This is weak...but I did try my best^^

February has never been this cold for EunKyung now that Kyuhyun was bidding his farewell to her. February 3 and tomorrow he will be leaving. She wouldn't even get to see him on White Day. She held his shirt tightly as he hugged her.

"Don't worry too much. I'll be back next year." he kissed her forehead.

She looked up to him and saw the bright smile he doesn't really give away that easily. She always calls him as the "old man Cho" for being too serious in life. But now, he was smiling like this. Cho Kyuhyun had been with her since elementary. Growing up together, he ended up being her first boyfriend. And her most loved person.

"It's hard living in the west, just stay here." she pleaded.

She burried her face on his chest and smelled his scent. She loved that scent because it was Kyuhyun. "What if you find another woman?" she mumbled.

His laughter filled her ears as he tousled her hair. "I will find another woman."

"Mwo?!" she pushed him away and frowned. "We're still together and you're telling me your plans?! You're really--" she took the pillow on his bed and threw it at him.

"Yah, yah, don't be angry...I'm just kidding." He reached out to her, still laughing. "Of course I will find another woman, but I will only love you. Are you telling me that I will only be seeing men abroad? That's hilarious!"

She pouted and pushed his hand away. "If it's not your birthday, I'd rather break up with you!" She went to the door.

"Old woman Shin, don't speak like that. You know how much I love you."

Those words of love that came from his mouth made her heart skip a beat. No matter how angry she was, he never failed to make her smile with those words. He held her hand. "Eun Kyung~ah, I shall love you forever. You know that right?" He took her hand to his lips and placed a soft kiss on the back of her hand. "Even if I want to stay, I have to go."

"Arasso, stop being like this." she patted his head. "I have to go now. It's late."

"Ne." he said, but locked his door. "Give me a kiss." he pointed to his lips.

"Aniya! My first kiss will be for my husband."

"Come on, just give me one before I go." he closed his eyes and pouted. "Shin Eun Kyung, if you don't give me one, you'll regret it forever. I'll give you ten seconds. Ten..."

She stood there watching him. He will give up anyway. He was never persistent. She smiled and stared at his face. Tears started to form in her eyes...tonight, she saw her Kyuhyun smile again, she saw him being this type of fool. These things were never seen often by other people. Just her, his Eun Kyung, saw these.

"Still not moving?" He opened his left eye. "Two seconds."

She crossed her hands over her chest. "Aniyo."

"Two."

"Stop counting."

"One."

"You won't have a--"

He grabbed her waist and claimed her lips. It was her first kiss. And it was beautiful. She closed her eyes and realized how much she wanted this. He probably knew it even before she did. A sigh escaped from her lips as she reached out to pull his head closer.

Cho Kyuhyun.

Her Kyuhyun.

When they separated, she felt the heat on her cheeks when she saw him grin. "You liked it."

She can't speak.

"Saranghae, Eun Kyung~ah..." he stooped down and gave her a peck. "Answer me..."

"S...S--saranghae..." she removed her eyes away from his face and blushed madly.

"Neomu kyeowo." he pinched her cheeks and opened the door. "Let's go."

Holding her hand, he took her home. And she was never that happy until that night.

"My Eun-Kyung, how are you? Do you like my blond hair? I'm sleepy but I want to call you. I can't reach your phone so I just sent this video. Bogoshipoyo..."

"Lady Shin! It's your prince Cho Kyuhyun. I performed on stage earlier. Can you imagine it? I sang in front of many people. HAHA! Saranghae!"

"Eun Kyung~ah, look behind me. John, Philip, Ryan, and my woman, Mika. We're at New York, for my farewell party. Bogoshipo...I want to see you, I want to hear your voice again. I can't wait..I will go home soon. Saranghae!"

Now, it's almost a year. In three days, she will see him again. She tried to call him but he never answered her calls. Maybe he was always busy. "I'm sorry, I wasn't able to pick up. Don't call me, the rate is too high." He usually sends her a message like this.

Sometimes, she suspected him for having another woman. Specially that Mika. Before she really thought that she was his other woman. But receiving his letters and his video messages, he eased those suspicions easily. His words fed her loneliness, he sends her gifts or post cards, flowers. He never missed a single event.

When she's alone and she thinks of him, she can even smell him. That's how much she missed the man. She kept his videos, his letters, his gifts. As if by doing those, she can be with him even for a while within those days that he was away.

A year without him felt like forever. Cold days felt colder, hot days felt hotter. Everything turned messy. That's because he was her gravity. The center of her world. He kept everything in place.

She can't sleep as the days went closer. Her heart beating faster everytime. Remembering the last day she saw him, what if he kisses her again. Will she get angry? Or will she just blush like she did? How does he look in person? She felt as if she was going to see her for the first time even with those videos and pictures that he sent.

On the 3rd day of February, she went to his home in Seoul. But instead of Kyuhyun it was his brother Heechul.

"Oh, oppa, why are you here?"

"Kyuhyun, asked me to give this to you." He handed her a box and bouquet of flowers. "It was a gift. After you opened it, give me a call. I'll be here."

He smiled and gave her a pat on the back.

When he closed the door, she went straight inside and felt the familiar warmth she always have when she's there. It felt home.

She sat on his sofa and open the box Heechul gave her. There was Kyu's phone, and a picture. She smiled. There was a teddy bear and a DVD with the label "Watch me ♥".

She opened his television and his player. And as the video started, she sat at the edge of her seat.

He was sitting on a chair inside a room painted in white, singing her favorite song.

"Annyeong haseyo Cho Kyuhyun imnida. Annyeong haseyo Eun Kyung~ssi." he bowed. "You missed me?"

"Ne." she answered.

He chuckled. "Good. Because I missed you too."

She laughed. He really knows how she will answer these questions.

"If you're watching this, it means that we didn't break up. It means that you waited for me. Am I right?"

At once she nodded.

"Eun Kyung~ah..." he blinked. "Eun Kyung..." his voice started to quiver. "Mianhae, Eun Kyung~ah..."

"Are you breaking up on me?" she asked.

"Yah, don't be angry. I'm not breaking up with you. No, I can't see you while doing this so don't talk too much with the video. I may not answer your questions. Just listen to me."

"You're making me laugh."

"I am serious."

He sat up straight and bit his lips. "I know that I can't fool you forever. Please listen. Don't turn off the player please..." he sighed and clasped his hands. He was shaking as if he was nervous. "It's been a year...now. To you it's been a year, right? But to tell you honestly, this was never a year to me. Don't you realize?"

She sat back.

"I never changed except for the color of my hair. Eun Kyung~ah...if you're watching this...I am long gone." tears fell from his eyes and he covered his face. "Mianhae Eun Kyung~ah. Cheongmal mianhae."

He bowed again.

"What are you saying?" she asked.

"New York, Los Angeles, Las Vegas...I travelled for two months and went back to Korea. I watched you, followed you around. Do you know how much it hurts?" he wiped his eyes and sighed. "I love you so much that I can't even come a step closer to you. I want you to see me like this. Happy, healthy. Eun Kyung~ah...right now, as you watch this...I might be in heaven."

"Yah, don't fool me!" she shouted. Standing. She paused the video and called Heechul "Oppa, what is this? Is this a joke? I can't take this!"

"Are you done?" he said softly. "I will come if you can't watch it. You need to watch it Eun Kyung..."

"What do you mean?"

"Watch it."

She played the video again, Heechul still on the phone with her.

"A year ago, I was diagnosed with cancer. I went to America, hoping that I will get better. Guess what," he shrugged.

"This is not true..." she felt her heart sank. Aching. As if something was squeezing it.

"Eun kyung~ah...my old lady...I shall love you forever. Do you remember that night? Did you regret not kissing me now? I don't want you to regret anything...I...Our distance may be infinity but I will see you again..." he smiled at her.

           "I cannot tie you with this lies forever. I cannot give you videos forever. I can't make Heechul hyung send you flowers on your every birthday. But what I can do is love you. Will you love me too? This is something I cannot ask you to do. In years, you will forget our love and move on. You will find a man that can stay by your side and get married. But I hope that when we meet again, you can smile at me and greet me like you always do."

She started to cry. "Oppa, come here now..."

           "Lady Shin...I will remain as your angel. I will stay with you and protect you. And as I end this, please always remember. That once, there was and old man Cho who loved you more than his life. Eun Kyung~ah...saranghae."

Kyuhyun went on his knees and bowed at her. That's the last time she saw him.

"So this is you?"

She stood in front of his grave. This time, she was the one to give him flowers.

"Yah! You old man, you didn't even let me tell you how much I loved you and stole my first kis like that!" she felt the pain inside her heart as she was answered by nothing but silence. "Cho Kyuhyun, how can you leave me like that? I didn't even get to kiss you..."

She went to her knees and cried her heart out. "Because you left me like this, I didn't even had the chance to take care of you. You deserved a kick from me when we meet again, remember that. But...Kyuhyun~ah..." she touched the stone with his name. "I can't promise that I will love you forever. What if I met another man? It's all your fault for leaving me early..."

She can even hear him chuckle. Telling her that it's okay with him...

"It's not okay with me! I wanted to love you forever. I want to meet you in heaven and look for no other man but you, yet, I can't promise you that."

A cold wind touched her face as if telling her not to cry.

"Kyuhyun...I loved you...and loved only you when we were still together. Right now, you're still the only person in my heart. In the past year...that love was never lost but instead it grew deeper. Although you may not be the only man I will love in this lifetime, I can never forget you. Because you are the first person who thought me how to love. Annyeong Kyuhyun~ah...let's meet again..."

And as she stood and headed back home. She felt him right there, his warmth, his smell...her Kyuhyun. And she never loved another man the way she loved him.