“You do realize what you are doing is often, in the law, referred to as stalking, do you not?” Aron asked him, his foreign accent washing over him, but Ren was no longer focusing on his words. After all, he had heard them, if not the exact words, but the gist of it, every Saturday morning for as long as he could remember. Every other day for as long as he could remember he stared at a picture of his long lost love, drowning himself.

Ren didn’t know when it had started, and he couldn’t tell you when it would stop. The obsession, that is. He could tell you here and now that he had first shown up at the little café facing the intersection of Fifth and Second streets on January 5th two years ago. However, if the only unknowing member of this party stopped showing up, Ren could assure you he would break down in tears. The silent rejection would be just too much to handle. Not…that the silent member, otherwise known as Baekho, had any earthly idea that Ren still wanted him.

Ren could only blame himself for the state of things. Ren had always been demanding, paranoid, and headstrong, a dangerous combination for any relationship. Ren had been raised by a highly feministic single mother and been told in no uncertain terms he “Wasn’t to take crap from anybody.” So Ren had lived by the rules of never forgiving, and never forgetting, only doing as he had been taught, following the principles he had been raised under. For some reason, whilst this worked wonders on his friendships, relationships altogether failed. Miserably.

But Ren was never heartbroken, oh no, that would be showing weakness. That would be showing you cared two cents about the person who didn’t realize what a find he was. He never let anything get to him, having found his sense of confidence in both appearance and his actions early on in life. He never let anything allow him to stray from his ideals. Until a man by the name of Kang Baekho came along.

Baekho was too sweet for words, and had the body of a Greek god. A combination anyone, straight or not, was bound to instantly fall for. Not that Ren had ever been straight in any sense of the word, he’d always known who and what he was. They had hit it off perfectly, and within a month of their first meeting, they were quite happily dating one another. Everything had been perfect, and they both secretly  hoped and prayed that the other was ‘the one.’

Then, swayed by both the effects of liquor, a dare, and the desire to help a friend in need (and a good deal of not-much-choice-in-the-matter) Baekho found himself kissed by his friend JR. Baekho, being sensible and knowing how his boyfriend was, deigned to keep silent on the matter. JR had needed the kiss to more obviously come out to his crush that he was indeed also gay, when he couldn’t seem to speak the words. On any other day Baekho would have denied him, and been on his merry way with the beautiful blond boy that was the love of his life. But that just wasn't how it worked out. Of course Ren had been watching. Ren had cried himself to sleep, not understanding the reasons behind the kiss and not caring to learn either way.

Ren sipped his coffee with shaking hands in the present time as the memories of the past wash over him, as they did every Saturday. He remembered so clearly the moment he had so pigheadedly broken everything off. Crushed them both to pieces, though Ren wasn’t to know the effects of his words upon his own heart until much later.

“BAEKHO!” Ren yelled, standing in the middle of the crowded hallway, where he had been waiting for the past half hour.

“Ren?” Baekho turned, surprised to see his boyfriend at his college, never having seen the other grace the halls of his learning place ever before. His face broke into a smile, that was quickly wiped away when he beheld the furious expression of the boy Baekho suddenly had the sinking feeling wasn’t going to be in a relationship with him much longer.

“So. I get it now. You’re whole ‘College studies first’ thing, was just a way to avoid me and spend some time with your lover,” Ren’s voice was loud and condescending and many people on their way to other classes stopped to watch the drama.

“W-what?” Baekho paled, and this only served to convince Ren even more of the other’s infidelity.

“You bastard. I thought you actually cared about me! And then I walk in on you kissing JR when you’re supposed to be studying? I was going to visit you, make you a cake and spend some quality time with you since you’re supposedly sooo busy with exams you can’t see me half the time I want you to! Now the truth comes out, doesn’t it?” Ren was shaking with fury as he worked himself up into a frenzy,

“I just don’t get it! I’m so much better than him!” Ren knew he was going to have to cut his tirade short as he spied the hall monitor come sweeping down the corridor, intent on removing the disturbance – namely the girly looking boy publically breaking up with his boyfriend. Ren was just going to add one more stinging comment before he went. Ignoring Baekho’s protestations, he said, "I'm beautiful, hell I'm gorgeous. You’re going to figure out real soon how much I’m worth, and then you’re really going to regret it. So have a good time staring at my as I walk away, knowing it could have been yours, and now never will be. Goodbye."

And then he had left, disappearing into the masses of students, knowing Baekho tried to race after him. No doubt trying to catch him to convince Ren otherwise of what he already knew perfectly well was the truth. He strode out the doors, hating himself for the droplets that streamed down his perfect pale cheeks, and vowing that he’d never let anyone affect him in such a way, ever again.

It had been hardly a week after that, when Ren had begun to show up at the café. He didn’t know why. But he had stopped asking himself only hours after the breakup why he cared so much, when he really shouldn’t. He had settled on the fact that he couldn’t help it. He had fallen, just as his mother had warned him he would. Ren had realized over the past two years, during what Aron less than poetically referred to as ‘stalking,’ that he was never going to give up. That he really did truly love Baekho. There was, however, a 'but' to this whole equation. He did love Baekho...He just couldn’t get up the courage, just couldn’t bend his pride, both things required for him to let Baekho know his true feelings.

So here he sat. Ren felt the anticipation build, knowing that the one he loved would be walking out of the court house any moment now. Ren knew that Baekho wanted to be a lawyer just as soon as he finished grad school, and he also knew that he had an internship with the legal business just across the street. Baekho walked across the intersection of Fifth and Second every Saturday morning at almost exactly eight AM. That was only one minute from now...30 seconds...15 seconds...

Ren sat up as he saw the door open, watched with a hammering heart as Baekho, deep in conversation with another boy Ren knew (from a few innocent web searches) went by the name of Minhyun. He and Baekho worked together on internships for the same company. Baekho was dressed stylishly in a dark trench coat, collar turned up against the strong wind that whipped his blond hair into his dark hazel eyes. He watched with narrowed eyes as Minhyun pulled something from his coat pocket…a tiny black box. Fear suddenly clutched at Ren’s heart before he even truly realized what was happening. As Minhyun flipped the lid on the box Ren knew before he even saw the glittering ring, what was happening. The emotional gaze of Baekho as he embraced the man, taking the box from Minhyun in the process, tore Ren’s heart in half, then quarters, eighths…pieces too small to count, as he watched threw the window.

And then Ren was running, pushing past customers in line, out into the street, ignoring the honks from the horns as he ran through the