Story Title: 3/5.

I can't really fault the title. The meaning relates to the story perfectly but I personally feel as though it could be a little more imaginative. For a simple one shot though, I think the title is fine.

Foreword & Description: 2/5.

Okay so the foreword really tells us nothing about the story. Sure there is a summary which quickly wraps it up, but the description also doesn't tell us a lot. Personally, I feel that a well done description can really attract readers to a story, but this one was okay; it's nice that you included warnings to avoid any uncomfortability.

Graphics: 4/5.

The poster is simple, yet attractive. I like it!

Plot and originality: 28/40.

Okay so I have read MANY stories that have one-sided love between idols and so for me, this wasn't the most original thing i'd ever read. However, in most of the stories I have read, the out-come usually ends with the two idols falling happily in love and blah blah blah, so predictable. I really liked that Ren did not find out about JR's infactuation in this story, it's a really one sided love and whilst reading, I could really imagine how JR's character would be feeling and his confusion. I also love the personal touches about Ren smelling like flowers; I thought it was really sweet.

Characterization: 7/10.

So I don't usually read NU'EST stories, but I got a real feel for JR's character in this one shot, and I think he was portrayed wonderfully. Of course, there is much room for character description if this story was to progress into, say a sequel? But otherwise, as a short one-shot, we can easily tell from your writing that JR's character is unsure about his feelings, and perhaps almost desperate for Ren to feel the same.

Grammar and spelling: 15/20.

Okay so as far as I can see, there isn't any spelling mistakes that have caught my attention dramatically and all the grammar seems pretty much perfect. The reason points are knocked, is because there were some parts which confused me a little. For example, "Sleep." Hands never stop moving." I understood this, but I feel it would have flowed better if you had said, "Sleep." He whispered; his hands still moving." Or, "Sleep." He continued." The other thing, is there is some use of "him" which can be confusing sometimes, if used too much. As an alternative, you could say things like, 'the younger', 'the blonde/dark haired boy' or simply a name. I usually don't like stories that sneak in Korean, but the honorifics were fine in this.. (Ren-ah. Minki-nim.)

Organization: 5/5.

I feel like you knew how to start and end this story before you started writing. It's always a good thing to see, since there's no awkward inbetween.

Overall Enjoyment: 3/5.

Personally, I found this story difficult to read. I didn't get bored and I really liked the outcome, but the simply reason I found it difficult is because I have never read a NU'EST story before. I would definitely recommend this to NU'EST fans though, it's short, sweet and it's a nice build up for introducing people to NU'EST fics; I feel that after reading this one-shot, I would take more interest in NU'EST stories in the future.

Flow of story: 3/5.

Okay so the story all flows fine with the respect from start to finish, but some bits inbetween confused me slightly. In one scene, we see JR on the floor, before reaching out to Ren. "He sighed softly, hands covering his face as the footsteps draw away, body curled on the ground" This is fine, until you say that Ren is hugging JR. The imagery was a little distorted for me since I have imagined JR laying face down, and so I found it hard to picture Ren's position. "he could feel Ren's hand wrapped around his fists, before he came crashing into his embrace." It could be potentionally the way I read it, but I couldn't work out if Ren had pulled JR up from the floor, or just joined him down there.. Ignoring this though, the story has an easy flow and is not hard to follow. 

Overall score: 70/100.

Considering the length, I enjoyed this one-shot. It's short, sweet and a pleasure to review. If there was a sequel, I'd be most happy to read and I wish you luck with further writing. If you have any questions ect, feel free to ask; I'd be happy to help! :)

By: Exotic_sarang / 04 June 2014 
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