Day 23

"Daehyun, what would you like to eat today? How about pasta?" Youngjae saunters over to the kitchen stove and starts preparing the necessary ingredients. He chops up some tomatoes while humming softly to himself.

He concentrates solely on preparing the pasta dish and soon he's ladling generous amounts of tomato sauce onto the spaghetti strands. He places both bowls onto the table - one at each end, and watches Daehyun take a seat.

"Enjoy your meal Dae." Youngjae smiles back while twirling the spaghetti strands round his fork.

He soon finishes his meal and places the dirty dish into the sink. "Hmm... You're not hungry?" Youngjae dumps the untouched dish into the waste bin as Daehyun eyes him quietly.

Daehyun isn't eating well these days.

Day 24

"Hahaha, this movie is hilarious!" Youngjae doubles over on the couch, smacking his knee as he jeers at the ridiculous scene. He throws his arm around Daehyun's shoulders as the older laughs alongside him. "They're so stupid!" Daehyun just smiles at Youngjae's demeaning comments.

Youngjae quietly peers at the older's face, but Daehyun only grins back at him and gestures to the screen.

Daehyun was quieter these days.

Day 25

Youngjae grabs his pillow from his own bed as he makes his way to Daehyun's room. "Daehyun, let's share beds tonight." Youngjae lifts the covers as Daehyun scoots over for him to get under as well.

Youngjae snuggles against Daehyun and places a hand on his chest. He kisses the older's cheek while sliding his hand down his torso. Daehyun just smiles again with his hands stuck to his sides. He closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep, his breath in a slow rhythm.

Daehyun doesn't show any interest in physical contact these days.

Day 26

"Youngjae, have you been taking these regularly?" Himchan rattles the small glass bottle, causing its contents to clink noisily against it. "Umm... I have." Youngjae avoids Himchan's hard gaze. "I know you haven't Youngjae. Here, take it now." Himchan shakes out some of the contents onto Youngjae's palm. Youngjae downs it with a glass of water and rolls his eyes at the satisfied looking Himchan. "Alright, I'm going now. I will come back tomorrow so don't think you can avoid taking them Youngjae." Himchan gives him one last encouraging look and leaves Youngjae's apartment.

Youngjae tosses the bottle back into the cabinet.

Himchan can be so irritating at times.

"Daehyun? Let's go for dinner now." Youngjae enters the older's awfully messy room, stepping over some discarded clothing to his empty bed. Youngjae frowns a little and starts searching his room.

"Daehyun! Stop hiding." Youngjae frantically darts in and out of the various rooms, uselessly flipping random items. "Daehyun, it's not funny!" Perspiration trickles down Youngjae's forehead as he stands in the middle of his living room. He does a 360 degrees turn, expecting Daehyun to pop out laughing. He pulls and clutches at his hair, forcing himself to remember what he could have done to offend Daehyun.

"You hate to see me take these right?!" Youngjae takes a few long strides and seizes the offending bottle from the cabinet before smashing it against the floor. It shatters into pieces, scattering its contents all over the tiles. "I-I won't take it anymore Daehyun! P-please come out Dae. Please." Youngjae breaks down into uncontrollable sobs as he collapses onto his knees. Glass shards dig into his palms, piercing the skin as it frees blood. "Don't leave me Daehyun!" Youngjae further embeds the shards, it hurts but he doesn't stop. 

The pain from his palms was nothing compared to the pain from his crippled heart.

The pain of losing his other half.

Daehyun suddenly disappears these days.

Day 27

"Youngjae! Jesus man, what happened to you?" Himchan rushes into the cluttered apartment to see an unconscious Youngjae lying in a pool of glass shards.

Himchan heaves Youngjae over to the couch and gently shakes him awake. Youngjae groggily gets up and stares at the embedded glass in his palms. "What happened?" Himchan sweeps the blood stained shards into the dustpan. "You made me take those crap and now Daehyun hates me!" Youngjae points an accusing finger at Himchan, ignoring the exasperated sigh coming from him.

"I will get you another bottle." Himchan finishes the sweeping. "No! I'm not taking any more of that !" Youngjae tosses the couch pillow at Himchan, accidentally knocking over a glass cup. "Youngjae, you've to move on. I know it's been extremely hard on you but..." Himchan sighs loudly and picks up the cushion. "I will be here to help you okay?"

"Shut the up! I know you've always disliked Daehyun that's why you're trying to make him hate me!" Youngjae jumps up in anger; his fists were trembling terribly. "Get out! I don't want to see you again!" Youngjae shoves Himchan towards the door; he swings it open and pushes Himchan out. He slams it shut and slumps against it. "You've got to get a hold of yourself Youngjae." Himchan pleads with Youngjae one last time before he gives up and leaves.

"Daehyun! Where are you!?" Youngjae screams hysterically, smashing the glass cup against the tiles before sinking to the ground. He curls up into a ball, sobbing quietly to himself.

Daehyun doesn't seem to care these days.

~~~

Youngjae wakes up from his troubled nap, slightly disorientated and confused. He smiles as Daehyun sits cross legged in front of him, grinning back just as widely. "Dae, you finally came back." Youngjae hugs him tightly, afraid that if he let go, Daehyun would just disappear. "Don't ever leave me like that again." Youngjae jabs Daehyun in the chest while the older just sits there with that stunning smile. "Himchan is a horrible person. He kept trying to make me take those pills." Hatred wells up in his chest again at the memory of Himchan. "Let's go for dinner Dae." Youngjae struggles to his feet just as Himchan enters the apartment once more.

Youngjae glares at him menacingly, daring him to make the first move. Himchan just places a new bottle onto the table. "Youngjae, you really can't go on like this. You have to move on." Despite Youngjae's obvious detest to Himchan's presence, Himchan still can't bear to leave him alone. Not when he knows his best friend is shredding himself apart like this.

"Daehyun look! He's going to make me eat those pills again!" Youngjae lunges forward and seizes the bottle; he tosses it out of the open window, not caring if he might hit somebody.

"Daehyun is dead! He died in a car crash and he's not coming back!" Himchan finally snaps, seeing Youngjae live in absolute denial was too heart-wrenching. "Liar! You ing liar! Get out and never come back!" Youngjae yells - nearly shrieks at Himchan to leave.

"I'm sorry that he's gone just like that Youngjae but life goes on... I'm sure Daehyun wouldn't want to see you like this." Himchan quietly closes the door on the fuming Youngjae.

Daehyun ignores everyone these days

Day 28

"Stop entering my apartment like it's yours Himchan!" Youngjae was starting to look like his apartment - dirty and unkempt. He didn't want to shower because Daehyun might leave him if he did. He didn't want to risk doing anything that could cause Daehyun to leave.

"Come, we're going to the psychologist." Himchan grabs Youngjae's hand and tugs him towards the door. Youngjae struggles violently; he even delivers a vicious bite to Himchan's hand. Startled by the pain, Himchan releases his hand. "You need help! Look at what you've become! I'm not leaving you here again!" Himchan makes a grab at Youngjae's hand again but misses as he dodges out of the way.

"There's nothing wrong with me! Daehyun, help me push Himchan out!" Youngjae looks at the older who's standing by the door with his hands tucked into his pockets; he smiles back but doesn't make a move. "Youngjae he's gone! And I'm trying to save you!" Himchan pleads desperately; Youngjae's condition had worsened drastically since he refused to take his medication.

Youngjae, come with me.

Youngjae snaps his head up to look at Daehyun - the source of the voice in his head.

"Daehyun, I will go with you." Youngjae whispers as Himchan's eyes grew big after registering what he meant.

Youngjae surges forward to the knife on the kitchen counter. "YOUNGJAE NO!" Himchan screams at him and dives forward to snatch the knife from his hands.

But he was too late.

The knife was plunged deep into Youngjae's abdomen. Blood spread quickly, overflowing from the wound, staining his shirt and spilling to the floor below. Youngjae clutches the knife handle and slowly sinks to the floor, despite his blurring vision and the searing pain, all he could think of was Daehyun. "No no no Youngjae! Stay with me okay? , where's my phone?!" Himchan quickly dials for the ambulance and literally hollers into the receiver.

"Youngjae, hey don't die on me." Himchan lifts Youngjae's head up and presses a hand to the wound to minimize the bleeding. But he knew it wasn't working and Youngjae had turned deathly pale from the loss of blood. "H-Himchan, it's our second anniversary today." Youngjae's voice was barely a whisper as he struggles to talk. "28 days ago, Daehyun promised to buy that King's headphone for me." Himchan quickly tries to shush him as Youngjae coughs and sputters, blood erupting from his mouth. "He was going to buy it that day." Tears slip free and roll down the corner of Youngjae's eyes. "But he couldn't." Himchan whispers words of comfort as he prays for the ambulance to arrive. "N-no Youngjae, don't close your eyes! Stay with me!" Himchan was sobbing by now; he knew Youngjae wasn't going to make it.

"I didn't even get to tell him I love him." Youngjae took a couple of shallow breaths; it was already becoming difficult to breathe. "Daehyun knows." Himchan brushes the fallen tears away and forces a smile.

"28 days ago, he broke his promise to stay with me forever." The wailing siren of the ambulance could be heard coming from afar. "Those fools are finally here! Hang in there Youngjae." Himchan grips his lifeless hand, trying his utmost best to keep Youngjae alive.

I'm sorry, Himchan.

"Youngjae! No don't-"

~~~