I call it admiration because that simply what it is. I look up to Mark ever since he saved me from those bullies. Mark was cool. Mark was smart. Mark was loved. Mark was amazing. Mark wasn’t me. So I changed myself so I could be more like him. It was my choice. No one forced me into doing anything and I loved every second of it. I liked sneaking into the underground club with him, I liked ditching school with him to go to the skate park and I liked knowing Mark would have my back through thick and thin.

Jackson calls it an obsession simply because I like being next to Mark. I like knowing what Mark was doing and where he was doing it. I call it being concern. He calls it being clingy. I am not clingy through. He also claims I am obsessed with him just because I do what Mark likes to do. He doesn’t understand I like it too now. He claims my style has changed but he didn’t know my original style to ever make that statement. Jackson says that the only reason I am close with Mark was because I was scared of others bullying me and I only have Mark as a friend. Which was a lie; I have others, I just like Mark better.

JR calls it a crush. I am straight like my other friends, like Mark. I only look at girls because that’s what guys do. Having Mark as my crush meant I was gay and I wasn’t that, I was sure. JR claims that I like Mark simply because I don’t like it with other girls talk to Mark. It’s not that. I just don’t trust other girls with Mark. Girls are conniving. Girls are rude. Girls are a distraction and Mark doesn’t need that. I am helping him. JR just laughs and says I am jealous.

Many people call my relationship with Mark many things, but I do know what it is. I do. I swear I do. I like Ma- Wait! No. I meant Mark is my friend, solely my friend. Aw! .