Past Farewell: Ruki

Ruki POV

I’d like you to think back to the very first time we met,

How did you felt around me? All the memories that we shared with each other,

And those times of happiness, you showed me how much you really cared.

Now think about how we parted, and how much you cried.

I won’t deny that I lied so many times. You told me the honest truth about why we had to split.

It was a cold winter night as I stared up at the starry night sky while sitting on a bench near the crowded street markets down in central Tokyo. I blink once, and then stared down to my shoes, lifting my hands only to adjust my scarf close to my mouth. I took a deep sigh before standing up on my two legs again and continue walking down deep into the city.

Since 2 years has passed, Now, I’d like you to know that my heart is heavy full of regrets.

The pain in my heart is unbearable and too painful. The weight keeps getting heavier and heavier.

For so many years of being together, not once did I say I love you.

Not once did I take you to the places you wish to go.

Not once did I go to any of your special events to support you.

Not once did I listen to your feelings.

I’ll never forget all the sadness, all the uncontrollable tears you cried because of me.

Because of my indifference towards you. Because of my selfishness, and all my needs.

The streets were filled with many peaceful noises, the sweet gentle voices of society, the freshly made food being stirred fried. It was nice to come out at a place like this, feeling welcomed and what not. But something felt missing, something very cozy and warm. I started to walk near a concession stand and bought myself some snacks and continued my way exploring what’s ahead. The food in my mouth tasted unusual… It wasn’t the same. At least, without her it wasn’t the same.   

At first, after when we parted, I thought I’ll be fine, because I didn’t care.

But I realize now…

That you were a special part of my life that I’ll never forget,

A part of my life that I can never get back, the part I can never replace.

I remember, you gave me some happy memories that I’ll keep in my heart.

I wished that we both didn’t have to part. I guess I haven’t really moved on.

  I felt something vibrate in my pockets. I stopped in the middle of the streets and reached into my pockets and flipped out my phone.

“Moshi moshi?”

“Heyyy Ruki! Ano, the light bulb went out in the bathroom and… I kinda need you to buy one before you come back.” Aoi said on t the other line. I started to chuckle as I heard all the other guys shouting in the background over a stupid game.

“Hai, will do.” I hung up my phone and placed it back into my pockets and resumed walking. Not for long, I reached to a local department store and came out with some pair of light bulbs, just like Aoi had asked me to. Just before when I wanted to head home, I heard a very familiar laugh from behind. A very angelic laugh which I had thought I would have never able to hear again. Slowly, I turned my back around to only see her and her new lovertogether, enjoying their time like a real, true, passionate couple.

I felt my body to tense up just a bit, but telling myself that she wasn’t mine no more, I relaxed a bit. With more realization, I envied both of them. If I hadn’t made such silly mistakes, would I have been with her till this very moment with her by her side with her arms around mine? Just like that?

She lifted her hand, gliding her fingers through her hair behind her ears with such happiness. It’s such a shame for me, not once did I even notice her beautiful face and elegant postures. She looked so happy. When her eyes slowly went up, her smile started to fade as her eyes spotted me as I stared into hers. I blinked a couple of times, making sure I wasn’t seeing things. But no, she was really there. She too, also glanced down a couple of times then back at me with a sad and uncomfortable expression. Seconds later, tears slid down my cheeks.

If I had one wish, I’d use it to turn back time and erase my mistakes, and to take better care of you.

To love you, to be the man you deserve.

 But now, it’s impossible, now that I see your arms around his, and that smile plastered onto your lips .If you ever happened to see me, for our sake, please pretend that you didn’t see me as I will do the same by walking away. And to just let you know, with your arms around him, I’m in deep pain, and I know I deserve it. But I’ll just continue wishing you the best. I have no right to break your love and happiness between you and him.

3^rd Person POV

Within minutes, Ruki quickly turned away and paced himself far away from her. He could feel her eyes on him as I turned to the corner and disappeared from her sight. The young lady stared across the streets, widening her eyes never taking her eyes off to the corner which he had turned, she had sworn he had saw him shed a tear. Her boyfriend smiled down at her as he passed her the vanilla ice cream cone she had wanted. He realized her interested out in the opened city market and gently nudged her on the arm. She looked up to her boyfriend and smiled, taking her cone and continued walking with him in the streets. As they passed the corner which Ruki had run through, she stopped and looked back, making her boyfriend stop as well. Her boyfriend stared at her confused.

“Are you alright baby? Is something wrong?” he asked, she made no response and she kept staring at the corner. She looked down and then at her boyfriend giving him her cone.

“I’m sorry! I’ve gotta go!” she said running to the corner, leaving her boyfriend confused.

After running to corners and streets, she ran to another corner where she might have thought Ruki might have run. She ran to a large beautiful fountain area and sat herself down next to it on thenorth side of the area. It was no use, he was definitely gone. She lifted her hands to cover her face as she began to cry. She had realized even though Ruki and she had separated, she still had feelings for him. And maybe after seeing Ruki shed tears, he might have loved her too.

Ruki POV

I ran to a large fountain area in which it was peacefully doing its own water show. I came to sit next to the fountain on the south side to catch myself a breath. My breathing was heavy and so was my heart, I put my head down to my knees and raised my hands to my head and scrunched my hair to bare the pain. Warm tears came streaking down my cheeks and landed on my pants. Quietly, I cried in pain, wanting to just forget what’s happened tonight.

Remember when we said forever? The hopes and dreams we’ve had together? All the happiness we could ever want?

I won’t deny the fact that I was the one who threw all them away. And till this day… this is something I will always regret until I die.

3^rd Person

“I’m sorry …” he whispered down on the south side of the fountain.

“I forgive you” she whispered up on the north side of the fountain.

(Technically, they are both at opposite ends/sides of the fountain without realizing that they are both at the same place at the same time.  :[ )

The End

I hope you guys enjoyed! Even though the couples never ended up being together. Another one of my oneshots from Quizilla. :) Comment?