You left. Kim Heechul, you really left.

Looking at your back view as you entered the gates,

The gates which will hide you from me for two years.

Tears started streaming down my face once again,

My face which you held countless of times.

As your silhouette faded into the camp,

The camp where you’ll be for the next two years.

I could only hold back myself from calling after you,

The calls of wanting you back with me right now.

I watched as the gates closed on me,

Watching with the hope that you’ll come running back to my side.

I waited,

The clock ticking away.

Time flew and I knew you weren’t going to appear,

Like I had known all along.

I broke down, finally,

As the last piece of hope vanished.

A pair of arms wrapped around my small frame,

Even though I knew it wasn’t you,

I hoped once again,

Hoping that maybe God answered my prayers.

Yet, to only turn to find Siwon hugging me,

His heart as fragile as mine.

I sobbed in his chest,

Wishing all the while that it was yours.

Memories came back,

Those of you, and some of us.

Remembering how you faced all the harsh critics on your unique personality,

Remembering the time where you got into the accident,

Remembering the times where your members got into an accident and how worried you were,

Remembering how miserable you were when Hankyung left,

Remembering how painful it was for you to see Young Woon got into trouble

Remembering the pain you felt when Kibum went on hiatus,

Remembering how angry you felt seeing Henry and Zhoumi get bashed up by Only13 Elfs,

Remembering you telling me how Jungsoo was suffering because of the members leaving one by one,

Remembering you telling me how Jong Woon felt when the members started leaving,

Remembering you telling me how Dong Hee was nervous to announce to the world that he was dating,

Remembering you telling me how horrible Sungmin felt when Zhoumi and Henry were being discriminated,

Remembering you telling me how Hyuk Jae was missing his Hyungs,

Remembering you telling me how Donghae was shedding tears for the missing members,

Remembering you telling me how Siwon was praying every night for the safety of the other members,

Remembering you telling me how Ryeowook misses the guys all sitting together eating his home-cooked meals,

Remembering you telling me how Kyuhyun wanted all his Hyungs back together.

I looked up from Siwon’s arms and saw the state of your members.

Jungsoo trying to smile but tears were streaming down his face.

Jong Woon and Ryeowook hugging each other, arms shaking violently.

Shindong with his face buried in his hands, sobbing silently.

Hyuk Jae and Donghae crying together, Hyuk Jae silently while Donghae let out loud sobs.

Siwon holding me with sobs escaping his lips now and then.

Sungmin and Kyuhyun looking at the gates with tears falling.

Henry and Zhoumi with tears falling freely.

Then, I turned to looked at the ELFs beside us.

There were tears, smiles and some poker faces, trying to hide their tears.

You left. Kim Heechul, you really left.

But, I know you’ll be back.

Because there are people who are here for you,

Always.

Because you are the one and only Kim Heechul,

I’ll hold back my tears and wait for your return with a smile.

Kim Heechul,

I promi5e to 13elieve.

Simply because you are the Kim Heechul I love.