Once upon a time... Wait a second, this isn't a fairy tale. Let me begin on an other way.

Mary Fisher is a British kpop fan and she... nope I think I should change her name and where she is from, but if I change where she's from, am I also going to offend British people? Okay let her stay British... or maybe British-American? Never mind. OKAY BACK TO THE STORY.

Jane Baker is a British-American kpop fan and she is a big fan of B.A.P.

Her favourite member is Yongguk, because she likes his deep voice and the way he raps.

She is in South Korea and is going to a B.A.P. concert.

She had never been to a kpop concert before, only to a British Boyband's concert. 

I wonder which British Boyband.

The heck? I'm the author. The British Boyband is Westlife. Yup, I kind of like them. They are better than Justin Bieber and I dunno if theyre better than One Direction. You can discuss in the comments about it.

Okay, I'll continue the story without more stupid comments... or I can try.

Okay, she is at the concert.

She fangirls together with the other audience.

Audience? What the... ehem... back to the story.

To see the members with her own eyes in real life is beautiful.

And when Yongguk took his shirt off, her nose started to bleed extremely.

And my nose starts bleeding too, by imagining Yongguk shirtless. I wouldn't mind if he was in a K-drama version of Free! Iwatobi Swim Club... Back to the story. But I wonder how a k-drama version of Free! Iwatobi Swin Club would be, I guess a lot of sixpack-loving girls would love to watch it, including me.

When the concert was finished, she went home and suddenly wished that she would meet him and also be together with him forever.

She went to her computer and went on Tumblr to blog about it.

And then she saw a Tumblr post with this picture.

After that she wished that she was a water bottle.

The heck is this kind of story I'm writing... back to the story.

Instead of becoming a doctor like some of the kdrama guys, she wants now to become a water bottle.

"If I become a waterbottle then Yongguk is going to drink of me." She yells so loud that her neighbors hear her.

Then she goes to sleep.

Why go to sleep... back to the story.

 

The next day she wakes up and goes to the grocery store to buy a bottle of water, just so that she can learn to be one.

When she opens the bottle, the genie from the bottle comes out.

She thinks the genie form the bottle reminds her of someone.

The genie has a feminine, asian look, has long, black hair and her clothes and her hat looks like the clothes that Girl's Generation have been wearing in a MV.

"I'm genie for your wish, girl." the genie says.

"Are you a genie that makes dreams go true?" Mary... I mean... Jane asks.

"Of course, because I'm genie for your dream, girl." Genie answers.

"And do you also come with three wishes?" Jane asks.

"Of course I do, girl." Genie says.

"Why do you say "girl" in the end of every sentences?" Jane asks.

"I don't even know, girl. Maybe it is because I'm born this way, girl."  Genie answers.

Jane just stands silent for a moment.

"Okay...?" She then says.

"Well, what is your first wish?" Genie asks.

"I wish that I was Yongguk's water bottle." She answers excited.

Genie's legs start SHINeeng... see what I did there? BACK TO THE STORY

Okay, her legs start shining and then she asks "Well... are you sure that you want to be that, girl?"

"Yes, I'm pretty sure." 

"Okay then, girl." She says and suddenly Jane teleports and turns into a water bottle.

She is at another place now, which she doesn't know.

There are many robes, microphones and stuff.

She can't move and tries to talk too.

"What is this? Where am I?" She says to herself.

Suddenly Genie appears again.

"Now your wish has come true, girl."  Genie says.

"Really?" Jane says. "Thank you so much." she starts tearing up.

"Yes, and now you should wait for him to drink of you, girl." 

"Oh my goodness, I'm not really ready, I wonder if it will hurt." 

"That's what I said too once, girl. Before I started being a genie, girl." 

"How did you become a genie?" Jane asks.

"That is a long story, girl. I live at planet called Place Ali SNSD, that is a bit Arabian styled, but really girly, girl. I'm a kind of alien, but I'm also a human, a wish, imagination,  a dream, a day, a night, a poop, a diarrhea and a feeling, girl." She tries to explain.

"What do you mean by that, Genie?" Jane interupts.

"I have no idea what it means, it maybe just means that all cows love dancing to Rick Roll, girl." She answers and then says angry: "Now listen to the rest, if you want to know how I became a genie, girl."

Then she keeps explaining.

"Some creatures from Place Ali SNSD can become belly dancers, members of APSNSD girl groups, flying carpet makers etc... and then there are the genies that you have to work really hard for to become, girl. You have to make a fellow creatures 100 wishes come true, remember the names of all the members of SNSD and know the full lyrics of Genie, girl. That's my story, girl."

"That was interesting to get to know, but I can't wait for Yongguk to put his lips on the top of me." She says REALLY excited.

Why did I write REALLY with big letters? BACK TO THE... Wait a second, she is waiting for a really long time for him. I'll just be rushing with the story.

Yongguk is finally coming.

Jane is screaming inside her head and the water inside her shakes.

"I'm thirsty." He says and ily rubs his lips.

Author is getting nosebleed

"Drink me." She wants to say, but she doesn't want to scare him.

Then Yongguk takes the bottle.

Jane blushes as he takes the lid of.

Then he puts his lips on her head.

Her heart starts beating fast and she blushes.

He starts drinking the water inside her.

She thinks it feels like someone is kissing her on her forehead.

He then throws the bottle away.

Most of Jane's bones break because of how hard he threw her.

He rubs his lips again and then leaves.

Should I M-rate the story, because of how wrong some of these sound? Back to the story.

Genie goes over to the almost broken bottle.

"Are you okay, girl?" Genie asks her worried.

"He drank of me." She yells and smiles.

 

"Do you have a second wish, girl?" Genie asks and turns her back into a human.

"I want to know what the EXO members ideal types are." she says.

"Okay, girl." She says and then she gives her a magic giant Ipad where all the EXO members are on a screen and telling it.

"My ideal type is a girl that likes calling me Daddy Ho." Suho says.

"My idealtype is a girl, that wears eyeliner and likes eating bacon. Because it turns me on, when a girl eats bacon. I imagine she is eating me" Baekhyun says and bites his lips.

"My ideal type is a girl, who smiles 24/7, also at funerals." Chanyeol says.

"My ideal type is a girl, that has y eyebrows." D.O. says.

"My ideal type is a girl, that likes touching my s." Kai says.

What the heck? BACK TO THE STORY.

"My ideal type is a girl, that is less cuter than I." Luhan says.

"Luhan is lying. He likes me." Sehun says.

"My ideal type is a girl that likes dragons." Kris says.

"A girl that has baozi buttcheeks." Xiumin says.

"A girl, that looks like a panda." Tao says.

"A girl, that is good at twerking." Chen says.

"I only like unicorns and I wanna marry a unicorn." Lay says.

Then the screen turns off.

"Well, girl... that was it, girl." Genie says.

"So there is only one left, but I don't what to wish for." she says.

"You can wish for a lot of stuff, girl. Like you could wish that I was a normal human being and not a genie, girl."

"No, I think my last wish should be to see my mom in heaven." She says and cries a bit.

Genie starts crying more.

"Why are you crying, Genie?"

"What if I told you that I'm actually your mom?" Genie says.

WHAT A PLOT TWIST... BACK TO THE STORY.

"MOM?" She yells.

"Yes, sweetie. I'm not in heaven. I became an alien thing, because I didn't die. I was just in a coma for a long time and I still am. I thought that if I became a genie, I would make you wish that I wasn't in a coma any longer. But you just cared about these k-pop boys and not about your own mother."

"But... Mom!" She says.

"I'm sorry, but you have gotten your three wishes and I have to go back to Place Ali SNSD, and try to become a human being again. And becoming a human being is really hard. Bye, girl."

She starts to disappear.

Then Jane sits down and cries.

"WHY?????"

THE END

Why did it end like that? This story makes no sense.

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Well... long time ago since I updated a chapter here.