“UNCLE JUNSU!” came the squeal of something short, pale, and very girly. Junsu had three seconds to prepare himself until his leg was attacked by the adorable little midget he called his niece. “I’ve missed you!” She held her arms out wide. “THIIIIIIIIS MUCH!”

Laughing, he ruffled her hair before picking her up and pecking her on the cheek. “I’ve missed you too, Sun Mi...” He glanced over the top of her head; her mother waved to him from the front of the white minivan as she drove off. “Looks like you’re stuck with me for the night, little one.”

“YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA...” (And the authors would like to save you the ongoing 3 hours that this lasted for and move on with the next scene)

“Uncle Susu~” Junsu heard his little niece as she entered the kitchen. “Whatcha doin?”

“Why, I am making some dessert, Sun Mi-yah.”

“Oooooo...” The girl let out the monosyllabic...sound that could resemble a monkey’s voice in a very interested manner. “What are you making?”

“One of my favorite things to eat of all time: pudding!”

Sun Mi threw her hands high above her head and wiggled her fingers. “SHAAAAAAAAAA~”

Junsu stopped mixing with the spoon and stared at her. “Did you learn that from your aunt?” he asked in a deadpanned voice.

She nodded vigorously. “And Auntie’s friend! They watch that video all the time!” She stood on her tiptoes, attempting futilely to see what lay atop the counter. “Uncle Su, what flavor is it?”

“Hmm...” He examined its dark contents. “The box said chocolate, but I could always add things to it and make it extra special and yummy.” He opened the cutlery drawer, withdrew a spoon, and briefly dipped it in the chocolatey mixture before holding it out to his niece. “Tell me how it is.”

“Nummy~” She happily the back of the spoon, humming softly to herself. After deciding that watching him stir and stir in circles was boring, she skipped off to the living room to indulge herself in some Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

Meanwhile, Junsu had finally become satisfied with the consistency of his mixture of ultimate sweetness; he turned off the gas of his stove and poured its contents into a large, translucent bowl, mixing in his vanilla extract as he did so. After that, he covered the top with plastic wrap, and placed the bowl in the refrigerator; then joining his niece to play some Super Smash Bros. Brawl.

“Is it ready, Uncle Susu?”

Junsu paused their current match in SSBB and placed down his Nintendo Gamecube controller. “Let me check real quick, alright?” Without waiting for a reply, he stood up and reentered the food heaven (a.k.a. the kitchen, though Junsu’s kitchen was lacking on the heavenly part because of the lack of food) and opened his fridge to check on the pudding he had placed in there roughly four hours ago. Taking a spoon as he did so, he unwrapped the plastic over it, dipped the spoon in, and tasted the heavenly deliciousness of the ultimate sweetness. He felt as if he had been momentarily indulged into a world of ecstasy...

“Uncle?”

“IT’S READY, SUN MI-YAH!” Junsu exclaimed a little too excitedly, but his niece had already familiarized herself with his random outbursts, and therefore, did not think it was awkward in any way as she made her way into the kitchen.

“Yaaay, pudding!”

“Actually...” the evil glint appeared in Junsu’s eyes, “It seems as though there’s only enough for me. Sorry.” And he pulled the bowl away from the young girl’s grasp.

“WAAAH, UNCLE SUSU~” As most little kids tend to do when they do not get their way...

...she flailed her arms about, effectively smacking him in the groin as she did so.

“MMMM!!!” Immediately, Junsu doubled over in pain, forgetting about the pudding altogether as he crumpled into a pile on the floor. “...ow...”

Sun Mi blinked furiously before dropping down beside him. “Yah. Uncle Su.” She poked him hard in the ribs. “What’s wrong?”

“...ow...”

“Ow?” She let out a tiny gasp. “Did I hurt my uncle?!”

“...yes...” he rasped out, coughing still.

“OMOOOOOOOO~” She took a step back. “But Uncle Su...” Her eyes widened innocently. “Normal people scream when they get hurt.”

He sent a small glare her way before scrambling back to his feet. “I’m okay. I’m okay. I AM OKAY.” He sighed and turned back to the chocolate pudding, but...it had disappeared. “YAH! SUN MI-YAH!” When he turned around, he saw her dart to the living room with his precious bowl of the god’s ambrosia. “GET BACK HERE!”

“NEVER~!” For such a tiny thing, she had quite a bit of courage and spunk. Must take after her mother. And she probably picks up bad habits from her aunt and her best friend.

Junsu held back a mean retort (she was only five, for crying out loud) and took off after her. He caught the little culprit red-handed by the stairs. She had already begun to take big spoonfuls from the bowl. “Yah, at least ask me for a bowl or something. I was kidding about it being mine...” Okay, not really, but she doesn’t need to know that, does she? Five years old, Junsu. Must remember that...

She held out the bowl to him. “You can has some,” she exclaimed cheerfully.

He narrowed his eyes before rushing back to the kitchen for a spoon. Once he returned, he dug out a spoonful the size of a baseball and chomped down on it. “Mmmm~”

“So yummy~” Sun Mi giggled, mouth completely smeared with chocolate.

“Here, let me get that.” He reached over to wipe , but she jerked away. “Yah!”

“You don’t even got a napkin!” she whined.

“Oh, fine.” He rushed back to the kitchen to fetch a few napkins before going back to wipe clean. She smiled as he cleaned her up, blissfully full of pudding. “Well...we should probably leave the rest of this for later, otherwise we’ll get a stomachache.”

She let out a giant yawn. “Okay...”

Junsu looked at his watch. “Aish, it’s almost eight! Your parents will kill me if I let you stay up too late...”

“B-b-but...” She rubbed at her eyes and yawned again. “I’m not s-s-sleepy...”

“...sleeptime, little one.” He scooped her up and carried her upstairs to the spare bedroom right next to his own. He pulled the fluffy down comforter up to her neck and tucked in the sides. She squirmed slightly in the bed, and he chuckled while she settled down. “Good night, Sun Mi,” he whispered, kissing her forehead. He made to turn away from the bed, but her small hand tugged him back. “Eh?”

“You can’t go yet,” she huffed at him. “You still haven’t told me a story!”

“...what?”

She sighed and patted the bed beside her. “Mama and Daddy always tell me stories before I go to sleep. You gotta tell me one, too.” She stared up at him as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, and he was a complete idiot for not knowing. “Okay?”

“...sure...”

“Make it a good one!” she yipped before settling back onto the pillows.

He scratched the back of his head. None of the stories that his parents had told him when he was little stood out in particular (minus the one about the chicken running around, yelling nonsense about the sky falling).

“But-”

However, Junsu immediately cut himself off as soon as he saw those evil puppy eyes that his young niece gave him, and thus, without any planning whatsoever, he gave into her silent plea.

So he began, “Once upon a time...”

A/N: To say that we have completely lost our minds would be wrong. I assure you that we have merely stowed our minds away for its own safety.

So, without further ado, I present to you "Pudding War" along with my Co-Author, Andi!

Andi: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOT. Fear this story. I SAID FEAR IT. This...is what happens...when you leave me and Karlo alone on a doc...actually it's what happens when you leave me alone with anybody who can be as random as me. Karlo surprised me with a lot of what he wrote. YOU ISH AWESOME BURRITO!!! >:]

Warning: This story contains minor foul language (which may be unsuitable for kids), some rather childish and unusual inside jokes and humour (which may or may not be unsuitable for adults), and complete and utter randomness (which is probably not suitable for anyone at all, but hey, this exists).

I will also commend anyone that can read through the whole thing without going insane. Good luck~

-Karlo