She used to fly.

Everything started with a flight.

It was Suzy's dream since she was born – to fly high, higher above anyone else - and since Myungsoo loved Suzy above anything else, he granted her this wish. Because she was an angel, after all, and angels needed wings.

So, one day, Myungsoo made wings. Wings made out of wax, for him and for her, and they shined brighter than anything else (in his eyes). It took him long, but the motivation was like the never-ending beam of Suzy's eyes when she saw Myungsoo working – it was there, it was infinite, and yes, he would do it. Sacrifice his sweat, blood, and time just to make his love happy.

And when they had the wings, Suzy couldn't help but shriek in delight. And Myungsoo was happy too.

"Can we fly now?" Suzy asked with the look of a child. Myungsoo smiled.

"Of course," he answered. "But beware: If you fly too close to the sun, the wax will melt."

"Uh-huh," she said.

"And don't fly too low, because if your wings touch the sea, you'll sink eventually."

"Uh-huh," she replied.

Myungsoo had a strong hunch that she didn't really listen to him.

So they flew together. They flew and flew and flew, and nothing could make her happier. (So nothing could make him happier). But as soon as there was no more land in sight, Suzy started flying higher. Myungsoo, forgetting what he himself had said, followed her.

(It was because all he did was following her, his entire life probably consisted of following her ever since he knew her, and by now, he knew of nothing else than following her.

Was this even love?)

They flew too close to the sun, and as usual, Myungsoo remembered his warning when it was way too late. He stopped while Suzy continued flying. (She was so greedy, he realized)

"Suzy!" he called out. "Suzy, stop!"

But she didn’t hear him. She flew endlessly, and by every passing second, it broke Myungsoo's heart more and more.

I have to let go of her, a voice in him said. She's so greedy. First she couldn't get enough of you, to the extent that you became a toy of her, and now she can't get enough of the flying, to the extent that she will be dead.

She will be dead.

Because of me.

Myungsoo wiped some of the tears away and let himself go with the winds of oblivion.

It's better that way.

-

Time passed. Myungsoo would never know how much; he actually didn't want to. He just knew that, whenever the sun shined, he would wait at the balcony for something; he didn't know what, but he still waited. He started waiting at mornings, when the sun beamed as a red ball, brighter than an infrared light, he still waited at middays, and he waited until the sun disappeared as a red ball.

"Stop playing hooky!" Sungyeol would say, a tall, somewhat handsome boy who looked more handsome if he didn't smile at all. But he did smile (of course he did.) and that way, he looked like a preschooler. "Stop playing hooky for somebody you don't even know!"

"I'm not waiting for somebody," Myungsoo protested. "I'm waiting for something."

"Something like money? Something like a girlfriend? If it's the girlfriend, then you're really pathetic, Myungsoo."

"Don't be stupid. Girls can't fly." As soon as he said that, he recalled a laugh. It was faint, but there. He recalled a laugh, a shriek in delight; it wasn't really detailed, but there.

Maybe girls can fly. Not all of them, though.

(He knew himself that that thought was stupid. Nevertheless, it seemed also a bit true.)

"Why do you always skip school at sunny days? You can't do that. And don't say you're searching for The Matrix, otherwise I'll call you Neo."

"I'm not searching for The Matrix. If I would search anything, then it would be C.C. or a death God."

"You anime freak!"

For some time, Myungsoo forgot the faint memory of the laugh while he fooled around with Sungyeol.

For now.

-

It began when he slept.

He dreamt of a girl – a pretty girl who flew. She had wings attached on her back which had a dim shine, and after some time, Myungsoo realized that they were from wax. When he called her out with a "hey", she didn't respond.

"Excuse me," Myungsoo called out again. But she didn't listen. Maybe it was because she flew high above him and he was on the ground.

He jumped, once, twice, thrice. "Yah! Excuse me!"

No response.

"Excuse me!"

He dodged and gathered all his power. I will do it this time, he told himself. This time, I'll do it.

So he jumped again, and the tips of his fingers seemed to touch her. "Excuse me!" he called out again. And this time, she turned back to him and-

Myungsoo looked into the serious face of Sungyeol. He was extremely pale, and sweat drops were gathered on his forehead, the younger observed.

"Sungyeol-hyung?" Myungsoo muttered and straightened up. In an instant, a flashing pain hit his head; it was worse than any kind of pain Myungsoo had felt.

"Wh-what happened?"

"You fell off the balcony," Sungyeol answered. "Thank God you live in the basement."

Fell off the balcony?

He only dreamt of the girl – and he remembered how he-

"I jumped, right?"

"You were sleeping, so I guess it was a dream? I don't know. I'm not a doctor."

Myungsoo looked at the worried eyes of Sungyeol and let his eyes wander. He realized that Sungyeol wore pajamas.

"Wait… what time is it? Why are you wearing pajamas? When did that happen?"

"Many questions, dude. It's three am now. And I wear pajamas because I was about to sleep. It happened around midnight – thank God I was still awake. It was me who heard something falling, and when I saw that it was you, I immediately called the ambulance. You've been unconscious for two hours now."

"Where are my parents?"

"Outside." There was a silence between them for a minute. The pain didn't really go away, and Myungsoo was wondering why, or how he even managed to do it. Was he sleepwalking?

No. Not him. He never sleepwalked. Not Myungsoo. Anybody but Myungsoo. Myungsoo wouldn't even move in the bed, how would he step outside then?

"Yah!" Sungyeol said all of a sudden and punched him in the arm. "Yah! You scared the hell outta me! Never do that again, okay?"

"Okay."

"Promise me!"

"Yes, yes, I promise."

(That was the only promise Myungsoo would break.)

-

From that day on, Sungyeol started sleeping in the same room with Myungsoo, partly because he wanted to, partly because Myungsoo's parents asked him. Every night, when Myungsoo stood up, Sungyeol would wake up and observe him. It made Myungsoo sad than anything else; looking at the worried, somehow even sad eyes of his best friend, and he desperately wanted the look to disappear. To made it appear less often (that's what he could do at the very least), he said to Sungyeol, "don't worry, I'm going to the toilet" when he was going to the toilet. But how could he stop it when it happened? He slept during that time, right?

Last time it was falling from the balcony.

And next time?

-

It was a memory this time, Myungsoo realized. Because this time, he somehow knew that he has already seen it. It had its nostalgic edges around it, much like a smell of coffee, and it felt simply familiar.

This time, he was working on something on wax (because no other material he knew was this soft yet hard), and he smiled all the time. He wondered why, though. It wasn't like working on wax was funny. No, it wasn't. It never was. It was hard, a work that took long. Anything but funny.

"When will it end?" a female, mezzosoprano voice asked. It was like the tender touch of a spring breeze, or a touch of gentle cherry blossoms – or the falling of golden autumn leaves.

Or simply, like his lover.

"It won't take long," he heard himself reply. She appeared in front of the wings, and Myungsoo smiled more when he saw her. She is indeed beautiful, and she is mine, he thought. (Or rather, his dream self thought.)

"Really?" She sighed playfully. "You don't look at me lately, do you realize this even?"

"I do, I do. But remember, I do this because of you."

She laughed. "I know," she answered playfully. "That's why I love you."

"Do you?" He smiled widely. "But you're so impatient, you know?"

"Ah, it's just a sign that I love you. A sign, Myungsoo."

"You're still supposed to call me oppa," he added and laughed.

The memory ended here, and Myungsoo again forgot to ask her name. At least, he knew that she was younger than him, hence the oppa.

-

When Myungsoo woke up, everything seemed fine. No falling, no hurting, nothing at all.

"Did nothing happen?" Myungsoo asked Sungyeol.

"Hmmm," Sungyeol answered, and in an instant Myungsoo knew that something was wrong. Sungyeol would never say "hmmm" if nothing would actually happen.

"It happened again, right?"

"No. You didn't fall. Thank God you didn't."

"What, then?"

Sungyeol didn’t reply.

"You never say hmmm when nothing happened. You say hmmm when something actually happened. I know you all too well."

Sungyeol sighed. "Well. You actually did sleepwalk, thankfully I could push you back."

"Only push me back, right? I didn’t hurt you, right?"

If Sungyeol was the girl in my dreams, Myungsoo thought, then nothing happened because I didn't touch her.

"You smiled when you saw me," Sungyeol said. "Have you dreamt of something pretty?"

"Not something, Sungyeol-hyung," Myungsoo answered. "Somebody."

"Somebody this time?" Sungyeol smiled. "Was it me?"

"No, you weren't. It was someone else."

And that was the conversation.

Thank God I've not done something bad, Myungsoo thinks.

(He just calls the demons with this.)

-

The next time is intense. It's an intense memory – or an intense dream – and it's so intense that it's like reality.

It's night, red lights are on, and Myungsoo's working. He's incapable of feeling, thinking, doing anything but cutting the wings for Suzy.

You're my only one, Suzy. Only you, Suzy.

Suzy.

Mine.

No – I'm hers. She isn't mine.

I'm hers.

Hers.

She appears, it's faint, but who cares – he knows that it's her, because nobody else than them are in this room.

Stop, a voice in him says. (Does this even belong to the dream). Stop, Myungsoo, it says. But he can't stop. He won't. Not when Suzy is there. He belongs to Suzy - how can he even resist?

He goes to her, his hands are all over her, and he presses his lips, just like that, because he knows, she'll reply. She'll reply to the kiss, because she's way better in kissing than him, of course she is, because she had countless boyfriends before and she, she is his first girlfriend and he is so so so clumsy in kissing, but she had told him that it's fine, and when she says it's fine then it is way more than just fine, no, it's perfect then, and he chases those it's fine literally.

It's fine.

It's perfect.

He's hers.

It's fine that way.

Hers. Only hers.

The red becomes all darker, a bit more dark, a bit more intense, the memories start to fly a bit more, a bit hasty, and then he's at the bed, she's at top, he's so ridiculously pathetic, him being at the bottom, it's really ridiculous, and she's at top and looks at him just like that, with those eyes, and he realizes that the hair is ridiculous, that her body is ridiculous, that her everything is ridiculous.

He loves her though. He is hers though.

(Why?)

-

It seemed like nothing had happened.

(Myungsoo didn't believe this.)

"Is everything alright, Sungyeol-hyung?" he asked during breakfast.

"Yeah, sure." (At least it wasn't a hmm.) But Myungsoo did notice. He noticed the trembling of Sungyeol's usual calm hands, the eyes which didn't look at him as he spoke, the insecurity in his voice.

Myungsoo knew him all too well.

"Something happened, right?"

"Do you remember your dream?" Sungyeol returned.

"My dream?" Myungsoo thought about it, and no, he didn't remember a thing. (Which was normal, of course.) "Hm. No, not really. Why?"

"Ah, it's fine," Sungyeol replied.

"Did something happen?"

"No, why should something happen? Everything went just fine."

Myungsoo didn't ask more. (Because Sungyeol wouldn't actually reply more.) But he did feel that something was wrong. Way too wrong to ignore it.

-

"I'm happy that he didn't fall off the balcony again," his mother said to Sungyeol at lunch. Myungsoo was standing outside and almost wanted to come into the living room, but he stopped. He wanted to listen to their conversation.

"Oh yes, I'm happy as well," Sungyeol answered.

"He doesn't do anything much, right?"

"He still sleepwalks, Mrs. Kim. Not as bad as the first time, but…"

"But what?"

Sungyeol hesitated. "Last time, he dreamt of a girl. I knew he dreamt of a girl because he kissed me."

Kissed? Myungsoo wanted to laugh, or cry, or to show any kind of emotion, but he couldn't.

Kissed my best friend?

Sungyeol?

"Oh gosh! Did he apologize?"

"Why should he apologize for something he doesn't remember, Mrs. Kim? It's a dream, after all. It's fine, because it wasn't really… well, it wasn't a tongue touch. Just… his lips pressing against mine. It's fine, really."

"Well, after hearing this, I can't really say if I'm really happy that he didn't fall from the balcony. I'm apologizing in his name, though. My son isn't really into boys, you know that."

"It's better, Mrs. Kim, really. And it's fine."

Last time I fell from the balcony, this time I kiss my best friend.

The former was better. Way better.

Myungsoo ran to the water tap, then, and cleaned his mouth with soap.

Falling is way better – at least there is a small moment of eternity before the impact.

-

Myungsoo was destined to find the girl in his dreams.

It sounded stupid, but if he kissed her, if he remembered her, that meant that she existed. She just had to.

The name. Just the name, and that's it.

His dreams had a connection to her, he felt. Because every time he dreamt, he got just a bit closer to her. If she had been this important to him, then he would do anything, anything, to find out who, and how, she really was. Completely forgetting the fact that he sleepwalked (and kissed his best friend and fell from the balcony), his head was filled with plans to become closer with this girl.

School was a great opportunity to sleep, he realized. There was a serene silence, only interrupted by the teacher's voice, which was like a lullaby in Myungsoo's ears. Of course, Sungyeol didn't really like it, but he didn't say anything.

-

The first dream he had at school was a memory, and the memory was him and her about to take off with wax wings.

The first dream led him to the rooftop, all alone, and when Myungsoo turned back, he saw that the door was actually closed. So he called Sungyeol and his best friend managed to open the door after half an hour. Sungyeol was so furious that he shouted at him a good hour long before he just shook his head and said, "You're stupid, after all, I didn't expect anything else from you."

The second dream he had was similar to the first, except that he flew this time and that she complained that she didn't fly.

The second dream happened during sports, he realized, and everybody just applauded him and said, "great job!" When he asked Sungyeol what happened, he said, "You were fantastic on the beam, really!"

I don't remember anything, though, Myungsoo thought.

So the dreaming kept on, with Myungsoo being on different places with every dream, and with no real progress regarding the dream girl. He probably saw more of the school during this time than during his whole school life. He found it funny. Sungyeol, however, didn't. One day, he bragged him outside and yelled, "Stop dreaming all the time! Don't you see what happens?"

(Of course he didn't. How could he? He was sleeping, after all.)

"But…" How could he explain the thing with the girl, even? Sungyeol wouldn't understand. Myungsoo couldn't even understand, how would his best friend do?

"There is no but! Don't you understand?" Tears geared up in the eyes of his best friend, and Myungsoo gulped. "Everytime you dream, something happens! You don't dream like others do! You fall from balconies, go somewhere and don't know how! Just – don't dream! It's all because of them! You worry us all! So stop dreaming!"

Myungsoo mistook this as don't sleep. So he started not to sleep at all. When his best friend was snorting loudly, Myungsoo would sit and stare at him, trying not to close his eyes. The moment I close my eyes, something bad will happen, he chanted in his mind.

Don't sleep. Don't sleep. Don't sleep.

Of course, it became worse day by day, it became harder day by day. His eyelids would just go down by themselves, the fatigue would just embrace him and the embrace would be so soft, so beautiful, so wonderful. He would hear the voice of the girl saying It's time to close the eyes, Kim Myungsoo, and he would resist.

(Because of his best friend, his parents, himself.)

But any kind of resistance would be broken, when it came to the almighty sleep, to the soft darkness.

(There's no Daedalus Sungyeol to warn him this time.)

-

It was a long dream this time.

He dreamt how he finished the wax wings, a wide smile on his lips, and he called out, "Suzy!"

So her name was Suzy, a part in Myungsoo thought (the conscious one.)

He realized that the Myungsoo in his dreams was something else, behaved different than him. He didn't know in which points they differed from each other; Myungsoo had just the feeling that the wax boy Myungsoo was different.

Maybe he was because he was so addicted to Suzy? He couldn't tell.

"Oppa?" She answered.

"I finished. We can start soon."

"Really?"

"Yes, my dear." He gave her a kiss on the cheek and she smiled widely.

"Can we fly now?" she asked, looking like a child who looked at a Christmas present. Myungsoo's smile widened.

"Of course," he answered. "But beware: If you fly too close to the sun, the wax will melt."

"Uh-huh," she said.

"And don't fly too low, because if your wings touch the sea, you'll sink eventually."

"Uh-huh," she replied.

 Myungsoo had a strong hunch that she wasn't really listening to him.

With care, he attached the wings on her shoulders. She shrieked in delight and said, "They'll look stunning on me!"

"Of course they do." He pressed his lips against her cheeks again, and she turned to him and attached his wings.

"They look stunning on you, too. Now you really look like an angel."

He chuckled. "I feel honored to hear this from the angel itself."

Suzy smiled, obviously flattered.

They went to the balcony, outside. The sun was shining brightly, cruelly, steadily. Myungsoo almost wanted to warn her again, but he stopped himself. She's old enough to know, he told himself.

"One, two, three!"

(Myungsoo realized now; he had a life before his grey something with Sungyeol, he loved Suzy, he used to love her, he was all hers, up until he had realized that she was only greedy. He had gone himself with the winds of oblivion, and they had become clouds that overshadowed the sky, and now, the sky of reality was clear before his very eyes.

The sun hurt, though. The blue hurt, though. The clouds were soft; the blue was strong, too strong for him.

I should've just left her, Myungsoo realized.

He realized this a bit too late.)

-

"Oh my god, really, he was actually extremely nice…"

"Suicide!"

"And he was so handsome, I would never believe it-"

"Suicide!"

If Sungyeol hated something from the bottom of his heart, it was gossip. Gossip was stupid, simply stupid.

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Ah, you don't know?" a girl replied, eyes huge.

"I don't, otherwise I wouldn't ask," he answered angrily.

"Ah, somebody from our school committed suicide," she said. Sungyeol immediately thought of Myungsoo, but nah, not Myungsoo, Myungsoo would never do this, he had never been suicidal, never ever. Not Myungsoo. Never Myungsoo.

(Right?)

"Who is he?" he inquired.

"If you don't know yet, it's better if we don't tell the name, because the headmaster said so. We call him L oppa."

L oppa? This sounded too strange.

I have to talk with Myungsoo, maybe he does know, Sungyeol thought and started moving. Something felt strange though. Sungyeol didn't exactly know what, but he felt that there would be something he wouldn't like at all.

(If he would just know.)

He arrived at the place where everybody gathered and looked around. No Myungsoo. Sungyeol furrowed his eyebrows. If something would happen, Myungsoo would certainly take a look at it, and be it only two seconds.

Something wasn't right. At all.

"Aren't you his best friend?" someone suddenly asked him. Sungyeol turned around and faced a boy, probably in his age.

"Whose best friend?" Sungyeol returned, but he knew the answer already.

No I'm certainly not the best friend of the victim no I'm not the best friend of him anymore 'cause he's stupid stupid stupid and I'm not the best friend of the victim no my best friend doesn't fall from rooftops or balconies or kisses his own best friend although he's straight no I'm not his best friend not anymore I'm not his best friend I'm not his best friend I'm not his best friend I don't want to hear it no I don't I really don't because I'm not his best friend because my best friend doesn't sleepwalk because he never did he is normal okay the victim isn't and therefore I'm not the best friend of-

"Kim Myungsoo is his name. I'm really sorry."

No I'm not his best friend don't be sorry I don't know him not at all we're not childhood friends we never were stop talking to me like that because I'm not his best friend

(Lies.)

Sungyeol goes to the body that lies on the green grass, and sees the familiar messy black hair, the familiar handsome face, the familiar tall body, the familiar ridiculous good-looking clothes. He smells the new fragrance of blood – it doesn't suit him. No, not this handsome boy. (Not to this handsome body.)

"Myungsoo?"

There was blood on his head, and the grass had an ugly brownish color, it looked so ugly, and the smell-

he's not my best friend because my best friend doesn't stink as ugly as this body.

"Oh, this boy? He had his eyes closed when he jumped," a girl said next to him. Sungyeol didn’t even know why he turned to her (the body was more interesting, more hypnotizing, and more emergent now), and when he saw her, he just thought, she's the culprit. She looked like the culprit. (Scratch that, she was) She didn't look pretty – at least not with the macchiato-brown hair, and the eyes which just didn't suit her. She looked just ugly, just like the blood, the smell, the everything on the pretty body.

Sungyeol opened his mouth, and a scream escaped. Just a scream.

a/n: Okay 4,200 words I've seriously gone crazy but what can I do? (WORD VOMIT AHEAD GUYS. I BLAME MISS ESEECH FOR THIS.) Heh, I think I extended and lengthened the prompt to something extremely ridiculous, but it still fits, somehow, lol. (and believe me, Suzy in Love Alone Era didn't really look pretty. Nah. And she's usually a pretty girl.)

I hope you don't cry now because the real soopid is still alive you've enjoyed your read, Elly.