JIHWAN'S P.O.V

It was sickening how perfect they were ... They shared the same birthday, the same blood type ... Hell they were even the same goddamn height ! So, who could blame them when they came to the other three, and explained that they were together, dating ... In love even. Nobody questioned it, in fact Hyunmin and Injoon had been waiting for them to come and tell them. Even Jay, the innocent maknae had been expecting it ... But that didn't mean it hurt any less. When they came to the table, holding hands and Karam proudly told the others "We're dating !" Hyunmin and Injoon had congratulated them and gotten up to give them both hugs ... Jay had just sat there in utter shock, fork in his mouth as he stared into Suhoon's eyes ... At first he had thought it was a joke, but then Mika confirmed it.

"We really love each other ... I hope you guys can accept this, nothing will change between any of us."

Of course, Karam had noticed that one of his two best friends had not gotten up and hugged him, so he turned his attention to the maknae and gave him a questioning look. "Jay ? What do you think about this ?" Hyunchul asked, his bright eyes meeting Jay's dull ones. Forcing a smile, Jay stood up and wrapped his arms tightly around Karam. "I think you two are perfect for each other !" He cheered happily, though on the inside his heart felt like it just shattered ... Maybe he should have told him that he liked him, maybe then he could be the one holding hands with him ... Maybe then he could be happily in love.

But no, he had to be a fool and hope that the other would notice his feelings, and possibly return them.

When Jay said that that were perfect for each other, Karam squeezed him tighter and Mika's lips turn up into a smile. Jay pulled away from his best friend and looked to Mika with a serious face, he stared straight into Mika's eyes. "Hyung ... I know everyone is really happy for you guys right now, but I just want to say ... Don't hurt Karam ! Make sure he knows that you love him and take good care of him !" Even though he was trying to be serious, a smile came upon his face when he actually wanted to curl up into a ball and cry.

He knew that Mika was going to take good care of Karam, he knew that their leader was never going to hurt Karam ... Jay knew that Mika was the perfect person for his best friend, and he also knew that Karam was the perfect person for Mika.

But that didn't change anything. It didn't change his feelings ... Even if they were sickly perfect for each other, Jay wanted nothing more then to pull apart their hands and press his lips to the leader's, right in front of everybody else. He wanted Mika to be his, not Karam's. Jihwan was aware that he had to get rid of these feelings now, because if he didn't it would just hurt more in the future ...

But how do you get rid of your feelings when you're completely and utterly in love with that person ? It was damn near impossible.

Jay stepped away from the couple and muttered something about going to his room. With his eyes never leaving the floor, the young boy made his way to his room, shut the door and fell face first into his fluffy bed. No tears fell out of his eyes, he wasn't going to be a big baby about it and cry ... No, that was a lie. He was going to cry, just when everybody else was asleep so that he couldn't and wouldn't get caught. 

A knock on his door brought him back to reality, quickly sitting back up and straightening up his appearance, Jay opened his mouth and told the person to come in ... However, he had been expecting to see Injoon come in to ask if he wanted to play a game or something, he was not expecting the dark haired leader that had caught his heart to come into the room. "Jihwan ?" Mika asked as he stepped into the room, a look of surprise came upon his face when he saw the younger sitting on the bed playing with the ears of a stuffed animal, but the surprise quickly disappeared and turned into worry.

"Are you okay ?" The older asked as he sat down on the edge of the bed, right in front of Jay. Not answering, the boy just stared at the stuffed rabbit that he was playing with not daring to look into the older's breath taking eyes.

"Jay, answer me. Are you okay ?" Jay wanted to say that he was far from okay, he wanted to throw his teddy at Mika's face and scream at him for being such an idiot and not seeing that the maknae had feelings for him, he wanted to throw a fit. But instead, Jay just lifted his head and stared past Mika, before placing a bright smile on his face ... "Of course I'm okay hyung ! I'm really happy for you and Karam ! I was just thinking. You don't need to worry about me." He chirped happily. Suhoon seemed to believe the act and smiled back, he patted the makane's head before saying something about being in the living room if he needed him. Watching as Mika left and closed the door, Jay fell back into his bed and stared at the roof, a tear or two escaping out of his eyes.

"No, I'm not okay Mika. My heart hurts a lot ... It feels like somebody reached into my chest and crushed it ... I'm in a lot of pain, hyung ... Can you make it go away ? Can you kiss the wound, and make it better ? Please Mika, the pain ... It's unbearable ... I just want it to go away."

SUHOON'S P.O.V

He knew Jay wasn't okay. The maknae's eyes weren't the same, they were distant and dull not bright and happy like they use to be. What had changed over the past ten minutes that Jay had suddenly become upset ? Was he not pleased that Mika and Karam were together ? Did he think that Mika was going to take away his best friend ? Did he think that Mika and Karam were going to leave him now that they were together ?

What on earth could possibly be wrong with the poor boy ?

So many questions were going through Suhoon's mind as he sat down on the couch with his arm around Hyunchul's waist. He was worried for Jay, he hoped that the bubbly, happy boy he knew and loved would come back. Suhoon saw Jay was a little brother, or a son even ... In fact in the early days Suhoon had been called the "Umma" of the group and Hyunmin had been the "Oppa" the other three would always joke around with that, leaving Mika defending himself that he was a male, so he shouldn't be called the mother. Of course, Suhoon lost this argument and was still called Umma, mostly by Hyunmin and Jay.

"Something on your mind ?" Karam asked softly, just then Mika had become aware of where he was. Finding that Karam had snuggled closer and now had his head on Suhoon's shoulder, the eldest relaxed a bit, pushing all the bad thought away and just letting his mind and heart be filled with Karam.

Of course, there was still that nagging thought about Jay, something told him to get up and leave Hyunchul, and just go straight for Jay's room. Even though the thought was troublesome, Suhoon ignored it. Closing his eyes, Suhoon opened his mouth to speak.

"It's nothing Karam, don't worry." As if his lover had been reading his mind, Karam sighed,

"If it's about Jay, I'm worried too." Suhoon just shook his head and sunk into the couch, not wanting to talk about it. He hated that he had no control over what was going on with the maknae, it upset him to see Jihwan like this.

'Jay ... You know you can tell me anything right ? We still have that friendship ... Don't we ?' The leader thought, slowly drifting into a deep slumber.

- - - - -

A / N : short first chapter, i know and i'm sorry. ):

next chapter will be longer, i promise !

hope you guys liked this chapter. c: