Breathe, I Can't.

When I look at you, I always feel lightheaded. The floor I stand on melts into a pile of jello beneath my feet and I stumble to and fro. But I don't fall since you have this electrifying stare that probes into my mind and take control, pulling me forward and into your hands. Your big, warm hands with perfect manicure.

Once you have me secure into your grasp, I collapse and I'm suddenly me again. The magic spell is taken off and my knees buckle.

What is this? What are you doing to me?

You pull me closer and you my hair and hum. You hum and sing and hum, causing me drowsiness when it's a fact I have insomnia.

You my cheeks and caress my lips while you continue to hum and sing. You look me in the eyes and I'm caught yet again in your terrifyingly beautiful orbs, sparkling in the dim light. You have me in your control again.

"How do you feel?" you ask me.

I gulp and shake my head. I shake my head and close my eyes shut.

"I can't breathe."

I never can when I'm near you. You who have this magic aura to your whole being. Your eyes, they sparkle and pull me into your lair. Your voice, telling me what I want to hear from everyone else without actually saying a word. Your touch, it grazes over my sensitive skin and alerts my every nerve.

And your lips, they activate me and I'm certain I've become a totally different being. A being closer to you--Kim Jonghyun--than I was before.

But I still can't breathe, no.

But I'm still alive, yes. I'm still the outcast Lee Jinki that I was for the twenty-one years of my life.

"But I feel more alive, more real than I ever was."