“What is that, Su Ji?” a boy asked to a girl who was holding a white unfamiliar object.

  “It’s called Teru Teru Bozu, Myungsoo,” Su Ji replied.

  “What is Teru Teru Bozu?” asked Myungsoo, his tone crooked on saying the unfamiliar words. He came closer to have a better look of the object. It looked like Casper, he thought. “A Japanese Casper?”

  Su Ji shook her head. “Teru Teru Bozu is a traditional Japanese doll,” she explained. “It’s a handmade doll,” she added.

  “That’s quite scary doll to keep,” Myungsoo commented, imagining how the girls would scream in the middle of the night when they were creep out by their own doll. “What are you going to do with it?”

  “I’m going to hang it on the balcony.” Su Ji walked toward the balcony, sliding the door opened. The cold wind of the night ambushed, hitting the open spot of her body.

  “Won’t it make the doll even looks scarier?” said Myungsoo. “Why do you need to hang it there?”

  “We hang Teru Teru Bozu to ask for a good weather tomorrow; to prevent the rain,” Su Ji explained as she tried to reach for the robe on her balcony’s ceiling. Myungsoo leaned closer to help and tied the tissue paper doll to the robe.

  “So it’s a charm to prevent the rain,” Myungsoo concluded. “Do you have something to do tomorrow?”

  Su Ji looked at her hanged doll, swayed by the night’s wind. The doll was a white stain in the midst of the black sky, just like the stars, both was filled with wishes.

  “I just hope it won’t rain tomorrow.”

  It rained the next day. The rain also happened to destroy the Teru Teru Bozu.

…

  “Su Ji!” Myungsoo needed to shout for his voice to be heard by the person a few meters away from him. His shoes and the tip of his pants were soaked because of the puddles. He didn’t mind, he kept running toward the girl who stood in the middle of the field, completely drenched.

  Su Ji turned her head to Myungsoo, between the strands of her drenched fringe; she could see he was running. She heard her name was being called for a few time more, she didn’t answer, but her eyes were on him.

  When Myungsoo arrived, right in front of Su Ji, he could see how pale the girl had become. There, pale color showed in the place where it used to be rosy. He swept her hair from her face. Then he touched her cheeks with his palms, cupping it, hoping there were some warmth left so he could share it—if it wasn’t give it all—to the freezing girl in front of him.

  Su Ji let Myungsoo did what he had always did every time he found her after the rain stopped. There was towel to dry her hair and his jacket to wrap her body. There were blows of air from his mouth to her cold hands. There were few hugs to give the warmth. Warming her after the rain what he had always did every time Su Ji stood in the middle of open place while it was raining, and cold was what Su Ji had always been, whether when it was raining, or after rain, or even without anything to do with the rain.

  “Let’s go to my place. It doesn’t rain anymore.” Myungsoo knew he could never bring her back if it still raining.

  Su Ji agreed on going to his place, she took his hand and they walked side by side, the water echoes every time they moved their feet. They were drenched, they didn’t mind.

  In the midst of their deafening walk, Su Ji who even tough agreed on going with Myungsoo, said to Myungsoo in almost a whisper yet her voice was as clear as  crystal.

  Myungsoo could hear Su Ji said, “It doesn’t rain for you, maybe, but it always rains for me.”

…

  Myungsoo took off his black jacket and put it on Su Ji. She was wearing a white shirt and it disturbed him how the man had been gazing at her see-through shirt.

  “Do you like the rain, Myungsoo?” Su Ji asked.

  “No,” Myungsoo shortly replied.

  “Why?”

  “It feels like it drowns you.”

  Su Ji hummed, signaling that she could relate to his answer. Su Ji took a step forward then reached for the rain drops with her hand. Myungsoo watched how the rain drops fell gracefully from her slanted fingertips.

  “How about you?” Myungsoo voiced, his eyes was on her.

  “I love it,” Su Ji answered right away. Smile formed on her shivering lips.

  “Why?”

  Su Ji turned her head to Myungsoo, replying his gaze. Her eyes were on his and he realized her smile was a gnawing smile. Su Ji’s eyes were still on Myungsoo as she took steps back from where she stood. Five steps from the shelter, right where the rain could hit every spot of her body, she stopped. Myungsoo walked closer, stopped before the roof ended. The rain was loud but Myungsoo could hear Su Ji said,

  “Rain tries to drown you but it can’t. You are still breathing.”

…

  “You should stop this habit, you know,” Myungsoo began. The heater was on and it enough to keep his apartment room warm. Su Ji walked toward Myungsoo, she had just finished bathing. She was wearing Myungsoo’s shirt and sweater. She had her own clothes here, but she preferred Myungsoo’s clothes when it was cold; it somehow, warmer.

  “What habit?” Su Ji took a seat. She put her palms on around the cup of hot chocolate Myungsoo had prepared for her.

  Myungsoo scoffed, “You know what I’m talking about.” He took a sip of his own hot chocolate then proceeded to stand behind Su Ji. Myungsoo took the towel that circled around her neck and helped her to dry it as Su Ji enjoyed the warmth of hot chocolate and Myungsoo’s heater.

  “Stop being in rain,” Myungsoo emphasized after getting no response from the sitting girl. Su Ji bit her lips and rolled her eyes, a sign that she was processing his words. Stop being in rain, he said, and she thought about it inwardly over and over again.

  She can’t.

  “Stop standing under the rain every time it rains.” He added, somehow the meaning of his order changed. Su Ji could appreciate this one more.

  “Why?” she asked after sipping her chocolate.

  “It’s not good for your health.”

  Mentally or physically? (Su Ji inwardly asked.)

  “You’ll get sick.”

  I’m still considered as healthy?

  “I have you, though. You’ll take care of me. So it will be okay,” Su Ji answered lightly. This sentence was safe enough to be let out.

  “It doesn’t mean you are allowed to violate your body,” Myungsoo sighed. He was still softly drying her hair by towel.

  Su Ji suddenly stood, stopping Myungsoo from drying her hair. She took her chocolate cup and walked toward the windows. Su Ji opened it by one hand and there was a chill when once again the cold wind bumped into her. Su Ji climbed up and sat on the windowsill. Myungsoo hoped his clothes were enough to keep her warm.

  She could see the hanged Teru Teru Bozu, drenched. The wind was making fun of it by swaying it around. Su Ji lost the count of the Teru Teru Bozu she made. Was it the tenth? Twentieth? All got drenched in the end. Even the Teru Teru Bozu couldn’t save her.

  Su Ji swayed her legs playfully as she gave Myungsoo a joyful smile. “And again, I like the food and drink you always prepared for me every time I get drenched.” Su Ji held the cup with her two hands and giggled softly as she enjoyed every sip of it.

  “You know I could always make it for you even without you being almost frozen.” Myungsoo answered. His heart shivered seeing the beautiful maiden on his windowsill, being as playful as she used to be, with the gnawing scenery behind her.

  Her black hair fell fragilely and by the wind’s help, the strands of her hair dances softly around her bittersweet profile. Her black eyes twinkled every time she spaced out, and before tears fell, she would sway her legs again, back forth, back forth, pretending she was fine. Her fingernails traced the windowsill, suddenly changed into an inkless pencil, it wrote down every drop of her rain.

  Myungsoo watched the beauty as it soon gradually faded, starting by the stop of her swaying legs. Su Ji lifted her legs and curled up on the windowsill. Then her hair stopped dancing and but still leaned gracefully on her fragile shoulders. Her face became dejected and her eyes started to twinkle more. Burying her face on her own legs and she enjoyed the hug she got from hugging her own legs. The sun set behind her, giving her a perfect frame which matched with her gnawing expression.

  While Myungsoo kept gazing at her, bewitched by Su Ji, he could hear how Su Ji broke the two-faced silent by saying,

  “Then stop the rain for me, Myungsoo. Stop the rain so I don’t need to be there.”

…

  Myungsoo ran through the hallway. His steps were as messy as his thought. Before a bead of sweet could trail his profile, he leapt to the heavy rain. It took a second for water to trail all over not only his profile, but all his body. It was fortunate that he had left his bag along with his phone and camera on the third floor of the building right in front of the window which showed him an obscure sight—a girl standing under the rain.

  “What are you doing?” he said. He needed to shout or else the rain sound would swallow his voice.

  “I’m loving the rain,” Su Ji answered. Her voice was calmer, he could hear her clearly.

  “What?” he shouted once again, there was a tone of disbelieve. Su Ji didn’t say anything. So Myungsoo continued, “Do you really need to stand under it to love it?”

  “Yes,” she muttered. Myungsoo couldn’t hear her voice but he could see how her lips signaled yes.

  “Why?”

  “It gives the same feeling as loving him.”

  “How?” Myungsoo finally could utter a word after being pierced by one word from her answer.

  “Loving him is like being in rain.”

  He could have sworn that the water had filled his lungs and became the reason why he found it hard to breath. It rained for Myungsoo. So Myungsoo took a step closer to his refuge, he embraced her as if she was the roof that could protect him from his rain. That was funny; Su Ji was his rain. Still he embraced her.

  Having her lips near his ear he could hear Su Ji trailed,

  “Hey, Myungsoo. Do you know?

  They resemble each other; him and the rain.

  Both are atrocious.”

  That was the first time Myungsoo found Su Ji standing under the rain. It wasn’t the last. After that, he found her standing under the rain every time it rained.

…

  Myungsoo was on the second floor of his university. In front of him was a window which was the only thing that stood between him and the rain. He opened the window to have a better look of a person that was standing on the middle of the university’s field.

  There was something exquisite every time he looked at her being violated by the rain. A painful beauty which he couldn’t help but to admire. He was just like her; both loving their rain.

  He looked at her and once again remembered the lie she had told him in the past. An obvious lie he always noticed every time she found her in rain. Myungsoo scoffed,

  “Su Ji, you are a liar. You are drowning.”

…

  It was Saturday and it had not rain for a week. Myungsoo sat on Su Ji’s apartment sofa with a plate of kimchi stew on his hand. It was the only real food that Su Ji could make. Actually, it was the only food she could ever bother to learn on how to make it. Myungsoo always worth her effort, she thought.

  Saturday was their day—Myungsoo and Suzy. It had been like that for the past couple of months. Anywhere was fine, anything was good, made some memories then let it be eternal through his viewfinder. After all, this was just a replacement for their—Suzy and not Myungsoo—Saturday.

  Myungsoo finished his kimchi stew while Su Ji was still in the bathroom. That was off, he thought. “I’ll be ready before you finish your kimchi stew” was the deal she always made with him.

  Myungsoo walked toward the bathroom and stopped in front of the closed door. He called for her name, once, twice, thrice, she didn’t not answer. Even without turning the knob, Myungsoo sure that Su Ji was still inside. He could hear the sound of dropping water from the shower which resembled the rain sound, the sound which he was so familiar with.

  The sound that always made him felt anxious for it always reminded him that the girl he fell in love with was violating herself under the rain at the moment. Then it hit him. Like every time the rain sound reached him and he knew where to find Su Ji and knew what she was doing. This time it him just like that.

  “I’m coming in,” he told her, not asking for permission, though. He waited three seconds; somehow he knew she wouldn’t come out even if he counted more. When three seconds passed, Myungsoo grabbed the bathroom door knob. If he got it right, he didn’t need a force to open the door.

  He was right, the door wasn’t locked.

  Myungsoo walked in and stood a few steps away from Su Ji. He stood there like he had always been and Su Ji let the water pour on her like it had always been.  Myungsoo stayed silent, afraid that the next sound that came from him would spill all the disappointment he tried to hide.

  But Su Ji was too aware of how big of a disappointment she was in his eyes,

  “I tried, really, I tried. I thought this time I’ll get over it. The sky even heard my plead to stop the rain.” Su Ji hoarse voice battled with lethal drop of waters, it reminded him the first time he saw her in rain. Her words gave the same pain.

  And as if she knew that he was willing to bear more pain for her, Su Ji continued, “But I still can’t, Myungsoo. I miss him. I miss him so much.

  I’m sorry.”

  Myungsoo walked closer to turn off the shower and stopped her own made rain. But even after some moments, water still trailed her face. Myungsoo recognized those drops as tears.

…

  “Myungsoo, I once thought you resemblance Teru Teru Bozu.” Su Ji muttered.

  “What make you change your mind, then?” Myungsoo replied.

  “There is no black Teru Teru Bozu,” she answered, referring to all black fabric that filled up his closet. Myungsoo smiled upon her tease.

  “Then what am I now?”

  Silence, a visual of an object which matched with her description of him crossed her mind, “Umbrella,” she answered.

  “Why umbrella?”

  “You can cover me from the rain,” silence, then she continued, “But you can’t stop the rain.”

…

  “Su Ji, let’s not do this anymore.” Su Ji stood right before the roof ended. Myungsoo’s voice was weary. He was weary. But his grip on her arm was still firm.

  “I wish I could,” Su Ji replied, her eyes were on his hand. “Or at least, I wish you could save me,” she softly murmured.

  “Why can’t I?”

  “You don’t understand what it means to be in rain.”

  Silence from the two, noise from the rain. Myungsoo wanted to shoot it back, but he felt that he didn’t have any bullet to be shot. The grip on Su Ji’s arm loosen, Myungsoo looked down. A piercing pain came across Su Ji when he did so.

  Another silence, this one beat the loudness of the rain. Su Ji formed a bitter smile, this time it was her turn to feel disappointed. Su Ji reached for Myungsoo’s hand which still rested on her arm, wanting to cast it aside. She was half way but then Myungsoo suddenly circled his arms around her, pulling her closer because he knew in a moment she would have stepped into the rain if he didn’t do so.

  “Maybe I don’t know. But still, it is impossible for me to give up on you. I won’t give up on you.”

  Su Ji replied his embrace by clutching on his shoulder. She was covered from the rain at that moment, he was her comfort. “Myungsoo, I’m tired,” she began, she leaned on his shoulder. “What can you do if I tell you how it feels?”

  Su Ji broke the hug and smiled at Myungsoo. She took his hand. “I’ll show you how it feels,” she said and she stepped into the rain. With both hands still tangled, she brought Myungsoo with her.

  Myungsoo followed her small runs. He pressed her hands due the coldness. The rain was harsh and the wind was strong. His body shivered with every little runs they took. They stopped on the middle of the field. His body was already freezing by then, but what concerned him was the shivering body next to him.

  How could she stand it every time it rains?

  Myungsoo thought they would stood like this until the rain stopped just like what she did every time it rained. But suddenly, Su Ji released his hand and sat down on the tarnished ground.

  “What are you doing?” Myungsoo shouted so the rain couldn’t swallow his voice.

  “Follow what I do. I’m showing you what it means to be in rain,” she replied him. Myungsoo stood, dumbfounded, but the soon followed to sit next to her. Once again he was proven wrong when he thought this was she wanted.

  Su Ji lay herself down on the tarnish. Mud and dirt surrounded her while the lethal drop of water violated her front. Myungsoo eyes widened and he started shouting, asking her what she was doing and telling her to stop.

  Su Ji didn’t say anything, didn’t move an inch, and her eyes were closed. Myungsoo knew it was no use to talk to her. The last view he saw was Su Ji’s hair floated on the turbid water before he lay down next to her and felt what it meant to be in the rain.

…

  The rain stopped when he thought he had reached the bottom of the ocean. If he could describe it with one word, it was a simple, terrifying. He couldn’t open his eyes, he couldn’t open his mouth, and the only sound he could hear was the gnawing mourns of the rain. It took him less than five minutes to find out why she didn’t answer him when he called for her before. The rain was numbing them.

  Myungsoo almost forgot the fact that he was still alive; the struggle to breath was his only reminder. It was madness. The girl next to him was the only thing that kept him sane.

  He looked to side and found the clear view of Su Ji’s face without drops of rain standing between them. He cried, almost, not because the fear, but because the understanding. While instead, Su Ji was already crying, again not because the fear, but because the understanding. She reached for his hand which she purposely let go before, with her wan lips and remaining voice, she pleaded, “Save me, Myungsoo. The rain has stopped for you. But it… it still rains for me.”

…

  Both got high fever after that. Su Ji entered the hospital for two days while Myungsoo was enough with a normal check up. Myungsoo healed after three days and on the fourth day, he stayed on Su Ji’s place to take care of her until she was healed. On the seventh day, a week after their ‘brave’ action, both were already laughing at it.

  On Saturday, Myungsoo and Su Ji had their regular date. This time, they went on stargazing. Both lay on the thin fabric, Su Ji used Myungsoo’s hand as pillow, both facing the night sky. It wasn’t the time, but she wished that she could witness the star rain.

  “It never dark out there. There is no blackout. There is enough time to do everything,” Su Ji said to Myungsoo.

  “I thought it is the same here,” Myungsoo replied. “It never stops here. The world keeps spinning, while the stars keep shining. Here is a busy as there in universe, I believe. In a minute, billions things could happen, billions things have changed. We also have the chance to do everything.” Myungsoo stopped there, taking a break and took a deep breath.

  “Su Ji,” he continued. Su Ji hummed in reply. “Live goes on. Whether in here or even in the universe. They never stop, they do not wait. And even when you are one of the most precious things that happen in this world, they still won’t wait for you.

  I, Su Ji, more than willing to break the clock, to close the way, and refuse the future, just so I may remain on your side. But Su Ji, as the live goes on, I am confident that one day in the future, there’s a day for us, where the rain stops for you and I am the one who stops it.”

  Su Ji turned her head and faced Myungsoo, her eyes became one of the star as it twinkled on his sight, “How if that day doesn’t exist?” she asked him.

  Myungsoo gave her a smile. “There’s enough time to do everything. There is a day for us.”

  “I may not give anything to you in return.”

  Myungsoo took his time to answer. He started slowly, “To be frank, I do believe someday we could be,” he confessed, fluttered. “But if that day turns out to be the day we are living now, and what we could be is best friend, and this is my limit of having you.”

  “Su Ji, it is more than enough for me.”

  Myungsoo sat up, carefully removing his arms under Su Ji’s head. He grabbed for his bag, trying to look for something in it. He took out an envelope and handed it to Su Ji.

  “I thought about it again and again. And I realize I can do nothing about your past. So let’s work on your future, Su Ji.”

  Su Ji opened the envelope, took out papers from it and while she studied the papers and came to realize what they were, Myungsoo asked, “Would you like to give it a try?”

  Su Ji looked at Myungsoo, his reflection scattered on her teary eyes. “Thank you,” she mouthed. Myungsoo chuckled in response and so did Su Ji between her soft sobs. Su Ji’s face heated from the sudden comfortable warmth. She looked down to hide it and Myungsoo ruffled her hair when she did so.

 “Thank you,” she whispered again. The paper from before was firm on her hand, on it was written:

 

NAME      BAE/SUJI

FLIGHT    KE 192                   TO DPS/BALI

…

  “Myungsoo, here!” Su Ji waved her hands to signal Myungsoo where to find her. It was easy to find her on crowd. People would call him desperate, but that had become one of his habits when it came to Su Ji. Myungsoo waved back, his other hand was holding his suitcase.

  “Have you waited for long?” Myungsoo asked when he reached Su Ji, she shook her head as respond. Myungsoo reached for Su Ji’s luggage and brought it with him.

  “Let’s go,” he told her. Su Ji grinned and gave a strong nod. She fed Myungsoo while they were walking to the entrance with the fast food she bought while she was waiting for Myungsoo before. While she did so, she came to realize one thing that had been bugging her vision since then.

  “Wait,” she said. She fed Myungsoo with the last remaining food then took a step back, her eyes were checking him. “This is weird..,” she said with suspicion.

  “What is?” Myungsoo replied, trying to hide his grin.

  “You are..,” Su Ji trailed. “white…”

  Myungsoo failed to hide his grin and Su Ji could clearly notice it. “Well, you better get used to it because I bring dozens of it in my suitcase,” he chuckled.

  Su Ji formed a questioning face, “Why? I thought for you no black means the same as wearing no clothes at all.”

  Myungsoo gave the same questioning look, “Wasn’t it you the one who told me that there is no black Teru Teru Bozu?”

  Su Ji’s face heated upon a realization. Myungsoo smiled in warmth,

  “Su Ji, I’m on my way on becoming your Teru Teru Bozu.”

…

Thank you for readers. I do hope I could read your comment or even a review.