It's been a good one and a half year since I became the luckiest girl to fall on the face of planet Earth. One and a half year of  being with the most gorgeous and incredibly amazing gentleman, Kris Wu. I've never been happier, really. 

Ever since we got together, I've never felt happier in my entire life.

Everything seems to be going on the right track. That all this time, Kris' existence in my life has been that missing puzzle that I knew I've unconsciously longed for. and that our love, as long as we're together, has this superhuman capability of surpassing any struggles along the way.

Besides, I've always been a positive person and an understanding one too. But the thing is, this past few weeks, Kris seems too pre-occupied with a lot of things; things that apparently does not include me. 

Either that, or it's just that I rarely see him now. I'd be lucky if I get to spend time with him once in a week. And that's just it. I doubt he's having an affair though. It's definitely not like him. But then again, who am I to judge? Maybe I don't know him well enough yet. 

Or maybe am over-thinking already. Aish. I shouldn't be doing this. How can I even think badly about Kris? He has always been the type of guy I can always rely on, a guy who never thinks twice about his image if it'll make me feel better, a guy who exerts effort to make my grandma, the only family I have, smile, that one guy who thinks of his future with me in it. How can I even doubt him?

Ugh. I feel sick. I feel bad about myself, I wanted to punch my face. 

"Hey, you alright?" I jerked back in shock when Kris suddenly appeared at my side, holding unto my left shoulder. I must've looked like I've been disturbed from something important because the moment he saw my expression, he pulled his hand away. And when I saw his, I got more concerned. He looked terribly awful. Dark circles under his eyes, disheveled hair, tired and slumped shoulders. "Am supposed to be the one asking that. Come, let's sit."

I held his right arm and dragged him towards the cafeteria in hopes of making him feel better by buying his comfort food, hamburger.

"Seriously, what's gotten into you?" I asked him, gently caressing his exhausted face, trying to figure out how he's still handsome despite looking really wasted at the same time. He held my hand that's still intact on his face and snuggled closer to it, as if the warmth radiated from my hand soothes him. And I couldn't help but melt on the inside. 

"Really, what's gotten into you?" It took me a while to ask and stop staring at him. I needed to know what's wrong. 

It was obvious that he didn't know where to start and was probably weighing whether to still tell me or not, but the worry in my face told him otherwise. "I..." He paused midway and continued, "I am financially damned," he confessed, letting go of my hand and letting his head fall over the table, a pretty loud thud was audible.

For the first time in more than a year, I've seen him this devastated. And it never occurred to me that of all possible problems, he'd be having trouble concerning monetary matters. 

"I'll help. Am not sure if there's anything much that I'm capable of, but I promise to be of help. Just...just let me know..." I tried to console him and softly pat his head when he looked up at me and gave me an appreciative smile weakly. 

"You don't know how much your presence alone makes it all easier for me. I could never express in words how  grateful I am for having such an amazing girl. Despite getting nastier now, and it might sound really selfish but, I do hope you can continue showering me with your love. I've been such an lately, but I promise to make it up to you..." He looked straight into me, overflowing sincerity and disappointment of himself both present in his eyes. I gave him an approving nod and smiled. I love this guy. There's no way that I can leave him now, especially when he's having a hard time. He suddenly got up, strode towards me and hugged me, my head resting on his waist. "I'm so sorry for being not good enough."

"Who said that?" I playfully slapped his clothed tummy and looked up at him, pouting. 

"Oh, stop doing that when I'm this weak. My heart might not take it anymore," he joked back, and I knew right there that the Kris I've known was back to normal. At least for the time being.  

Another week passed and I haven't seen him since then. I was dead worried that I kept on fiddling with the strap on my phone, lying on my bed, when it rang and thanked almost all possible gods and deities after seeing the caller ID.

Me: KRIS! 

I didn't know how my voice turned out to him and was partly afraid he'd get mad for suddenly getting yelled at but he didn't. He sounded pretty calm actually, as if sensing that coming.

Kris: Hi babe. I called because I badly miss your voice. Tell me anything. Just let me hear your voice...

He pleaded and I honestly didn't know what to say. He's been keeping this burden from me for reasons that he wouldn't even tell me. I wanted to argue about it, to demand answers and reasons from him, but I just couldn't bring myself to ask him that. Not right now when he's all frustrated and hella tired.

Me: Oh, Kris...come over here and watch a movie with me. It'll get your mind off things for a while. I'll prepare snacks!

I tried to sound normal, jolly, and he might see through it, actually, but who cares? I just want to make things easier for him, if that's even possible. 

Kris: I would love to babe. It's just..

Me: It's fine. Just finish whatever it is that's keeping you from me. It may not look like it but, I really, really miss your everything...

I fought hard not to let my tears fall because despite talking on the phone, I know Kris would be able to tell whether  am crying already, or when am faking my emotions for his sake.

Kris: Sorry babe....be reminded though that I love you. I always do.

A week has passed again and still no sign of Kris. I wonder how long I'd be able to hold on to this kind of setup...

It's not so wrong to let me carry with him a burden sometimes, right? 

Without really thinking, I stopped in front of a small ramen stall and decided that there's not much to do so eating noodles doesn't seem like a bad idea before heading straight home. Classes ended a while ago and Kris didn't even showed up on two of our classes together so I assumed there's no reason for me to stay at the gates and wait for someone who's not coming. 

So instead of depressing myself back home, here I am, about to gobble down a bowl of ramen when a stranger suddenly draped his arm around my shoulder. I instinctively pushed him away making him lose his balance and  tripping over his own foot. Err....

I knew he'd come for me once he got up so I paid quickly and sadly left my uneaten ramen behind. Unfortunately, he too was quick enough to hold me back and prevent me from running away. 

He swung me around forcefully and glared at me, wanting to punch the living daylights out of me. Closing my eyes not wanting to witness this mishap is the only thing am capable of doing right now.  Until I heard a loud slap. Which didn't sound like it was coming from my face. It didn't hurt either. 

Having find the guts to open my eyes and see exactly what happened, what I found was the guy clutching unto his left cheek looking in pain and a girl wearing an apron beside him who might've done the pleasure of lending me a helping hand.

"Get out, you !" She howled, exerting much effort in pushing him outside the stall for misbehaving. After what seemed like forever, she turned to me and I seriously flinched in fright. Her stamina is no joke. 

All the fear I felt was turned upside down when she flashed me a proud grin. That's when I got a good look of her face and thought how utterly gorgeous she was. "T-thank you," I mumbled lamely. 

I gulped and continued, "You lost a customer because of me."

There were only three customers including me and the guy earlier. Now it was down to just two. I suddenly felt sorry for her. It must've been tough handling this stall alone, and not getting a number of decent customers.

"Nah, bastards like him doesn't deserve to eat my ramen!" She stated smugly despite the stress moments like these could offer. 

She ushered me back to my seat and I proceeded eating when an idea popped out from my very helpful brain.

"I got it! I'll help you with these umma~!" I half-yelled, unintentionally disturbing the man eating next to me so I bowed respectfully and went near the beautiful ramen-stall owner.

"Umma? You meant, unnie?" She started laughing while I got smaller in embarrassment.

"Sorry, sorry~ I've always thought you were Korean," she explained in between giggles.

I felt my cheeks reddening, getting redder than that of a tomato, if that's even possible. "I am. I was just raised in California. Anyway, my Korean is getting better. Just got some honorifics all mixed up."

"Ooohh.. I see. What kind of help are you even referring to?"

"I heard that a 9 member girl group is really popular here. I remember this one song that's really eye-catchy..."

She was starting to get confused, not knowing where the conversation is probably heading. 

"What am saying is...we can dance it and attract more customers!" I suggested despite sensing how stupid it literally sounded.

"Oh, by the way, my name's Nathalie~" I introduced, before I forgot, and bowed respectfully. She looked at me as if recalling something and dismissed it quickly, returning my bow. "Gyuri here! Your idea sure sounds crazy but that's exactly what'll attract people! You sure you wanna do this?" I nodded and received an energized smile from her.

For only half an hour of singing and dancing to, SNSD's, as Gyuri unnie said, Gee,  we sure did earned enough customers to fill the stall. Jumping in happiness, I helped out in the tiny kitchen-like area while Gyuri unnie was singing lively as she cooks the ramen.

After hours of nonstop cooking, now it's time to clean the stall. "Hey, you've been of great help today so you may go home already. I can't trouble you with cleaning after all that you've done for me. I'll be fine. And do anticipate unlimited ramen from me tomorrow!" My eyes lit up in delight and she caught sight of it, laughing. 

"But we couldn't have gotten that many of customers if it weren't for your beauty, unnie. See how most of our customers are men?" Another round of laughter. 

"Oh, come on. You're not so bad yourself too!" 

"Who is she?" A kid's voice asked from behind, grabbing my full attention after speaking in straight English. After seeing him, I kind of got why though. His looks are perfectly the same as American kids! Don't tell me he's a customer too. It's weird that a foreign-looking kid would be strolling around this unfamous city and at this unholy hour of the day!

But then again, I must treat him well. Who knows, he might have a lot of dollars in his pocket. "Hello there~ I'm Nathalie, you are?" I spoke with such pride, getting the reaction from him that I wanted. Shock. 

"She got you, buddy. Raised in California yo!" Gyuri unnie said, teasing the foreign-looking guy. Ooohh, so they know each other....

Did she just talk to him in Korean?!

Unnie gave him one of her eco bags and he hesitantly got it, slinging it over his shoulder. "Psh," was all he could utter back. I am getting a little puzzled here.

"The girl got 'ya there," Another young man emerged from outside, laughing, much to the foreign kid's dismay.

"Mind telling me who you two are?" Why do handsome guys keep on popping out? It sounds funny but I seriously felt out of place among these good-looking people. 

The foreign one refused to talk and the other didn't seem to give a damn. Childish, are we?

Seeing that nothing's going to happen anytime soon, Gyuri did the honor of introducing both guys. "This ignorant little brat is Hansol. That flower boy on the other hand, is Myungsoo. They're my step brothers."

I nodded, not knowing what to say next. "She thinks we're weird now," Hansol assumed, snickering.

Oohhh...I get it. They were afraid I'd act indifferently just because they're step siblings and stuff.

"No. If you'd honestly ask me what am thinking right now, I'd say that I'm quite amused."

"Now, you are weird," the Myungsoo guy commented, staring at me as if I'm not from the same planet as his. 

"Stop it, you two! She's the reason why the stall was literally full earlier! Thank her! It's all because of her that you two will be having enough money to buy lunch tomorrow!" Were they not eating lunch daily? I shivered at the thought. I couldn't do that. 

"You should come and have dinner with us!" Gyuri suggested, holding both my arms. 

The Myungsoo guy didn't seem to be in favor with her idea, and either did Hansol. "I would love to but..."

"Who would want to eat dinner in our barracks?" Hansol commented, obviously in total disagreement with me sharing a dinner with them, thinking that I'd only be criticizing their home. 

"Look Hansol, I sincerely wanted to enjoy dinner with you all, regardless of what your home looks like, or how unappealing your personality is," I blurted out, unable to contain my emotions. Seeing his astounded expression looks pretty funny though. "I like her. Come on, let's eat dinner. Am starving," Myungsoo said, approving my presence and walking on his way. Aigooo~ What an adorable guy~

It was a good 15 minute walk from the stall until we reached their house. It wasn't as shabby as the guys made it look like in my head. It looks fairly well for people who confessed about the lack of pocket money for their lunch.

Nothing looks utterly poor and out of the norm too.

Not until the wooden gate is opened, displaying an unconscious Kris lying on the cemented floor, leaving me totally dumbfounded. All of my companions rushed to his side and it took me a few more seconds before I can finally registered what had happened. I rushed to his side as well, panicking, with no idea of what to do first. How can this be happening? What's he doing here? And why the hell is he drenched in his own sweat, unfortunately having a high fever as well..?!

Gyuri carried his upper torso and rested it on her lap while I continued having a mini heart attack. "Yifan...what happened to you?" She asked, probably as dead worried as me. Myungsoo suggested that we bring him inside and I agreed quickly because I was either too worried or jealous of the scene. Or both. 

After carefully laying him on an old mattress taken from someone's room, everyone stayed silent and watched Kris sleeping. Minutes later and Hansol started firing me questions. "You know hyung?", "Why do you look so freaking worried?", "What's your business with him?"

I didn't know what held me back from saying that 'his hyung' is apparently my boyfriend. It probably didn't feel right to be saying things like that at this point. But I do admit that I kind of felt bad when it dawned on me that I haven't met these guys before, however they were closely related to Kris, or even have the chance to visit his house, and we're like together for more than a year now. I mean, was he embarrassed of me?

"I..uhhh..I'm his classmate," I uttered nervously, trying to convince them with my pathetic acting and succeeded anyway. "We've been groupmates for quite a long time so I guess we've been used with each other's presence; yes, that kind of relationship..."

Gyuri unnie studied my face and disregarded whatever it is that she has concluded. I remained silent until she finished putting a cold compress on Kris' forehead. Honestly, I don't think eating dinner was the best idea right now and I am fully aware that I should be going home instead of sitting here being useless, but I guess I just couldn't bring myself to leave Kris here with zero idea how he's even related with these people.

"He's my step brother too."

Excuse me? My eyes went overly huge and rounded that no word is necessary for them to understand how shocked I am by the sudden revelation. Is this some kind of an orphan? Why does Gyuri unnie have lots of step brothers????

Myungsoo suddenly left the living room, a hint of bitterness present in his eyes, while Hansol obviously hung his head low, and Gyuri continued on with the explanation. "You see, our mom was a e,"

Now, I am beyond shocked. There's no way of explaining what am feeling right now. Don't get me wrong though, am not disgusted by that fact. Nor am glad about it. It's not a neutral feeling either.

After one lengthy explanation of how things turned out badly for them, their mom, and well, several dads, I couldn't quite take in any more unbelievable information so I had to excuse myself as politely as possible, so as not to create an awful misunderstanding, and thanked them for the hospitality as I made my way to the gate. 

I gave Hansol a genuine smile and asked him to say goodbye to Myungsoo for me, and to my surprise, he nodded, although quite mournfully. 

Before I got outside completely, Gyuri held my arm and gave me an apologetic look. "Don't get Kris wrong. Am sure he's not planning on hiding us for long. It's just that we've had trouble with our financial means and he probably didn't want to get you involved as this might only distract you too from other things more important. Please don't hate him. He's been doing all sorts of part time jobs to sustain us all. I told him not to worry about it anymore and let me handle things, since am the eldest among us, but he kept on saying that I didn't have to go through all these and just trust him..." She said, all in one go, close to sobbing.

I hugged her tightly and wondered why she's telling me all this. "I won't hate him. I can't, even if I tried," I said and laughed about it, earning a smile from Gyuri unnie as well. "Why are you telling me all this, unnie?"

"For one, I had to defend my brother from her unsuspectingly, kind girlfriend," she said and winked at me.

She knew? "How'd you-?"

"Women's insticts, I guess?" 

Another week has passed. Weeks have been passing way too quickly, you know? Now that I know exactly what's going on with Kris, there's no reason for me to get overly worried. Although, I do worry about his family's condition, at least I have the basic knowledge of what he's been doing. Am not even jealous or anything. I just hope he's doing fine always. 

I just got outside the school premises when I was greeted by a very jumpy Gyuri. "Unnie~~!"

"Come with me! Hurry!" She said, running and dragging me with her. And when I was busy figuring out what's going on, she came to a stop, both of us panting. 

Pointing forward, what I saw are Myungsoo and Hansol both holding opened umbrellas. It was only when I stepped closer that I've read something written on the outside portion. 

On Myungsoo's it said, 'Babe, let me apologize for, again, being an , and spending more time with various jobs than you. I heard you helped out with the stall, regardless of my sister's anonymity. Your gentle heart is what I love the most.'

On the other hand, on Hansol's umbrella, 'You make me so proud babe. Now, let me make it up to you, as promised.'

I was reading the whole thing out loud and blushing in the process when the two of them stepped on opposite sides revealing Kris in all his handsome glory. My hands automatically went near my face, covering my mouth in pure delight. I had to spare my dignity and prevent myself from shrieking wildly in front of these two brats here. 

All I wanted to do was to rush to him, hug him tightly and never let go. The thing is, I can't quite move my disobedient feet. It was all part of his plan though. After flashing me one of his to-die-for- grins, he got something from his back pocket that surprised me more. A fake mic.

I'm sure he's aware that if he starts singing right then and there, I'm afraid my heart wouldn't be able to hold on to dear life for long.

He sang anyway. 

I'll be your dream, I'll be your wish, I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope, I'll be your love, be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath, truly madly deeply do..

I will be strong, I will be faithful 'cause I'm counting on A new beginning.

A reason for living. A deeper meaning.

I want to stand with you on a mountain.
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever.
Until the sky falls down on me

And when the stars are shining brightly in the velvet sky,
I'll make a wish send it to heaven then make you want to cry
The tears of joy for all the pleasure and the certainty.
That we're surrounded by the comfort and protection of
The highest power. In lonely hours. The tears devour you
I want to stand with you on a mountain,
I want to bathe with you in the sea.
I want to lay like this forever,
Until the sky falls down on me

Oh can you see it baby?
You don't have to close your eyes 'cause it's standing right before you.
All that you need will surely come

I'll be your dream, I'll be your wish, I'll be your fantasy.
I'll be your hope, I'll be your love, be everything that you need.
I love you more with every breath, truly madly deeply do..

He sang the last lines while scooting closer to me as I melted away. Finally, my head rested on the crook of his neck, inhaling his manly and addicting scent. "I missed you ," I blurted out, hugging him tightly.

"I know, babe. I missed you too. You make this so proud though..."

We stayed like that for who knows how long when he pulled my tiny body slightly away from his, "Babe...You know how some says that you only fall in love once?"

I nodded, trying to get back to his warm body. He chuckled and ruffled my hair, cupping my face and looking straight at me. "But every time I look at you, I just couldn't help but wonder how you make me fall harder each time. You never fail to make my heart flutter nervously every freaking moment, babe."

I smiled smugly, having mini spazzes on the inside. "Oh, no. Don't start with me Kris Wu...."

"That's my girl~" he said grinning, kissing my forehead for a good minute. And then hugging me so tight I thought our bodies would literally fused with one another as he whispered, "I love you more with every breath, truly madly deeply do.."

It's been a good one and a half year since I became the luckiest girl to fall on the face of planet Earth. One and a half year of  being with the most gorgeous and incredibly amazing gentleman, Kris Wu. I've never been happier, really. 

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