Leeteuk met Kangin in the most ordinary of ways: they rode the same subway home from work every night. Kangin sang at a bar in the center of Seoul while Leeteuk was a waiter in a twenty-four hour diner right down the street. Every night, around 2 a.m., they would get on the subway to go home. Leeteuk would read a book or a magazine, trying to forget the angry customers he had just dealt with; Kangin would put his iPod in and listen to some soft music, trying to forget the loud roar of the bar while he looked out the window at the black subway tunnel.

It was like this every night; two people, doing their own things, living their own lives. Leeteuk never saw Kangin and Kangin never saw Leeteuk. Oftentimes people get so caught up in their own lives that they are completely oblivious to what is sitting right in front of them until something out of the ordinary happens.

“What the hell?” Kangin cursed as the subway jolted to a stop in the dark tunnel.

“There are probably just issues with the power supply; it was storming pretty badly when I got on.” Leeteuk commented without looking up from his book.

“I’m not stupid, you know! I just want to get home.” Kangin whined and Leeteuk looked up finally and gave the man a small smile.

“Long night at work?” Leeteuk asked.

“You have no idea.” Kangin answered and Leeteuk just nodded as a response before going back to his book.

Five minutes later when the subway started to move again Kangin let out an obvious sigh of relief and Leeteuk let out a low chuckle that nobody else heard.

It was simple, but it was enough. Sometimes there doesn’t have to be fireworks when two people meet to begin a relationship. Sometimes all it takes is a stuck subway and a few words exchanged to take two people from being strangers to being acquaintances.

Leeteuk still read and Kangin still listened to his iPod, but day by day (or in this case night by night) things started shifting. Sometimes Kangin would comment about another passenger, saying something about their hair or clothes and Leeteuk would nod in response, sometimes laughing if it was funny, before he replied with his own observations.

One night, about a week after the subway had gotten stuck, Kangin got on the subway and immediately sat down next to Leeteuk who closed his book and looked up in surprise. Kangin had spoken to him, but they had never sat next to each other before. Leeteuk gave him a worried look and Kangin let out a groan.

“Bad day?” Leeteuk asked and Kangin nodded.

“People can be so stupid!” He said rather loudly, earning them both weird looks from the other passengers.

“I don’t know whether to be insulted or not, but yes they can be.” Leeteuk said and Kangin’s eyes immediately got wide in horror as he realized the implications of what he had said.

“I didn’t mean that you were stupid, I just meant that as a whole people tend to be really dumb! I’ll even admit that I myself can be rather dumb at times! I don’t mean that I am stupid it’s just that…I should really just stop talking now, shouldn’t I?” Kangin gave in after trying to escape from the corner he had already backed himself into. Leeteuk just nodded and laughed.

“I get what you mean, really I do. I’m not insulted. On a more positive note, you just made my awful night so much better.” Leeteuk said and Kangin smiled so wide it made his eyes get all crinkly at the side.

“Really?” He asked and Leeteuk nodded furiously.

“I never knew that a man whose name I don’t even know could make me feel that much better.” Leeteuk said and Kangin immediately stuck out his hand.

“I’m Kim Youngwoon, but you can call me Kangin. Now I’m not just the nameless man on the subway who made you feel better.” Kangin said with a dorky grin and Leeteuk shook his hand.

“No, no you are not. I’m Park Jungsu, but you can call me Leeteuk.” Leeteuk answered with an equally sheepish grin.

“Would you like to get a drink with me?” Leeteuk asked as the two stepped off the subway together.

“I’ve had enough dealing with drunk people for one night; how about coffee?” Kangin offered instead.

“Caffeine at 2:30 in the morning; how about we get milkshakes instead?” Leeteuk asked and Kangin nodded in agreement.

As they sat drinking chocolate milkshakes and sharing useless small talk the step from acquaintances to friends was taken.

Whether either one of them wanted to admit it or not, the late night rendezvous’ on the subway started to mean more than just having somebody to talk to on the ride home. Love can be sneaky and occasionally one’s own feelings evade them until a time when they are ready to admit them to themselves. When the words came out of Kangin’s mouth asking Leeteuk to have dinner with him it was his heart’s way of trying to tell his brain to wake up. When Leeteuk said yes; it did.

They sat awkwardly in the restaurant, pushing food around on their plate, not knowing what to say.

“So, where do you work?” Kangin asked.

Somehow, amongst their late night conversations, such a small detail seemed to get lost.

“I’m a waiter at a diner. I work the night shift which is why I am always on the subway so late.” Leeteuk answered. “What do you do?”

“I’m a singer in a bar.” Kangin offered.

“Really, that’s so cool! I always thought about singing, but I’m afraid I’m not very good.” Leeteuk offered up and Kangin took it, desperate not to fall back into the thick silence that had previously surrounded them.

“I’m sure you would be a fine singer, you have a very melodic voice as it is. Maybe you could come listen to me sing sometime?” Kangin asked with an embarrassing blush covering his cheeks

“I’d really like that.” Leeteuk said and Kangin smiled. Leeteuk thought he had a nice smile.

The rest of dinner wasn’t as awkward as they finished eating and talked about work and friends. Kangin told Leeteuk stories about the encounters he had with drunken customers and Leeteuk told him stories about angry people and the stupid things they did.

The next night when Kangin went to work, Leeteuk went with him. He was ignoring his own shift, but playing hooky every now and again was good for the soul.

Kangin left him at the bar while he went to the employee room to prepare. Leeteuk sipped his drink slowly and looked around him, watching the people and trying to figure out what was going on in their lives just to pass the time. He was particularly intrigued by a man and a woman who seemed to be arguing in their tipsy stupor when Kangin came on stage.

“This song is for someone special here tonight.” Was all he said before the music began to play. Leeteuk could have sworn he saw him wink at him though.

The song was slower and the rest of the bar was obviously not enjoying it as much as Leeteuk was. It was a sweet song, and the fact that Kangin was singing it for him made it even better. Kangin’s voice was surprisingly gentle; Leeteuk would have thought it would have been a little rougher but his tone was perfect. As the song ended Leeteuk found himself clapping harder than anyone else in the room.

Kangin stepped down off the stage and went straight over to Leeteuk who smiled brightly at him.

“You were wonderful.” Leeteuk commented and Kangin smiled and took him into an awkward hug.

“I’m glad you liked it.” Kangin said as the bartender put down a glass of water next to him. Kangin gladly took it.

“I have to go back on, but I really hope you’ll stay.” Kangin whispered in Leeteuk’s ear before he began to make his way back to the stage.

“Of course.” Leeteuk mouthed and Kangin nodded his head in acknowledgment before getting back on stage. As Leeteuk watched Kangin perform for the rest of the night, catching smiles and waves directed at him every now and then, he began to realize something: he liked Kangin.

At the end of the night they ended up back on the subway again. Leeteuk, who had a headache from the loud environment of the busy bar, laid his head against Kangin’s shoulder.

“I now see why you always have a headache at the end of the night.” Leeteuk stated and Kangin nodded before placing an arm around Leeteuk’s shoulders.

“You get used to it.”

They rode in silence like they usually did, not wanting to disturb the other. As the subway began to slow before their stop Kangin was the first to speak.

“Leeteuk, I think I kind of like you.”

Leeteuk simply smiled warmly at him before he replied.

“Kangin, I think I kind of like you too.”

And they did like each other. Some would call it love; others would call it a deep infatuation. Others wouldn’t believe it was any kind of affection other than lust. Kangin and Leeteuk didn’t care what they called it. Words are, after all, nothing but sounds strung together to convey a thought. They liked spending time with each other, liked the conversation and liked the silence. Kangin liked Leeteuk’s unique laugh and Leeteuk liked the sound of Kangin singing to him softly in the morning. He thought it was cheesy when the latter would sing him romantic ballads or bring him flowers, but he loved it none the less. Love is as much cheesy affections as it is dealing with the others morning breath. It is funny like that. On one hand there are the touching moments whereas, on the other hand, one has to deal with the disgustingness that is life sometimes. You put up with the vomiting after the night of drinking to see the person you love make a fool out of themselves in a public place. In the end you do it because you care; because you love that person and don’t know how you would make it through life without them.

Life can be cruel though, and sometimes it wedges itself between two people and desperately tries to pry them apart. Sometimes it fails to do so, other times it succeeds. Leeteuk didn’t realize that life was going to succeed when he said goodbye to Kangin early on a spring Saturday morning.

Kangin was leaving to go home and see his family. He had left them when he had come to Seoul to try and be a singer and missed them terribly. Leeteuk knew that he had to let him go, but it was still difficult to say goodbye to someone he had grown so used to waking up next to every morning, even if he was going to be back by Monday morning.

“I will be there when you wake up, promise.”  Kangin said as he placed a chaste kiss on Leeteuk’s lips, ignoring the arrogant looks he got from passers-by.

“I know; I love you.” Leeteuk answered as he wrapped his arms around Kangin’s waist, hugging him tight.

“I love you too.” Kangin said and then got into his cab.

Leeteuk didn’t bother to watch as he left; instead he headed back inside and went back to bed. It was only 7:00 a.m. and he did get home at three last night.

He woke up at noon, made the bed and got himself some food. When he was done eating he started finding miscellaneous things that needed to be done around the apartment: washing dishes, cleaning the bathroom. He continued with this until he had to leave for work. On Sunday he did the same thing. It’s funny how people can function so well without a person, then they come into their lives and when they are gone again they don’t know what to do with themselves.

On Monday morning, Kangin was there when Leeteuk woke up, just as he had promised. He was there; but he wasn’t there.

When Leeteuk opened his eyes, he kissed his lips; but it wasn’t like it was before he left. When Leeteuk went out into the kitchen, Kangin had already made breakfast; something that he never did before.

‘It’s because he just got home.’ Leeteuk thought as an explanation.

They spent the afternoon watching a movie that Leeteuk knew Kangin would find hilarious, but the latter didn’t laugh at all. Every time Leeteuk would try to snuggle up next to Kangin the later would move away until finally, Leeteuk gave up and sat on the other side of the couch.

Leeteuk left for work before Kangin did as per usual, but Kangin didn’t kiss him goodbye; all he got was a half-hearted wave.

When they got on the subway, Kangin sat across from Leeteuk and put his iPod in; a habit long forgotten after he met Leeteuk. Leeteuk wasn’t prepared for this so he just sat and looked out the dark window at the tunnel passing by.

‘What did I do?’ He thought helplessly.

Kangin’s distant actions continued through Wednesday, until finally Leeteuk had enough.

“Kangin, what did I do? Why are you ignoring me?” Leeteuk asked as they worked around each other to make breakfast.

“You didn’t do anything, I’m not ignoring you.” Kangin retorted, bitterness apparent in his voice.

“Yes you are, just please tell me what’s wrong?” Leeteuk pleaded and he heard Kangin let out a huge sigh, a warning sign that meant Kangin was about to explode.

“What’s wrong? THIS is wrong! We are two guys living with each other, SLEEPING with each other! It’s not right. It isn’t supposed to be this way. I was supposed to come to Seoul, become a successful singer and find a pretty girl to marry.” Kangin spoke with a tight voice, trying to keep control of his emotions. When he turned he saw Leeteuk’s broken face, pain written all across it.

“So that is it? You are mad at me for not being a girl?” Leeteuk squeaked. Unlike Kangin, Leeteuk was unashamedly showing his emotions, wanting Kangin to know that what he was saying was hurting him.

Kangin took a deep breath. He didn’t want to do this, but he had to.

“It’s not that I am mad at you for not being a girl, I am mad at myself for falling for you. This isn’t the life I want for myself.” Kangin explained; trying to make it sound like it was his fault.

“Well then why don’t you leave me and go make the life you always wanted happen!” Leeteuk cried, tears starting to fall. He knew that he was being a drama queen but to hell with it. This was Kangin he was talking to, and it was his heart that he was breaking; he would be a drama queen if he ing wanted to!

Kangin looked at him solemnly and pushed his way past him and into the bedroom without another word. He grabbed a suitcase from under the bed and began to throw clothes into it haphazardly. He didn’t know how much longer he could stay there without completely falling apart. He closed the suitcase when he had enough clothes for a couple of days and grabbed his keys and headed towards the door.

“What are you doing?” Leeteuk asked as Kangin opened the door and took the step out. Kangin turned around and gave the crying Leeteuk a pitiful glance. He tried to memorize his features, although this wasn’t how he wanted to remember him.

“I’m sorry.”

With that Kangin closed the door and headed down the stairs of their apartment building as the tears began to fall. He pounded his way down the side walk and towards the bus station, his mother’s voice resounding just as clear in his head as when she had spoken to him days prior.

‘Kangin, son. You know I love you put I can’t accept your love with Leeteuk. I am giving you a choice. You may stay with him, but then I will never speak to you ever again and will make sure that nobody in the family every contacts you; or you may leave him and we will welcome you home with open arms.’

Leeteuk watched as Kangin shut the door on him, leaving him alone in their apartment. He wasn’t thinking anymore, the only thing that registered in his brain was the pain that seemed to originate in his chest but had spread to his entire body, making him weak. Somehow his legs managed to carry him to the bedroom where he collapsed on the bed and cried; clutching a pillow that still smelled like Kangin instead of the man himself.

The next day Kangin was on a bus back home where he was met by his family. His mother opened her arms to him and he met her with a smile on his face while inside his heart was shattered.

Leeteuk woke up early and went about his routine like a zombie. At work he got orders wrong, spilled drinks on customers and eventually pissed off his manager so much that he got sent home early. He didn’t want to be home (it reminded him of Kangin) so he settled for walking instead of the subway so that it would take him much longer as well as distract him. As he was walking he saw a bunch of college kids at a pizza place and remembered that there was a school not far from where he was. The last thing he wanted to deal with was obnoxious kids so he crossed the street and decided to cut through the park to get home. He was in a deserted area when he heard soft sobs.

“Hello?” Leeteuk called out and walked towards where he thought the noise was coming from.

He saw a boy sitting there who looked like he could be a junior or senior in college, only a few years younger than himself. Tentatively, Leeteuk sat down on the bench next to him.

“What’s wrong?” Leeteuk asked as he cautiously put a hand on the boy’s shoulder.

“My boyfriend, he left to go home and I miss him. He just left me.” The boy choked out between sobs and Leeteuk just pulled him closer in a tight hug. As he remembered Kangin a few tears started to form but they never fell, he had cried himself out the night before.

When the boy had calmed down enough and pulled out of Leeteuk’s embrace Leeteuk spoke again.

“Love , doesn’t it?” Leeteuk asked and the boy nodded.

“It sure does. Thanks, by the way.”

“No problem, I’m Leeteuk.”

“Ryewook.”

Often times comfort can be found in a complete stranger just like love can be found in the man sitting across from you on the subway every night. Human relationships cycle through; sometimes developing and deepening and sometimes crumbling apart to make room for new relationships. That night as Ryewook found comfort in Leeteuk and Leeteuk found comfort in Ryewook a friendship was formed, connected by their own misery in that clichéd thing called love.