Kim Kibum’s first impression of Choi Minho was that the other was quiet, polite and reserved.

Kibum wasn’t interested but didn’t detest him either. It was a mutual friendship, leaning more towards the relationship one would share with the work colleague you never got to know very well. Kibum was loud, nagging, a snappy-talker and the perfect diva. Minho was quiet, didn’t talk much and was all things silent.

They just didn’t fit.

Minho didn’t seem to put any effort into getting to know him either so Kibum decides to leave their relationship strictly work-wise. Any moment between them alone was either awkward or uncomfortable; resulting in the long silences Kibum hated and Minho revelled in.

They were just that different.

…

Choi Minho’s first impression of Kim Kibum was that he was a typical fashionista, who really didn’t give a whether you thought of him as a or not.

Minho was interested but decided to stay away, failing to find a way to approach him. Kibum was all things opposite of him. Minho couldn’t stand shopping, or gossiping, or nagging which seemed to be all at the top Kibum’s list of ‘things to do’. Kibum didn’t seem to need him much either, always with Jonghyun or out with other idols. Kibum just didn’t seem to have a time or a place for him.

They didn’t fit.

It wasn’t that Minho liked silence. Sure, it was comforting and left him in peace but he would be grateful for conversation every now and then. He didn’t talk much simply because there was nothing to talk about, at least with Kibum and so they often succumbed to silence when put together. He knew Kibum detested this and so he tried to avoid being a bother and stayed away from him. He and Kibum were like water and oil.

They were just that different.

…

When Minho let his hair grow out, Kibum’s first impression was that it was kind of y, not that he voiced this opinion.

He loved the way it framed the younger’s face and how it fell in long locks at the back of his neck. Kibum found it even cuter when it was tied in a small pony-tail and so often did it for Minho in the morning. It was their first real interaction and Kibum honestly quite enjoyed it and for once, the silence is comforting.

He’s pretty sure Minho hates people babying him so he finishes quickly then exits the bathroom to get dressed himself.

Kibum misses the smile that appears on the youngster’s face.

…

When Kibum first starts taking care of him, Minho’s first impression was that he’s either had too much coffee, or Kibum was on crack.

Kibum had made it very clear before on a variety show that the only person in SHINee he didn’t look after was Choi Minho. When asked why, he replied: “Even though he’s younger than me, Minho is really mature! He takes good care of himself and helps look after the rest of the group.” Minho says nothing and just smiles for the camera. He’s not so sure how to feel.

Kibum’s hands are now playing with his hair, running through it and undoing knots, face screwed up in concentration.

Minho watches him through the mirror in front of them and begins to realise and pick up things he’s never noticed before.

The way Kibum sticks his tongue out when he’s working hard, the way his eyes glimmer when he laughs and how warm his fingers are as they graze lightly against his neck. It made his heart flutter. Kibum’s quick hands finish the job and he turns Minho’s head to the mirror to admire his handiwork. Nodding in satisfaction, he turns around and walks away before Minho can say thanks.

Minho smiles and refuses to undo his hair that day.

…

Kibum’s first impression of Yooguen was indescribable and all he could manage was a squeal of admiration and delight as he ran to him.

He loved the curly, long hair and those big eyes that stared up at him and Kibum immediately fell for him. Kibum realised, as time went along, how alike Yooguen and Minho were. They would have their moments and be suddenly quiet, other days full of energy.

Kibum babied Yooguen with all the love he had tried to send to Minho and looked after him like no other.

…

Minho’s first impression of Yooguen was fatherly and he felt a sudden responsibility, as if he’d have to look after his real son.

He didn’t miss Kibum’s constant petting of Yooguen’s hair or the tiny pony-tail Kibum would be doing for him in the mornings. Being with Yooguen meant being with Kibum and it seemed to give them time to mend a relationship that’d gone to a rocky start. A conversation could be made with only slight pauses, those gaps of silence filled by Yooguen’s sudden plea for attention.

For the first time, Minho saw a smile from Kibum, this time directed towards him.

It gave him butterflies.

…

Kibum’s first impression on Jonghyun was the perfect best friend. He was handsome, charming and never still or quiet.

Jonghyun gave him butterflies.

Minho… was something different.

He made Kibum happy and made him smile but when it came to butterflies, nothing. Minho was a good friend and nothing more.

…

Minho wanted to be a good friend and everything more.

He wanted Kibum’s love, Kibum’s attention and to be able to tell him ‘I love you’. It just wasn’t that simple. Approaching Kibum for Minho was terribly hard. Every step had to be pre-planned, every word carefully ordered and every step monitored, just so he didn’t fall apart in front of him like a stumbling fool. Heart-in-throat, he’d attempted to make conversation with Kibum behind stage.

Just as Minho opens his mouth, Jonghyun walks up from behind Kibum and wraps his arms around Key’s waist, tickling him to no avail.

Kibum’s laughter echoes through the otherwise quiet hallway and all Minho’s courage was swept down the drain.

The next time the SHINee family is together, Kibum’s in the kitchen banging around with his spatula and making chicken, Onew-hyung behind him and badgering him to go faster. Minho smiles, watching his Kibum contently as Onew raises the heat of the stove every time the diva looks away. Something told him that now, was finally his chance.

…

Minho’s first impression of his first kiss was with a perfect girl, with shoulder-length bronze hair, a shy smile and on the beach.

He didn’t expect to be sharing it in the kitchen smelling of chicken, with the nagging, loud and diva Kibum, who just didn’t happen to have shoulder-length hair. Instead, he had half his hair shaved off, and a spatula in his hand that Minho was so sure he was going to be smacked with.

It definitely wasn’t how his first kiss was planned, only more blissful and kind of beautiful.

Minho had been so lost in the taste of Kibum’s lips and the feel of his hair to even notice Onew who was watching them, gaping. When he pulled away, Kibum looked close to tears as he wrapped his arms around Minho’s neck, slapping Minho on the back with the spatula in the process. Kibum had been too busy with Minho to catch the pained glance Jonghyun sends their way.

Minho notices and says nothing.

He’s happy.

“YAH! You burnt my chicken!”

…

Kibum’s impression of Minkey is of something that would just never work out.

He had no idea what either of them was thinking that day in the kitchen because now, all that love was replaced with confusion and pain. Their argument just minutes ago played in his mind.

“Minho! How many times have I told you that the white clothes go in a separate basket?”

“I’m really tired, Kibum, could you just stop for a minute?”

“I’m tired too, yet I have to go around, picking up your junk after you!”

“Fine, if you hate it so much, I’ll just leave! I’m sick of your mothering!”

Minho slams the door behind him, leaving the rest of the dorm speechless. Their arguments are pointless, quarrelling over small things in life other couples could look over. They were short, loud and often ending in tears on both sides. Kibum knows he’d overreacted, like he always has and wants to apologise but doesn’t know how. For once, he has nothing to say.

…

Minho knows he’s overreacted and he has too much to say.

There was too much anger and frustration to relieve and he knows he’ll end up hurting Kibum, so he runs out. Minho doesn’t know where he’s going but it feels better than the place he’s just left.

Two weeks.

Two weeks they’d been together and Kibum had picked up more of Minho’s faults, voicing them aloud and driving them both crazy. Minho loved Kibum more than anything but sometimes the stress got to both of them and their polar opposite opinions crashed and collided.

They were just that different.

…

A month ago, they broke up, promising to remain friends. As soon as they were no longer a couple, the room temperature seemed to go up ten degrees or so and everything was easier to manage. Minho watches Kibum from the couch like he always does and decides they just weren’t meant to be.

Jonghyun walks up to Minho and taps him on the shoulder.

Minho looks up.

“Ah, hyung. Sit with me.” The youngster says, patting the spot next to him.

“I got something to tell you, Minho.” He said as he took a seat, looking down shyly at his feet, something he’s never done before. “Promise you won’t tell Key.”

“Okay.” Minho replies, lowering his voice.

Jonghyun pulls something from out his pocket jacket secretly, and opens the little box for Minho to peer inside. Inside sat a small assortment of chocolates, each carrying a letter and spelling out:

‘Be my Valentine?’

Minho forced a smile as Jonghyun looked at him excitedly.

“You think he’ll like it, Minho?” he asks expectantly. “I made them with Taemin yesterday.”

“He’ll love it hyung.” Minho manages to say; surprised his voice hasn’t cracked yet from all the pain he’s feeling inside.

“I needed to ask you, for your consent I guess.” Jonghyun admits, closing the box. “Do you still love him…?”

For once, Minho lies.

“He’s all yours, Jonghyun. Look after him.”

…

That night, Minho stop’s by the bedroom he shares with Jonghyun and puts his ear to the door.

“Hm… please, Jjong.”

Key’s enticing voice just barely makes it through the door, breaking Minho’s heart in the process.

“Ah, Jjong… hnng.” Kibum groans and it’s followed by a string of moans.

Minho decides to sleep in Kibum’s bed tonight; ignoring the questions Taemin asks him as he walks in. He curls up in Kibum’s scent and hugged his love’s pillow, acknowledging that this was the closest he was ever going to get to him. He wishes he was better, less quiet and everything Kibum had ever wished for.

When Kibum finds Minho is his bed the next day, he scolds him about touching his possessions.

Minho is in disbelief that Kibum would say such a thing, after he and Jonghyun probably ed in Minho’s bed last night. He runs out the room without apologising, hoping Kibum doesn’t spot the tears that force its way through his eyes.

…

Minho’s last impression of Kibum is bitter, with whispered I love you’s, heavy hearts and unvoiced feelings. Everyday his mind is plagued with the words ‘what if’. His heart feels like ten tonnes now, filled regret, unfulfilled love and heartbreak. He’s broken, unloved, hateful and alone.

Then, he’s weightless, as he plunges off the bridge.

…

A/N:

Oh god.
This isn’t right. -_-;;;

This was meant to be a happy story, but it kind of died half-way once I ran out of ideas.
I was hesitant to even continue this story from the foreword but I felt guilty for starting something and leaving it unfinished, so here’s the ending.
I'm hesitant to press the 'add chapter' button.
 

Comment…?