In the darkness, I saw a well-known face in blurry. A bit by a bit, a shining light showed that person who stood centimeters away. He gave me a smirk. I didn’t know who at first. Nonetheless, his full face was scanned by my sight. That person lost his two eyes and it was…

 Kim Myungsoo.

I approached him but he said this all the time: “Forget everything about us, memories, promises, future plans. All. Live happily and take care of my eyes.”

The sentences were getting louder and louder so I stopped my pace to reach him. Rough wind flowed around me and darkness came to burry all Myungsoo’s face thus his body.

"Kim Myungsoo!" I called his name and darted to him but white light had shown up. My head was spinning.

I opened my eyes widely and sat up from my sleep. Someone said 'Shut Up' to me. I just realized to hear that it was Myungsoo's bestfriend who shouted. Lee Sungyeol. Furthermore, there were three other men near of me with worried expression.

"Sungyeol...!" An older man beside of Sungyeol patted him.

"Why... are you here? Where is Myungsoo?" I asked them with anxiety.

Instead answering of my question, a pretty boy spoke up. "Noona, you fainted on the floor and that’s relief that you woke up after 9 hours. But, doctor said you can go home now. I have brought your clothes to change and let's go home."

My fear was gone as the two men who stood in front of me smiling. Still, I was frightened to see Sungyeol’s glare.

"But I want Myungsoo." I cried out like a kid who wanted an ice cream.

"Noona, you should change it first and we are going to meet him. Okay?" A pretty man calmed me down. I obeyed him since I've heard this sound a lot before. He often played with me and Myungsoo at home. If I am not wrong, his name was Lee Sungjong.

~*~*~*~

 

After I had changed my clothes, I followed them, especially that pretty boy. But then I stopped my step while I saw many people around us. The three boys noticed it therefore they stopped – except Sungyeol. Sungyeol kept walking till I couldn't see his back. It made me more scared. Should I trust them?

Since then on, perhaps Sungjong knew about my phobia, because he held my hand and sent me a smile.

"Don't be afraid, noona. We'll be here for you."

I didn't know how to say to this kindhearted kid. He was so caring. I knew he might be mad at me because of my behavior towards Myungsoo. But he can bear it for my sake and maybe Myungsoo’s?
 

~*~*~*~
 

Finally we arrived at home at 4PM. yet I didn't see a man that I was searching at home. No one, except things inside this home. A piano was the first thing I wanted to see and I directly walked forward it. It was black, Myungsoo’s favorite color. I saw a classical guitar on the right. It was black, too. Suddenly, I missed Myungsoo.

"Where is Myungsoo?"

"He is gone. Happy?" Sungyeol replied shortly. It was hurt to hear. It cracked my heart. Nevertheless what should I do, I was the one who made Myungsoo left.

"I want to apologize that..."

"You don't need to! You didn't hear what he said?! He didn't want to interrupt your life again so he won't show himself up. Done? You are still not satisfied after using your eyes' lover to see the world huh?"

"Sungyeol-shi...how dare you..."

"What did you say? How dare you? I'm supposed to be the one who asked THAT. You made my best friend heartache. Do you know how much he loved you huh? You bothered me a lot. I..."

"Sungyeol. Stop it. Let her rest." A tiny eyes man cut Sungyeol's sentence.

"Yes, Sungyeol. Let her be in peace for today." A short one with thick lips stated.

"I can't, I just can't take this." Sungyeol cried.

His tears fell down. I thought he was a scary man who wouldn't cry. Sungjong tapped his shoulder. I felt guilty. I didn't know what to do right now, only following the words of three of them who were sympathized of me.

Before going to my bedroom, I asked where my room was. To say honest, I knew where it is, if I used my feelings. Yet I was being very hurtful so my feelings were weak to observe around. I felt really fools though it was my own home. Oh well no, exactly it was mine and Myungsoo's home.

The older one said to follow his way and I followed him. The short man opened the door and bringing my belongings into my bedroom.

"How could you forget everything after you can see the world?" The old one asked softly.

"I..."

"Never mind. Maybe you might have forgotten me too."

I nodded without thinking.

"Are you serious? You don't even know it from our voice? He is Sunggyu oppa and I am Dongwoo oppa. You called me that way." Dongwoo said. Ah, I reminded a bit.

"I'm..."

"No need to introduce. I know you. The six of us know you." Kim Sunggyu stated.

Now, I was fully remembered it. They were six men who always came to home and joking around us. I used to know their name from the voices beforehand but I lost that. It might be Myungsoo wasn't here so my weakness became bigger.

Hmm and...wait, it was only four boys were here. Where were the two? Were they with Myungsoo?

"I wanna..."

"Now you can sleep peacefully. Don't think much about Sungyeol." Sunggyu smiled.

They seemed to be a kindhearted like Sungjong, but I see was kind of pressure to say that. He didn't even mention Myungsoo towards me. What was going on? All I could do was closing the door and lay on the bed trying to take a rest.

After minutes, the door opened, I fake my eyes to close. Dongwoo and Sunggyu were observing me. They put the blanket on me. They left me and closed the door gradually. Out there, I heard the voice of boys talking about me. Probably they thought I ‘really’ was sleeping. It was quite low but my ears were pretty susceptible even though it's sort of far.

"Eugene is not remembering us at all except Sungyeol." Sunggyu said.

No, I knew Sungjong much better than Sungyeol. I mumbled.

"She is weak without Myungsoo. But she needs to be fully healed before we leave…"

I've no idea that they eventually going to leave me alone. I knew that well, they hated me too much but they wore masks and acted as they care of me.

Hhh, I took a deep breath.

This life was really hard, even hardest than 10 years ago. I want Myungsoo back to my life to cherish me. But the hell I made him leaving from my life. Should I blame God to give me bad luck or blame to myself because I don't have heart?

I stood up and looked at myself at the mirror. My tears were flowing seeing my eyes. I saw Myungsoo's inside my eyes. His eyes were so pretty. Even, prettier than mine.

I remembered the moment of yesterday that it was the first –or maybe the last- I saw Myungsoo. My eyes were not this pretty but his face was best of best that's why he still looked perfect.

I felt a big sin inside my heart. I cried again, a lot. This condition is killing me. I could not face it bravely. I just want to die.

No one loved me.

I didn't know how to live again, I decided to kill myself. I locked the door. I opened the locker whether I found cutter or sharp things. But the result was none. I looked out on my cupboard and commode. It was again ZERO.

I gave up searching it. I looked back at the mirror staring at myself. I cursed myself and smashed it. I was thinking to kill myself by the flake of the broken mirror. However, I failed. The boys heard it. They knocked the doors. I was shocked to see blood oozing from my hand. I reminisced the moment my father casted the glass on to my eyes.

I lost my energy. I was about to fall and the door opened. The four of them pushed the door bearishly. Sungjong caught me from falling. He was, again, the one who dare to hug me. I didn't know what was going on later, my vision was blurry and I fainted on his lap.

 

~*~*~*~
 

I opened my eyes when I heard the sound of the piano melody that I and Myungsoo made. I was still on my bedroom and saw two men looking at me worriedly.

"You are okay?" One of them said. His voice was very familiar.

Without thinking twice I immediately hugged him with crying.

"Myungsoo-yah."

"…Eugene, you are still dreaming?" Suddenly, the real voice of him broke my imagination of Myungsoo. I released the hug in disappointment.

My cheeks ran to red and said sorry. I didn't see him before but its sounds familiar to my ear. He smiled to me.

"It's okay. Do you remember me? I'm Nam Woohyun! You always called me Namu oppa. And The one who always tricks Myungsoo and everyone's around." He introduced himself.

He grinned. I knew he was trying to cheer me up but I was crying anymore.

"Oh my, Eugene. You missed Myungsoo that way?" Sunggyu asked.

I nodded like a dumb with tears flowing. Woohyun was looking for tissue surround the room and gave it to me. I recognized my right hand was bandaged. That’s why I wiped my tears by my left hand.

I heard footstep and saw shadow coming over closer and closer. I hoped it was Myungsoo. My heart was suddenly beating fast.

One step
Two step
Three step

I saw his foot.

And...

When I saw all of him body. That person's eyes were widened.

"Oh, Eugene, you have woken up! Let's eat dinner together."

I let my breath out. It wasn't him. I was too disappointed.

"Okay Hoya!" Sunggyu grinned and came after him.

I knew it well. They just acted to be happy towards me. It wasn't pure.

"…I don't want to eat." I glared to smiley Nam Woohyun.

"No Eugene! You have to eat! You look so pale! You haven’t eaten something from this morning. Look at your hand! Ah, it's all pain." He burst out and gripping my right hand. "I know you are still dizzy, but don't let your tummy empty. C'mon, you have to eat.”

"No, I said no.” I relinquished his hand from mine. “You guys acted as you care of me. You are going to leave me right after I am fully recovered?"

Woohyun’s eyes widened. "How could you say that? You still not get the lesson from Myungsoo leaving you alone? You really don't know how to say thank you!"

"I know right. You guys hate me like Sungyeol does."

Woohyun shook his head. "No, but you are such a rock headed. Please think twice about this matter. All you have done is saying sorry and thank you. That's what we want."

"..."

"Now let's eat." Woohyun pulled my left hand quite firm. I couldn't let it go. I wanted to scream and asking help but to whom? Since every people in here is one team with Woohyun.

 

~*~*~*~

On the way to dining room, I saw someone playing the piano. I stopped to examine it first. Woohyun as well stopped his step. The boy kept playing the melody that I and Myungsoo usually played. He suddenly recognized that I was watching him. He turned back and peeked at my sight.

"Oh, noona, you are awake." Sungjong stopped playing piano and approaching us. "Let's eat together."

That sweet boy pulled me lovely to the dining room. I was so touched that there are some people care of me. I prayed that it wasn't just an act but real.
 

~*~*~*~
 

Before I'm going to be near of three boys who sat beside the circle dinner table, I felt weird. I saw something odd. Probably, because there are eight chairs around it?

There were three seats empty and Sungjong brought me to the second row (from right). The right and left side were still empty until minutes later, maybe for Sungyeol? However there is still one more seat.

"Where is Sungyeol?" I suddenly asked.

"He is here, Eugene-ah." A familiar voice was there. I thought I was at dream because it kept echoing. My brain saying it was him.

I right away turned backward and that person was about 2 meters away behind of me. He was smiling at me. Exactly at me. My tears began to form and I ran to hug him.

"Myungsoo-ya, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I was really hate blind person but it was too much, right? I was so mean. I was so cruel. You can hate me, you can curse me." Before I finished up my sentence, he released my hug. He wrapped up my right palm then I said 'ah' because it was just wounded.

"Such a fool." He smirked.

He changed his hand to my left hand and pulled delicately on to his chest. Exactly on his heartbeat.

"My heart can’t hate you although my brain tells me that. I didn't want to meet you back then but when Sungjong phoned that you tried to kill yourself. I can't believe it. Seriously, how could you leave me like that without good bye?"

"Because I thought you are not going back."

Myungsoo chuckled. He touched my face, full of feelings. I was standing still while remembered the time were I used to touch his face.

"Don't cry, Eugene-ah. If you cry, I'll hate you." Myungsoo wiped my tears by his hands squashy.

"Myungsoo-yah..." I was crying. I couldn’t say any single word again. Myungsoo must felt a gigantic scar inside his heart but why he is so ‘relax’ towards me. He had such a tender heart.

He put his pointer on my lips. "Shh! Do you want some kiss to show that I still love you?"

"Yah, not now Myungsoo-yah." Sungyeol leaned his arm on Myungsoo's shoulder.

"Choding-ah, move away! How dare you interrupt me in this time?" Myungsoo threw away Sungyeol's arm away cutely. I giggled to see them.

"Hey, the six of us here watching you!" Dongwoo shouted. The rests were laughed and screamed, "Let’s eat first!"

I came to my conscious that 5 boys were watching us till now. I was blushed. Suddenly, I smiled –after a long time. I was happy, eventually. Because, the hero was here, in front of me.

I held Myungsoo's hand and brought him to the seat next to my side. I reminded the moment that I used to be like this when I was blind. I should, at least, pay it all.

I sat between Myungsoo and Sungyeol. Myungsoo’s left side was Sungjong. Whenever Myungsoo was with Sungjong, he talked a lot until he almost forgot my existence, as usual, but it didn't drive me jealous. Myungsoo ate his food not properly so I spoon-feed him. He acted spoiling at me. This cheerful boy sometimes like a man, but when I saw with my own eyes, he was like a little boy, too. It was the first time I saw him like this. I smiled for joy.

But then, Sungyeol who was on the right side wanted some water. No one helped him pouring so I poured at his glass but he glared. His eyes like telling, "You are such a lucky girl. I still hate you."

It created me awkward, but it was okay with me. Seeing Myungsoo is happy, I am happy.

All I want to say right now is Thank You. Thank you to God because he gave my happiness and my hero back. Thank you to his six friends to trust me that I was not a devil.

Particularly, to my precious one, Kim Myungsoo. I would like to say infinitely thank you for everything. He is willing to sacrifice his eyes to me. He laid my life on me. He was no limit to take care of me and protect me. Besides, I have hurt him.

I should, at least, pay it all by my responsibility.