I turned the TV off as soon as the program I’ve been watching ended. I held my grumble soul and walked to my bedroom. Some of my dormitory friends were looking at me confusedly; “Are you that mad?” asked one of them.

I hissed, “No.”

“We know that you like Leo the best among VIXX members, but it doesn’t mean you are allowed to hate all the girls around him,” said another.

I groaned, “It is not even your business, whether I hate that Minah or Tia.”

“But—”

I ignored them; they didn’t know what was really happen between me and Leo. I crawling back to my bed and buried my face on my pillows. I cried a lot. I knew I was childish, got angry because of that TV program. Or whatever that involve VIXX with girls, especially if it was about Taekwoon, or yeah people called him Leo. I hit my pillow and punched it with my fist, I released my anger to them, and it didn’t help. I still could feel the hole in my heart. I couldn’t protest, for every jealousy I felt toward him. I wanted to yell out, I wanted to kick Taekwoon because he agreed on the script or I wanted to kill myself because I didn’t grow more mature than this. What was mine, mine. I didn’t give a damn how much other people wanted mine, because I owned it and I didn’t like to share.

I applied that theory on Taekwoon.

Taekwoon didn’t own a phone, neither did VIXX. Hakyeon was the only member who got a phone, yet he wouldn’t allow Taekwoon to call me—or even text me. The worst was I got angry with him, but I couldn’t express my anger to him. I couldn’t meet him, I couldn’t call him, I couldn’t do anything but crying alone like this.

Taekwoon was a good boyfriend, I believed it. But held Minah’s hand and knowing that Tia obviously showed that she liked him on that program was out of the topic. I agreed on this secret relationship because I was sure Taekwoon wouldn’t do something that harms us.

Someone phoned me, unknown number.

“Who the hell is this? Don’t call me with private number you chick!” I yelled as soon as I swept the screen to answer the call.

The soft voice replied me, “Ugh that’s scary.”

I almost fell from my bed to hear his voice. He chuckled, “Are you that mad because After School Club you just watched?”

“I didn’t catch the show. I was sleeping,” I lied.

“Then you should sound happier because I phoned you,” he said. I grinned, “Why should I? You sure seem happy because everyone has their eyes on you.”

“You watched it,” he giggled.

“Why do you phone me?” I asked—ignore his words. He sighed, “It’s not me who asks Tia to like me, and make it obvious on the screen. You shouldn’t get angry to me, it’s not fair. You always put all the blame on me of that stuff.”

“Fine, I will blame Tia and Minah.”

“Hey, that’s even worst.”

I whimpered, “I want to take a shower, you better wrap this conversation quick.”

I heard Taekwoon let another sigh out, “Why are you doing this to me? I’ve missed you for like weeks, and when I got a chance to talk to you like this, you ignore me.”

“Because you are a jerk.”

“You date a jerk.”

“Then how about split up, uh?” I said—and seconds later I regretted what I’ve said to him. He replied me, “Do you really want to split up with me? You know you can’t take your words back, don’t you? What will you do if I say yes?”

“Taekwoon, I’m—”

He cut my words, “I know you’re jealous. I’m sorry. It’s not like I did it on purpose, right? I’m an idol now, you should’ve known that I would do those stuffs on TV, scripted or not. But it doesn’t mean that I never think about you when I did it. You crossed on my mind, like every second, I’m afraid that I will hurt you, at the same time I’m wishing that you will understand my job, I love you, and don’t ever doubt that, but if you want to split up with m—”

“I love you too,” I whispered softly, he stopped his words. I added, “That’s why I got jealous too much, too easy. I’m sorry.”

“How about split up?” asked Taekwoon, and it froze me out. I held my breath; I knew it was my fault because I started the topic first. My vision started to blurry, tears covered my iris.

“My answer is absolutely no,” he said. “And I don’t bother to ask yours.”

pardon me bcs this is about me who easily gets jealous. first, leo let minah of girls day held his hand, second, in ASC tia obviously shows that she likes leo ((as an idol of couse but still yeah)) and also eunji from ninemuses for held his arms for 3idiot show, so i wrote this. i'm sorry.

REALLY SORRY. and i don't hate those girls--fyi.