The only reason Sunwoo agrees to be tutored is because the other option involves getting kicked off the basketball team (and repeating the grade probably, but that part barely registers).  He has no idea why Dongwoo agreed to tutor him.

Sunwoo knows he’s not a good student (it’s impossible to not know that) and he hasn’t exactly been friendly or even polite to Dongwoo.  Shin Dongwoo is a year above him and consistently ranks within the top five of his grade, he wears glasses with thick rims, and looks like just the kind of guy that Sunwoo expects to look down on him.  Sunwoo talks to him without honourifics, his words are blunt and deliberately rude.  

“Don’t talk to me when you see me in the halls, or in the dining hall, or you know.  Anywhere outside of here,” he punctuates with a sharp jab of his finger.  He wants to get this out of the way before anything else.  

Dongwoo just smiles and shrugs, “Okay.”

Dongwoo doesn’t show any outward sign of annoyance.  There’s no eye rolling, frowning or even a slight furrow of the brows.  He just pulls out his notebooks and sits down in one of the chairs.

Sunwoo doesn’t get it, but it doesn’t matter as long as Dongwoo sticks to his word.




“I told you not to talk to me outside of this room.”  Those are the first word Sunwoo says their next session.

Dongwoo does frown then, looking up at Sunwoo from his seat with a confused expression.  “When did I do that?”

“You waved at me.”

Book smarts clearly don’t translate well into common sense.  Understanding dawns on Dongwoo’s face, slowly.  “Ah, so I should act as if I don’t know you at all,” he nods and, again, smiles.  Sunwoo has to wonder if he’s laughing at him.

“Yes, wasn’t that obvious?”

“You should speak more clearly, but I get it.  Now sit down so we can get started.”




Sunwoo tenses when he notices Dongwoo walk into the gymnasium during practice.  He thinks, for a moment, maybe this is Dongwoo’s way of getting back at him for being a general towards him.  But then the older boy doesn’t so much as glance over, just walks over to the coach, bowing and smiling.  Sunwoo watches him out of the corner of his eye while Dongwoo only looks at the coach, speaking to him for a few minutes before leaving.  

What surprises him is that he’s not the only one that notices Dongwoo come and go.  After he leaves several of the others on the team murmur noisily amoung themselves.  

“What was that about?”

“What’s he doing here?”

In spite of himself Sunwoo is curious.  “What’s the big deal about that guy?”

It is, apparently, a hot topic.

Sunwoo brings up the topic in the change room, listening curiously as people chime in one after another.  The third years are the loudest, since they were the ones that were on the team when Dongwoo was.  He was good, really good apparently, more than a few comment that if he were still on the team he’d probably be captain.  

Sunwoo has a hard time imagining it.  He doesn’t know Dongwoo well but he can’t imagine that well-mannered, eerily patient guy in a competitive sport.  He imagines Dongwoo bowing and handing the ball carefully to the opposing team with both hands, he has to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing.

“Why’d he stop, if he was so good?”

“Injury,” someone answers flatly.  Sunwoo’s surprised to see that it’s a first year that answers, a tall, skinny kid.  He looks uncomfortable when one of the third years speaks up again, frowning deeply and turning away.  “He tried to play again after that,” there are a few scattered chuckles.

“Man, it was sad.”  It doesn’t stop there, but by that point Sunwoo is only half paying attention.  He doesn’t really care, it had just been passing curiosity and at this point they’re not talking about anything interesting anymore.  (Or maybe, just a little, he’s not really comfortable with everyone in the change room trash talking one guy, even if Sunwoo has had similar thoughts himself.)

 


“Hey, you’re not focusing.”

Sunwoo shoves Dongwoo’s notes away with a grunt and a roll of his eyes.  It’s raining outside and he’s had a pounding headache since before practice.  The exertion had only made it worse but there’s no way he’s going to complain about it, especially not to Dongwoo.

“Stop messing around.  You know what’s at risk.”

Dongwoo’s only one year older than him but right now he’s making Sunwoo feel like a kid.  It pisses him off.  

He should probably be more thankful.  Dongwoo has been no less than perfectly accommodating, staying late after his classes are long finished in order to meet Sunwoo for their tutoring sessions.  He’s a good teacher, carefully explains each point even when Sunwoo refuses to acknowledge that he’s confused.  He’s patient, even when Sunwoo is deliberately difficult.  And in spite of all the attitude Sunwoo’s given him, Dongwoo has never once talked down to him.

It’s annoying though.  He hates how perfect Dongwoo seems, it makes him feel like a small person, like he’s an act of charity (after all, what could Dongwoo possibly gain from putting up with him like this).

He doesn’t need charity from anyone, least of all from some guy who only studies because he can’t play anymore.

“I’m messing around?  Maybe the problem is that you’re not very good at this, it’s like you’re talking just to hear your own voice.”  Sunwoo watches the way Dongwoo’s lips thin and his eyes narrow, he wonders if he’s finally exhausted Dongwoo’s seemingly endless patience.    

For a long moment Dongwoo says nothing.

“Maybe I’m not good at this, but I’m all that you’re going to get.  If I don’t tutor you, no one else will.  So you can either stop dicking around and make the most of this, or you can try to raise your marks by yourself, fail, and get kicked off the team.  Either way, stop wasting my time.”

His voice is so even and unaffected, as if he’s just stating obvious facts.  Sunwoo can feel a burn rising from his neck to his face, he’s angry and he’s embarrassed.  (Because he’s aware of how right Dongwoo is.)

“You think I’m an idiot, don’t you?  Are you having fun looking down on me?  If it’s such a waste of time then why the hell are you doing this anyways?”

It’s something he’s wondered since day one.  

“Because,” Dongwoo says, Sunwoo half thinks he’ll just stop there.  His lips are pressed together tightly and his eyebrow twitches slightly but eventually he continues.  “You’ll get kicked off the team,” Dongwoo drops his gaze to the notebook in front of him and bites his bottom lip.  Sunwoo’s thankful, he feels too ashamed to look Dongwoo in the eye.

He wordlessly pulls the abandoned notebook back closer and rubs at his temples.  It’s hard to focus on the words but Sunwoo tries at least.

The rain is noisy and distracting, as is the clock.  He’s not sure how many minutes pass and he’s still on the same page, it feels like the ticking of the clock is chipping away at his sanity.  

Dongwoo sighs and Sunwoo finally looks up to see him sliding a packet of painkillers and his water bottle across the table.  

“…you just carry that around in your bag?”

“I get headaches sometimes, from the change in air pressure.”

Sunwoo can’t quite bring himself to say thank you.  Again, he feels like a kid with how Dongwoo manages to work things out without Sunwoo saying anything.  He feels like he’s being taken care of – but he bites back anything impulsively cruel and untrue before he can form words.  He takes the bottle and the pills while staring at his hands.

“You could have just said something, you know.  Do you want to meet tomorrow instead?  Your test is on Monday so I don’t want to miss a session.”

Sunwoo thinks he’s going red, but not in anger or humiliation this time.

“I’m fine.”




He manages a C for the test, it’s nothing outstanding but it’s a distinct improvement.  Sunwoo feels kind of stupid that he feels proud of it, so he stuffs the results in his bag and forgets about it until Dongwoo texts him.

how did you do?

He’s tempted to ignore the message and he does for most of the day, but it’s in the back of his mind.  It’s not until he’s in the change room getting ready for practice that it starts to bother him.

Because, that word had felt so heavy for some reason.  You’ll get kicked off the team, Sunwoo wants to tell himself that he’s reading too much into it.  That’s the reason he’s getting tutored, Dongwoo had just been reminding him of it.  But he doesn’t think he imagined the tightness in Dongwoo’s voice, as if trying to pull something back, trying not to say too much.  There was more he could have said, maybe wanted to say.

Because it was a stupid reason to get kicked off the team when he was able to play, unlike Dongwoo who couldn’t anymore.

He hurriedly texts Dongwoo back, barely making it to practice on time, and when he checks his phone after practice a message is waiting for him.

congratulations!  you did well ^^




Their next session, Wednesday, Dongwoo s a can of grape soda at Sunwoo and ruffles his hair.  He accepts the soda but bats at the hand in his hair away and gives Dongwoo a weird look.  

(But, strangely, he appreciates the gesture.  It’s the first time in a long time that he’s been praised for something other than his athletics, even if the actual grade is nothing to brag about.)

“If you do better your next test I’ll treat you to tteokbokki.”

Sunwoo rolls his eyes but he’s a teenager, he’s not going to turn down the prospect of free food.




He doesn’t raise his grade for his next test, but Dongwoo takes him out anyways, telling him that he’s already improved.  Sunwoo thinks it’s weird but, again, he’s a teenager and free food is free food.  

He glances around the street stall they’re hovering around, keeping an eye open for anyone else he might know.  He’s not too keen on his friends or team mates finding out that he’s being tutored by Dongwoo. (It makes him feel stupid.)  And this is even weirder because it’s not tutoring, this is just them hanging out.  There’s no reason for a guy like him to hang out with a guy like Dongwoo.  

He remembers the they said about Dongwoo, maybe he didn’t like what they said, maybe he didn’t agree with what they said – but what if they transfer what they think of Dongwoo onto him?  He doesn’t care enough to say anything when the gossiping starts and he doesn’t care enough to risk his reputation.  (It makes him feel uncomfortable, but he’s not sure that the discomfort is because he doesn’t want to be seen with Dongwoo.)

Sunwoo makes a face and shifts restlessly.

Dongwoo ruffles his hair and grins wryly, “You won’t run into anyone here, it’s too out of the way.”

(Something in Sunwoo prickles at that comment, he’s not sure what.  Why does Dongwoo always have to notice the things that Sunwoo doesn’t want him to?)

“As if I care,” he brushes Dongwoo’s hand away.

“Oh?  So then it’s fine if I talk to you when we’re at school?”

“Don’t,” Sunwoo blurts out, a little bit too urgently.  (Again, it prickles and he’s not sure why.)

Dongwoo laughs, and hands him his plate of tteokbokki.  “I won’t.”

(Sunwoo tries to listen deeper, but unlike Dongwoo he’s not good at listening beyond the words that are there, so he has no idea what Dongwoo is thinking.  Is he annoyed with Sunwoo?  Is he hurt by Sunwoo’s insistence that they act as if they don’t know each other?  Or maybe he doesn’t want to be seen with the idiot kid on the basketball team, the same way Sunwoo doesn’t want to be associated with nerd with the annoyingly wide smile.  

He has no idea.)

Dongwoo slings his arm around Sunwoo’s shoulder and gives him a shake.  “Hey, come on, eat up!  Isn’t food that you don’t have to pay for the best tasting?”

“It’s good,” Sunwoo mutters around a mouthful of tteok (and he doesn’t shake Dongwoo’s arm off).




“Hey, we’re going to the arcade, are you coming?”  Sunwoo’s just changing back into his school uniform, his group of semi-friends (they’re more friends because they’re on the same team than for any other reason) are crowded together, ready to bolt.  Free time is precious, and no one wants to waste even a second of it.

“No, I’m good,” Sunwoo answers as he packs with a similar sense of urgency.  He expects them to shrug and head off without him but when he looks up from buttoning his shirt he’s being stared down.

“What’s up with you lately, we barely see you outside of school.”

He’s meeting Dongwoo today for his thrice weekly tutoring session, that’s what, but he can’t exactly say that.  (It occurs to Sunwoo that a few weeks ago he wouldn’t have thought too much of ditching Dongwoo just to keep up appearances with his group.  But whether it’s due to a newly sprouted sense of responsibility or something else all together – the thought of ditching Dongwoo is unappealing.)

He shrugs, “I have plans.”

“Ooooh?”

Sunwoo blinks at them, not too sure what the oohing is about.  He’s staring about five eating grins and he has no idea why.

“You’ve got a girl, haven’t you?”

Sunwoo snorts, he can’t help it but at least he manages to not outright laugh.  He shakes his head and grins (which probably doesn’t help his case).  “I really don’t.”

Predictably they don’t believe him but if they want to think Sunwoo has a girlfriend that doesn’t hurt him.  So he just pushes his way past them and hurries off to meet Dongwoo.  It’s not like he’s all that eager to study but Dongwoo never leaves until he’s convinced they’ve covered everything they need to cover, so the sooner they start the sooner they finish.  (And maybe, just maybe, Dongwoo kind of makes the whole studying thing more tolerable.)




“They let you keep your hair long,” Sunwoo comments, seemingly out of nowhere, in the middle of their tutoring session.

Dongwoo looks like the model student, his uniform is always neat, shirt tucked and buttoned all the way to the top, and the glasses help with that impression.  But he wears his hair long, heavy fringe falling into his eyes when he bows his head to read a book, it’s out of place. (It looks right on him though, good.)

Sunwoo wears his hair dark and short, because he’d been forced to dye it black early on in the school year. (Also with threats, because that seems to be the only way adults know how to make Sunwoo do anything and the basketball team is the perfect hostage.)

Dongwoo fingers the tips of his hair (it’s long enough to just graze his shoulders) with a dull, clueless look. He’s always like that; it takes Dongwoo a moment to consider what is being said and what he wants to say in response.  It’s the opposite of how Sunwoo responds.  At first it had been incredibly annoying to deal with, but now he just waits.

“No one’s ever said anything to me about it,” Dongwoo says after a moment.  Sunwoo wants to say, that’s the point, but he figures Dongwoo will get it after another second.  

He does, and a bit more.

“Ah, that’s right,” Dongwoo continues, as if suddenly remembering something. “Your hair was blonde before, wasn’t it?”

It was and Sunwoo thinks maybe he should whine about the double standards, just because Dongwoo gets good grades and stays out of trouble, he gets to walk around looking like a playboy.  (Except not really, maybe he would if his smile wasn’t ridiculously wide and warm, too genuine to play anyone.) But Sunwoo is more focused on the fact that Dongwoo had noticed him before he started tutoring him. It makes him feel weirdly pleased, so he can’t be bothered to whine.

Dongwoo reaches across the table and ruffles Sunwoo’s hair, he doesn’t bother to bat the hand away anymore. “It looks good like this too!”




At some point Sunwoo admits to himself that Dongwoo isn’t so bad.  (He’s probably known this for some time, maybe the whole time, but admitting it is different.)  Actually, if Sunwoo is completely honest, he’d say that he rather likes Dongwoo.  

Being around Dongwoo is easy, soothing even.  It seems like he never judges Sunwoo for anything, he assumes as little as possible and instead just watches and listens so that he can try to actually understand Sunwoo.  It’s new to Sunwoo.  Dongwoo is the only one that doesn’t simply cast him into a role.  Teachers expect him to be an annoying troublemaker, his friends and team mates expect him to be competitive and kind of harmlessly jerkish, people look at him and they immediately expect the same sort of thing.  

It’s not that they’re wrong, but that’s not all Sunwoo is.  Dongwoo is the only one that Sunwoo has ever known that so easily and naturally allows him to just be.  Sunwoo sees everything as a competition, he speaks without thinking a lot of the times, and sometimes he whines until even Dongwoo has to sigh in exasperation.  But there’s more than that.

“I want carp bread,” Sunwoo drops his head on Dongwoo’s shoulder (he’s not sure when these gestures became so easy).  Dongwoo tutors Sunwoo three times a week and, sometimes, after that Dongwoo feeds Sunwoo, because Sunwoo is eternally hungry (and he doesn’t quite want to go home yet, because he’d like to talk to Dongwoo about things that aren’t chemistry or history or anything else school related).

“So I should buy it for you again?”  Dongwoo asks with a laugh, but he doesn’t say no and Sunwoo latches on to that.

“Hyuung,” Sunwoo whines, pushing his lips into a pout.  He only does this in front of Dongwoo, because he’s the only one that Sunwoo is sure would never hold it against him and his image.  

Dongwoo rolls his eyes but grins, “All right, since you called me hyung.”

He cheers as Dongwoo slings his arm around Sunwoo’s shoulders.  (To be honest Sunwoo enjoys that as much as he enjoys the free food.)  “I want three,” he says eagerly and ignores the way his heart stutters when Dongwoo’s arm slips from his shoulder.  

“Two,” Dongwoo returns with a smile, looking back, hand on the door handle.

He walks out first and Sunwoo counts to twenty before he follows, there’s half a soccer field of space between them as they leave the school.  It's become their habit, Sunwoo doesn't know how it became their habit but it has and he hates it (himself) a little.  Dongwoo doesn’t look back while Sunwoo stares straight ahead, eyes almost burning holes into Dongwoo’s back.  He runs to catch up with Dongwoo when the school is several blocks behind them.

“Three!”  Sunwoo wants to link their arms or tackle Dongwoo or something, but he doesn’t dare to.  (It feels cheap when he’s the one that hangs back every time, the first time and every time after that.)

Dongwoo just smiles and pinches Sunwoo’s cheek, “I’ll get you five if you make a B on your next test.”

(Dongwoo just accepts it as he does all the other that comes with Sunwoo.  His attitude, his impatience, his whining, Dongwoo accepts it and never looks down on him for any of it.  Sunwoo quietly judges himself, hates that he's ashamed of Dongwoo, who is probably the kindest person he knows.

It makes Sunwoo realise that he’s a coward, but he doesn’t know how to change it.)