“Baby!! Hurry and wake up dear!”

“YAH LEEE BYUUNG HUUNNIEE!!”

 

ljoe groaned as he rubs his heavy eyelids, pulling chunji into his arms. Squishing the boy’s face on his chest as he adjusted his body and tried to sleep again. Chunji immediately struggled free and pushed the smaller red head away.  Rubbing his sore neck, silently growling.

 

 

“baby……”

“wake up…. Im  really hungry. Aiing?”

 

Smiling bright byunghun brought his heavy body up and ruffled chunji’s hair as he slightly stumbles to the kitchen. Turning the tv on the way he changed the channel to chanhee’s favorite channel. Loud background music filled the air as chunji ran to the front when he tripped and fell on his hip.

 

“oww…. Sobs.. oww…owwww!!!!”

“bbyung… wuu it hurts..”

“ aigoo I told you right?! Don’t run channi, aishh see this scratch on your hand”

“wuuu…. It.. hurts..”

“okay..its okay.. don’t cry”

 

 

Byunghun slowly wrapped the scratch and wiped away the pouring tears from chunji’s cheeks. Then pulling chunji into a tight hug, somehow a drop of tear spilled from the brim of his eyes. Immediately wiping it away ljoe cupped chunji’s face and spoke.

 

 

“hurry and watch your cartoon okay. Im gonna make you some sweet pancakes alright”

“ arasso. Yay, spongebob! And… sweet pancakes”

“my byunggie is the best!”

 

 

A man with a mind of a 10 year old child. Chunji was perfectly grown, into this beautiful handsome man. But his mind, judgments could never exceed the age of ten.

 

“channie … what did I say?”

“ hmmph… okay… I’ll eat slower. Bbut im so hungry byunggie!”

“no.. eat slowly”

 

 

Sobbing the boy slowed down his spoon, eating nice and proper.  Occasionally meeting eyes with ljoe and smiling bright. All byunghun could do was smile back, pinch chunji’s cheeks or give the elder a warm hug. That was all that he could do, no more passionate kisses or even lovely mischievous love bites.

 

But he was content, as long as chunji was safe beside him. He could live with only that. Even when there are days where byunghun would lose temper and annoyance would challenge the limits of his patience, byunghun could never walk out of the door.

 

His love, concerns caged him tight inside the house as chunji could never go out. The boy was practically traumatized to his bones whenever he sees moving vehicles. And certainly it would affect the boy greatly. And the sight of chanhee crawling silently to the corners and shaking definitely broke ljoe’s heart.

 

 

“channie yah! Can you hear me in the shower??”

“ uhmmm yeah”

“hurry and shower alright! Im going out for a while to do some work alright”

“I’ll be back before eight okay!”

 

 

He was late for his appointment, real late that byunghun forgot to make certain that chunji had heard him.

Time sped through, as ljoe hurried home. The traffic jam was certainly a huge delay to his 30 minutes trip back. His heart was uneasy, it started to feel rather foul the moment after he realized the amount of calls he had dialed to reach home was unsuccessful. Each and every call rang for a moment and went straight to voicemail.

 

 

 

“channie yah… why aren’t you picking up your phone?!”

 

 

Finally arriving, the boy ran up only to see the doors opened wide. Byunghun was speechless; silently he went into the house chewing his own lips. Curbing the terror in his eyes from bursting and causing him to hyperventilate.

 

 

“c..cchanie? “

“LEE CHAN HEE?!!”

 

 

Practically running to each and every room, byunghun knew well that the house was empty. But his gut was just too twisted with anxieties that if possible he would recheck each room at least four times.

He can’t bear with the fact that chunji had went out. All alone and clueless, probably freezing in the corner of some random alley. Worst was that ljoe could hear chunji’s frail cries for his name.

 

 

“cc…han… hee…”

But he needed to be strong. Instantly pulling himself together, ljoe called everyone he knew and rushed outside. His eyes scanning and desperately searching for chunji in each and every crooks of the street. Tripping on pebbles and colliding shoulders as the red head kept walking in a speedy pace.

 

 

Searching in arcades and toy stores and slowly getting clues of where chanhee could be, the cold air slamming across byunghun’s cheeks made it so much harder for him to contain the tears. When it spilled and rained down his face as he stopped for a moment, completely overwhelmed. He was finally beaten down and lost.

 

 

“where are you… lee chanhee..”

“please lord let me find him. He.. he couldn’t… there is nothing that he could do without me”

“ ugh.. please… come back. Cc….chunji..”

 

 

Ljoe’s eyes completely blurred from all the flooding tears but he still moved on, trembling on each steps when a cold hand grabbed his ankle. Alarmed the red head almost screamed out loud when the tears stopped and his face crumpled.

 

 

“bbyun…ngieee…. Ugh… byung hun… byung.. arghhh”

 

 

His nightmare was perfectly accurate. Chanhee was freezing, alone by the street. Wearing only one piece of shirt and shorts, the boy was hugging his own knees sitting beside a streetlamp. Face stained with dirt and eyes swollen…..

 

 

“oh my god… chunji…”

“thank god… thank god… oh lord wha… what are you doing here?!!”

“y..yyou’re freezing… come on… lets go home”

 

 

Trying to lift chunji up, byunghun realized that he was just as drained. Even his own hands were trembling where in the world would he have the strength to bring the larger boy home. His strength was completely eaten away by his own fears and desperation. Stripping off his jackets layer by layer and placing it on chanhee as he too sat down and pulled his love close, still trembling badly.

He was just as hopeless without chunji…….. Reality was it was byunghun that could not live without chanhee.

 

 

“pabbo ya.. why in the world would you come out like this channie?!”

“ i.. thought… yyo..you left. Byunngie.. was gone when I went out of the shower and..and..”

“ I don’t know what to do… i.. just… uggh…..i was..”

“scared”

“wuarghhh……!!”

 

 

Completely broken down chunji was screaming his tears away as he pulled ljoe close,r who was apparently just as broken.

 

 

“dd…don’t leave me… byunggie”

 

 

With those words chanhee leaned his head on byung’s chest slowly drifting to sleep. Hearing it lee byunghun could stop the wail and tears from flowing free. His chest was about to explode with all those pain and sorrow, he wanted the old chunji back.

 

The one that once loved him more, the one who once treated him even kinder and the one who was supposed to be protecting him. But chunji was gone, his old love was completely gone and he knew it better that anyone.

 

 

“even after all this time… god chunji”

“how could you say the same things…”

“lets stay here for a while… lets just be like this for a while”

 

 

 

It has been a year. Since they broke up and the tragedy happened. Chunji who was devastated drove while being completely drunk. Calling byunghun at the same moment, when the car collided with a truck and ljoe heard every cripple sound and faint screams and even gasp. The last thing he heard was…

don’t leave me….