walking to school, all donning the same uniform.

“They changed the uniforms,” she heard the singer note. As the car sped down and eventually stopped her eyes fell on the girls and boys busy among themselves. Normally she’d have made some sort of joke or remark in return about his age. It was almost endearing how nervous she was today.

Doojoon smiled reassuringly at her expression of her gratitude. “Don’t worry too much, you’ll do great.” he told her and let out a small laugh at her nervous laugh as she turned away and waved. But before she walked away, the dark haired was stopped by the call of her name.

“Hyejoon-ah,” she had heard and eyed the male in the car. “When you’re home I want to talk to you about something.”

“Okay?” she found herself replying. “Sure.”

“I’m Seo Mirae, it is nice to meet you. I’m sure that I will learn a lot from the experiences during this internship.”

When the young woman beside rose from her bow in front of the group of teachers in the room Hyejoon titled her upper body downwards to utter a similar greeting. “Hello, I’m Kim Hyejoon. Thank you for accepting my application. I hope to learn a lot and also have an educational and fun experience at this school.”

Her introduction to the teachers hadn’t been awful. She learnt a lot by following the assigned supervisor around and found solace in the other intern being very close in age to her. They kicked off rather well, especially after complaining about the uptight regulations and their very horrifying schedules. Both Hyejoon and Mirae were the first to complain about early mornings. The rest of the day consisted of being shown around the buildings and meeting the principal and vice principal of the school. A very simple day where they were allowed to explore and sightsee. Around noon the two interns were allowed to leave and after being advised by a younger teacher to observe at least one class before they went home out of manners they found themselves leaving the gates at around half past one. This had concluded day zero and Hyejoon was pretty confident and satisfied with how it went.

Back at home however a storm of confusion and surprise hit her square in the face.

“W-w-wait… What?”

Her eyes were fixed on the dark haired across her whose brows almost tangled in uneasiness.

“If you’re not comfortable with anything then I understand,” were his words in return to her outburst. When he was only met with dumbfounded silence, Doojoon exhaled unsurely. “I’m… You know what, forget it. I’m sorry for making things awkward.”

Okay, maybe things were a bit more complicated than she believed and they were not just roommates.