1/1
Transient
Title: Transient
Genre: Romance, Angst
Word Count: 3,087
Author: imal0s3r
Date written: Monday December 23, 2013
Characters: Luhan, Sehun
It was about 7:47 am on the 25th of December. Luhan was awake before Sehun. Luhan carefully and quietly crawled out of bed so he wouldn’t wake Sehun up. He headed over to his nightstand and slowly opened the drawer attached to it. Inside of the drawer was a medium sized notebook, with a leather cover. The book was Luhan’s diary, he had it since he was in the 6th grade, because he wanted to record everything that happened in his life and look back on it as he got older. From getting his first A on a test, to his parents’ divorce; everything was in this book. Luhan didn’t like to call it a ‘diary,’ because he thought it would take away his manly figure. Luhan hated it when people didn’t think he was manly. He liked to call it a journal.
Luhan opened the book to a fresh page. He grabbed the pen that was sitting on top of his drawer, and walked over to his desk.
December 25, 2012
Dear journal, it’s Christmas today! ^^ It’s currently 7:49 am, Sehunnie is still sleeping kekeke. I’m gonna let him sleep, since today I’m planning to surprise Sehun! I got him lots of presents, and I’m going to take him skating^^ I’ll report back tomorrow diary and tell you all the details~!
-Luhan
Luhan closed his journal, placed it back inside the drawer, and made sure Sehun was still sleeping.
He was.
Luhan hopped over to his closet and picked out his outfit for the day. A wool sweater, black jeans, and a beanie, along with his puffy jacket and thin scarf. Luhan decided to skip breakfast because he thought it would take up too much time. When he was all dressed, he made sure he had his wallet and his house keys, then double checked that Sehun was still sleeping, which he still was.
Luhan was going to reserve some skates at the ice rink downtown, since every Christmas Luhan and Sehun have spent together, the ice rink was always packed and there were no more skates available.
He was now on the train. The train was pretty packed, but Luhan managed to find one seat beside an elderly man. It was pretty quiet on the train; the people must’ve been tired from all the Christmas shopping they did. The silence broke when the elderly man spoke.
“Treasure the things you have today, because tomorrow they may be gone.” Luhan looked over to the man, who was exchanging the same look. “Excuse me?” The man’s gaze deepened and he repeated himself.
"Treasure the things you have today, because tomorrow they may be gone." Luhan tilted his head in confusion. The elderly man looked away and said, "Last Christmas, my wife and I got into an argument. The next day, she was gone. I found out that she was fighting with cancer for the past 4 years, but she didn't want to tell me because she didn't want to worry me." Luhan kept quiet, it was a quite heartbreaking story. "H-How long did you and her know each other?" Luhan didn't want to ask a lot of questions, but the old man was up to answering any that came his way.
The man sighed, and looked up. "Since Middle School." Luhan shot his head towards the old man, and looked at him in shock. The man looked like he was in his late 80's. So, they knew each other basically their whole life. Luhan placed his small, pale hand on the man's left knee. "I am so, so sorry." The older man shrugged. "It's alright, boy. I didn't give her enough love, guess it was my payback." The train stopped.
"My stop." Luhan snapped out of his daze and nodded. "O-Oh. Alright." Luhan stood up to help the old man. Before going, the man put a hand on Luhan's shoulder and gave him a small nod. The man left; Luhan sat back down and watched the old man head towards the escalator, until the train travelled into a tunnel, and Luhan could no longer see the man anymore. The random conversation that had just broke out made Luhan sit there in awe. It made him wonder why the old man told him that; it was as if the man knew something, but Luhan shrugged his thought off.
About 10 minutes later, it was time for Luhan to get off. He stood at the doors, waiting for them to open. When the train came to a complete stop, the doors opened and dinged, and Luhan exited.
Luhan got outside. It was rather chilly, and to Luhan's luck, he forgot his mittens. "Just great," Luhan said. The chilly winter wind sent chills up Luhan's back.
The ice rink wasn't too far from the train station, probably a 5 minute walk. It was about 8:25 am, and the ice rink opened at 8:30, so Luhan was right on time.
He finally arrived at the rink, and went over to the front desk. There were 2 people in front of him, so it was first come first serve, he supposed. After the 2 people in front of him were done, it was his turn. The lady there asked Luhan what time he'd like to skate. "Is 9:30 pm okay?" Luhan wanted to bring Sehun at night. It's better to skate at night, since the rink was illuminated with beautiful lights. "Yes, that's fine, sir," the lady confirmed. "How many people?" "Two. My boyfriend and I." The lady nodded.
"What are your names?" "Lu Han and Oh Sehun." The lady wrote their names on her list. Luhan then paid and walked away. He smiled to himself, thinking about how much Sehun is gonna enjoy tonight. Luhan planned to go back home and let Sehun open his presents.
Luhan entered his house, relieved that he finally had some source of warmth. He took off his shoes, jacket and scarf and marched upstairs to see if Sehun was awake. When he got up to the bedroom, he peeked inside. Sehun was still in bed, but he was too interested in his phone to notice Luhan staring at him from the doorway. Luhan tiptoed in, and when he got close enough, he ran and jumped on the bed, frightening Sehun. "MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Luhan yelled.
Sehun laughed, hugging Luhan. The two were now tangled in the thick duvet. After a while, Luhan got up and flashed Sehun a bright smile. "Merry Christmas, honey-bunny~" Sehun said cutely. Luhan smiled.
"Are you hungry?" Luhan asked. Sehun shook his head and Luhan nodded. "Do you want to open your presents?" Sehun jumped up and screamed, "PRESENTS WOOHOO!" Sehun jumped off the bed and ran down the stairs, which made Luhan laugh. Luhan followed Sehun.
Sehun was already sitting on the floor in front of the Christmas tree, eyeing his presents. There were 4 presents under the tree, which made Sehun excited, considering two of the presents were pretty big. Luhan walked up behind Sehun and sat next to him. Sehun looked at Luhan with pleading eyes. Luhan looked at Sehun and said, "okay, go ahead." Sehun clapped his hands and started with the two smallest presents. He started with the one with a cute Christmas tree wrapping paper. Sehun tore the wrapping paper, revealing a box of Spongebob underwear. Sehun chuckled and looked at Luhan. "I noticed you were running low on underwear," Luhan mumbled, loud enough for Sehun to hear. Sehun set the box of undergarments aside and moved onto the next present. When Sehun unwrapped the present, his face turned a bright shade of red, making Luhan laugh until his stomach hurt.
The gift was a DVD box set of ographic films. Sehun put the DVDs down and started hitting Luhan, until Luhan yelled at Sehun, telling him to calm down. "Why would you get me those?" Sehun's face was as red as a tomato. "You're legal now, aren't you? Plus, one time I walked into the room and you were watching on your laptop!" Sehun was taken aback. "W-When did I do that?"
Luhan responded, "I think it was 3 weeks ago? You had your hand in your pants-" Sehun held a finger to Luhan's mouth, telling him to shut up. "Okay, I get it, I get it."
Sehun pushed the DVDs to the side and moved onto the first big present. Sehun ripped off the wrapping paper and widened his eyes. The present was a MacBook Pro, and before Luhan could say anything, Sehun attacked Luhan with a hug. Luhan pried Sehun's arms off of him. "Since I know you like to write, I decided to get you this so you can write more comfortably and efficiently." Sehun smiled as he looked at the box, but then asked Luhan, "where did you get the money for this?"
The truth was, Luhan had been saving up for 2 years for this. His job didn't offer a big payment each month, so it took him a little over 2 years just to have $1200 in total, but of course, Luhan wasn't going to tell Sehun that. "It was already in my bank account, so I decided to get you this since I had nothing else to use the money on. Don't worry, I still have a lot left." Which was also a lie. Luhan was broke as hell now.
"Thank you Luhan! Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Sehun hugged Luhan one more time, then proceeded to unwrap his last present. The box was light, which surprised Sehun. A big box that was light, what could it be?
Sehun opened the box, but found a letter in it. He tilted his head in confusion. Sehun reached in and grabbed the letter, then opened it and read it.
Dear Sehunnie,
Waa, another Christmas I'm spending with you! How many is that now, 5? Anyways, I'm glad I'm spending all these Christmases with you, Sehun. Have I ever told you how much I love you? Well, if not, I love you~
Sehun smiled, then looked over to the embarrassed Luhan. He focused his eyes back on the letter.
Sehun, I hope we'll both continue to love each other and make memories, even when we grow old. Your soft kisses, and your warm hugs, I like that. I'm so glad I met you, Sehun. I remember our first Christmas we spent together, you told me, 'it's not about the presents under the tree, it's about who you spend this day with.' I've remembered that quote for these past 5 years. That's how much that quote got to me.
I hope you never leave me, because I don't know what I'll ever to without you, Sehun. Please, never leave me.
I love you, Sehun. Merry Christmas.
Sehun was now drowning in his tears, which made Luhan worry. "Sehun what's wrong?" Sehun dug his face into Luhan's chest. The two hugged for a matter of time.
"It's nothing. I'm just glad to have you in my life, Luhan," Sehun said, sniffing afterwards. This made Luhan tear up, but he didn't want to cry. Luhan never cried in front of Sehun.
Luhan was a man.
The both of them were finally calm, and spent the rest of the day and night watching Christmas movies. Luhan totally forgot they were supposed to go skating.
"Thank you, Luhan," Sehun said before they both went to bed. Luhan kissed Sehun's soft, pink lips, and the two fell into a slumber.
Luhan was awaken by the temperature of his room; it was cold; too cold. He rubbed his eyes and checked the window. It was closed.
He felt the space beside him, which is usually where Sehun sleeps. But it was empty.
Luhan switched on the lamp on his nightstand. Sehun wasn't there beside him. Luhan climbed out of bed and put his robe on. He searched every room in the house. Nothing; nada. He wondered where Sehun might have gone. He didn't know what else to do, so he just sat on the couch, figuring he'd receive a call sooner or later. About half an hour later, he did. He hustled to the phone and answered it.
"H-Hello?" Luhan's heart was now racing. "Hello. Is this Luhan?" The voice on the line belonged to a woman's. "Y-Yes. Is this about Sehun?" Many scenarios played inside of Luhan's head, and they were bad ones. Luhan felt like his heart was going to plop out of his chest soon.
"Yes. Are you able to come to the hospital now?" Luhan quickly responded and ran towards the door, slipping his shoes on and sprinted out the door. He didn't have time to wait for a bus or a taxi, so he ran. Luhan ran as fast as he could. Soon, he arrived at the hospital. He ran to the front desk and asked for Sehun. "Are you a rela-" "I'm his boyfriend." The nurse nodded and searched the computer. "Ah, yes. He's in room 302. You may go up-" Luhan took off without letting the nurse finish her sentence. Luhan took the stairs. He didn't have time to wait; Sehun needed Luhan.
Luhan arrived at his room. He quickly walked in, but stopped when he saw Sehun lying in a hospital bed. He was hooked up to an IV, and was wearing a oxygen mask. Luhan was now shaking. He felt his legs getting weak, as if they were turning into Jello. A nurse walked up behind him and tapped him on his shoulder, shocking him a bit.
"May I ask who you are?" "I'm Luhan, the hospital called me and told me to come." The nurse nodded. The nurse walked around Luhan, towards Sehun. "W-What happened to Sehun?" The nurse seemed shocked, as if he said something in another language she'd never heard before.
"Oh my, you.. you don't know?" Luhan was pretty much going to faint any second now. He shook his head, which made the nurse sigh. It was a while before the nurse responded,
"Lung cancer."
Lung cancer. Those two simple but strong words hit Luhan like a ton of bricks. He fell to his knees and stared at the ground in shock. "H-How long has he.." The nurse responded right away. "He's had it for seven years. When he first found out, the doctors said he'd only have 2 years left. But, after those two years, he's still here." Luhan then realized.
After the two years went by, when Sehun was supposed to die, him and Sehun met and their relationship started. It was Luhan keeping Sehun alive. Tears escaped Luhan's eyes; Luhan was shaking, and he wasn't going to stop anytime soon.
The nurse sure didn't realize how broken Luhan was, and continued to speak. "This morning at around 1:15, Sehun checked himself into the hospital because he was coughing up blood. He was bleeding internally and it was hard to stop. The doctors, and myself, think.. today's his last day."
Luhan was sitting on a stool next to Sehun's bed, holding his hand. Luhan's eyes were swollen and red. He was about to doze off, when Sehun woke up. Luhan felt a rush of energy flow through his veins. Sehun lazily looked around. Sehun's eyes landed on Luhan. "Luhan.." Sehun whispered.
Luhan wasn't used to seeing Sehun like this. Sehun was usually full of life and energy, always smiling, making jokes. But now, he was so pale and looked as if he got all the energy out of his body. Sehun laid there; weak.
"Sehun. Sehun?" Luhan just wanted to talk to Sehun one last time. "Luhan.. how did you.. get here.." Sehun took breaths in between some words. It broke Luhan's heart.
"I got a call from the hospital. They told me everything. Sehun, why.. why didn't you tell me?" Luhan's eyes watered when he spoke the last sentence. "I.. didn't want you to.. worry about.. me.." Sehun struggled to speak. Luhan sniffed. "God damn it, Sehun.." Luhan laid his head down and sobbed. Sehun held his shaky hand up and petted Luhan's head. After a while, Sehun spoke. "Luhan.." Luhan lifted his head up. His eyes were red and swollen.
"Luhan.. never.. ever forget.. I love you.. Merry.. Christmas.." Another round of tears hit Luhan, and spilled down his cheeks. Tears also escaped Sehun's eyes, too. Luhan regained his senses when he heard beeping coming from Sehun's monitor. Luhan widened his eyes and shook Sehun. "Sehun. Sehun. Sehun? Sehun, wake up, Sehun. Sehun, SEHUN!" Luhan was dragged away by nurses. He tried to fight them by kicking and screaming, but it didn't work. The nurses rushed to Sehun's side. Luhan was in the doorway, watching Sehun. "DO SOMETHING! SEHUN! WAKE UP! I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME SEHUN, WAKE UP! NURSES! WAKE HIM UP! I NEED HIM AND HE NEEDS ME!" Luhan yelled at the top of his lungs, making many people in the hospital crowd around. Some were covering their mouths at the heartbreaking scene. Luhan squinted his eyes shut.
He suddenly heard a never ending sound coming from Sehun's monitor. Luhan looked at the monitor; Sehun's heart beat was now just a straight green line.
It was over; Sehun was gone.
December 25, 2013
Dear journal, it's Christmas today. Actually, it's the first Christmas I've spent without Sehun in such a long time. Today, I'm planning to visit his grave, to wish him a Merry Christmas. Because, as Sehun once told me;
'It's not about the presents under the tree, it's about who you spend this day with.' So, maybe I am spending it with Sehun. But it's not the way I wanted to spend Christmas.
What kind of flowers should I get?
I probably won't report back tomorrow.
I'll probably report back again next year. Goodbye, for now.
-Luhan
And so, from that day on, Luhan only wrote in his journal every Christmas.
[A/N:] This fic is dedicated to those who have lost somebody close and won't be spending Christmas this year with them. All my prayers go out to you.
This is also dedicated to my grandmother, who was like another mom to me, who battled with cancer for over 22 years. She passed July of 2009.
Sorry if this fic isn't that good, it's my first time writing angst. T-T
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