Today was the day. We got up at an ungodly hour. Hana supported Minjung on the way to the van. Yun was of course ready for this day years ago. I made sure Eunmi didn’t fall asleep with her face smooshed up against the window. Wouldn’t that be a good picture? We were on our way to shoot our teasers.

We had a rough idea what it was going to be like. Our concept of course had been already explained to us. We were literally constellations come down from the heavens to share with humanity the beauty of our talents. We were encouraging humanity to attain goals and such. So our first set of teaser photos were just going to be us in our poses, with a dark background and the stars making our outline. I applauded our company for adding mystery to our debut.

We arrived at a large warehouse where they were taking our photos. Yun was the first one out of the van and striding purposely forward. The younger ones hung behind me. Eunmi’s mouth hung open and Minjung continued to rub her eyes, convinced she wasn’t seeing what she was seeing.

“Holy cow,” Hana said, awe apparent in her voice.

“Come on,” I started to shoo them in like frightened chickens.“It only goes up from here.”

“I don’t think I’ve been in a building this big,” Eunmi stated.

“Thanks for sticking with the group and helping out Yun!”Yun simply waved away my statement ahead of us.“I better not be given any piece of cute clothing or I’m going to write a strongly worded letter to Lee Soo Man.”

Sanghee led us to a roomful of shoes and clothes and accessories. Yun was already thumbing through the clothes on a hanger labelled with Lyra. “Make-up is through that door. We’ve got a long day ahead of us girls, so work your hardest okay?”

“This is really happening, isn’t it?” Minjung said in a small voice, but I could see the stars of our future in her eyes.

“It is,” I popped a tender kiss on the top of the maknae’s head and hugged her. “I don’t know about you, but I’m excited to see what I’m wearing.” I nudged Eunmi and she nodded.

We dived into the world of kpop idols. First was hair. We were all brought to a room that looked like a grade A hair salon. Each stylist unnie assigned to us already knew what they were doing to our hair and were under strict orders not to tell us anything but just to get on with it. All of us were getting color changed except for Eunmi. I decided to just close my eyes and let what was about to be done to my hair commence and I would just open my eyes and it was done.

When my color was washed out and the stylist unnie was drying my hair, I tried hard not to stare at the reflection that was staring back at me. “Blonde?”

“It matches you very well,” The stylist unnie confirmed.

“Unnie!” Hana shouted. I turned with a hesitant style but Hana wasn’t yelling about me. Yun was sitting in her spot looking pissed. Her hair was still the devastating long length but her entire head was fire-engine red.

“Wow,” I said. Yun looked completely different. The fire practically burned in her eyes from her anger, but she looked like a force to be reckoned with, with that color of hair.

“I have never had to dye my hair in my entire life. I don’t even have split ends. And now you’re doing this?” Yun’s voice grew louder and louder with her fury. Sanghee interfered and desperately tried to calm down Yun but she was in a mood and sticking to it.

Meanwhile I watched the other members transform. Eunmi received an asymmetrical cut that ended at about her chin. It was very choppy and she had a lot of fringes but the exciting part of her change was that she received neon pink tips. If they wanted Mimi to come off as mysterious, they did a good job. Minjung’s hair was blended into a dark brown and cut to her shoulders. She now how blunt bangs across her forehead and the stylist unnie was currently making her hair wavy and that style very much suited her face. Hana looked happy with her new light brown hair. It was cut and styled but for our concept they were putting her hair in low pigtails. My stylist put the final touches on my hair. Now that it had dried, I felt like I was in someone else’s body with this fluffy blonde head of hair. It was being straightened and I had a little bit of a bang pushed to the side. The hair transformation was complete.

Clothes were handed to us and we changed and then changed again until they were satisfied with the combinations. There were a lot of stark blacks and whites with flashes of color amongst them. I didn’t see any of the other members while I was changing.

I stood in my dressing, staring at my final product. I tilted my head. My newly colored hair looked good with my outfit bit… wasn’t Yun supposed to be the y one? I was wearing black, low-slung, hip-hugging, ripped pants, a white and green letterman jacket and a green tube-top that only barely covered my bosom. I was revealing a lot of skin.

“Andromeda, all the other members are out here. Come join us,” Sanghee invited.

It wasn’t like anything was going to change the longer I stood there. I pushed aside the curtains hiding me and I met everyone else’s eyes with a gasp. “Wow you guys look so cool!”

Nobody had make-up on yet but the coordi-unnies had done us proud. Yun had on a tight and short military leather jacket, with a red under shirt underneath and a tight, leather pencil skirt that ended above her knees. Eunmi had on baggy, sweat pants with a symbol by her hip in neon pink, an equally baggy shirt that fell off her shoulders and a tank top under that was neon pink. Hana was wearing a black, sleeveless one piece with pockets that had a short skirt and a hood with random streaks of orange as if painted on and short shorts underneath. Finally, the maknae had on biker shorts that went to her knees, a sheer, turquoise skirt with many layers and suspenders that ended mid-knee, and a tight t-shirt with cartoon eyes on the front.

“Unnie,” Minjung’s eyes got bigger and bigger as she took in my y outfit. “I didn’t even know…”

“Sanghee!?” Yun screeched. “Why do I have more clothes on than Andromeda??? No one is going to believe that I’m the one in charge of y if she’s wearing that!”

“Lyra, calm down,” Sanghee began again. “The company wants to take advantage of Andromeda’s age and turn it into a good thing and not a bad thing.”

Lyra still had a slight pout as we were ushered into the last stage which was make-up. “If it means anything to you, I think you’d pull this off better than I ever could,” I whispered to her, buttoning up the jacket so that you couldn’t see my navel.

“It doesn’t make me feel any better,” Yun said in a clipped tone. Well, that was the last time I tried to be nice to her and make her feel better.

“I don’t know why Yun is so angry,” Minjung started. “You two look really y and I just look like a twelve-year old.” Now the maknae was pouting.

“Minjung, you’re barely over the legal age. They can’t go around flashing your baby skin,” I told her in a no-nonsense tone.

“What about me?” Eunmi asked in a tentative voice.

“You’re wearing loose clothing to show straight up that you’re our dancer,” I assured Minjung.

“But…” Eunmi focused me with the intensity of her stare, “I don’t look like I belong…”

“Don’t worry Mimi. See, Lyra and Carina have dresses and you and I have pants. There’s a pattern. Of course you belong!”

“I, for one, am completely satisfied with my look,” Hana said, not realizing the air was crackling with apprehension and resentment.

“Why wouldn’t you? You get a hood to cover up the horrible dye job,” Yun snapped.

“Don’t say such mean words to Carina!” Minjung yelled, “You look like a y kpop idol and I look like I’m making a commercial for children’s cereal!”

“Don’t fight,” Eunmi pleaded, shrinking into her chair.

“Girls!” Sanghee hollered. “Please be professional about this.” Our manager began to travel around the room to apologize for our childish fighting. I wanted to get up and help her but the look my unnie gave me, posed with a sponge and foundation made me stay in my seat.

We five girls were slowly becoming Nebula. We had dramatic make-up with a little individual flare for each member. Minjung’s turquoise made her eyes pop and the gems that the make-up artists glued to her skin along her eyelids and outwards on her temple only made her eyes bigger. Yun’s face was painted with variations of red and sparkles. The unnies carefully put on ruby gemstones that fanned out in a v-like shape similar to a v of birds, the tip starting at her hair line and continuing to shine on her hair, tight in a high ponytail now. Eunmi was watching as pink gems were applied to her nails and pinks highlighted her fair skin in whirls of blush and eye shadow. Hana held her head very still as orange gems outlined her lips. I thought the color made her seem edgy and cool as our rapper. Emeralds and limes made a color palate on my face but I got worried when no gems were applied to my skin.

“Excuse me,” I started, worried about my place in the world all of a sudden. My old fear that I had desperately attempted to push came bubbling up. There was no way at this moment that I would be discarded…

“I need you to take off the jacket,” The stylist informed me.

I did as she said. I stood up and carefully folded the jacket over the back of the chair. The unnie crouched in front of me and I was relieved to see that she had a bowl of green jewels in her hand and a brush to apply the glue as well. She started to put them starting on my stomach and moving lower and lower all the way to the hemline of my pants. The lines and swirls continued, following the artfully rips in my pants and suddenly I understood. My y image just got boosted even more.

I caught Minjung sending me jealous looks and I sighed. We were starting to look like a kpop girl group but we were certainly not acting like one. I thought of our sunbae’s like Girls’ Generation and f(x) and their companionship and worried that we would tarnish our company’s image. Something needed to be done to change this cloud of discontent over our heads.

Make-up was complete and we were ready for the photo shoot now. Hana and Minjung were pissed off at Yun and I. Yun wouldn’t even give me a second glance. Eunmi was staying far away from any disputes. We were a group divided. We all bowed respectively to the staff but that was about the only thing that we did in sync.

“Okay, who is courageous and volunteers to go first?” The photographer rubbed his hands together in anticipation. The warehouse was eerily silent and one of the staff members coughed to fill the awkward hush. The eager smile on the photographer’s face fell slightly, “Come on now! No one? You’re a rookie group, right? You should be fighting over who would go first and outdo each other!”

At that moment, I knew it was time for me to take the first step and lead my group of girls. I was the most worried, with my blonde hair and new y image that I wouldn't be able to pull it off but I knew I shouldn’t be worrying about that. “I’ll go.”

Sanghee sent me a grateful look, “The leader should always go first.”

I walked, putting one stiletto foot forward after the other and found myself in the center of the ceiling-to-floor-black material. The lights were almost blinding to the point where I couldn’t see any of the staff or other group members. I shielded my eyes and asked, “Is here good?”

“Yes!” The photographer shouted. “Now strike your pose and show me who you are, Andromeda!”

I spread my legs, one ankle wobbling because I was unused to the height, set my hands on my hips and raised my chin in a challenge. Whatever you throw at me, I’ll throw it back in your face. I had been through more trying situations than this and I was confident that I could do this photo shoot with ease. The photographer started to give me advice: move this arm, adjust that leg, what kind of emotion I should have on my face, etc. They needed more photos for the booklet that would be released with mini-album.

It was quiet once again as we worked. The photographer informed me that what I had down was perfect and then next was Yun. With a flick of her ponytail and her hips swaying she took my place on the black velvet. She gave the camera a seducing look. I watched with a slight smile as the photographer pulled at his collar and started to take a couple of shots.

One of the staff members waved me over and I peered over her shoulder at the monitor in front of her. There was Andromeda, the leader of Nebula. Those hot lights highlighted her hair and her revealed skin. I had no idea where the confident smirk had come from but there it was, on my face, demanding anyone to tell me they didn’t find me perfect. The letterman jacket was tucked behind my hands on my hips. My pants were straining because of my wide stance but it pushed the gems up against the rips. I realized that everything about my pictures, down to the fine details, made me me. I was the leader, I was the oldest, I had the most developed body and I had the most confidence.

The staff showed me quickly what the other image would look like, with the black background the white silhouette and I was happy with how clear and precise my body came across. Suddenly I was happy for the hours I had spent standing and holding that pose in the mirror. If you’re going to do anything, you might as well do it well.

Yun’s started to blink onto the monitor. With a turn of her head and twist of her hips, she was the epitome of her y self. Yun thought she was God’s gift to men and that worked well for taking photos. Of course, Yun had experience with this sort of stuff, having been with the models of SM for a long time. The photographer told her how much of a natural she was and she pretty much sent an ‘f-you’ look towards me. She joined me at the monitor.

“Don’t you dare think that the boys will drool over you rather than me,” she said snottily.

“Lyra, it’s not a competition,” I murmured.

Hana went next and my eyes followed her as Lyra monitored her photos. “Of course it’s a competition. I want to be the most popular member.”

Hana went back and forth from cute as the second youngest member to cool as the rapper. She really reminded me of Zico from Block B. It was fun to watch her go from mouth-opened aegyo to gritting her teeth and brandishing her large bling on a chain.

“I would hope that you would put our group before your own personal goals. If we all fail then so do you,” I reminded her.

“Don’t tell me what’s important in my life,” Lyra snapped and walked away to go get some water.

Minjung’s photos also went well. Minjung was working her aegyo and had the unnies whispering how cute she was. Sometimes the photographer told her to tone it done a little bit. She also tended to situate her body oddly which he made her correct. But Minjung took the criticism well, which I was proud of our youngest member for.

Eunmi didn’t have to smile once; she just had to go with a mysterious persona. The issue was that Eunmi really didn’t know what to do period. She had her pose down but any other poses had to be egged on by the photographer and they were both getting frustrated. I could hear Yun snickering about Eunmi being a rookie and I wanted to throttle her.

“One moment,” I begged the photographer and then joined Eunmi.

“Mimi, you have to be more confident in yourself,” I whispered.

“I can’t unnie,” Eunmi looked at me and I could see the waterworks beginning.

I grabbed her head in both hands and brought my forehead close to hers. “You can. I know how talented you are. You are such an amazing dancer and you deserve to have a good set of pictorials for our album. Do you remember when we were playing around after we watched Chicago and danced and made random poses?”Eunmi nodded. “Pretend we’re playing that. Any dramatic dance pose you can think of, snap it into place. Think of this as freestyle dance, except instead of smooth moves it’s just poses.”

“Okay, I think Maia is ready again!” I shouted and ran back to the monitor to watch what Eunmi produced. Our dancer took a deep breath, shook out her limbs and then proceeded to make the most remarkable poses I had ever seen anyone do. It was almost breathtaking the way her body moved.

At last, they wanted us all to get into our line up according to the order we stood in our poses but wanted us to look very chummy and such. It was a little bit difficult because Minjung was still angry about looking cute compared to Yun and I, plus Yun’s smug attitude and Eunmi’s hesitancy for skinship.

So I did what I thought would break the ice. I started to dance in a goofy way to the music coming out of the speakers. Hana laughed and joined in with me. Eunmi smiled broadly and joined in with us. Hana swung an arm around Minjung’s neck and I poked Yun and then it was like the tension was gone. We were just five girls who lived in close vicinity, and for better or for worse, we were stuck with each other to the end. We all viewed the monitor in silence as our companionship came out with the cameras help. The fans were going to be obsessed with Hana and Minjung’s mood-making friendship and my tendencies to protect Eunmi. Yun was…well Yun was proving more and more that she was in this for herself.

The end of the day came very late and all of us bowed deeply to the staff for their help. The trip home was a silent one, devoid of all the jittery nerves we had on the way to the warehouse. I sat in front while everyone else conked out.

“You know Jinae, today you were really the leader of Nebula. I’m proud that you’re taking the role seriously,” Sanghee said softly, surprising me.

“I…” I was speechless for the moment. I wasn’t aware such a small compliment could mean so much to me. I straightened my shoulders. “It was what was needed. I felt the call to help Eunmi and group and that’s what I did.”

“Well you did the right thing,” Sanghee confirmed. “Congratulations on your first teaser photo shoot, Andromeda.”

“One of the many we’re bound to have,” I replied back confidently.

“Now I just have to hope that the company will push Exo and Nebula together. I really want to win that bet against Hyunkyun,” Sanghee said, naming a manager of Exo and sounding mischievous.

I rolled my eyes that she was bringing up the pairings up again. “This again?”

“You sure you don’t want to know who I think they’ll pair you up with?” Sanghee dangled a little bit of information in front of me.

“I’m sure,” I agreed although it didn’t come out as confident as I meant it to be.

“Sure?” Sanghee repeated one more time.

I scoffed at our manager, “If you want to reveal it, just say it already!”

“Kris,” Sanghee said. Her eyes flitted to my face, trying to keep an eye on the road and an eye on my reaction.

I was speechless for a few minutes… “Kris? He miniatures me though! Plus…” I hesitated to tell Sanghee that Hana already had a growing crush on the Chinese member.

“He’s got a stoic face like you, and he’s got a rapper and leader role,” Sanghee listed off her reasons. “Plus I think they’re going to be requesting a lot of aegyo from both of you.”

I burst into laughter at that comment. “Aegyo from Kris? You’re hilarious Sanghee.”

“Mark my words,” Sanghee said, making sure she got the last word.

I sat up by myself that night, tucking a blanket around me and watching idols on variety shows. The day’s events swirled around in my head plus Sanghee’s words that I was growing into my leader role. I didn’t know what the company were going to throw at us next, but I was assured that I was equipped to handle it.