Siwon's true point of view, it was anger and jealousy. He admitted that, he knows inside he hates Kyu for being there alongside Hae. He was always pissed and always frustrated, he didn’t like it one bit. He knew that from the beginning and he recalled the day it didn’t became quite an issue for him.

Siwon bore his gaze on the younger that was with Donghae, it had only been a day since he heard Hae helping out Kyu’s mishaps with a bunch of thugs. He didn’t like the trouble that the younger man had behind him, he most certainly didn’t liked the fact that he was all too close to his crush

“Hyuk… are you sure it’s fine for Hae to hang out with an like him?” he didn’t tore his gaze, Hyuk sighed “I know what you mean… but I can’t dictate my cousin about it, he’s too kind and forgiving that he forgot all those bad things they’ve done to each other…” he trailed off and getting something out of his locker “It was kinda like a peace treaty between them after that day” he continued

“Well for starters we all know that Kyu likes to get himself it misfits, he always has people to fight him. He’s definitely a troublemaker” he sighed at the thought, “Well I don’t blame you for thinking about something like that, he might be a geeky guy and always gets the top grades in class but he’s also a tough guy” he agreed knowing that Kyu was a rather rough nerd to fight with

He was top in class and loved by the faculty, and it really meant the whole faculty. He was also the student body president, managing the whole activities from time to time and making sure all the clubs were doing things perfectly without violating his laid down rules. He was a perfect icon for a student and a leader; he knows how to do everything according to his plans but one thing that broke that seemingly perfect image. He loved to fight

Though he always takes the boundaries of his fights out of the school premises, he enjoyed kicking people’s for a sense of leisure. It was odd of a nerdy guy to pick a rumble but, it was his real side. What’s odd about it, the teachers doesn’t seem to have any idea that he goes in and out of battles but everyone in the school knows one thing though, Kyuhyun and Donghae were both a negative and would always clash when they met

He always hated Donghae for somewhat reason, what that reason maybe he didn’t bother asking nor tried to know it. He hates Kyuhyun for being like that to someone kind like Donghae, and right now, seeing them together like they didn’t held a huge grudge on each other the day after. He didn’t liked it one bit

“Hyuk, I think this is a bad thing. Kyu maybe a symbol of a true student but hell will I let this pass… for all that we know, he might end up beating the crap out of Donghae once he fully held his guard down with him” Hyuk nodded to agree, Kyu never faltered to make Hae get pissed

But a strange sight, all the student around them was also shocked on seeing them both nearly a few inches away from each other. It was like they fully forgave each other with what happened between them for the past months they’ve known each other “I know… it’s bizarre that everything settled down between them… knowing Donghae it’s not impossible that he’d forgive someone as easy as that but I don’t know about Kyu” Hyuk gave a uncertain feeling about what he was seeing

It was lunch time; both Hyuk and Siwon were waiting for Donghae. “I asked mom to make something for us” he brought out two extra paper bags “Your choice, turkey sandwich or some club house?” he gave Hyuk an option, he heard a hum from him seeing that he was still thinking carefully “Turkey sandwich for me” a hand grabbed what he was about to; startled he looked on the culprit who took it

Landing an eye on his cousin he frowned “Hey, I was the one whose supposed to have it” he whined, “Well… it took you a while to decide so I took the liberty on pick what’s good for you” he pulled out the sandwich, Siwon only giggled “Here, the club house is still a fine choice” he brought the paper bag to Hyuk’s pouting face

“Sometimes I wonder if you really treat me as someone older than you” Hyuk grabbed the bag and took out his sandwich “You know hyung, even if you are older than me… I can still act that I’m the older one between the two of us” he giggled and took a bite on the turkey sandwich, a hum of satisfaction was heard “I’m glad you liked it” Siwon smiled to his him. It was his favorite sight, seeing Donghae smile; satisfied with what he offered, it was a feeling of achieving Hae’s good side

He had a crush on Hae ever since preschool; he knows that he always blushed when he sees him smile. He was aware that if this feeling were to bloom further, he’d end up really falling in love with him but he was afraid of rejection; afraid of being left behind by the guy he had always had the hots on. He knows in himself if Hae were to know what he feels for him, he might be disgusted and move away from him, he didn’t want that to happen. So he convinced himself to suppress that strong feeling he has for the guy, caging it and acting as if he was just a great friend for him. He denied everything

He was smiling brightly at seeing Hae enjoying his treat but it dramatically subsided; his joy died in an instant after seeing Kyu’s face. He had a tray on both hands and sat beside Hae; beside the man that his heart was hungry for attention with, the only guy that made his heart pummel with thrill and anticipation. He didn’t like this one bit. He could practically see the pissed off look on Hyuk’s face, at the back of his mind “At least Hyuk’s with me on this”

They both stared at the younger man sitting in comfort beside Hae, “Here you go, and just like you asked for. I bought us some pizza some drinks and some cream caramel, bon appetite” and damn Siwon was his hands right now but still hid it under the table

He was aware of Kyu’s family profile, they were wealthy but still he was wondering why a rich kid like him was taking his studies on a public high school… well he is, in a way like him, he knows he’s at a rich household as well but he only studied at the same school as Hae because he wants to be with him, see him and loom on the crush he had carried since childhood

“Thanks, but you really didn’t have to” Hae smiled beamingly at the given food, “It’s nothing, don’t be silly. You can always ask me what you want to eat so I could give it to you” he saw an irritating smile on those damn lips “Uh…” he awkwardly reacted recalling that he’s not alone with the guy “By the way, Kyu. These are my friends… well technically hyung here…” he pointed, “Is my cousin and here… is Siwon, he’s a preschool friend of mine” he saw Hae being so embarrassed right of that moment

 He knows the reason; it was because Hae always opened up on them that he really hates Kyu. He didn’t like him because of the fact that they didn’t go along with one another but at this time, it was all different. He’s now treating him as a friend. Feeling bad with Hae’s situation and knowing Hyuk wouldn’t make the move, he broke a forced smile out of his lips “It’s nice to personally meet you mister school president”

He heard a damn chuckle from him “You don’t have to be so formal, just call me Kyu” he reached for a handshake, knowing that it’s only polite to take it, he was truly against it but what the hell. Donghae might feel bad if he wouldn’t go along with this but he’s definitely going to give some explaining for both Hyuk and him, after a few seconds he reached out and shook his hand. Letting go quickly he saw that damn smile again

“Hyung… where’s your manners?” he happened to hear Hae’s whispering to Hyuk “You know why I’m acting up like this” he firmly said, he was glaring at the younger. Deep inside Siwon smirked knowing Hyuk was far too open and would truly show his mood with someone, he wouldn’t hold back on ing at Kyu “Hyung please… he’s a friend now and~” Hyuk shot a mocking chuckle “Friend? That beat you up once when you fought, do you think I’d forgive someone like him after doing something like that to you?” Siwon smiled unconsciously, he likes the scene.

 They both know Hyuk’s attitude, he’s never discreet with people who harms his cousin. People around them may say that Hyuk picks on Hae at time but only Hae and him knows that Hyuk is overly protective with him because he treated Hae as his dearest brother “There’s nothing in this world that could convince me on considering him as a friend” he sternly said

Siwon was about to let out a giggle but “I know me and Donghae had a rough start and I truly regret it, right now. All I ask for is reconciliation; he… saved me from those thugs that outnumbered me but to be honest, I don’t mind hearing from your suggestions or notions. All I care for right now is what Donghae thinks of me” Siwon’s eyes widen as he watched the younger speak up without doubts with his words

“I don’t care if you’d consider me as someone that you’ll revoke nor would I give a damn about it. To state clearly, I’m not your friend, but, I am Donghae’s friend. So no matter how much you look down on me or know my real attitude, I won’t move away from him until he tells me to” Siwon felt himself tremble with a bit of anger and jealousy, “Why would this guy even say something like that to him? He was just saved once; it doesn’t mean he has to commit to their friendship”

Though out of the commotion, he could see Donghae smiling under the tension “There’s no way, some petty words could drive me away from him” he saw a triumphant smirk in his face, “To be honest guys… he’s very kind and thoughtful so, I wouldn’t really consider him someone to hate anymore, besides… I’m now starting to know him better” Hae added, he saw a passive reaction to Hyuk’s face. Peculiar he would’ve strike a fist on the younger’s face if he’d talk like that to him but, no violent reactions were made

“So… if that’s the case then…” they all seemed to anticipate the answer, after a short sigh “Take good care of him alright?” dismayed by the sight of Hyuk’s bright smile, he knows all’s worthless to resist Kyu’s presence. “Don’t worry, you don’t have to remind me” he heard once again the giggle

After that day, it felt like horror filled him. In a way, he found it as a start that Donghae… would no longer be with him, he might be too caught up with the friendship Kyuhyun offered. He might forget what they had “This is crap, he shouldn’t be friends with him… they’re not friends to begin with, he shouldn’t… trust him” he denied the truth that Donghae had opened up to seek a truce between Kyuhyun. He couldn’t handle that thought of losing his companion ship with him, and, he’s not willing to do it at anytime

Right after that lunch time, Siwon talked with Hyuk before going to class “Hyuk, what the hell happened there?” the said man turned to face him “What do you mean?” he gave a puzzled look, “Why did you agree to let Donghae be with him?”
 Hyuk only smiled at him “Because, for me… if Donghae approves and seemed to be really fond of him, then… I’m fine with it…” Siwon felt so disappointed at that statement “But… if he proves his words wrong in taking good care of him, I won’t have second thoughts on landing my fists in his face until he’d bleed to death” it was totally hopeless

3 weeks had passed; Siwon was at the library getting some books for his next class. He was busy on the book’s names as he sought it out on the shelves; he felt a dense feeling around him. He turned around and saw Kyuhyun standing with a passive look in his face and damn it pissed him off but he tried to conceal it “Is there anything I can do for you?” he calmly said

“Nothing much really, can we talk?” he flatly said, “You see, mister president… I have class right after I get some books and~” he felt his wrist being restrained, “I can excuse you… you shouldn’t worry” he found him being dragged out of the library, he wasn’t sure where he was being taken but he hates it. He felt his blood beginning to boil, silently cursing on the younger that’s leading him to some secluded place

They got to a deserted classroom; surely it wasn’t for the regular classes. He noticed that the room looked familiar, it struck him, and it was the classroom for the student who attended special classes. It was surely a classroom that wouldn’t be bothered by any students until it was the end of class. “What’s going on?” he said in a low voice

“I don’t think we need to act like two idiots here… you know why” he sharply said; deep inside Siwon really knows what he was talking about but he wasn’t going to discuss anything with him, especially if it’s just the two of them. “I’m sorry minster president but… I really don’t have any idea on what you’re trying to point out here… if there is something please do elaboratefor me” Kyu’s eyes narrowed

“Let’s cut to the chase, stop your stupid crush on Donghae… I mean it” it tore a fracture of Siwon’s heart to hear his demand “W-What…~” Kyu sat at a desk “You know exactly what I’m saying so stop this dumb act and knock it off with your silly fantasies that Donghae would love you back” at a snap, it made Siwon furious with what he was saying

His heart was racing, blood still boiling and his fist clenching “Don’t think that you became Donghae’s friend means that I’ll do your bidding, I would never do what you say to me… I would never think of leaving his side… I would never… stop loving him!” he retorted, Kyu’s eyes only sent daggers onto him “You’re depriving yourself for your own good. Being stuck in a silly thought like that would never lead you to anything… if you truly love him, you would’ve made a move, told the truth or ever showing how much you do… but, you only cower on this dull feeling”

Siwon felt himself tremble with rage as he rushed towards the damn clam look on the younger’s face. He gripped his shirt up and glared him, anger evident in his eyes while his breathing was heavy and fast “Stop being a stupid guy and give up… he doesn’t deserve you… he deserves me” like a ton of bricks fell into him, his reason for this talk was to claim Donghae?

“I don’t care how long was that crush of yours lived, I don’t know how much passion you have but what I do know is it’s a foolish attempt to even try and pursue someone that will never return your feelings” he gulped “Shut up! What do you know? What’s so special about you to even think that Donghae would even fall for you!” he yelled at him without second thoughts, “Because I know… he loves me” the damn confidence he was showing was practically killing his ego

His heart began to shatter but he was still trying to place back the pieces “No… there’s no certainties that he would love you… don’t be full of yourself because… he will never love someone like you!” he continued to scream irrationally

“Really…? I’ve already foresaw the possibilities, his reactions, his attentions and his desire. It was all evidently clear, he loves me more than he’ll ever love you” not a single emotion was seen in the younger’s face; it was odd that someone who was spouting about claiming their love with someone act so lifeless “Stand down… and let me bring him to his fate. He’s mine to begin with to be honest” he couldn’t take it, he crumbled at the statement

“There’s no possible way that… he would love an like you!” he mustered back his strength and gave Kyu a punch at the left of his cheek. It was a strong punch but since Kyu was already used to fighting, it meant nothing. He only made the younger take a step back at the strong impact. Siwon dropped on the floor with shaking body; he was being degraded to stop his undying crush once and for all. It was nothing he would ever render

He then turned his eyes towards Kyu, he saw a spark of pity on those deep set of eyes. “You can still love him… but you can never exceed too much of a loving friend” that’s where Siwon lost it all, his hopes and chances was diminishing completely. He heard Kyu walk towards the door; he felt the footsteps stop “I’ll still consider you as a friend… but never Donghae’s lover your no threat to me” with that he was completely left alone inside the room. Sobbing in pain with the loss of his determination to love Hae, maybe he was right?

After three days, he became more and more distant from Kyuhyun. He didn’t care if he’d evade Donghae at the process, he didn’t want to face any of them at that time. He lost everything. He was busy getting himself ready before he goes to the parking lot until “Hyung… can we talk?” a familiar voice spoke, he turned as saw Donghae. His heart nearly dropped at the sight “I really want to talk to you about this”

They were at the school’s terrace, it was nearly sundown and the light that was radiating was all orange. They sat at the corner looking at the sunset, they didn’t look at each other nor have they spoken yet. Siwon was a bit scared. “Did he tell Donghae about my feelings for him?” he felt a certain suspicion. “Hyung… I’m confused” he then spoke out to start the conversation

He looked at him and it was true, his facial expression was all blank. His eyes didn’t know how to keep still while his hands seem to shake. He was concerned of what was going on inside Donghae’s eyes “About what?” he continued on, “We’ve been friends since preschool… heck, we practically grew up together… and right now. I want to say sorry” it was an unpredictable statement on what he was apologizing for “Sorry for what?” he questioned out of the curiosity

He turned to face him and a soft yet weak looking smile came out “For not returning your love for me” like a standstill in time, he froze. “I know it’s very hard to understand… I want to be honest… I really can’t… give to you the love that your trying to give me, you know me… but not all of me” Siwon felt his mouth dry out, as much as he wanted to scream out that Kyuhyun had revealed his feelings for him and tell him that it was a lie to prevent their friendship to die. He couldn’t, he was temporarily mute

“I can tell you some things about me, be with you and create memories together but… that’s something between us and there’s some things that I only want to say to the person I love…” he pause with what he was saying, a last, he finally found the strength to muster out his words “What… what do you mean? Donghae… if Kyuhyun’s spouting words about me being in love with you that’s a God damn lie… that’s a in~” he felt Hae’s hands hold his face

He calmed down from the sudden hold, easing slowly down his beloved’s hands “No one told me anything… I knew this ever since we started middle school… I knew from that time, how much you really loved me. I’m not naïve to not know it because you always show it, you always make me feel so much loved” Siwon’s eyes began to soften and slowly tears threatening to fall at any moment

“We both know… that were not for each other… because in truth… I’ve already fallen in love…”

“Hey guys, how’s the rest of the vacation?” Siwon asked them and it was lunch time, “Mine wasn’t all that boring but still… I’m quite pissed on being at home at most” Hyuk muttered on his table

He chuckled, “Well how ‘bout you two?” he eyed on Kyuhyun and Donghae sitting rather comfortably together, if he hadn’t known the two for quite a while, he would have sworn that they were blushing at his question. Which was definitely true but the two seemed to have covered it up quite well. Facing away from each other, “Oh… well… it’s been fine I guess” Kyu said in a rather suspicious tone of voice, “Yeah… I’ve done some things… it helped me all throughout the summer time…” Hae chuckled forcefully

His eyes narrowed at the way the two was acting up so weird, “Well… how ‘bout you hyung? How’s your vacation outside the country?” Hyuk diverted the conversation to him. “Yeah… I-I want to know how you spent your vacation outside the country!” he tried to be eager with the topic “Yeah… I strongly agree, we should hear something about your trip” Kyu supported

Chuckling on how obvious the two were, “I had a wonderful vacation at Paris, we went along the Arch de triumph and since our place was just near the Eiffel tower, we all got some wonderful photos under it and also at the top of it. It was fun” they all seemed to be impressed, though he knows that Kyu had already been there “Stop acting Kyu, you’ve been there too” both Hyuk and Hae shot their eyes on him, “You have?” Hyuk was a bit shocked

“You haven’t told me that you had been there” Hae added in a rather disappointed tone, “A-Aish… hyung! You didn’t have to tell them… and besides, I haven’t gone to the Arch de triumph then… I saw the Eiffel tower but… I really never got to roam around since I was still a kid then” he felt embarrassed and to boot Siwon laughed at him “Well the fact still remained that you had gone there” he noted

“But it’s not like your experience… you were able to enjoy it!” he fended “No fair Kyuhyun-ah, you didn’t tell me about it” Hae pouted “I-I never really had a good memory about it back then… I only remembered the tower and that’s that” he was trying to make up for Hae’s little tantrum

“But still… you didn’t told me anything” he looked away from the younger “B-But~” Siwon interrupted once more “Had he also told you about him being at Rome?” it made Hae’s eyes widen and snapped his head back to Kyu, “Damn it Cho Kyuhyun-ah! You told me that you’ve always dreamed of going to Rome… what the is this now!?” he yelled at him and making the latter panic

“I… but… Siwon… no… it’s not… ugh!” he grunted as he wasn’t able to think quickly, both Siwon and Hyuk laughed at the two. It was evident that they shared each other’s dream and not letting Donghae know about those surely pisses him off. As the two tried to sort things out between them, Hyuk nudged Siwon by the elbow “So… do you think these two are fine? You know that I’m still looking at them seriously” a soft yet audible voice Hyuk gave out “I have full trust on Kyu… I know we could” he smiled as he looked at the table, Hyuk only nodded

Though Hyuk had given a friendly companionship towards Kyu, he was still eyeing on him. Deciding, thinking and judging that love he’s showing for Donghae. Siwon can’t blame him, he’s the cousin of all he knows and Hyuk will do anything to protect Donghae. That’s why Hyuk judged him before Kyuhyun even entered their circle of friendship. Maybe there are things that Hyuk is still not convinced with; things that might be seen in a different way felt by some certain way or think in an elaborated way, nothing was sure but a fact remained inside his head “Is he worth trusting Donghae?”

After last class, Siwon immediately spoke with Kyu “Got a minute?” he asked, the younger only nodded. They made their way towards the classroom “This the same place…” Kyu trailed off reminiscing the time “It’s the best place… to talk, cry and recollect. So… I’ve been meaning to ask about this Kyu” Kyu felt the seriousness inside the question

He faced the elder, “How’re you and Donghae right now?” it made the younger gulp at the sudden question, he looked away feeling himself blush. It only made Siwon smile “We’re doing fine…” he smiled as he continued to face the floor, “Has he given up now?” Kyu shook his head knowing the meaning of the question “He’s quite a bit hard to crack but… were getting there” Siwon sat at the same desk like Kyu did before “You know exactly what to do right?” he saw a nod

“I guess… you were really right about things” he placed his arm around Kyu’s shoulder, “No… it’s not a guess… you are right about what you said and I’m thankful that someone like you loved Donghae this much” Kyu looked up on him, seeing a generous smile “I know you can do it… I’m here for you okay?”

“I’ve finally fallen for someone” he’s eyes were wet and a part of him was telling him how sorry he was “I don’t know how to get this feeling to an order but I know clearly… that I’m in love” in a way it was truly painful but half of him was feeling wonderful, it felt wonderful because Donghae had made up his feelings to settle his heart on someone he founds suitable

“I-I understand… I won’t blame you, you have all the rights to choose who to love” he managed to bring out a smile, “I truly apologize; I know how much you feel for me… I’m just… so horrible to not return anything~” Siwon embraced him, he did it for two reasons, he understands and he doesn’t want him to explain any further “Shush… no need for that… hyung can always work through this, you know me right?” Hae nodded in his statement

“I really understand you… so please… don’t hurt yourself… I don’t like seeing you go like this” he whispered softly behind his ear, his hand on the younger’s back “I’m… happy for you” that was the moment Siwon felt the first drop of tear in his eyes

After their exchange of hugs, they parted “That person must be quite lucky to captivate that heart of yours” sniffed as he felt his nose a bit runny “You might say that… or probably you could say that I’m lucky to have him” in a way Siwon was surprised, “Who… is it?”

“Bye hyung!” Kyuhyun waved at him as he got inside his car and as he looked at the front seat, Donghae was also waving at him, he smiled at the two “Both of you take care alright!?” he yelled for them to hear. Donghae nodded while Kyu gave him a signal, thumbs up. As they drove away, watching them go, he felt his heart flutter at the sight. Through a portion of him would still ache at the sight, he knows it, he still has some feeling for Donghae but it’s not as deep as it was before. It did no longer desire to exceed what they have been reduced and will forever remain as a love… for a dear friend

“Although I don’t approved at you Kyu before… I’ve watched you change, you’ve mold yourself to become something worth loving him and be loved back, take good care of him… just like you promised me alright?” he whispered as the sight of their car slowly drifted away

“It’s Kyuhyun-ah” he confidently said as he smiled to the elder

“You really know how to make a guy fall in love with you huh?” he chuckled at what he said, even if it meant being a friend with someone he truly loved since entire childhood. He’d still cope with it knowing Hae would benevolently be loved by the younger’s strong and passionate feeling for him