the sunshine gives my colden heart a warmth feeling.

i knew i shouldnt look at you nor even love you

but it pains me most to know that i can but i wouldnt be able to.

im afraid.

 “It's true, I am afraid of dying. I am afraid of the world moving forward without me, of my absence going unnoticed, or worse, being some natural force propelling life on. Is it selfish? Am I such a bad person for dreaming of a world that ends when I do? I don't mean the world ending with respect to me, but every set of eyes closing with mine." i blurted out on you once afternoon i let myself drown at the sweetness and pain that your love will bring to us.

we were both lying on your dorm bed.

.

body closer to each other.

your hands on my waist. 

securing me tightly afraid that when morning comes i'll be gone on your sight.

it was ironic that i didnt even blurted out what i was thruing to yet you can read my mind as clear as the water stream.

" i love you.!" i blurted all of a sudden making you startled at my word and after the long silence you smile at me.

hug me and telling me a hundreds " i love you too! "

~~~~

our love wasnt the perfect as they seem.

you were not the prince that my brother and my parents want me to be.

i lived a life of a queen.

and you where just a fish that caught my curiousity as what my older brother heechul told me.

you were nameless.

and the plate you had is almost empty.

you where all alone .

no family to lean on.

but that didnt stop you for extending your hand on me.

begging for me to grab you.

and i did.

~~~~

donghae, i was once knew that happily ever after only exist in fairytales.

yet, i still hold my last thread hope of being with you and experiencing the ma