Those eyes I never wanted to see again. How can I love someone like you.

 

“Can you bring this to Mr. Lee?” Siwon said to me. I am working at his company as his secretary. He was the one who found me and helped me to overcome everything. I still remember how my world fell apart. I still remember when I tried to end everything and how he stopped me. He was the one who fixed me. 3 years of crying, I remember those painful days, how every time passed that I think about him. After we talk I actually don’t know how to start. I am all alone now. All my dreams were shattered. He killed me that night. I want to kill both of them. I want to shout. I want to let it all out. Why did he do this? Am I not enough? Is it because I can’t give you a proper family that’s why you go to her? I remember you told me how you want kids. Is it the reason? I want to tell you all that. I vividly remember that scene, the two of you on our bed. I shouldn’t be thinking about this. I have Siwon. He loved me more than you did.

“Sure, just give me the address.” I said

“Here and also discuss to him what is inside because he is the type of person who doesn’t read something just given to him.” He gave me a piece of paper. “I am sorry I cannot come with you, I have so many things to do.”

“You don’t have to be sorry, it’s my work I am your secretary.” Then I bid my goodbye, he just kissed me on the lips.

As I was finding Mr. Lee’s place, i can’t help to be nervous because the way I am walking was the way to Donghae’s house.

It can’t be.

Just then I stopped to a very familiar place. It is impossible because the address is not the same as Donghae’s.

I knocked on the door. Someone opened it and to my surprise it is Donghae. I was shocked at the moment, well he was I don’t know, I can’t read his expression.

We just stood there and stare to each other, he was the one who broke the silence.

“Come in.” he said to me and I did what he said.

“Here are the documents.”

“I am not expecting you, I am expecting Mr. Choi to come.”

“He was so busy to come and hand you the papers.” He came to me and pinned me to the sofa.

“I am also not expecting you to be his secretary. So that was the proposal you are talking about.” He told me. I feel my heart beating faster.

Stop, you shouldn’t be nervous.

I looked away not wanting to look into his eyes because I was scared, scared the he might look right through me and know that I haven’t move on. I admit. I never stop thinking about him. I never stop. The thing is it’s not like before. It’s true that Siwon helped me but still I have a memory of him. Maybe that’s why. Maybe that’s why I can’t be truly happy.

Just then I saw something familiar, I can’t take my eyes off to it. He looked to the direction I am looking at.

“You keep it.” I bitterly smile while looking at the teddy bear. It was the teddy bear I gave him on his birthday.

“I kept everything. You are the one who forgotten everything.” Silent surround us. Neither one of us wanted to break it, afraid that we might not say the right thing to say. I haven’t forgotten. Everything about you not even a second, I have not forgotten about you. I still know everything. Everything. Everything that I don’t want to remember.

“I need to go.” I told him. I can’t take it anymore. There is too much emotion I can’t handle. I am not strong enough.

“Stay for just a few minutes.” He said to me with pleading eyes. Is it just me? Why? Just then I remembered Siwon. I can’t leave him.

“I can’t he’s waiting for me.” I told him but deep inside I really want to stay. I want to know everything that I left unspoken.

He hugged me to stop me. I missed this. How I wish he can hold me like this everyday.

“Please, don’t go.” he told me. He broke the hug and look at me straight in the eyes. His eyes are speaking. It feels like it’s talking to me.

Don’t let your walls fall down Hyukjae. I told myself. Not now. I don’t want to look weak in front of him. I don’t want to hurt again.

“Please, just don’t leave me again.” He said and kissed me fully on the lips. I should fight it, but I didn’t, instead I responded to it. It was so gentle as if I was a fragile glass he shouldn’t break. It kills me. I am feeling every thing. Every thing he wants me to feel. We are savouring the kiss, making the most out of it. I felt his hand ing my polo shirt. He then began teasing my hardened nub. I know that this is wrong it is leading to a mistake that I may regret. His hands made its way to my lower region. I groaned when I felt his hand on my crotch. I can’t help but moaned at that gesture. He unbuckled my pants and put it down along with my boxers. Now I am fully . He came up to me and kissed my neck, just then I feel his index finger teasing the slit of my already hard and leaking member. “Stop this.” He did stopped and all of a sudden I felt cold the warmth coming from him banished. He looked me in the eyes. His eyes were sad, so sad. “Do you want me to?” I can’t answer back. I don’t know what to say. I want him. I want him so badly. A tear fell from my eyes. I hate myself because I realized, I am falling down once again.

 

 

 

A/N :

this is the best i can do.. it's now time for my lovely readers to make their own ending.. because i really can't decide between Donghae and Siwon (Siwon is too good for me).. I hope everyone like it.. Lovelots!!

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