#3 - Missed

Plot: It's not a party without a little couple drama... or in this case, ex-couple drama.

Genre: Angst? I dunno really

Word Count: 3,581

Notes: Sorry for the late update! ahhh /hides/ I apologize beforehand for this trainwreck, but yeah, here it is!

Jiyong typically wasn't the type to drink, but when a certain ex-girlfriend of his decided to show up uninvited at his party, he opted for the much needed confidence boost and thought, what the hell. Besides, there was no way he could enjoy himself now, not unless he had a little liquid courage to ease him through the night. 

He fell back into the armchair pushed away from the party and into the corner of his living room, and watched Jessica saunter up the stairs. She was giggling, whispering something to her blonde friend, Sunny, and maybe if the music wasn't mindnumbingly loud, he could've heard that cute giggle of hers. He shook his head once he realized where his thoughts were running and averted his gaze back down to the lip of his cup. 

"Hey, man," Youngbae yelled, weaving his way through a few people then squeezing his way into Jiyong's chair. He poured whatever remained in his plastic cup into Jiyong's and then bumped shoulders (or attempted to -- he was literally squished against Jiyong's body, which was anything but comforting). "Don't let her ruin your night, 'kay?"

Jiyong nodded, and then Youngbae was back on his feet, following Kim Hyuna's swinging hips down to the dining room. As soon as Youngbae was up, Seungri was down into the seat, legs all over Jiyong's lap. He should've seen this coming.

"She's history!" Seungri blurted, arms swinging around with his beer sloshing all over the carpet. Jiyong grimaced then took another sip to distract himself. "She doesn't know what she's losing -- honestly! You're a great guy, Ji!"

Again with the nodding. He looked over his shoulder in the off chance that Jessica was still at the top of the staircase where he'd last seen her, but there was no such luck. He felt Seungri pat his back, lay a wet kiss on his cheek, then he felt him get up from the chair. "I love you, man. If you need anything -- anything at all -- you know where to find me." Then he disappeared, presumably to the beer pong table in the back lawn.

Once he finally had peace to himself, a loud crash could be heard from upstairs and soon bodies began piling down the stairs. They all screamed things like, "It wasn't me!" and dispersed elsewhere before Jiyong could recognize their faces. Great.

He dug himself out of the chair and set his drink down on the table, not before downing what was left of it. He needed a little more than Youngbae's concoction in his system before he could even think of dealing with whatever was waiting for him upstairs -- especially with Jessica running around -- so he swiped another drink up from the table and downed it.

The clumps of people parted like the red sea, all gauging his reaction as he made his way up the stairs. In all honesty, he didn't really care if anything was broken. It wasn't like there was anything irreplacable, his mom practically purchased everything from the discount section at Ikea. He was only up to double-check that no one had made their way into his room (which he made sure to lock beforehand but who knew). The last thing he needed was some hammered couple sneaking their way into his sheets for a quickie; that just wasn't cool.

He frowned down at the ground seeing what all the ruckus was about. Some vase had apparently been pushed off of its mounting and shattered across the floor, maroon shards everywhere. Some chick was hastily sweeping the shards into a dust pan, wincing once she realized Jiyong had joined the audience. "I-I'm so sorry, Jiyong! I'll pay for it, I promise!"

He recognized the girl as Seohyun, the class representative who was as harmless as a fly. He wouldn't have recognized her, aside from the fact that she was Cho Kyuhyun's girlfriend, and anyone who could wrangle that little demon deserved to be recognized. He felt bad, she probably wasn't the one to break it, but the only one nice enough to stay around to clean up the mess.

He shook his head and gave her a small smile. "Don't worry about it. Find your boyfriend and make him clean it up. What's he doing, leaving his girl all by herself?"

She half-smiled, half-winced. "Kyuhyun's actually in the bathroom. He's not in the best condition, to be honest. I told him not to drink too much, but he never listens to me, and-"

Jiyong could infer. "What an idiot."

Seohyun allowed herself to chuckle, then Jiyong finally remembered why he was there to begin with. She dumped the shards in the nearby trashcan and he bowed in a rushed thanks. "Hey, Seo, have you seen anyone go into my room? It's the one down at the end of the hall."

She paused to think then slowly nodded, finger pressed thoughtfully to her lips. "Yeah, I think I saw-"

That was enough to send Jiyong down the hall, sprinting towards his bedroom door. If there was anyone in his room, he needed to get them out. Fast. Time was precious, and God knows what could go on in there if he waited any longer. No high school babies were being conceived in his bed, no no.

He pulled out a key from his back pocket and shoved it in the key hole. As he jiggled the knob open he came face to face with the one person he'd never assume to be there.

"Jessica."

"Jiyong."

There his girlfriend stood -- crap, ex-girlfriend - definitely wasn't used to the term yet -- right in front of him, lips open in a small o. He suddenly felt an awkward feeling wash over him, like he was the one breaking into her room and needed to explain. She looked at him like a deer in headlights, and then he realized something even weirder than her being in his room; she was wearing one of his shirts.

"You're wearing my shirt," he said, mostly to himself. He pointed towards the navy-blue t-shirt that hung loosely against her body and fell to her thighs like she needed help finding it, then coughed.

Her eyes bulged out of her face, then she instinctively lifted up the shirt he'd seen her in, which was currently balled up in her fist: a peach blouse, which now didn't look so peachy. "Y...yeah, I hope you don't mind. Sooyoung kind of threw up and the back splatter kind of-"

"Oh, no, yeah! I don't mind!" he blurted, raising his hands and probably making a complete idiot of himself. Evidently, alcohol didn't make him cool; it made him into an idiot.

She gave him a quick smile, then he asked, "Quick question: how did you get into my room? I mean, it was locked, so I'm just curious."

Jessica felt in her back pocket then tossed him a key he was surprised he could catch given his state. "Oh yeah, forgot to give you this. I've had it for ages, and this was one of the few times I actually had a use for it."

The key -- of course. He gave it back to her way back when, when they were stilll an item. When Jessica became a regular visitor of his room, he insisted that she carry around a key just in case she needed it. She never actually needed it (not until then, that is), seeing as she always made her break in through his window, but it felt good giving her something so sentimental. Like she was actually moving in with him.

He remembered her all teary eyed, clutching the key against her heart when he gave it to her. "Aw, Ji!"

Now, she didn't seem too teary eyed giving it away. Then again, they were over ages ago. He didn't know why he was surprised when she tossed it away so casually.

"We should probably get back to the party," Jiyong said, feeling awkward and without anything else to say.

Jessica awkwardly shifted from foot to foot. "I was actually thinking that we could stay in here for a bit. It's a little too crazy out there, and besides, I feel like I never get the chance to talk to you anymore. It'd be cool to catch up."

Jiyong looked once over his shoulder then calmed down Jessica's nervousness with a small smile. "How could I ever say no to you?"

Jessica laughed, forehead falling into Jiyong's shoulder. Her shoulders shook up and down as Jiyong animatedly recounted another memory. "I almost forgot about that! Your mother looked horrified! I can't believe she even let me over after that happened!"

Jiyong raised his eyebrows, biting back a quickly growing smile. "How could you forget that? My mom gives me room checks every night because of that one time! Even though we're not together anymore, she still suspects you're lurking under my sheets or something!"

"Oh, your mother loves me and we both know it!" Jessica said breathlessly. She cupped both palms around her can of beer and took another long sip, finishing it completely. "Every time I see her at the supermarket, she always smiles and says, 'Jessica, honey, you know you're always welcome at our home!' God, I wish she was my mom, she's so sweet!"

"I'm pretty sure my mom loves you more than she loves me," Jiyong said, feigning a glare. "She can never shut up about you, you know. I could never have another girlfriend without my mom comparing her to you, which she'd, of course, say that you're way better!"

"Well, I am a pretty tough act to follow," Jessica said, falling back onto his bed with a wide grin. A drunken blush crept up to her cheeks and Jiyong couldn't help but smile. "It's a pity things turned out the way they did."

Jiyong nodded, smile fading. "Yeah. Too bad, huh."

He knew the night was too good to be true. Sooner or later, the subject of their relationship would come to conversation, he just assumed it'd be later. He hated the fact that they weren't together, and he hated talking about it almost as much. He couldn't fake smiles and act like he didn't hurt anymore.

He didn't realize how long he'd been lost in his thoughts until he realized Jessica was waiting for an answer. 

"Do you ever think about us anymore?" she repeated, busily playing with the threads of his blanket like the question was as casual as asking what his favorite color was. "You and me and where we'd be if we never broke up?"

"I do," he confessed, much thanks to all of the drinks. "As embarrassing as it is to say, I do."

"So do I," she murmured. "I miss us."

He looked down, and it was then that he realized that she was looking at him -- gazing at him. It was the same gaze she gave him when she first confessed (because he was too chicken to even though it was obvious and she knew it long before he did), right before they first kissed, and when she first told him she loved him (again, he was too chicken to say it first, but it wasn't very hard to say it once she did).

"So do I," he echoed then sighed. "A lot."

Jessica pressed her eyes shut. "But we can't."

The catch. There it was. "You know we can't," she continued. "It wouldn't be right. I'm moving in a month and it'd be even harder to leave if I was leaving you behind -- leaving us behind."

"I know," Jiyong sighed, removing his hat to run a hand through his platinum blond locks. "I told you that whatever you decided, I would back you up 100%. If this is what you want-"

"This isn't what I want," Jessica said breathlessly. She sat up and grabbed his chin in her palms. "Look at me, Jiyong. You know I'll always love you. This is what's right, not what I want. I can't afford to break up with you again. I can't."

He nodded, not in the business of disagreeing with the love of his life, not when her eyes looked that sad, that desperate. He swallowed a lump in his throat and found the courage to speak. "Fine."

She desperately studied his eyes, as if waiting for him to convince her otherwise, then finally released him from her palms. He instantly craved her touch again, but knew it'd be a bad idea to find it. She sighed back against his pillows. "Why is this so hard?"

Jiyong was about to answer (he didn't even know how to answer that, actually but he was going to attempt to) when a loud pounding came from the other side of his door. "Yo, Kwon, we found this stack of mail in your hallway drawer! Maybe you should take them somewhere safe before someone else's grubby hands sift through your parents' paychecks!"

Jiyong popped up from the bed, stumbling ungracefully to the door (hoping Jessica didn't see it) and pried it open. One of his best friends, Daesung, gave him a look then shoved the envelopes through the crack in the door. He didn't seem to notice Jessica, wide-eyed and awkwardly sitting on his bed. He just sighed and shook his head. "Idiot. Keep them somewhere safe, will you?"

Jiyong gave him an apologetic smile then grabbed the stack. "Thanks, Dae."

"Yeah, yeah."

Once he closed the door and locked it again, Jiyong was able to give Jessica all of his attention. "Sorry about that."

She gave him a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. "Don't worry about it."

He padded his way toward the bed, sifting through the mail, looking for ones addressed to him. He pulled out a few then threw the rest on his desk. He wanted to give Jessica his attention, honestly, but one envelope begged for his attention and he couldn't help but gulp at the sight of it resting in the beds of his palms. The East Asian Foreign Exchange Program for Young Artists.

Jessica seemed to notice the sudden change in his attitude because she was up from the bed and padding her way over to him. "What is it?"

"Uh..." He didn't know how to answer her. Was it an acceptance letter? Was it a denial letter? He didn't know. All he knew was that he was too scared to find out. It had completely slipped his mind that it was coming in the mail, and he didn't know how that could even happen, but there it was and that's all that mattered. 

"Jiyong, are you okay?" she asked, giving him some room to breathe. "Do you need some time by yourself?"

He nodded, eyes still glued to the white envelope. "I'm sorry... I just... yeah, I need to open this alone, if you don't mind."

When she finally left, Jiyong let himself sigh and fell back against his door. After a few minutes of should-I-or-should-I-nots, he finally came to the counclusion that he should and tore open the envelope like it had the meaning of life written in it.

He sped through the letter, a gradual smile earning its way to his lips as he finished it. "I got in."

He got in. He was accepted to the foreign exchange program in New York, a foreign exchange program where he'd finally be able to do what he loved: music. Not only was he able to do music, but he was able to study conveniently close to the college Jessica was going to, also located in New York. And that, he thought, was a hell of a lot better than music. If there was no Jessica, there was no inspiration, therefore there was no music.

She had no clue he even thought of applying for the program, and it wasn't that he didn't trust her to keep the secret, but he just didn't want to get her hopes up. Getting his own hopes up was enough of a risk. 

It was then that he realized that there was nothing to worry about. They could stay together.

His legs carried him down the staircase. He practically fell over the people who were unfortunately standing in his path, but he was too excited to slow down. Once he reached the bottom, he tried to ground himself back to Earth and find Jessica through the crowds of people wreaking havoc in his house. He didn't care what they did, he only cared about finding her.

He found Seungri at the beer pong table and shook the poor boy until he felt the urge to hurl right then and there. "Hey, did you see Jess? I need to find her!"

Seungri shook his head then collapsed in a heap on the grass. Jiyong felt a little bad, but vowed to return for the kid later on.

He stepped over Seungri's unconscious body then bounded over to the garden where his mother's roses were drenched in something he didn't want to entertain himself with finding out. He found Youngbae, though, and after peeling his face of off Hyuna's he asked him where Jessica was.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Youngbae said, his speech slurred into a messy string of words. "The answer's no. Do not look for your ex-girlfriend, Kwon Jiyong!"

Hyuna looped her arms around his neck then pulled him back in to ravage his face. Youngbae didn't seem to press any further with his warning. Gross.

Jiyong left.

After what seemed like an eternity of searching for Jessica, Jiyong came to the conclusion that Jessica was long gone and probably not up to speak to him after her abrupt departure. Was she mad? Probably. Damn.

Gripping the bannister up the stairs, he shoved the letter into his back pocket and decided that the party wasn't worth sitting through without her there, especially if she was mad at him.

He hugged the walls, avoiding the couples making out in his hallway, and stumbled back into his room.

Feeling like he needed to sleep off the liquor, he belly-flopped into his bed and faceplanted right into his pillow. It still smelled like her. Ugh. 

"Long night?" an all-too-familiar voice teased followed by a giggle -- his favorite giggle. Her.

He rolled over and found Jessica leaning against his window with her head tilted in a way that made him love her that much more. How she managed to do that so easily, he didn't know. He never questioned it, only surrendered.

He swung his legs over the side of his bed and sat up, a lovesick smile plastered across his face. "God, I love you so much." 

Her smirk dropped into a surprised gape. "J...Jiyong."

He pulled her over to him, her legs in between his. He looked up at her and smiled again. "You don't have to worry anymore."

He fished out the letter. It was crumpled and torn at the edges, but it was there. He cleared his throat then, with a large smile, recited, "Dear, Mr. Jiyong Kwon, under the Eastern Asian Foreign Exchange Program for Young Artists, we are glad to accept you for the Fall semester at the New York International School of Arts located in New York, New York. Congratulations! We hope to see you there."

He looked up, and instead of Jessica jumping into his arms, kissing him all over (yes, he imagined how it would go over), he found her stunned and resembling a statue. She just stood there.

"Well," he said, grabbing her hands in his. They were shaking -- trembling.

"You better not be lying to me, Kwon Jiyong," she softly whispered, her lips hardly moving as she spoke. "It'd be a sick joke if you were. Don't you do this to me, Jiyong."

He pulled her down into his lap and she easily obliged, too weak to protest. "I didn't tell you because I didn't want to get your hopes up. It was a surprise."

She sighed, then pressed her forehead against his. "Damn it, Jiyong. I don't know what to say right now. I-"

"Say you love me," he whispered, stealing a kiss on the crown of her head. "Because I love you, and I really need you to say it back."

"I love you," she said breathlessly, gradually finding her voice. "I love you, I love you, I love you so much."

He could never get used to that. Her loving him. Her saying it.

As he found himself lost in his thoughts for the thousandth time that night, Jessica pressed her lips against his and he was brought back to reality. She removed his hat and her hands thoughtlessly ran through his disheveled locks. She pushed him back onto the bed and kissed him again, hungry for him as much as he was for her. 

He couldn't contain the smile that fought its way to his lips, and neither could Jessica. 

"Let's never break up ever again," she said against his lips.

"Never," he said against hers.

He lifted a blanket over their heads and the two disappeared into each other's worlds, not caring if there was a party going on without them -- not caring about anything else. Only each other.

"I guess you'll need the key back."

Their chuckles filled the room. "I guess so."

/hides/ what was that, i dunno. 

haha ok this just hit me out of nowhere, and i really wanted to write a make-up oneshot for them, so here it is! i wanted to continue this one shot so badly but i dunno how you guys feel about rated fics har har har. lol anywho, hope you guys enjoy! sorry for the late update, it's hard to think of ideas when you're so horribly uncreative. blah it .