"Let’s break up."
Those words kept circling me, I don't know if I had heard you right.  Did I hear you wrong?
          All of a sudden, right after I had paid for a nice meal for us to share- you blurt out those three words.  Not "I love you", but "Let's break up".  I was in a state of complete shock, what had I done wrong?  Giving you gifts and paying you visits, was I not supposed to have done all that?  Cancel my own plans to make room for yours?
          Wait, everything is falling into place now.  You had your fun with me and now you shock me by saying you want to break up.  But to me, not only is breaking up shocking, but it's also very painful.  Breaking us apart, breaking the bond I thought would be tied together and tightened for life.
          After slowly thinking about it, I know I can’t live without you.  If you’re not here, I’m not here either; all I do is just breathe.  Breathe, but not think.  Breathe, but not live.  So tell me, what's the point in living, if not really living?
          Should I be a man and let you go?  Should I forgive and forget?  Should I hug you goodbye?  All these thoughts frantically run through my head.  All these thoughts- they fill my mind.  And my mind in an empty sky with dark clouds full of thoughts and memories of you.
          But in the end, I knew I couldn’t do any of that.
          Just going to bed early today, I needed a little time.  I’m not in the right state of mind right now.  Spending hours in bed, wide awake at the late hours- I had hoped this was all a lie.  Simply a silly, foolish lie.  Perhaps a twisted joke you were playing on me.  Then it hit me: it's not April.  It's not April 1st.
          I thought a lot, after my had tears dried.  There isn't anyway you would even care to understand how hard this is for me, or feel empathy.  Do you even have feelings?  I don't know.  But I don't think so.  Spending all my time- No, wasting all my time has been a pity.  A weight load of pity on my shoulder that I have carried with me, but didn't need.  And now that you're gone, you've left scars on my heart that I can't erase.
          Warm trickles of salty droplets showered down my face yet again.  How could I be with another woman that’s not you?  You can’t even imagine how hard it is.  I had thought about the future with you, but it’s all wrong.  I don’t want to love another woman that’s not you.
          Your eyes are too hateful towards me to say that I’ll be better.  There’s just no way, I cannot avoid this, never never.
          So tell me, Minah.  Tell me, why?