“Did you get beaten for my share?”

“I didn't get hit that much.”

“Didn't we agree not to do this?”

“I couldn't do that.”

“Seriously. Does my leg get better if you do this?”

“Then what? I can't pretend it didn't happen. And I can't make it go away either.”

“So are you going to continue being this way?”

“I know I can't pay you back for what I've done. So let me at least try to pretend I'm paying you back. Me who messed up your leg and your future!”

“Hey you dumb bastard.To me, other than soccer, it was only you. When my future in soccer was ruined and I wanted to die, you should have at least been by my side you bastard. So what I'm saying is...didn't you miss me, you bastard?”

The scene faded away and a torrent of applause rose from the audience, deafening the studio. Cheers and whistles filtered through the clapping, and he accepted it all with a thankful nod and small smile.

“Waah...the bond between friends is touching indeed! What you have just seen was voted the best scene from School, and the scene that got Go Nam Soon this year's KBS Best New Actor Award. So tell us, Nam Soon-sshi, how are you feeling right now? How is it—what does it feel like to have...had this huge accomplishment?”

He tore his eyes away from the audience and refocused himself on the TV host before him. Having heard this question numerous times since last week, he wetted his lips and pretended to ponder the question briefly before answering. “Well...shocked, really. When we started shooting for School, it never once crossed my mind that I might have received that award. I had a lot of other things going through my mind, but getting Best New Actor was definitely not one of them. I don't think I deserve it,” he admitted with a small chuckle. This earned a round of 'aww's from the audience, and he flashed them a quick smile.

The TV host laughed and said, “Waah so humble, our Nam Soon-sshi. Then what did you think about? 'Ahh...when is going to be lunch break?' or 'Aigoo...I'm going to have to shoot a scene outside in the cold again?'”

Nam Soon laughed and scratched his head. “..more like, 'Ahh...If we have to film another class lecture scene, I'm really going to fall asleep'. And I did, a couple of times.”

“What a bad student you are, Nam Soon-sshi. Although, I heard you did have a tendency to do that during high school from your past teachers. Is that true?”

Nam Soon paled slightly as thoughts of high school surfaced, but quickly covered it up by wincing animatedly. “Yah...I've been caught. It was the best way to avoid trouble,” he professed candidly.

“Avoid trouble? Did you have trouble in school?”

A chorus of 'eh's welled up and murmurs spread across the room.

“Well...I did have to do some cigarette shuffling a couple of times...” He made a thoughtful face and waited patiently for the indignant response from his fans to simmer down, humored and touched by the concerns of his fans. “...but it wasn't anything as bad as what Lee Jae Shin had to go through in School,” he finished.

The show host nodded understandingly. “Not even Nam Soon-shi was spared bullying in high school? But this was precisely why School was made, wasn't it? To spread the awareness of bullying and problems of our school systems today. Now, a lot of our viewers were heavily invested in the tumultuous relationship between Lee Jae Shin and Kim Woo Hyun. How is that relationship like in real life? What is the friendship between you and...”

xxxx

Clunk!

He bent down and pushed open the vending machine flap to retrieve his can of Cola, popping it open and eagerly drinking in the ice-cold contents. Damn, he'd been thirsty. A sigh escaped him, and he took a moment to rest his forehead against the humming machine.

He let his eyes fall close for a few seconds before taking in a deep breath and pushing himself away. He downed the rest of the can and tossed it in a nearby bin before stuffing his hands in his pockets and turning around to head back.

He was still staring at the ground when a pair of shoes fringed upon his line of vision. Glancing up curiously, he let out a tired smile upon seeing who it was. “Ji Hoon-ah...what are you doing here?”

Ji Hoon grinned. “To cheer up a certain friend of mine, saekki-ya,” he scoffed while playfully punching Nam Soon's shoulder. “How'd the interview go?”

Nam Soon gave an exasperated sigh and stared upwards at the ceiling. “Same as the other twenty-hundred I did. Same questions, same responses...ahh...if I have to sit through another one of them, I think I'll fall asleep to my own words. Aish...my cheeks hurt from smiling,” he whined while clapping his cheeks with both of his hands. “You should have been there to suffer with me, you jerk. Kim Woo Hyun stuck it out with Lee Jae Shin. Why doesn't Lee Ji Hoon do the same for Go Nam Soon, hm.”

The other man responded with a a grunt of dismissal. “No thanks. I've had my fair share of interviews too. Can't say I've had as many individual ones as you did, but I'm good. Plus it was Jung Ho-ya's birthday today. Couldn't miss.”

Nam Soon blinked owlishly. “Oh, that's right. How is he? Why are you not getting drunk with him now?” Oh Jung Ho was an interesting individual whom Nam Soon had met a couple of times at Ji Hoon's apartment during their game nights. The guy looked like a high school delinquent, and acted like one sometimes too, but made some killer-ramen, and owned and operated quite the successful ramen shop in Gangbuk-gu. He and Ji Hoon had grown up together, although Nam Soon had a bit of trouble imagining that. A yawn escaped him and he sniffed lightly.

“Something came up, apparently. Something to do with the shop. I would have gone with him, but I would have just gotten in the way. And then I remembered that your interview finished around now. And that you'd probably have that dejected and pathetic look that you have now,” the shorter man said while shooting Nam Soon a pointed glance.

Nam Soon stared at his friend for two seconds before shrugging and starting to shuffle away. “I don't know what you're talking about.” A hand on his shoulder stops him from moving very far, however, and concerned eyes met his as Ji Hoon moved to stand in front of him.

“Every time. Every time they ask you about the drama. About your character. About how realistically you portrayed Lee Jae Shin's feelings...look, if you don't want to talk about it, you shouldn't have to, is all I'm saying. Stop taking these interviews.”

“But I do. You heard the management. Besides, I can't let down the—”

“—fans. Right, you can't let down the fans,” Ji Hoon finished the excuse he's heard time and time again with a near-automated nod. This was usually where the argument stopped. “Just...take it easy, alright? We don't need you angsting about and giving poor Kim Min Ki another scare. Honestly. He shouldn't have decided to manage actors if he was so prone to heart attacks,” he snorted, and smiled a bit when his joke managed to pull a grin out of the other.

The grin soon turned into a pout, however, and Nam Soon said, “But the drama is over. I can angst all I want now. Plus, angsting is what got me that award.” He cocked his head cutely and plastered the most innocent expression on his face.

Ji Hoon smacked his lips in annoyance and rolled his eyes. “This kid thinks he's so cute...” he grumbled while curling his lips distastefully at the other. “Fine! See if I care what you do with your spare time. Just stop looking like a beaten puppy after every interview. You're going to worry your precious fans.”

“Mmm...you're right. I won't. Now go back to Jung Ho's. I saw your phone light up like three times. He's probably waiting on you to drink.”

Ji Hoon raised an eyebrow in surprise. “Just like that? I'm right for once?”

Nam Soon responded with a deep and serious nod. “Like that.”

Ji Hoon looked suspicious but commented no further. “Yah...if you're not doing anything after this. You should join us.”

Nam Soon pondered the offer for a moment, but ended up shaking his head. “No thanks. I don't want to ruin your date.” He beamed innocently and bowed sarcastically. “Enjoy!” he said and walked away before Ji Hoon could respond.

It took a second to register what Nam Soon said, but when it did, Ji Hoon shut his hanging mouth and shouted after his co-star, “Yah!”

Nam Soon blatantly ignored the protest and walked away muttering loudly to himself, “Aigoo...what should I do now? Go home and make some ramen, read some manhwa...nice to have the day open for fun...” He stretched a bit for show, knowing the other was probably still staring at him with a gobsmacked expression.

Ji Hoon was about to call after the retreating figure again, but was interrupted by his cell phone's ringtone. “Aish...” he muttered, shaking his head while pulling out his phone. “Yea...you're where? Ah ok. I'll be there in a bit.”

xxxx

“Didn't we agree not to do this?”

“I couldn't do that.”

“Seriously. Does my leg get better if you do this?”

“Then what? I can't pretend it didn't happen. And I can't make it go away either.”

“So are you going to continue being this way?”

“I know I can't pay you back for what I've done. So let me at least try to pretend I'm paying you back. Me who messed up your leg and your future!”

“Hey you dumb bastard.To me, other than soccer, it was only you. When my future in soccer was ruined and I wanted to die, you should have at least been by my side you bastard. So what I'm saying is...didn't you—”

He shut the TV off.

He spread himself out across his couch and rubbed his eyes with the heels of his palm.

He hated it.

From the moment he and Ji Hoon started memorizing lines till the day they actually filmed the scene and every time that damn scene was shown...he could only hear one voice and see one face. It was a tunnel vision that threatened to eat him whole.

He glanced over at the closet, where he stuffed the Best New Actor Award the moment he got back from the after-party.

He didn't deserve it.

That award was for acting.

It wasn't acting when the feelings were real.

xxxxxx

“You understand the position you're in, don't you, Lee Seongsaeng-nim?”

“Please...please...you can't take her. Take me, please! It's my fault, not hers!” the man on the floor begged and pleaded, barely conscious enough to hold himself on all fours. “Please have a heart, please...I'm sorry...”

“Abeoji!” a girl screamed from the side, though she was being held back by two strong men.

Kang Jung Han clucked his tongue and exhaled loudly. “Aigoo...now you're just making us sound like bastards. But we're not bastards, are we, Hyung?” he asked, tossing the rhetorical question at the man standing off to the side, who'd been watching the entire proceedings without a single input.

“Please...please...” Desperate eyes now the bystander, who held a stone cold glare and neither responded nor moved.

“Shut the up, saekki-ya” Kang Jung Han sneered and kicked the man's stomach. “You think my Hyung will listen to your pathetic pleads?” He then leans down and pulls the man's ear up none-too-gently to whisper teasingly into his ear, “You should be thankful Hyung is doing nothing. If he did, you'd be dead, dumb bastard. See? You're the bastard here. Not us. We're just doing our jobs. And our job is to make sure we get our money back from thieving bastards like you.” He spat on the man and landed another punch in.

“Stop it! You're going to kill him, you bastards!”

Kang Jung Han stopped his fist mid-air. Slowly, he turned to face the girl. He stood up and stalked his way over, baring his teeth like a blood-thirsty wolf. “What did you say, ?”

The girl trembled, tears welling up in her eyes, but her gaze remained steady, unblinking.

Jung Han raised his fist, and the girl screamed and ducked instinctively.

“Enough,” a low voice cut through the tension. “The boss will have our heads if we're late.”

Jung Han stared at his Hyung for a second, silently challenging the authority of his command. “Tch,” he scoffed a second later and pushed his way out the door.

The man who spoke took in a deep breath and let it out slowly before pulling out a cigarette, lighting it and taking a drag of that. He turned to face the now-quietened girl. “Yah. What's your name?”

The girl must not have been expecting him to say anything and thus stared at him for a few moments with a slack expression before the question processed and her features snapped together and she muttered, “Lee Kang Joo.”

“Park Heung Soo.

“Why?”

Heung Soo just looked at her. “So you'll know the name of the person who ruined and changed your life.”