017

Just Give Me a Reason

Hongbin wasn’t going to keep her till her lips turned blue. She was holding it quite well as far as she was with him but he knew that she wasn’t going to hold it well any longer. He wanted to send her back to her warm haven but at the same time he wanted to keep her with him longer because of the fear that he couldn’t see her anymore.

She was rubbing her palms, hoping that the friction create heat to reduce the coldness on her cheeks. Gazing her for a while, he then opened his mouth. “Can I see you again?”

His voice caught her attention as she glanced at him. She then felt as if her bottom had frozen and glued to the ground when she shifted in her seat. “What do you mean?” A smile hung on her lips as she added. “It’s not like you’re any dangerous to me or I’m afraid of you. We’ll see each other again.”

“Really?” his facial expression brightened as she saw his full rows of teeth. That was the brightest smile he ever held on his face as far as she concerned.

She nodded eagerly, “We’re friend. Why can’t one friend meet his friend?”

He was happy to hear that from .

“If so, there is no reason I should keep you with me,” he then got up and turned around before he crouched down, showing her his back. Jooyoung held a blank stare on his back, lost. What was he doing?

“Hop on, I’m sending you home,” he said as if hearing her thoughts.

Surprise, she just stared at his back, making Hongbin to turn around to see her. “Hop on,” he offered.

“Why? I can walk.”

His facial expression changed instantly, right, he thought. She was not injured anymore, why did he think she wanted to get lifted by him? She wouldn’t like the idea after he messed up with the scene once. She probably had trauma associated with it.

“I forgot,” he answered, short but he thought of something quickly.

“Since I already offer, you should hop on,” he voiced. “So, I can get you home faster?”

She was still in a blank state before Hongbin mentioned a name that woke her up from the blurry situation. “Frankly, when I found you, Jaehwan was coming to get you.”

Getting up instantly, she got rush of adrenalin when reality started to set in. Jumping on his back, she hit him lightly on his shoulder. “Bring me home faster, I’ll close my eyes. Grandma’s going to kill me!”

He couldn’t help but to laugh secretly and adjusted her behind his back. Despite the cold night, he could still feel her warmth on his back. A smile stuck on his lips as he couldn’t hide his excitement for being able to get close to her warmth once again.

For a second, she thought a blast of wind hit on her face and felt something against her bottom. “You can open your eyes now,” said Hongbin. He pulled his hands away from her but she was still gripping tightly on him.

“Are we home?” she asked, eyes still shut tightly.

A smile still hung on his lips; both of them were already arrived at Jooyoung’s bedroom and were sitting on her bed. Jooyoung still refused to open her eyes and let him go. A part of him like how it was. She was on his back, conducting her warmth towards him but another part of him needed her to let her go, because he could sense someone was going for the door.

“Someone’s coming,” his voice sounded alerted.

Thrilled, she let go of her arms from him and found a soft material under her. She just realised that they already arrived in her room and quickly she got off the bed and got panicked. “Who’s coming?”

“Your grandmother,” he began to panic as well. He momentarily forgot that he was not human, even if Grandma lunged into the room at that exact moment, she couldn’t see him.

Jooyoung shot a shock look towards Hongbin and as quick as lightning, she pulled Hongbin on his arm, and violently pushed him under her bed, without thinking if she might cause bodily harm towards him.

Hongbin could feel the fear from her, and he couldn’t help but to be fear as well, and stuck himself under the bed. His ears then caught the sound of the door opening. From under the bed, he could see from the gap of her bed sheet, a pair of feet getting in to the room and he heard a conversation going on.

“You’re home?” Grandma asked Jooyoung, actually surprise to see her granddaughter in the room. She remembered Jaehwan told her that he would be spending more time with Jooyoung, so that reminded her to the open windows in Jooyoung’s room. Jooyoung might left the window opened before leaving the house.

Nodding eagerly, Jooyoung tried to act normal in front of Grandma but she knew she had failed when she saw the judging look from Grandma.

“I thought you would be home a little late? I didn’t see you around.”

Jooyoung lost the ability to speak all of sudden, she didn’t know how to response to Grandma. Jaehwan might make up stories to Grandma and she feared that one word from would ruin every turn of Jaehwan’s lies.

Grandma’s eyes noticed Jooyoung’s dirty jeans. “What were you doing with Jaehwan? Look at your trousers,” Grandma cringed to the sight. It looked like Jooyoung was playing with sand.

Noticing the dirt immediately, she tried to lightly pat on the dirty area to clean it but failed. She was still panic, every of her moves looked desperate and abnormal. Grandma noticed the unusual sight and she searched Jooyoung’s eyes. “Are you okay? Go take a shower. You don’t want to bring home the unseen force.”

“Yes,” Jooyoung looked at the floor. She already brought one without Grandma’s knowledge and she didn’t think he would leave her at this time around even with a bath.

Grandma still observed her from head to toe but she thought it was enough with the sudden interrogation. She didn’t think it was fair for Jooyoung to get question after the tiring night.

Grandma then left the room and Jooyoung quickly closed it and locked it tight. Turning around, leaning his back against the door, she released a breath of relief.

Hongbin came into her sight; he was sitting on the bed, looking at her with a pair of curious eyes. “What are you looking at? We almost get caught!” she then made a silent scream in her palms. Her heart was still beating fast and she didn’t know how to calm it down.

“You know what? Even if you don’t hide me, your grandmother still can’t see me,” he suggested.

Her eyes widened as the realisation just hit her.

“Are you sure?” she shot him a sceptical look. “Then why did you do what I ask?”

“You pushing me hard like there’s no tomorrow! How can I say no? In fact, you look so terrified! I can’t help but to feel as if we’re doomed as well!”

She pulled a sheepish look, but still she was not ready to face that Hongbin was standing beside her while Grandma lecturing her. Grandma would look crazy as she could only see and hear Jooyoung but not Hongbin.

“But still… We wouldn’t know,” Jooyoung didn’t want to give up.

Awkward silence then filled the atmosphere. Jooyoung was stuck on the door and Hongbin on the bed. Both had lost words to say and Hongbin thought it was enough for the night.

“We’ll see again,” Hongbin broke the silence. “Go take a shower.”

She nodded, and moved to the window, opening the way out to him. Even though she knew he could disappear from her eyes in a blink of an eye, she still preferred him to leave her in a human way.

Taking the hint, a smile broke on his lips and he exited the room from the window. Jooyoung waved him goodbye, hoping to see him again the next day. Moreover, she felt as if it was already a century she hadn’t gone to the lake with someone.

---

Jooyoung woke up early the next day. Unconsciously, she had melody of song play on her lips as she walked out of the house and stopped right in front of the front door. At the porch, she made a small exercise routine as her eyes caught the sunny and cloudless sky.

Still singing song, she bent forward and just after she stood up, Jaehwan’s frowning face was staring back at her. She moved backward instantly, almost falling to see him popped out of nowhere that morning.

“Good morning?” she sounded hesitant, but greeted him anyway.

“Where were you last night?” he shot her questions directly, without morning greeting or even a smile.

She chortled, as she hit the air, “It was fun last night, I was hitting around like cra–”

“Stop lying, I know you weren’t in the house,” he interrupted with a stern look. The smile on her face fade away slowly as she looked around, looking more suspicious.

“Answer me,” he forced her to look at him as he followed her gaze. “I know you didn’t even go to the toilet, you were just making excuses to leave.”

Blood draining from her face at his words. He knew it. He knew everything. He was just asking her questions that he already knew. The rest that were unseen were left for her to answer. She knew he was waiting for her to spill what exactly happen after the toilet incident.

“Shin Jooyoung,” he called, to wake her up. She disliked it when someone called her full name with that tone; it reminded her to when she would be scolded by her mother. Her mother would call her name with that tone if she was caught doing something she shouldn’t do.

She put on courage to look him into his eyes. He looked like he wanted to explode; she saw that he was holding on as much as he could. She never had seen him like this way before. So it was true, the brightest one was the one that should be careful around when provoked.

A defeated sigh escaped her lips. “I wasn’t feeling good. So, I decided to go home,” she answered while observing his facial expression. She hoped he would buy her lie, because she had more to sell.

His facial expression hadn’t change a bit. He looked as if he wanted to say something but he was waiting for the right moment. Perhaps he was waiting for her to add more to her lie?

“Okay, I’m sorry. I should have told you if I wasn’t feeling right so that you can bring me home?”

“I wouldn’t send you home even if you sick to death.”

She swallowed hard after hearing the harsh comeback from him.

There was a long pause before he leaned forward, closing the gap between them. “Don’t you know how dangerous the outside was last night?” he whispered. “You could be killed if you’re not careful enough!” he exploded all of sudden.

Jooyoung flinched. She made it. She asked for this.

He pinched the bridge of his nose as he moved away from her. He knew he was acting insane but she didn’t know how worried he was. How hard the night was when the scene of her walking down the path right before the ritual started kept flashing back in his mind.

Why it was hard for her to stay put with him and waited until the ritual ended?

Feeling guilty, she watched Jaehwan trying to calm himself down. “I’m sorry. I promise I won’t do it again it.” She regretted it instantly after saying the cliché sentence.

He glanced at her and the scary look he held had disappeared and replaced with a more softened and concern look. “I’m sorry, I don’t mean it but be honest with me,” he paused for a swallow. “You walked down the path right?”

She stared at him for a moment, taking the time to think. Did he see her last night? So this was what Hongbin tried to tell her. She swore she was running away as fast as she could as soon as her feet stepped out of the house.

“You saw me?” she asked with her heart beat faster every second.

“It was her,” he thought.

“I’m sorry,” she apologised once again making Jaehwan to look away frustrated. His mouth ached to tell her about why was it so dangerous for her to walk alone on the path, especially on a 14th day ritual but he knew she wouldn’t listen to him.

He knew how thick her wall was towards the belief but sometime, a man needs to see to believe.

---

That night, she opened her window. Leaning outside, her eyes caught Hongbin who was leaning his back against the wall. “Hongbin!” she called him, enthusiastic. Her mood was extremely bright that day that she couldn’t wait to see the day turned to dark. She had patiently waited for this moment.

After Jaehwan’s explosion, Jaehwan still couldn’t bring a smile on his face. Even though he said that he accepted her apology but he couldn’t bring to see her in the eyes afterward. He looked extremely disappointed and exhausted.

She should be worried of him right now but meeting Hongbin bet everything. Jaehwan didn’t know the biggest reason she left the house. She knew, he thought she hadn’t learnt the story of the 14th day ritual. She had learnt it, in fact she had learnt more than that. If the village needs a person to prove the story of escaping souls, she could offer herself. But for the time being, she liked it to keep it this way.

Seeing her friend –Hongbin secretly.

Hongbin shot her a shock look. Apparently, he was calculating if it was the right time to meet her outside her room but it seemed like she was more decisive than him. Pulling himself from the wall, he quickly walked to the window when she began to climb out the window.

Carefully, she helped her down and she safely landed on the ground. She then turned to beam at him and he looked away, feeling shy to her smile. He was not used to this side of her. He never imagined that both of them finally would get on a good term.

“To the lake?” she asked eagerly. She was filled with energy that night. Noticing that he was avoiding her gaze, she moved in front of him, trying to make eye contact but he kept avoiding.

“Lee Hongbin, are you going to be like this for the rest of the night?” Jooyoung jokingly put on a serious tone.

He heard the different tone and bravely looked her in the eyes. If his body could produce heat, his face would be the first place to get heated up quickly that night.

“Yes, to the lake,” he spoke. His answer put a smile on her face before she led the walk. She was walking finely in front of him, and seeing that gave him an odd feeling. She couldn’t walk properly when she was with him and he used to offer her to carry her but seeing her walk smoothly now invited funny feeling to him.

He hid his smile.

And he never felt more than alive tonight.

---

They were sitting under the starry night. Jooyoung was enjoying the smooth breeze blowing past her. It wasn’t really cold that night nor it was hot, it was the right temperature for her. Her eyes averted to the high areas behind the lake and her stomach doesn’t flip as she used to every time she laid her eyes on it.

Hongbin had been watching her the past few minutes. She seemed to immerse in her thought, swayed away from the reality to notice his gaze that could put a hole on her if it capable to do so. He hated to break her train of thought but he waited long enough to tell everything about him.

“I don’t know my real name,” he spoke, breaking the silence between them. His words caught her attention as she glanced at him who was sitting on her left. They weren’t sitting closely; one person could fit on the gap between them.

She shifted her seat to face him. He sounded as if he wanted to open up that night. Looking from the nice weather and temperature, she thought it was the best night to do so.

He glanced at her, his dimples shown under the moon light before he looked away and landed his gaze on the glistening lake’s surface. “I don’t know where I lived. How old I was. I don’t know my parents… Even if I have one… What I did for living or…” he paused as he pressed his lip tight.

Jooyoung watched him silently and saw how hard it was for him. She decided to be a listener that night, not wanting to interrupt him. It wasn’t easy to finally being able to speak to someone after how long he had it shoved in the back of his mind.

“I don’t know how I died… I can’t remember a thing from my past life,” he spoke, feeling the lump in his throat. He couldn’t feel the pain inflicted on him but once he think of something sad, it hurt so much. He couldn’t even cry out tears.

“Lee Hongbin is the name given to me by a nice person,” he continued as the face of the spirit of an oak tree popped in his mind. He continued telling her about how everything was unfair when he first found that he was living in a different world.

The frustration that he interpreted as punishment to him, everything he told it to her.

Never once, Jooyoung doubted the truth behind his tales. She was paying every attention she could to him and at times, she couldn’t help but to be able visualising his struggle that few tears streamed down her cheeks and there was also the time she laughed along when he told story of him terrorizing the ungrateful villagers.

He wasn’t connecting eyes with her the whole time he told the story of his life but he suddenly turned his head, facing her. Her eyes were bloodshot after the endless tears.

“The night you came in my life was the turning point of my life,” he said, holding a gaze on her. She returned him the same gaze as she admired his pitch black eyes.

“I never thought I will be able to see someone that can see… listen… and touch me.” He reached for her hand as soon as he said that as he pulled her hand towards his face. Opening her palm, he placed her palm towards his cheek as he shut his eyes, cherishing the moment.

She couldn’t produce a word as she watched him in stun. Her eyes took every detail his face made when he was pressing her palm towards her cheek. It was a weird feeling to her but she didn’t even pull her hand away nor did she get angry to him for doing absurd thing.

She just let him.

“I thought you’re a manipulative soul. I tried to stop myself from seeing you but at the end of the day I found myself walking back to you.”

Her eyes moved from his face down to her hand that was wrapped securely in his hand. She still couldn’t produce a word.

“And I can’t help but to get addicted to your warmness.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N; A long chapter! Anw, GUYS IT’S HANIKEN! I was going to update this chapter when all of sudden my cell phone notified me about rovix’s tweet and baam! It’s Haniken. I’m so excited ^-^

@Aida_Rusdi Thank you! Don’t stop shipping and loving this fic! ^o^

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hellomiraa
I promise the next chapter tonight. This chap is quite hard for me to write. I'm lost atm

Comments

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chocolate
#1
Chapter 21: Nice story. Hope there is a sequel.

By the way, how did Jaehwan knew Hongbin's past? And her new roommate is also a lost and restless soul?
hanistar99 #2
Chapter 21: nice story author-nim...successful in making me crying in silent
'she'?? hoping you change into 'he'
keybha #3
Chapter 21: already an end huhu! anyway i loved this story so much <3 good luck
Aida_Rusdi
#4
Chapter 21: If you wanna know, I really love this story. So sad till I cried in silent. Hoping for the best for you!
HyoMulberry #5
Chapter 21: this's so good. Thanks for writing it beautifully! <333
mechyni #6
Chapter 21: this story is so good!! i dont expect jaehwan can see hongbin too. and hongbin's life.. T.T
the ending can be new story, right? so sequel? hehehe
orionbaozi
#7
wow that was really good and i really enjoyed this story
the ending was pretty bitter sweet, even i secretly hope magically hongbin will alive again
good job authornim

sequel maybe ? :p
ediblep4nts
#8
Chapter 21: Ughhh noooo it's over already D: this is seriously one of my favorite stories like it was so well written and the characters were so relatable. It would be super awesome if you would consider writing a sequel! ^_^
Wondervixx
#9
Chapter 21: Noooooo please don't let it end here!!