My breaths were short and raspy as I paced the length of the dorm back and forth in anticipation. My palms were clammy and I began to shift my weight uncomfortably with every step I took. I came around the mirror for about the hundredth time only to stop, check my hair, check my face, check my outfit, and then resume pacing.

“Are you going to calm down?” Key questioned annoyed, almost sliding off his bed to stop me. “You are going to sweat through your blazer already. Just sit down..... Onew...... JINKI!”

I stopped, turning on my heel to fact an infuriated roommate nervously. I sat reluctantly at my recently organized desk (and by recently organized, I mean two hours ago when Key found out Jonghyun was coming here and forced me to help him clean the dorm). We had power cleaned to our favorite playlist to avoid the embarrassment I would supposedly face with the previous condition of the room when Jonghyun comes over.

“Better?” I asked, rubbing my eyes.

“No, stop. We took enough time getting you to stop blushing. I don’t need you to look like you are crying now, too,” he sighed, grabbing my hands from my face. I felt my cheeks burn slightly, remembering how I couldn’t stop blushing when I was talking about what Jonghyun might have in store for the night.

I pulled my hands away and readjusted the hem of my sleeves over my wrists when a gentle ‘knock, knock’ sounded from the door. My eyes felt like they were going to pop from my head, and, without thinking, I jumped inside the closet and shut my eyes really tight. I was overwhelmed with nerves, I didn’t know what to do. I just need a minute, I thought. Why was I so nervous? This wasn’t natural, right? I’m sure this is a whole misunderstanding... this date... he’s so.... perf-

My thoughts silenced by the closet door swinging open slightly with a squeak. I opened one eye and saw a bouquet of roses and a crooked smile not too far behind. I groaned softly, slightly embarrassed for my overreaction. I stepped out of the wardrobe, taking the bouquet, sniffing the roses. I shot Key a side glare from behind the flowers only to see him smile and wave tauntingly before he left the room. It was just Jonghyun and I now.

“Sorry,” I began, awkwardly shuffling around him to set the bouquet down on my desk. “These are quite lovely, thank you. I’ll get a vase later for them and put them over her- ”

“You are so adorable when you are nervous,” Jonghyun cut off, wrapping his arms around my waist from behind. I placed my hands over his and felt something I had never felt before - an electric pulse. Chemistry?

I spun around in his arms and truly examined him for the first time that night. His pale hair was tousled carelessly, matching his free spirit. His jacket was very eccentric, but he didn’t wear it properly. It was just laid across his shoulders, his arms free of the sleeves. I smiled a bit, noting how funny it seemed he would wear his jacket like that. I had never seen anyone dress this way before. It suited him, though. I wiggled out of arms and walked around the small dorm.

“So this is my dorm. Exciting, isn’t it?” I chuckled, taking a few steps in a small circle, looking around again.

“I like it. I miss living in my dorm. Your roommate seems nice.” He smiled slyly for a moment.

“Key,” I growled. “He means well, but he’s very...”

“Stubborn?” Jonghyun finished.

“Yes, exactly! He wouldn’t let me just see you in my old clothes tonight. Not like I dress like a homele- wait. . I’ve said too much. He said not to tell you we got these clothes for just today.”

I pouted, scared I had said something wrong. The list Key told me of the things not to do ran through my head. I looked at Jonghyun and was relieved to see he was laughing, despite me spilling information that might’ve been better kept secret.

“Let’s go, sweetie,” Jonghyun laughed, lacing our fingers, leading me out of the room.

He pulled me passed all my classmates who eyed the strange man in our dorm curiously. I waved them off, smiling as Jonghyun towed me down to his car. Even in the vehicle he was getting stares and comments passed about him.

“Don’t you mind,” I asked pointing to a group of girls hovering slowly towards the car.

“No.” he shrugged, backing out. “I painted a painting once that became well known, so I’m used to it. Is that arrogant?”

“No, that’s.... wonderful,” I whispered, wondering just how good of a painter Jonghyun was and why I had never heard of him before.

~

“Jinki, when is your friend visiting?” Violet asked, as I checked out a regular customer’s goods.

“What friend?” I questioned, slightly confused. Violet didn’t go to university with me.

“Jonghyun! The painter friend!” she exclaimed, giggling a bit.

“Oh, I don’t think we are fri-” I began.

“Jonghyun? Did you say a painter?” the woman asked, forgetting to swipe her card the right way to pay.

“Yes!” Violet chirped. “Kim Jonghyun!”

“How did you know his full name Vio-” I tried to ask, but was cut off again.

“Kim Jonghyun? The Kim Jonghyun?” the woman gasped. “How do you know him boy?”

“I... he... he said he came here one time with his mother and thought I was... cool.” He didn’t say that, Onew, I thought to myself.

“I didn’t know who he was myself, until I looked him up, but I know his work. I envy his work,” Violet babbled, completely ignoring me as she always did.

“Boy, you better stay close to him,” the woman expressed, ignoring Violet for a turn. “You won’t know what you’ve lost until it’s gone.”

I looked around at the two women as they continued to talk on and on about Jonghyun. It had been awhile since I had heard from him, but I wasn’t sure if I should contact him. It felt weird to have a guy confess to you that you barely had an idea about.

~

I sighed heavily, sitting alone at one of the many circular tables located around the dance floor. I was at one of many galas I was scheduled to attend in this month alone for one of the paintings I had forgotten I had even painted. It was showcased up on the stage and they soon would be auctioning it off for a ridiculous amount and giving me the profits.

There were couples all around me, dancing, talking, babbling, and admiring the paintings. Some of them were people I knew, but others were complete strangers. One of them would take my painting, never fully understanding the feelings invested behind the brush , but what did it matter? I would get more useless money that I had no need for. The money wouldn’t fix my parent’s image of me.

I had quit  med school a few years ago. I was supposedly an aspiring doctor meant to follow in my father’s footsteps. I was to earn a living off of examining people for a few minutes for exorbitant amounts of money. Then I was to meet the girl of my dreams and marry her to produce three or four grandchildren. I didn’t want to examine sick people. I didn’t want to marry a girl. I didn’t want kids. I want art. I have art. I want a boyfriend. I.... have one?

My phone vibrated at that moment. My hand flew to the device hoping it was Onew, but I was disappointed as usual. It had been so long since I had seen him. I wish he would at least talk to me. I think I had been too forward or else he would’ve contacted me back. Unless.... unless he doesn’t like me.

I sighed, pulling the spare gala ticket out of my pocket remembering how I had hoped he would be the one to accompany me to such events. I could show him off to all the other artists and have something to gloat about. Being this accomplished was not very fun when you had no one to share your fame with. I really couldn’t share it with my parents ever since I had ruined my family’s “honor.” There was only one person I wanted to share this with, but he didn’t even want to call me back.

I took a glass of champagne from the waiter who had hovered over to the table and downed it, quickly replacing the empty glass on his tray, taking another two glasses. I sat there, remembering the adorable shyness that I had yet to crack on that boy. My phone rang this time, but it wasn’t Jinki. It never was.

~

It was a Tuesday. I had my day off today, but I was stuck in mandatory general education classes all day. That was alright I suppose since it was raining and there wasn’t much to do anyways on my days off. Currently I was sitting in my general maths that I shouldn’t have taken. I had tested out of math, but they still said I had to take it. The lesson was over logarithms, but I already knew how to take the log and natural log of things. My eyes glazed over and I began to drown out the lecturer as usual.

I looked down at my notes and noticed I had aimlessly been drawing without realizing it. There was a little man I had drawn, but he looked like someone I knew. I sat up, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. I looked at the drawing again and noticed it was a poorly drawn blonde with a pretty face. Jonghyun.

I sighed a little too loudly, inviting the whole class to turn and glare at me for a moment. I looked out the window, following the raindrops as they raced down the glass. I wonder what Jonghyun is doing right now, I thought to myself, pouting a bit. I wonder how many people he had charmed recently to get his way.

My eyes wandered beyond the racing waterdropplets to the murky landscape that was masked with the dull grey of rain. I locked my eyes on a bench in the distance that appeared to have a blonde on it. A lovely girl went by his side, cuddling next to the blonde, sharing a passionate kiss.

“Bastard!” I wailed, standing up. I quickly sat down, however, when I remembered where I was. The whole class, including the lecturer, was staring at me.

I bowed my head, sneaking a look at the pair out the window. I blinked a few times and they were gone probably because they never existed. I was just jealous I wasn’t with Jonghyun every minute, of every day. The thought of someone else taking my place in my absence killed me.

~

I had finally gotten a call from Jinki. You could say I was elated, but I was also upset. It had taken him so long to get back to me, I felt as if I didn’t know him anymore. It had been nearly two months since I had seen that boy and had taken him to the gallery.

I flopped on my bed, rolling on my stomach to properly view my phone. I scrolled through the numerous contacts until I had and found the man I needed. I quickly dialed his number and waited for him to pick up.

“Jonghyun! It’s been so long! How are you?” the deep voice on the other end exclaimed on the third ring.

“I’m good Minho. How are you?” I asked coolly, not nearly as bubbly as the charismatic museum owner.

“I’m really good. Have you painted anything new that you need displayed? I mean you are obviously busy with other showings and stuff, but if you want I could give your work a month long showing.”

“That would be great. I think my schedule for next month is pretty empty and I have a new series that hasn’t been shown yet.”

“Excellent!” Minho roared, clearly excited at the chance to share his best friend’s work.

“I was wondering if I could ask you a favor, though. For tomorrow. I know it’s short notice,” I began.

“No, no. Anything for you Jonghyun!”

“Can I rent out the museum tomorrow night at the end of day? I will pay for the building.”

“Yes, that sounds alright. Just don’t come until after 6 if that can be avoided. There is a school trip planned,” he explained.

“I wouldn’t ruin the kid’s time. I know how much you love them.”

“Alright then, buddy. I’ll get you all set up, just text me what you need. I have to go right now, but I’ll talk to you later alright?”

“Alright, Min,” I muttered, hanging up the phone.

I rolled over on my back, stretching my limbs out on my bed. I sighed to myself as I stared at the ceiling, wondering how the next day would go.

~

We were in the museum owned by Jonghyun’s friend, tension filling the large foyer.

“I didn’t call you because I was scared,” I pleaded, trying to stop Jonghyun from pacing back and forth. His nostrils were flaring, and his face was even more red than it had been in the car.

“I waited so long for you,” he hissed, avoiding my eyes. “It wasn’t just the two months of waiting for your call. It was the year of going to that shop to find useless to buy in order to bump into you when you were in a good mood, but that never happened.”

“I’m sorry, you have to give me a break though. I didn’t expect you to even want me to call you back.”

“Why would I give you my number then? Why would I even waste my time taking you out to show you a painting I painted of you?” he spat, finally meeting my eyes. There was a fire about him that was revealing the unholy demon behind his angelic appearance.

“I heard Violet and one of our regular customers talking,” I argued, beginning to finally lose my temper.

“And?”

“And they were talking about how well known you were in the art world or whatever it is you call your profession. You didn’t tell me you were famous.”

“I didn’t think it mattered,” he growled, grabbing my shoulders. “Would you have looked at me the same if I had told you of all my success? You probably would just laugh it off just like my parents did.”

He stared at me, his grip on my shoulders tightening on the pressure points, making my knees wobble. I bit my lip, trying to hide the pain I was feeling, but a single tear escaped my eye. He stopped, releasing me from his grip, backing away. I watched him leave for a moment, only to come back again still fuming.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, still shaking with anger. I wasn’t sure now what he was angry at, but I was concerned.

“Why would you think I would leave you?” I asked, stepping closer to him.

“Because everyone else has. I’m a disgrace to my friends, my family, the art community.”

“But you aren’t a disgrace to me,” I whispered, now face to face with him.

“Are you sure?” he huffed, looking away from me.

“Crystal clear, Kim Jonghyun,” I breathed, pulling him into a warm embrace. I buried my face in his jacket, allowing a few tears to escape. I felt so bad for him. I had caused him more pain than he had already had to endure, and here he was still trying to make amends.

“Let’s go,” he whispered, wiping tears away from my eyes, pulling me to his side, his arm still over my shoulders. “Now that we’ve had our first fight, let’s have our first dinner.”

~

“Aren’t you two just adorable!” Minho exclaimed, ushering us over to the little table for two in the last room of the museum.

We had walked around the entire museum, admiring the various works and styles that were on displaying. In the midst of all of that, we were talking and learning more about each other, slowly moving past what had happened in the lobby. By the time we had entered the last room on the tour and saw the little candle lit dinner prepared, I had all but forgotten about the tears shed.

“Thanks, Minho,” Jonghyun said, shaking his hand.

“Anything for my best friend and Jinki, is that right?” he asked, turning towards me with an extended hand.

“Onew,” I corrected, smiling as I took his hand.

“I hope I’m invited to the wedding,” he called as he walked out of the room and, I assumed, left the museum.

“Shall we eat?” Jonghyun asked, turning towards me. I nodded, and began to wobble over the the table surrounded by contemporary art pieces.

Jonghyun pulled my chair out for me, allowing me to get seated before he took his seat. We both prepared ourselves for eating, admiring the turkey dinner placed before us. We ate, talked, joked, flirted, and talked about each other, the mood never once becoming tense.

I began to get more comfortable with Jonghyun. I was less embarrassed than I normally would be when I accidentally missed his fork when he tried to feed me a bite. He too seemed to be becoming more comfortable with me, opening up about how he had become an artist and rose to the status he held in the art world.

By the end of dessert, we both were stuffed, and the food coma was setting in. I looked around at all the art pieces for the first time, getting up to examine each of them. One that particularly stood out to me was a bright little with house, floating in an abstract abyss. Jonghyun came up besides me, placing his arm over my shoulders.

“I really like this one,” I commented, pointing to the little house.

“I have one just like that,” he whispered, pressing his lips into my hair.

“Really?”

“Mhm, wanna see?”

I nodded, giggling. He took me back to his house which wasn’t exactly white, but it was good enough.

~

I didn’t know at the time of that first date, but that one night at Jonghyun’s became a habit. I rarely found myself at my dorm for the remaining years in university. Key didn’t seem to mind, especially since he started dating his current boyfriend, Taemin, sophomore year. Taemin all but filled the empty dorm doing various....activities.

Nevertheless, it had been four years since that first date. Four glorious years filled with laughter, long nights of studying for midterms I failed anyways, and many more wonderful dates.

“I can’t believe you finally graduated,” Jonghyun cheered, hugging my close. “I’m so proud of my little college graduate.”

“Thanks, babe,” I whispered into his shoulder, snuggling closer to him.

“And you just quit your job at this place forever,” he whispered in my ear, being cautious in case Violet was still lurking, even though she said she was leaving.

“Finally.”

I pulled back, looking into Jonghyun’s warm eyes, before kissing him. Our lips melted together, causing me to become a little light headed, even after all this time. He broke our kiss short, however, to reach for something in his pocket.

“What’s wrong?” I asked, as he dropped to his knee, but then I realized.

Before me was the angel I had met in this very store, eyes twinkling with playfulness, as he knelt on his knees with a little box. He opened it, revealing a ring.

“Onew, will you marry me?” he beamed, holding the box out towards me.

“Yes,” I nearly screamed jumping up and down squealing.

Jonghyun placed the ring on my left hand, ready to hug me, when I remembered I had something to give Jonghyun, too. I looked around behind the counter, searching for it, when I finally found it. I hid it behind my back as I walked back over to him. He cocked his head to the side as if to say ‘what is it.’

“Here,” I said, holding out the fat scrapbook in front of him.

He took it and sat down on the floor, opening to the first page. It was a picture of us that night we had our first official date. The pages following were various pictures of the both of us doing various things in various places. All of them were pictures I wanted to remember and I wanted Jonghyun to remember too.

“Onew,” he muttered, looking through all the pages. “This is beautiful.”

“Just like you,” I whispered, taking a seat next to him.

I leaned my head on his shoulder, and he embraced me. We looked at the scrapbook together, page by page, remembering the bad times we had overcome, and the good times that remained etched in our memories. The last page in the book was blank.

“What’s this for?” Jonghyun asked, pointing at the empty space.

“It’s for your first entry,” I said, smiling at him.

He leaned in for a kiss, but was interrupted by his phone ringing. He hesitated, lips lingering over mine, before he reluctantly answered the phone, placing it on speaker phone.

“Jonghyun!” boomed a loud, deep voice I knew all too well.

“Yes, Minho?” he sighed, still upset about the interruption.

“Did you do it? Did you ask Onew to marry you?”

“Yes,” he chuckled, looking over at me in time to see my cheeks begin to burn.

“Mark my words, Kim Jonghyun, I better be invited to the wedding,” he dictated, laughing into the phone.

We joined his laughter. After the phone call, we sat in the store for quite some time, thinking of the past, enjoying the present, and beginning to plan our future.