Just watching this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSciHkT9PRI&feature=youtu.be and suddenly I’m feeling gloomy and in the mood of writing something like this. I’m sorry I haven’t update the other story, but I promise I will complete it soon. I’m sorry for being slow :(

Suho was looking at the empty space in front of him. He hugged a lavender teddy bear in front of his chest while hugging his knees. He wanted to cry, he wanted to pour his sadness out, but he didn’t know why he couldn’t cry. To be exact, he couldn’t cry anymore, he already cried the past day before. His tears stained his cheeks and he had no intention to wipe it. He didn’t want to move, he didn’t want to talk to anyone although s tried to talk to him but he still refused to speak. His heart ached and he didn’t know how to cure it.

The past Suho will always smile and laugh at everything, but now, Suho himself couldn’t find any reason to smile or even laugh. His happiness was forcibly taken from him at the same day when Kris walked inside the plane to China. Suho wanted to stop him, to make him stay with him, but he knew he had no authority to do that. And he was hopeless.

He remembered few months before when they still promoted as twelve, Suho felt it was the most perfect moments for him. Every smiles, every words, every touches, every hugs from Kris were like his reasons to wake up in the morning and went thru the day. When he was feeling down, Kris will hold him and said that everything will be fine, that Suho can passed it and Kris will always by his side, supporting him. When he was happy, Kris will give his smile and they will share their happiness, ignoring the other things else because when Suho with Kris, honestly he couldn’t see anything else. All he saw was Kris and everything was like a blur scenes for him.

Suho glanced at his hands. He suddenly felt empty. It felt cold. Before, Kris loved to hold his hand and intertwined their finger. He will make his hands warm with his big hands. Sometimes Kris will kiss his knuckles while kept saying how beautiful Suho was. And Suho will be as red as tomato and Kris gladly kissed his tinted cheeks saying that he was cute.

Suho needed Kris like he needed air. He couldn’t breaths properly when Kris wasn’t around. He needed Kris to make him sane and live. And now Kris wasn’t here with him and he felt like dying.

“Hyung, you need to eat. Here, Kyungsoo hyung made this soup for you”

Suho could hear Sehun talked to him. But then his entire body was like refuse to answer him. His brain stopped working.

“Hyung, please eat. You haven’t eating for three days. Do you want to be sick?”

Sick? He better sick than had feeling like this.

“Hyung, are you listening to me? Please talk to me hyung. Answer me. Hyung, you need to stop doing this. It’s hurt to see you like this hyung. Please, I’m begging you”

Hurt? Sehun, you didn’t know how much pain I held. You didn’t know how hurt I was. And then a big tear fell from Suho’s eyes again. He cried. And it felt good.

Sehun shook Suho’s body and hugged him from his side. He put his head at the crook of Suho’s neck but then the latter still didn’t give him any response.

“Hyung.. Please..” Sehun begged. He wanted to have his old Suho hyung who loved to smile and laughed at him. He wanted to again and he will get a knock on his head. He wanted his old Suho hyung who woke him up in the morning with his brightest smile. And now his hyung became like a statue with no emotion.

“Hyung.. Talk to me please? Anything. You can curse me, scold me, everything but please hyung, please say something”

Suho opened his lips slowly, “It’s hurt Sehun”

And Sehun became a crying mess after he heard that. Sehun could feel how hurt his hyung must be. He needed to be away from Kris hyung again. They were away once before and they together again and now the separate again.

“Sehun-ah”

Sehun could hear Kyungsoo called him. He loosened his hug. “I’ll be back hyung” And he headed out.

“What is it hyung?” Sehun asked once he was outside Suho’s room.

“Kris is calling. He wanted to talk to Suho. Give this phone to him and make sure Suho heard everything Kris said” Sehun took the phone and brought it inside.

He sat beside his hyung again, and laid his head on his hyung’s shoulder. When he felt the phone vibrated, he hurriedly accepted it and put it on speaker.

“Suho, babe is that you?”

Kris’s gentle voice made its way to Suho’s ear. He missed him, he missed him a lot.

“Hey baby, talk to me. I’ve been trying to talk to you but Kyungsoo said you refused to talk to me. Why?”

Because I was afraid I couldn’t handle it anymore if I heard you.

“Babe? You’re there right? It’s okay if you don’t answer me back, just listen okay?”

Sehun put one of his arms on Suho’s waist while the other held the phone and put it on Suho’s knees.

“How are you doing babe? You’ve been well right?”

No I’m not Kris. I’m a mess.

“He said you haven’t eating for days. What are you doing? You want to be sick? You can’t be, I wasn’t there to accompany you and treat you and help you take your meds. You need to eat okay babe?”

That was exactly I think. You weren’t here with me. You won’t hold me when I sick.

“Love, you know I missed you right?”

I miss you more. I miss you so bad until I couldn’t breaths. I miss you until I felt like dying.

“Hey, you’re still there right? Please stop whatever you’re doing babe. You’re not hurting yourself but it’s hurting me too. I love you baby, I love you so much. Please.. Where is my old Suho? Where is my cheerful Suho? Where is my Suho whom I love the most? Please baby, I was hurting too. We can pass this, we always can. We did it before right? We can do this again. Just please, don’t be like this”

Suho could feel his tears forming on his eyes and slowly fell down his cheeks. It couldn’t stop and he was sobbing minute later. Sehun tightened his hugs and muttered some “It’s okay hyung” to him but all Suho could heard was Kris’s voice.

“Suho, please talk to me?”

Kris could hear a muffled sobs and finally he could hear his baby’s voice.

“I need you”

That was Kris heard, but it was enough for him to break down. He tried his best not to cry but it was hard. He himself missed Suho so much and he needed him just like Suho did, maybe more because Suho means everything for Kris.

Kris gave his best to answer back although he found his voice cracked.

“I know baby I know. But we can do this. Please stay strong, for me please? We can right? If you’re being like this, I don’t know what will happen to me..”

Suho who heard it just cried and said nothing.

“Babe, promise me to eat okay? Don’t be sick. The members love you, and I love you too. We’ll see each other soon okay? I’ll always be here, I’m not going anywhere. You can always call me, skype me if you miss me. We need to endure this for few months and we will be together again”

Suho sobbed harder.

“Promise me okay?”

“Hyung?” Sehun called when Suho didn’t answer the question.

“I promise” Suho said in the end.

And he finally realized that he needed to be strong for him, for members and for Kris. He needed to be strong facing this path. He loved Kris so much and he knew Kris felt the same and he hope it will be enough for now.

-end-

Such a fail I know :(

But let me know what you think guys, comments will be loved

See you soon <3

xoxo

FM

ps: you can see me on twitter @marishinyFM <3