I stared at him. He was sitting on his bed, writing in his song book, listening to music — like he did every night, nothing special. I was standing in the door way, contemplating my next move. I needed to talk to him, I had to tell him. But, I should probably figure out what the hell I want to tell him first. When he looked up at me, I suddenly felt guilty. All I did was stand there and look at him, blinking.

“Are you okay Kibum?” I looked down at the ground, and back to his general direction, looking more over his shoulder than at him. I nodded at him stiffly.

"Are you sure? You don’t look so hot," he said, concerned.

"I’ve just got some things on my mind I wanted to talk to you about," I said quietly, finally looking at him.

“Come here then,” he said motioning me over as he sat up to make room for me on the bed, pulling out his headphones and placing his note book aside.

“Jjong…” I said, walking over to him, “can we pretend for a moment,” i paused to sit down, putting a little distance between us, “that we lived an alternate life?” he looked at me with confusedly, I moved a little closer to him.

“What do you mean?”

“Well in this life, we aren’t idols, and we don’t have screaming fans and the media breathing down our necks all the time.” he nodded, sliding a little closer to me, nodded his head for me to continue, “We aren’t best friends either, but we aren’t strangers. In this world, racism, ism, homophobia and prejudice doesn’t exist, because everyone is happy with themselves.” He swallowed before he asked his next question.

“And why are we in this world?” I moved myself closer to him until our shoulders touched, he moved closer to me, until our noses were practically touching, my breathing uneven.

“So,” i said, searching his eyes for the answer to my unspoken question,”So, I can do this…”