A/N Hello guys, this is the second part of a double update chapter, so please don't get confused and read Part I first ;u;

Taehyung was humming some cheesy songs and practically glowing at work the following day, not looking sorry that he was late for almost an hour. But the boss had never seen him smile like this, so he just sighed at the energetic boy, reminiscing about the times he was the same.

At 3pm it started raining heavily, one of the heaviest rains they’ve had in years. But it was spring so they weren’t so surprised. Taehyung was wondering whether Hoseok had an umbrella or not, because it didn’t seem it would stop anytime soon, so he finished his work quickly and ran to the place they usually meet before going to Hoseok’s apartment. But strangely Hoseok wasn’t there. Taehyung rang him few times, but since nobody answered, he thought Hoseok was held back at work and decided to wait. The rain was unusually cold, but Taehyung was happy so he didn’t mind much. An hour and something later he thought that he should probably stop waiting and just go to his apartment before he freezes to death. It wasn’t unusual for Hoseok to be made to do some extra work so maybe he won’t make it early tonight. As he walked there, still humming, his phone rang and a big smile immediately appeared on his face.

“Hobi!” he exclaimed a bit louder than needed. He was happy to hear his voice. But there was silence for a while and his smile fell as he remembered the last time the same thing happened. What was this sudden uneasy feeling?

“Taehyung, I can’t meet you tonight because I’m out with some friends, so don’t go to my apartment.” Taehyung didn’t know what to say, since Hoseok never once went out this late with his friends for the last nine months. The following words are those he wished he never heard.

“Let’s take a break. You’re still very young and the future is in front of you, I’m sure that you deserve to find someone who would treat you better than me. I think it would be better for you if you found someone else who would appreciate you more.” Taehyung froze. He was waiting for Hoseok to burst out laughing and tell him this is a bad pre April fools day joke, but it didn’t happen. Again with the excuse of Taehyung being too young.

“Hobi? Did something happen? Did I make you mad? Please, I’ll apologize but don’t such scary words again..” Taehyung pleaded with a shaking voice, still waiting for Hoseok to laugh.
“Taehyung, let’s just stop and not make it harder for both of us. I know you will forget me quickly, just go meet somebody else. I’m sorry Taehyung.” Hoseok said with a cold voice he never, ever used before, with a voice that made Taehyung unable to even scream or cry or grasp what was happening. After last night, where he gave all of himself to Jung Hoseok? After he did everything he could and they were together, not wanting to separate just few hours ago? Hoseok of course never picked up again and there was no one waiting for him at his apartment. “You’re probably just confused with your own feelings.” Taehyung started crying, his tears mixing up with the raindrops that were already running down his face.

“It was spring, yet the rain felt piercingly cold against his skin, as if it was burning small holes in it. One stupid phone call made him completely crumble and stop thinking rationally. But he kept walking and walking aimlessly without looking at what was in front of him, his mind subconsciously following the city lights during this unnaturally freezing night. Or was it just the words he said that were non-stop echoing in his mind the ones that made him shiver and forget to breathe every now and then? but it was cold. Or was it the blank look in the other’s eyes while he said those words as if it was the easiest thing to say then? He didn’t know, but it was cold.”

How could this happen without any warning, without any rational explanation? The person who he loved the most, who he was sure loved him just as much, who Taehyung was sure he can’t live without suddenly brush him off because of stupid reason like this, as if he was no one important.

The rain kept mercilessly soak through his clothes, the cold reaching every bone in his body as he walked towards his dorm, using all of his power to call Hoseok again, and again, and again. It was spring, yet he felt colder than any other winter he had experienced. When was the last time he cried like this? It wasn’t fair.

Hoseok never picked his phone and Taehyung knew that none of this is a joke and the cold voice that he thought Hoseok, the sun-like existence that Jung Hoseok was, wasn’t capable of producing was all targeted towards him. Hoseok didn’t need him anymore.  Taehyung didn’t mind the stares he was getting because of the loud sobs that came out his throat, he walked to his room until his feet stopped supporting him and he collapsed with his wet clothes and fell asleep with a high fever.

--

The next week of Kim Taehyung’s life was an absolute blur. He was way too sick to attend classes and lucky for him, the cold  concealed the rest of the pain he felt, somewhere deeper in his chest.

The words of the person he spend the best and most important nine months of his life kept appearing and reappearing over and over in front of his face, and damn it, it never hurt less than the previous time, the disappointment of every unanswered phone call never ceased; the pain that made him feel like suffocating and the tears that always came unwanted and uninvited never left him.

On the eight day of drugging himself with antibiotics and struggling to do anything else, Taehyung wanted to get out of his room before he really loses his mind. He didn’t know where he was going, probably to the café he worked to try and explain himself and get himself fired or to his favorite music shop that was one of the places he would usually go if he felt lost. He allowed his legs to take him anywhere but his dorm.

Of course.

Of course he ended up in front of Hoseoks apartment, of course his mind always ended up there. Where he considered to be his true home, with the person who he thought was his closest. He suddenly felt anger taking over his thoughts. He deserved to get explanations, nine months weren’t nothing and he deserved more than to be brushed off with just a stupid phone call. He stomped towards Hoseok’s room and halted a bit before looking at the place where the key usually was. What if the key wasn’t there? What would he do then? What if Hoseok never wanted Taehyung to see him again? He stood there for some good ten minutes before reaching out his hand and taking of one sneaker of its place. There was a small thud and Taehyung’s heart skipped a beat when he saw the little silver key on the floor. His hands trembled while trying to unlock the door, his palms were sweating and his mind was blurry. But what he saw inside made him want to never have come here to check. It was empty, Hoseok’s belongings gone, it was as if no one lived here before and Taehyung fell on his knees. So it was all over…

He didn’t want to cry anymore, he didn’t have the power to so he just stood up and almost left, probably forever, before seeing a little piece of paper in the shoe where the key was. The handwriting was painfully familiar to Taehyung and by this time he didn’t care if the whole world saw him pathetically crying his eyes out in front of someone else’s front door.


“Taehyung… I don’t think this note will ever reach you, but don’t blame me for having some kind of a selfish hope that you might look for me after everything I’m about to do to you. You know about the changes that we talked about when I asked you about what would you do when you graduate? I’m sorry Tae, but there are some changes that really need to happen in my life. My mom really needs some help so I’m going back to Gwangju for the time being to be with her. I finally escaped that hell of a job didn’t I, haha @-@ You’re probably cursing me or even hating me right now and I can’t blame you, because I know I deserve it. But Taejyung, you have always been so kind to me I knew that if  I told you all of this you would decide to wait for me to return and I will never forgive myself if I made you waste your youth waiting for someone like me. I don’t know when will I be back or will I ever be back, so after thinking for a long tme I decided that I must act like an adult for once and make the right choice.. I still wonder if this  really is the right choice even now, while writing this useless note, but I know thing can’t continue like this. I won’t ask you to forgive me about the harsh words I might use or all the lies I might to tell you, but please Tae, know that every single time I’ve said that  I love you I’ve meant it with all my heart, because if it wasn’t for you I will probably not be alive by now.. even though I don’t have the right to be saying those words I’ve made you despise me.. Live well Taehyung and if you can, forget about me..”

The note looked unfinished, as if Hoseok couldn’t continue write anymore and the tear stains were so obviously there. Taehyung was shaking, but he folded the little note and brought it close to his chest. He wiped off his tears and stood up.

“But he was going to show him exactly how convincing a nineteen year old boy could be and how something as stupid as few years apart wasn’t going to completely break what was built during those nine months. But even if it did so what! He would just start all over again and build it until he finally reaches the point of Jung Hoseoks mind and completely erase every reason he had to doubt his love ever again.”

If Jung Hoseok thought that Taehyung would give up and throw away everything they built for the last year with such a pathetic note as an excuse he was dead wrong. Taehyung was really about to show Hoseok exactly how much he loved him and how much some mere distance wasn’t going to be an obstacle. The next morning he took the first train to Gwangju. It was the most spontaneous and probably ridiculous thing he had done, but he never felt more sure about his actions.

 

A/N I think this was the biggest challenge of my life >->o I cried and wanted to yell at something while writing this but i really don't regret spending so much time on it, because frankly it was an experience to me. Although i'm really new to angst i hope i wasn't very cringable ;u;

Thank you for reading ♥