It’s New Year’s Eve in chez Himchan and will be New Year’s Day in about one minute. Everyone’s bunched up in his tiny living room, half of us on couches and half of us on the floor. Himchan was a ing genius for inviting more than what his apartment can handle.

               Due to tight spaces I found myself wedged in between Yongguk and – well, what do you know? Jung Daehyun.

               It’s New Year’s Eve in chez Himchan and will be New Year’s Day in about twenty more seconds.

               I suddenly feel hands on my cheeks and a sudden adrenaline rush peaks up through my spine and jolts my neck.

               It’s New Year’s Eve in chez Himchan and Daehyun suddenly decides that it’s okay to try to kiss me.

               It’s New Year’s Eve in chez Himchan and instead of getting what he wants, Jung Daehyun instead receives a slap to the cheek to start off the New Year.

               ---

               The differences between the ways people smile can stand out quite a lot. Especially if you’re as meticulous as I am, and to achieve that level you must be a complete and utter bum. Though it seems like there’s not much left to fix in that area…

               I’m kidding. I love you.

               Maybe.

               I find that sometimes, when conversations start to stray off into the section called “boring” and my interest meter dials down to nothing, I end up observing the way people talk or smile. It’s not that it’s interesting in any way, (in fact, it’s actually quite boring – more so since I’m already bored by then) it’s just that there’s nothing else to do and I don’t want to seem rude. Because I am totally a respectful person.

               Yongguk is the kind of guy that comes across as a thug at first, someone who is most likely willing to steal your lunch money in high school and/or steal your girl because his swag is off the charts. One would expect to see him hanging out in the alleyways after class with guns and broken bottles, sideways cap on and tattoos up and down his arms. Instead, one should expect to see him hanging out in his apartment after class with pencils and notebooks, sideways cap on and marker scribbles up and down his arms because sometimes his baby cousin comes to visit.

               He’s a gummy bear, basically. Studious, creative, somewhat of a daydreamer, and is always thinking about something philosophic and inspirational that could make one shed a tear. His smile shows this quite well.

               His smile is gummy – as in literally, because hell you can see his both sets of his teeth and the pretty pinks of his gums when he smiles. It gets so big sometimes that he actually covers those pearls with the back of his hand. His smile reminds me of a friendly shark. I think that’s one accurate description of the guy.

               Usually when he smiles it’s out of embarrassment or shyness; embarrassment because my jokes, Himchan’s jokes, everyone’s jokes ing and he probably believes hanging out with thugs would be more interesting than us. Shyness because it’s pretty easy to embarrass him; just mention women’s legs and this guy will be smiling. Now that I think about it, is that really shyness? Or is there more to Yongguk than I had observed? Probably. The guy is a thug and is not meant to be messed with.

               To sum it up, Yongguk has that gummy, contagious, sometimes shy, nice guy smile that he uses when he’s either laughing, is uncomfortable, or utterly confused. This smile seems to appear often whenever he hangs out with us lot. I don’t find that surprising.

               Jongup is rarely seen without a smile. It’s probably just his face. He probably smiles while he poops.

               Dancing smile, eye smile, adorable smile, staring-at-you smile, judging-you smile, ew-get-Himchan-away-from-me smile, Chris-Brown-Hyung smile: Moon Jongup has a smile for everything. And to be quite honest with you, it can be a bit creepy at times, especially when you catch Jongup smiling directly at you just as you finished taking a tinkle at a urinal.

               But something about Jongup’s smile just screams perfect, and I find myself wanting to brush my teeth every time I spot him smiling at me.

               Junhong’s smile is cute and innocent at times, but can turn mischievous and downright creepy. It’s obvious something bad has happened when Junhong’s smile is on the mischievous side of the scale. Oh, your house is burning down? Check out Junhong’s smile.

               He has the same “ew hyung” smile Jongup has, along with an amused one and a sadistic one. This kid literally seems like the type who’s nice and cuddly at first, but offend him once and he’s microwaving a chinchilla at home. Beware.

               Himchan’s smile is something I absolutely loathe. Sort of. He has this foxy, smug eye smile that shows off his precious bunny teeth. He mostly uses this smile when he’s ruining my life. He has his I’m-so-perfect smile and his greasy, flirtatious smile. To top those off he sometimes does this weird lip-biting thing. He usually smiles when he sees other people’s pain and every time he looks in the mirror.

               Jaebum’s smile is charming, cute, joyful, contagious, and can’t get any more perfect than it is. I will for his smile.

               Everything about him is just perfect and amazing, and sometimes I just want to marry his smile (evidently it is attached to his face, which is attached to his body, so it’s basically the same thing as marrying him anyways). He smirks often enough; enough to throw you into the danger zone of falling. He’s that charming boy in math class that laughs and smiles a lot, with charming, flirtatious eyes that scream “rawr, hello there.”

               His smile could cure cancer, possibly (if science looked hard enough). It’s something that can just make you happy even though he might have just stolen your wallet. It’s something I’d be glad to see even if I had just finished taking a tinkle at the urinal.

               Who have I forgotten to include so far? I think it’s quite obvious; he seems to appear a lot these days. It’s a sickening trend that I can’t quite get out of.

               Jung Daehyun possesses a stupid, confident smile that is impossible to slap off his face. It can be flirtatious or predatory, depending on how one would interpret those smiles since he is a player, and players deserves to burn. It’s sleazy and cocky when he catches you staring at him, which is a smile I unfortunately receive often. He believes that when my gaze trails away from his eyes and drops to his lips, it’s a sign that says I want to kiss him or something – which is totally untrue.

               A thing that comes with being Jung Daehyun is that he just can’t seem to help but tease anyone and anything out there with a face. It seems relatively natural to him, to just go ahead and tease the out of an innocent girl blushing madly at every compliment he throws out to her or to a who puffs their s out upon hearing every suggestive whisper. His blinding smirk is what throws me off every time he directs it towards me.

               There’s something charming and suggestive in the way he smirks, as if he knows something I don’t. I had woken him up from a nap once during Himchan’s New Year’s party, and the sleepy grin I had received from the guy was admittedly y, teasing – and the way his voice slurred out, dabbed with sleepiness, topped off with a rough coat was enough to send unpleasant shivers down my spine.

               A smile I didn’t catch often on his face was his awkward, nervous smile. It’s one he rarely uses, since Jung Daehyun is rarely embarrassed. Everything about him screams confident, from the way he walks to the way he blinks. Sometimes I want to scream at him because he strikes me as the kind of guy that doesn’t have to take any effort in the morning to look good. It’s not fair.

               Catching him with that rare smile is something I take pride in doing, especially since peeling it out of him is worth all the cocky comebacks or lame jokes. I sometimes find it cute, the way he stares down at the ground with a silly smile on his face after he’s done something stupid. He does stupid things all the time, but it’s rare to find him actually embarrassed about one of them.

               Whenever Daehyun jokes, he’s his own studio background laughter track. He’s the laughs, he’s the claps; he’s his own personal fan. He laughs quite often, and the sound is similar to that of a ringing bell. It’s a sound that sticks into my ears in a way I don’t appreciate, but also in a way I feel no need to bother with. If it’s there, I let it be.

               His smile can be dreamy at times, I can admit. Especially when he’s staring at me in a soft yet intense way, one that leaves me a bit nervous and my palms a bit sweaty. There’s something in his stare, his smile that I don’t see when he looks at other people. I might be delusional, which I probably am after being such a detail-freak.

               To put things simply, the thing about Daehyun is that his smile is dreamy, and he knows it. So he uses it. What I can’t seem to figure out, however, is whether or not that is bad thing.

               But his smile’s still stupid, though.

               ---

               I have done a dumb.

               But it was a beautiful dumb.

               Himchan was currently running down the hallways with an aching and most probably an to match. It was my pride and pleasure that morning upon meeting Himchan at his door with complaints about his broomstick to kick him in the nuts (as expected), but to also shove my foot right up his . His screams were annoying and he called me stupid.

               But I am a beautiful kind of stupid.

               So now I was running down the hallways with a limping Himchan not too far away. Though I could easily out run him in his state, I decided not to. Hearing his shrieks of anger and misery is pleasing to a sadistic freak like me.

               But it was when Himchan started speeding up did I start to panic. I still had never gotten laid and the sound of a foot going up my is not something I’d like to experience. So I ran faster, and when Himchan started closing in dangerously close I somehow managed to slip away by jumping into an elevator just before it closed (which is an unsafe thing to do, kids. Don’t try this at home). I smacked a random number and exploded through when the doors reopened. Then out of sheer panic that Himchan might have somehow followed me, I slipped through a random door someone had left open. This was an invasion of privacy, obviously, but a man with sore nuts and can be a scary, scary man.

               Especially if that man is Kim Himchan.

               I hadn’t realized whose apartment I had just walked into while closing the door – no, not until a muffled voice singing Whitney Houston accompanied by the sounds of crunching chips walked in, an abrupt pause in the famous high note when I turned around. Daehyun is the only person on earth who could possibly pull off high notes while stuffing their face with chips.

               He still had no shirt on.

               “I knew leaving the door open would attract insects…”

               I grabbed the umbrella wedged in the corner and threatened to hit him with it.

               Daehyun put his hands up (and chip bag) in defense. “I was kidding! Please put the umbrella down, you’re making me nervous…”

               I jerked forward a bit just to watch him flinch before setting the object back down where it was before, leaning back against the door to catch my breath from the run. My hand slipped up the door’s smooth surface and to the knob, firmly locking the thing to make sure Himchan didn’t burst his way in.

               “So, uh, mind telling me exactly why you are in my apartment?” Daehyun asked cautiously, stepping closer with his bag of chips held up as a shield. “Not that I don’t appreciate it or anything, I mean, surprise is cool and—“

               I put a hand up to stop him from getting any further. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. I was protecting myself from Kim Himchan and saw the opportunity to hide. Your fault for leaving the door opened.”

               “Dae sweetie~”

               I jumped at the new voice, a very feminine, high-pitched voice that made me cringe. I did not recognize this one, but for a second there I did believe that it was Himchan on helium.

               In runs a pretty girl, dressed up in an over-sized white dress shirt and black skinny jeans. Her brown hair was quite short, but suited her nicely. She did lack in size, however – dear lord, pray for her.

               Daehyun seemed startled by the voice as well, as if not expecting to hear it at all. Just as he turned around to greet her, the girl ran up and tackled him in a hug, littering kisses all over his face. They tumbled onto the floor, the entire ground shaking a bit due to the force. The weird noises she made left me awkwardly standing there by the door, only staring like a lame loser. Or a child locked out of Christmas, but trust me, that over there was not Christmas.

               I was just about to comment, but Daehyun beat me to it. He awkwardly pushed the girl off of himself and leaned upwards from where they had fallen on the floor, his chip bag crushed and sticking onto his . He groaned softly and pulled the crackling bag off, tossing it to the side. “Although I’d love another , please notice that there is another person in the room.” He turned pointedly to me.

               The girl followed his eyes, finally noticing my tense presence by the door. I brought a stiff hand up to wave. “Hi.”

               She merely scoffed, staring at me distastefully before fixing her attention back onto Daehyun. “Just tell him to leave.”

               Well then. Excuuuse me.

               “I can’t just do that. He’s hiding from someone,” Daehyun murmured, pushing her off and standing up. He dusted off his boxers as he said, “Plus you should probably get going by now, I have classes later and…stuff…”

               “What?!” she shrieked melodramatically – a sound completely unwelcomed so early in the morning. Her eyes widened as she shot up from the floor. “I remember you clearly stating last night that you didn’t—“

               “I lied,” he said through gritted teeth, last syllable stretched out as if there were a second meaning to that. I ignored this conversation and instead turned towards the door again.

               “I should just leave, you two obviously want to be alone—“

               “Ye—“

               “No,” Daehyun said again, glaring at the girl this time. She puffed her lips out and crossed her arms. Daehyun nudged her shoulder. “I have stuff to do later. You can just…go.”

               “What if I don’t want to?” she asked with an innocent tone, her eyes suggestive as she leaned a little closer to the Busan . Apparently this was her second attempt to sleep with him in the presence of another. All of a sudden I wondered if that girl was a star – what if Daehyun was star? All my questions would be answered then.

               “Well, I guess that for you.” Daehyun grabbed her shoulders and started walking her towards the front door himself. He scooted me over and opened the door, gently pushing her out of the apartment. “Bye~!”

               “What?! You can’t just kick me—“ He slammed the door; the high-pitched squeal that resounded afterwards caused both of us to flinch. We still heard her muffled shrieks from the other side: “Whatever! Call me, babe~!!”

               Daehyun locked the door, turning towards me awkwardly. “Sorry about that.”

               I blinked, nearly forgetting that I was in the room myself, too. “Uh…nice girl you have there…”

               Daehyun’s apologetic stare suddenly flipped into an amused one before he started laughing by himself, bending backwards just a bit to force more out. It was a guffaw, a weird one, and it left me completely confused and a tad bit angry because apparently Daehyun knew something that I did not. “Girl? Youngjae, that girl happened to be a man.”

               …And apparently that thing was that.

               I stared at him for a moment, wondering if he had anything else to say on the matter. Truthfully, I was embarrassed. Pink dusted my cheeks – which is cool because pink is in fact a manly color – in a way so obvious that Daehyun’s smirk grew bigger. It was a stupid mistake. I had even noticed that the “girl” lacked s; apparently he lacked s. Something that men tend to do…

               I wanted to apologize to that guy from earlier but realized that he was probably too far away by now; plus I’d most likely run into Himchan down the hall again. Nope, not a risk I’m willing to take. So I settled for apologizing to Daehyun.

               Sorta.

               “Well , how was I supposed to know? The looked like a pansy.”

               “I agree on that,” Daehyun said, smiling as he sat down on his couch, legs spread out and arms draped against the back of the couch. What a manly posture. Jung Daehyun is a manly man. “I like boys and girls the same, especially pretty boys.”

               Guess that answers why he likes himself so much.

               “The way you say that makes you sound like a e.” I shivered. He probably was.

               Daehyun scoffed. “Not into ography, thank you very much.”

               “Pretty boys?” I repeated the part from earlier, ignoring his last statement. I understood what he had said a bit too late. He looked up at me. “What’s wrong with normal boys?”

               “I need something nice to look at when I’m shagging, man. Not taking a big-nosed tool.” Speak for yourself.

               I scrunched my nose up and crossed my arms, glaring at him. “How very ignorant of you. I think you need a vanity check.”

               “You’re a pretty boy.”

               I chose to ignore that statement and the way I sort of froze up for a second back there. “” was all I could mutter as I took a seat on the couch opposite from the one Daehyun was seated on. I crossed my leg over the other and hugged myself, attempting not to look too out of place. This place gave me the creeps. There was something hard underneath the cushion. Something I most likely would not want to see.

               “Are you free later?” Daehyun suddenly asked, his left leg bouncing up and down absentmindedly. I focused my attention onto that and shrugged. A pet peeve of mine is when someone does exactly what Jung Daehyun was doing, and it took all the willpower I had in my body not to throw myself at him and stop his leg from bouncing. I would if it was anyone else other than Daehyun, but since Daehyun is Dickhyun then I’d rather not attempt doing anything the slightest bit suggestive.

               “Well I was wondering if you’d like to go out for dinner with me.”

               My eyes snapped up to meet his, those endless brown orbs staring deeply into mine. I felt a tiny part of me inside slowly start to fade, causing me to feel a tiny bit dizzy before I snapped out of it, looking away again. I blinked to make sure my vision was clear before I replied:

               “With you? No thanks.”

               I guess the way I had said it was a little bit too harsh and colder than I had expected it to come out as; especially when I saw the way Daehyun’s posture slumped just a bit more, his pupils slightly changing in gloss and size in a certain way that was totally not Daehyun. I was about to say something like no offense until there was a fierce knock on the door.

               “JUNG DAEHYUN?! OPEN UP! I KNOW YOUNG-ING-JAE IS IN THERE.” Thud thud. It literally sounded like he was throwing his body at the door. “OPEN UP!!”

               Daehyun spared one more unreadable glance at me before pushing himself up onto his feet, stretching a bit and making his way down to the door. Out of panic, I dramatically throw myself at him and cling onto his arm, tugging on it to keep him from going any farther. Daehyun stared at me wide-eyed for a moment before the look turned skeptical. He glanced at the door, then at me, then tried to reach for the doorknob again.

               “No! Please!” I yelled, pulling on his arm harder, my grip on it tightening. “For the love of ice cream please, please, please don’t open that door!” I begged, dropping to my knees (contemptuous, of course. You know me). An angry Himchan is an annoying Himchan, as well as a scary one. “Unless you want to see my guts splattered all over the place, I suggest you keep that door closed. Pleasseee!”

               Daehyun breathes out an airy chuckle, shaking his head as he gazed down at me through his brown locks that had fallen over his eyes. “Cute,” is what he says as he turns for the door again.

               “I’ll do anything! Anything!” I pleaded, eyes growing wider as I ignored the blow to my pride. I am not cute, okay? I mean, I’m cute when I want to be, but not when I’m begging. No I am the ing king of the world. I am not cute. Kings can beg, too. But not cutely.

               Dickhyun seemed to consider this for a moment. He turned back to me with a wide smirk on his face. He flicked his bangs out of his eyes as he helped me back up to my feet. “I’ll keep that door closed if you go out on a date with me.”

               “What? Hell no.” I crossed my arms again and turned away, scoffing. That was a trade not worth doing. Dealing with Himchan seemed a lot more appealing than going out with Daehyun, no matter how harsh that sounded. Don’t get me wrong, Daehyun is an okay guy, but the fact that he is a player and a manwhore turned me off.

               Immediately after I said this Daehyun’s expression dropped again in a way that made me almost regret what I said. By now he was equally distanced between the door and me. I watched his every move as he turned to glance at each destination before making his final decision and going for the door. Of course.

               After a few more moments, he opened it – only enough to show himself. However I was able to catch a glimpse of Himchan’s face – and let me tell you, it was not pretty. It happened to be one of those rare moments where Himchan didn’t care about his appearance, but more about brutally mutilating his prey. What did I tell you? Scary.

               I opened my mouth to spew out curses at both males standing by the door, but Daehyun – once again – beat me to it.

               “Hi hyung,” he said, voice ordinary and casual. “What’s wrong?”

               “I know you have Youngjae in there,” Himchan hissed, and I could tell he was pointing accusingly at Dickhyun. “Hand him over.”

               I watched with mild curiosity as Daehyun shrugged and shook his head. “He’s not here, sorry. He was earlier, but left a while ago. Probably heading to Jongup and Junhong’s, maybe.”

               Himchan puts one finger up to argue but doesn’t seem to know what to say next. Slowly that finger falls back down. “But I…he couldn’t have! Not without me seeing him…”

               Daehyun shrugs again. “Sorry hyung.” He then closes the door softly, and I hear Himchan cursing to himself and me, voice slowly lowering in volume before fading away completely.

               Daehyun – Dickhyun – whatever his name was locks the door and turns around to face me again. He gives me a slight smile before heading towards his kitchen.

               I am now confused.

               “…and then he closed the door and just smiled? What the ? What was he trying to do? Why is it that all of a sudden he acts likes he knows more than I do? What am I missing here?” I spewed out questions like a machine gun, wildly aiming my bullets at Yongguk who only smiled listening to the story I had just shared with him as we slowly walked down the stairs. “Stop smiling!” I smacked his arm.

               Yongguk chuckled, shaking his head in an “Oh, my naïve little dongsaeng” way. Sometimes I hated Yongguk because it was just so hard to hate him. “You know your friendship with Daehyun has been quite interesting these past couple of months. I think I could probably write a rap about your weird, confusing little relationship.” He nodded his head, mouthing words as if he were already coming up with the lyrics.

               Yongguk makes good songs. Really good songs. All of them are amazing and meaningful and touching and beautiful. If he were to throw me and Daehyun in there crickets would explode, and his future albums wouldn’t sell as well. Who the hell wants to listen to a brat complain about a ?

               “You’d make no money,” I murmured flatly, glaring at the grinning male beside me.

               Yongguk shrugged, adjusting the ear buds in his ear as he nodded his head to the beat of the music. “You said Daehyun invited you to dinner, right?” I nodded. “Why did you refuse?”

               I stared at him incredulously, as if what he had just said was the stupidest thing in the world. It might as well quite possibly be, actually. To me at least. “I don’t like him. Going to dinner with him would just be torture.”

               Yongguk scoffed disbelievingly. “I mean, I know he’s a bit of a…a…” He made these awkward hand gestures as if it were some way to accurately describe Daehyun. I simply nodded although the only thing I got from that was that Daehyun was a flappy-eared eagle with jazz-hand horns. “Yeah.” He nodded. “But he’s not a bad guy, right? After all, he did help you hide form Himchan even though you rejected him. He at least deserves something.”

               “Maybe,” I admitted, eyebrows knit together into a frown. He might deserve something, but that something was not me. No, I was way too precious and had far too much pride to throw myself away like that. I wasn’t willing to sacrifice everything I’d worked up for (a.k.a winning Jaebum’s heart) to go on a date with Daehyun. There was too much on the line, and I was already a thirsty for a certain person. Stuck in the Sahara. Too far in. In too deep. You feel me?

               “But he’s had enough dates,” I continued. “He doesn’t need another one. I’m not willing to serve myself up to him on a plate, you know.” Luckily Junhong and his lame ice cream line jokes were nowhere to be found.

               “Well you are vanilla.”

               Apparently I did not need Junhong.

               “Ow! Okay, that was totally uncalled for.” Yongguk rubbed the area on his arm where I had slapped him, pouting a bit. “I mean seriously, he might be a total fool, but he isn’t a bad guy.” I sighed as Yongguk continued one of his long lectures. “You don’t know why he’s turned out the way he is. At least he isn’t a complete douchebag like Himchan or something – or worse, because it could be worse. He has a lot going on probably, and he’s just hiding it by doing all these things all the time. You can’t keep refusing a potential lover, Youngjae, no matter how disgusting he might seem to you. Because you know what? One day you’re going to…”

               I never got to hear the end of that lecture because while I went through the exit door at the bottom of the stairs, Yongguk, ever so passionate about his words hadn’t even realized that he ran into the wall beside the door. He endlessly ranted on and on that I simply quit holding the door out for him and just left.

               Though for some reason, as I hopped onto the bus taking me to the theater, a voice in my head (Yongguk) kept repeating a certain phrase over and over again.

               You can’t keep refusing a potential lover.

               No, oh god, I mentally scolded myself, pulling a face that caused the bus driver to stare at me weirdly. I couldn’t possibly think of Daehyun in that way. It was just gross.

               But for some reason I couldn’t help but feel a little bit guilty as the bus drove on by, my eyes tracing the apartment building’s windows and landing on a certain figure at a certain window, staring out aimlessly at the crowded streets below.

               I was stuck with cleaning duty today.

               Thanks to Yongguk’s lecture I was running quite late, a bit thrown off my game. And as punishment the manager made me take that bum Park whatever’s ty job. I glared at said bum currently manning my counter, lazily hanging by and stacking the chocolate bars in a messy way that made me want to choke a chicken.

               I begrudgingly swept at the floor around the arcade area, candy wrappings, broken toy pieces, lint, and popcorn kernels finding their way into the pan. Sweeping on carpet is a pain. There was this one little – a broken necklace chain or something – that refused to get into the pan. No matter how many times I swept over it, it would barely move and only stay in the same exact place. Frustrated, I was just about to bend over and pick up the filthy thing until two arms wrapped themselves around my waist and took the broomstick from my hands.

               I jumped at first, hairs on every single part of my body standing to attention at the sudden intruder. Though all at once they relaxed, the warmth of the other body making my cheeks flush just as soon as I realized who it was thanks to the voice speaking softly into my ear.

               “Here, let me help.”

               Cue internal spazzing and screaming. I felt a stupid smile tug at the corners of my lips, blush staining my cheeks as I fought the urge to bare that stupid smile. Jaebum, Jaebum, was holding me – ing stand-spooning me and boy was it good. I bit my lip to block the squeal that was threatening to come out. I had to remind myself that I was a fully grown twenty-year-old man, not a squealy, fangirly Japanese school girl.

               He was barely sweeping the damn necklace thing, but did I care? Nope. I hope that necklace never finds its way into the pan. If Jaebum was willing to help me clean up, I wouldn’t mind having to deal with clean up duty all the time. This change was nice. Very nice.

               Jaebum let out a breathy laugh when the chain didn’t budge. He flicked the dustpan upwards and somehow successfully tossed the chain into the air, catching it perfectly in the pan. As cool as that way, unfortunately, he did mistakenly release the dust and dirt I had collected from earlier. “Oops,” he mumbled embarrassedly, his breath tickling my ear.

               I laughed, sweeping up the escapee particles before turning my head to look up at Jaebum with a smile. “Thanks,” I said, smiling as brightly as I could. A part of me regretted doing so – what if I looked like a ing piranha? That would so not be cool. I wish I had Junhong’s smile or something, anything better than the growing on my face. Dammit.

               Jaebum grinned back, and it was only then did I realize how close we actually were. Our faces were literally three inches apart. My face suffered through another red attack as my thirsty self stared at his lips. I didn’t know what happened but the world started spinning and I could have sworn we were getting closer…

               “Ahem.”

               Jaebum immediately snapped away upon hearing the sound of someone clearing their throat, his crooked smile from earlier dropping into a scowl.

               So close…

               I didn’t even need to look to know who ruined our moment. I swear my luck is the worse these days. I need some pesticide…except dickticide. More specifically, Dickhyunticide.

               The groan that left my throat was inhuman – apparently being that thirsty for someone can have certain side effects. Desperation is one of my charms.

               “Jung.” A snarl.

               “Im.” A sneer.

               Venom. Venom and darts and arrows and bullets. Those do not even compare in strike to the way both males bled out each other’s names.

               Sit down for a moment, friend, for I have a little tale to tell you about. One about a charming, intelligent, and absolutely gorgeous prince named Im Jaebum, whose imperfections were tangible when facing the oh-so beautiful, self-proclaimed y mama jama with a bigass nose and weird accent, Jung Daehyun. Not that Im Jaebum possessed a lot of imperfections, that is. Shut up.

               Jung Daehyun was a peasant. A dirty, inadequate peasant. Not only is he dirty and inadequate, but he is also stupid. A stupefying stupid. He had a thing for messing with the prince, for making him turn into a five year old with his stupid insults and stupid face. Jung Daehyun was a peasant; a dirty, inadequate, stupid peasant that was meant to be crushed beneath the perfect feet of the prince.

                But Jung Daehyun did not believe in that.

               They met in an ice cream parlor, of course. They had seen each other prior to the meeting, but the fire that flamed between the two of them only fully ignited then. One would think their arguments would end there, but they did not. No, my dear. Like a forest fire it just spread, continued, burning down a path and marking its territory with a big, fat, ashy “STUPID.”

               Since then, their little battles occurred out in more public areas – never in private, therefore further embarrassing Yoo Youngjae…the thing in the middle. The shiny thing in the middle – the crown, yeah, that thing. Jung Daehyun was a dirty, inadequate, stupid peasant that thought the crown deserved to be worn by him. See why he’s so stupid now?

               From public park fountains to children’s playgrounds, the two fought over stupid things. Throwing woodchips, splashing water, kicking sand, slipping ice cubes down one another’s backs, sticking gum in hair, and threatening to hit each other with large sticks (thus nearly getting them both arrested, but that’s totally irrelevant) were only some of the things they did to destroy one another. Why in public all the time? Why does the crown have to witness such childish things? Why is the crown always caught in the middle? Why does the crown always have to end up explaining to angered moms and apologizing to horrified children about the prince and the peasant’s behavior?

               They’ve been shushed by the elderly, glared at by the adults, laughed at by the adolescent, and stared at by children. They’ve even out-screamed blubbering babies on buses.

               I was annoyed by the fact that Daehyun interrupted my moment with Jaebum and that the two would only start another stupid argument all over again. Except this time they were at the movies, where popcorn kernels, chairs, arcades, and soda could possibly be ed up in their battle. This was something I wasn’t not looking forward to, because guess who’d have to clean up their dumb mess?

               But let’s stray off topic for a second: Jaebum is still holding me like a possessive little squirrel and I love it. It’s a ing broom that we’re both holding, but our fingers are touching and something magical is bubbling up inside of me. Thank the lord for that broom. I might need to borrow Himchan’s for a little bit in the future.

               It’s so obvious that Jaebum is flirting with me. We belong together. We will ride off into the sunset on a pretty pink horse farting out roses and pansies while the wind blows through our hair.

               …Shut up. Stop crushing my dreams, tit.

               Back to where we were before. Daehyun was staring at us weir