His big, calloused hands are gripping onto fistfuls of her hair, unwilling to let go and taking out his raging anger on the girl that was supposed to be his girlfriend.

Luna wonders how she came to love this monster, but after three agonizing months of torture, she finally broke it off. He got sick and tired of her, saying that she was the same thing. He was right though, she was the same person.

(Though completely different from the girl who had fallen in love with the likes of him.

Victoria and Amber still worry about her, as she now developed an irrational fear of dating men.

All because of this relationship.

Because of him. But she would never admit that.)

She still goes to work with as much confidence that her shattered self-esteem can muster; it isn’t much, but it’s still enough for her to keep living.

She smiles at her coworkers half heartedly; she looks completely wrecked and broken, but her colleagues know better than to mention it.

The dark circles beneath her eyes never really do go away.

Luna sits in the cafeteria alone, a can of grape juice in her right hand as her head nods from side to side, completely dozing off. 

Her mind thinks of nothing as she watches the world around her pass by.

Though on this particular day Victoria and Amber decide to sit with her, bickering in some language that she didn’t understand. 

She guesses that it’s Chinese.

Though her understanding of the language was limited, she did manage to catch wisps of words. Something about ‘new,’ and ‘Onew.’

Even the name was intriguing. 

Luna turns her head to the other two women, glassy-eyed stare gone for once.

What are you guys talking about? she timidly asks.

Victoria lets out a hearty chuckle, Oh, just the new worker here. I heard he works in computer engineering.

Amber butts in a few seconds later, According to his coworkers, they all say he’s good looking. Oh! And he wears glasses too.

Luna just nods in understanding as she attempts to form a genuine smile; the effort was futile, but both of her friends give her understanding smiles in return.

Her work finally ends at five sharp. She’s slowly packing up her things, still lost in the nothingness within her mind. She looks back up, bag slung over her shoulder, and peeks into the computer room.

She sees a guy in a suit, hunched over something that looks important. Luna suddenly feels whimsical, though she has no idea why.

Curiosity starts to peak as Luna edges closer to the room, wondering what this guy could look like. She faintly recalls how Minho and Leeteuk were both praising the new guy’s education.

Apparently he placed second in his entire high school.

When she’s right next to the door, body slightly arched as she peers into the room, curious eyes wandering about the room.

There are computer monitors everywhere, along with at least six file cabinets stuffed with papers and what not.

Onew, she thinks the guy is, is hunched over some manual, reading intently as his hand fiddles with a pen.

Her eyes continue roaming around the room, noticing the stark whiteness and it reminds her of a hospital. She shakes her head, willing the strange thinking from her mind. 

Luna’s about to make her way inside, to introduce herself and perhaps exchange formalities, but she’s stopped dead in her tracks when she looks to her right, her gaze traveling along the wall of the corridor towards the oncoming group of people.

It’s Jonghyun and Se Kyung, the most lovely couple within the company that they rival the CEO and his wife (though we all know their relationship has been strained somewhat, due to the economic crisis gripping today’s world.)

She suddenly feels insecure, gripping the strap of her bag tighter as she puts on a plastic smile, her only thought to get the hell out of this place. She likes Jonghyun, and Se Kyung, but it gets gross when they’re together, which is always. 

With quick steps, Luna turns on her heels and casually walks, or bolts, to the nearest exit.

On the ground floor of the building now, Luna leans against the marble wall, releasing a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She can feel her erratic heartbeat, completely audible in her ears.

Why did she act like such a fool, she wonders as she sits at home, papers strewn over the coffee table and floor. Her dinner on the far end still sat there untouched.

Head propped up on one arm and nerdy glasses placed on the bridge of her nose, Luna goes over her behavior today. She’s never acted like this before, even when she had this major crush on the hottie of her high school, who ironically was Kim Jonghyun, she never acted this foolish.

Peeved beyond belief, she just blows a few strands of blonde hair from her face, for them to only flop unceremoniously back down.

Working isn’t an option tonight, Luna decides.

- -

Several days pass and still nothing has happened in the office, Luna notes; her pen taps against her chin as she looks over some paper work. Krystal and Jessica are chattering at the water cooler like always while Sulli and Jo Kwon are debating on another disastrous fashion topic. 

She doesn’t notice (Victoria does) but it’s become a routine for her to take peeks into the room Onew occupies most of the time; creepy, not really, but stalkerish? Almost. 

He’s always working on some project or reading manuals and it’s then that Luna decides that he’s too good; the perfect husband.

But she smiles good-naturedly, a casual hair flip when appropriate, and shuffles her feet a bit when people walk past her as she stands around the door of the computer room.

Luna’s left heel digs into the carpet when she attempts to work up the nerve to talk to him. It doesn’t happen when she watches Kim Taeyeon walk in instead, casually patting Onew on the back, a bright smile and a gentle laugh escape her rouge lips and Luna’s too scared to do anything anymore. She watches closely as Taeyeon and Onew joke around for a bit, completely unaware of the tears threatening to fall from her lovely eyes; she attempts a miserable smile, but ends up walking away, her back slightly hunched in silent defeat.

Victoria looks on worriedly as Luna’s small frame continues walking down the hallway until she finally turns the corner and for a moment, she thinks Luna might be in love with Onew. But she shoves the thought from her mind, her conscious screaming at her it’s too soon! She’s not ready! She rubs her eyes slowly, looking more tired than ever.

- -

A few weeks passed and Luna’s mood hasn’t changed much; her smiles look a little too forced and the sparkle in her eyes look a little too fake, but neither Amber or Victoria mention it. Instead, they smile and play along as Luna talks about her new interest in psychology. 

As Luna continues to blabber about theories and such, Amber notices Onew enter the cafeteria, along with a flock of co-workers fawning over him; Luna’s hand unconsciously tightens as the can in her grasp audibly crinkles. Victoria’s worried eyes flicker towards Luna while the said girl laughs uncomfortably, wiping her hands on her pencil skirt.

They’re both worried about her, but neither can do much for her. It’s all up to Luna on whether or not she wants to do something, or anything, with her feelings.

For now, Amber and Victoria plan on keeping an eye on Luna hoping that it wont end in the same way her last relationship had.

What neither of them know is that Luna is highly aware of her feelings for Onew, but she’s too frightened to express her true feelings.

She wants to, but she can’t.

So she doesn’t.