I can hear them on the other side of the wall. Jo my cousin and her boyfriend Kang Jun. Jo and I have know eachother for years now, she moved in with me when her parents kicked her out. Me being a trainee, I don’t have much money myself, but I did let her into my flat, into my life and she well let’s just say she’s not that nice and fun anymore.

Everynight I have to lock myself in my room and listen to music, cause she brings her boyfriend over. I’m not sure of what they do, but I don’t sit and listen to find out. 

I introduced them to eachother, Kang Jun was my absolute best friend, we met cause we were both trainees, he always helped me for extra hours in dance practices. Eventually he was picked for a band and debuted. When Jo moved in she made sure I introduced her to all my ‘hot guy friends’. I did. They met. They started dating. 

But everyday and everynight that I have to lock myself in my room not to hear them laugh with eachother, I cry because I’m not the he’s laughing with. For months I’ve been hed over heels with him. His eyes, his lips, the way he smiles, or talks or hugs me. Or used to.

Jo can be, well, possessive. We grew apart in the last few weeks. i have to live with her so I rather stay away and avoid trouble.

I lay down in my bed, the music in my ears muffling the sounds coming from outside my door, funny enough his song is playing.

I laugh to myself cause the lyrics are so relevant.

Do you really like that person?

That guy doesn’t know how to love you

I would be a better fit than that guy next to you

Waking up the next day I found Kang Jun in the kitchen, shirtless. I can feel the heat rising to my cheeks

‘Good morning’ I avoided eye contact with him, as soon as he saw he tried his best to hide his body as well

‘Morning’ I could see him scratch his neck from the corner of my eye

God how much I loved him, everything about this man made my heart beat faster

‘So…’ I didnt really know what to say, it was obvious they had slept together, what was I supposed to say ? Congratulations ?!

He reached to hug me, i fought it a bit, but his strong grip and warm skin against me gave me reassurance, so i just lingered in his arms for a second

‘nothing happened’ he whispered in my ear. It was like he was reading my thoughts

‘Yeah right…’ I tried brushing it off with a joke as we broke apart 

His face was serious all the sudde giving me a light inside my chest. So they weren’t together ?!

And why did he felt the need to let me know ?

That night I stayed up, I had auditions the next week, so i was practicing as much as I could during the day and nervousness was keeping me up at night. Eventually I fell asleep on the sofa, only to be woken up by Jo screaming from her room. 

I look to my phone, I have 5 misse calls, all from Kang Jun. Looking at the time it was way past 2 am. What could have happened ?

I rushed to Jo’s room, to find her pulling her own hair, make up smuged in her face and tears rolling down. She looked crazy, hes eyes wide open, and fingernail marks along her arms.

‘How could he have done this to me!!’ she was yelling and muttering to herself

‘Jo?’ I walked in cautiosly, she didn’t aknowledged me right away ‘What happened?’

She turned to me with her devil eyes, and started shouting incomprehensive words.

I didn’t know what happened, but she was blaming me for it.

I ran out, I don’t have to deal with this. Grabbing my phone, I walked out of the appartment to be met with the cold air.

Dialing Kang Jun’s number I took a taxi to his dorm. I have been told off by their managers because he kept taking me there, people could see and start rumours. But truth is I was friends with all the c-clown members and we had nothing to hide really.

He finally picked up the phone

‘Hello!’ he picked up, unlike Jo, he sounded happy.

‘What happened?’

He took a paude, his tone changing right away.

‘Where are you?

‘Don’t ignore my question Kang Jun, what happened?’

‘Where are you???’

‘I’m by your dorm’

‘Come up’ he said and hang up.

i wasn’t about to freeze to death, so I jumped on the lift and pressed the number that would lead me to his floor.

As soon as I saw him, I ran to him. His eyes were so bright in the dim light of his hallway. He had his arms opened, ready to greet me and I sank in his warmth for longer than I was meant to.

‘Kang Jun, we need to talk about Jo’

He nodded

‘I broke up with her, we’re over. She’s not apart of my life anymore’

‘What? But what happened?’

‘It doesn’t matter!’

He couldn’t even face me anymore

‘Kang Jun’ I grabbed his chin and turned his face to meet me. His eyes found mine and without any hesitation from his part, he kissed me.

The moment I have been waiting for what felt like forever. He was here, he was kissing me. I could feel his heart beating so fast, and i’m sure he could feel mine as well. His hands pressed against my cheeks preventing me from moving even an inch. He smile in the kiss making my knees go even weaker. Out of breath I held onto his shoulder and slowly pulled away from his oh so sweet lips. 

He had a smirk on his face

‘Why ? ’ I managed to mutter out

He chuckled ‘It was always you’

I stood breathless in his embrace, starring into his deep brown eyes. I could see his lips moving,but his voice seemed to come from a far place. Like in a dream. I wanted to pinch myself to mke sure I wasn’t about to wake up.

‘What about Jo?’

‘It was never love. She was selfish, she was picky, she was mean. I couldn’t even stand to be kiss her’

‘Then why …?’ I forgot how to complete a sentence. I was exploding with so much joy

‘The managers wanted me to find a girlfriend… I don’t know why, but at the same time she came along and I thought why not. But everytime I was with her I could only think of you. Being in your flat, knowing you were just outside the door made me want to explode!’

‘What happens now?’ i asked, everything was so confusing, yet being here in his arms felt so right

‘Now…’ he sighed ‘I don’t know. I broke up with her, me and her… we’re done. and i’m done wasting time. We’ve been friends for so long now. I am confortable with you like no one else. you know everything about me, we’ve been through so much together. I love you’

I smiled, i’ve been dreaming of this moment for so long.

‘I love you’ he repeteaded . Still i couldn’t mouth any words out ‘Did you know that?’

This was it, now I had to say something and I was not about to break his heart

‘I… I love you too.’

He leaned down and kissed me leaving me breathless once again.