It had started when he was at the young tender age of 5, that's when he first laid eyes on the beautiful chubby little boy. He remembers the day so clearly. He was star struck, never having laid eyes on such unique natural beauty. Even at such an age he knew he wanted him, although It was just infatuation at first. It was the other kid's first day of school. He remembers his teacher telling him
"jonghyun, I think you will be the one to take care of the new kid"
With that the said child grinned gleefully at the new kid.

For the first few months after their first meeting things went smoothly between the two. They spent their every waking moment together. At each other's houses,during school even at parks after school. Like every other set of best friends. However all good things must come to an end, and for these two boys it came too soon.

Jonghyun's POV
I remember it as clear as day. I came in a little late as my mum woke up late. I was scared he would be angry because we didn't walk to school together. I was so excited to see him because my mum bought us some chocolates to share but when I got to the class room, there was a sight I wished I could never see again. There he was just sat there happily smiling, and chatting away to this other pretty girl. I thought nothing of this just him having another friend until, That girl placed her slobbery wet lips upon his gorgeous bow shaped ones. Even at the age of 5 I knew a kissed is shared between people who love each other very much. And he was supposed to share his with ME! Out of anger I stormed of there and punched him.
"What are you doing!?" I screamed at him.
"What does it look like, Jjong!? I'm kissing my girlfriend" he retorted.
With that I saw red, I screamed again and tackled him to the ground. And without thinking I spat out
" Who would want to kiss someone as ugly as you! Fugly fatty"
With this he was shocked. That shocked face turn to one of sadness, his eyes threatening to leak tears.
"J-Jjong.. What are you saying..?" He barley managed to whisper.
"You don't even deserve to call me that ugly. We're no longer friends KIBUM!"
With that I grabbed the unknown girl's hand and stormed out of the class room, leaving a crying Kibum behind.
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No POV
As time passed jonghyun let his jealousy control his actions more and more. He even began bullying key, just to gain his attention. As he got older jonghyun regretted what he had done in the past but he knew if he couldn't gain Kibum's love he would at least want him to remember him, even if Kibum hated him for his whole life. So he continued thinking that Kibum would just live through this, not that it was affecting him at all. How wrong he was.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

It was on a Thursday , just a normal school day. Jonghyun was sat at his desk, daydreaming about our gorgeous Kibum. Nothing abnormal, at all. Until their tutor came in looking devastated. Jonghyun paid him no mind though.
"Students, I hate to be the barer of grave news but one of our students last night has attempted to take their own life. Our own Kim Kibum "
At this jonghyun'a head shot up. Shock was evident in his eyes.
'Wait what!? This must be a joke! He had no reason to kill himself!'
"Haha, the fat deserved it!" Said one of his classmates.
"I agree, he was not liked by anyone because he is so ugly!"
With this everyone, except jonghyun and the teacher, erupted into a roar of laughter.
Silently and unnoticed, the teacher made his way over to jonghyun.
"He wrote this to you.." The teacher passed an envelope.
Jonghyuns hands were shaking so much, tears streaming down in face. The letter read as so:

Hey jonghyun or as I used to call you Jjong
To be honest I don't really understand why you became so angry after that kiss all those years ago. But I missed you after that.
You never spoke to me just scowled. Except from the times you and your friends would come and shout insults and throw punches.
Just to clear things up, if you're curious on that day with that girl, I guess you wanna' know why I kissed her...
I found out she wanted to date you, and I wanted you to my self. Haha, how selfish do I sound. I didn't want you to look at anyone but me. That plan backfired. I wanted my first kiss to be with you. I guess that'll never happen. How could I be so daft to ever think that?
It was quite obvious you never felt the same. You made that quite clear. I guess you liked that girl all those years ago, that seems the only logical reason for you getting angry.
Then you started that thing with your friends, the bullying. You know what I thought I could survive it, knowing you at least thought of me.
You know what, congratulations. After all these years you have finally broken me. So much I can't even bare to live on. Strangely enough I loved you, even after what you did to me, I'll probably always love you, But It's over now.
You win..

Jonghyun felt queasy.Everything jonghyun had done in the past 10 odd years all came back to him. And he realised the extent of what he had done. How wrong he had been, overestimating key, believing that his little 'teasing' would not affect him. His thoughts were drowned out by the cruel laughter emitting from his class mates.
What had he done!? He had technically taken a life, the boy he loved's life. Even if Kibum was still alive, even as kind as he is he'll never forgive jonghyun, for what he has done. Never in a million years would jonghyun ever get a chance a kibummie again. Like he had a chance in the first place. Now since Kibum is dead.
That word, that dreaded word. One which will haunt him forever reminding him every single day that the one he loves is dead, and by his own hands.
His kibummie is lost, Lost in this unforgiving world.
But don't worry Kibum, it's you who has won. I will follow you into the abyss. Then maybe you'll forgive me for my wrong doings, and our corrupted souls will finally find rest, in the embrace of each other and

Death.

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Yeah.. Its short.. and crap. But i thought i would share it with you guys.

I know i haven't update my other fic(Here --> http://www.asianfanfics.com/story/view/362129/protector-jonghyun-jongkey-key-romance-shinee-vampire ) But i had this in my head while i was ill.

Please no hate, even though there would probably be LOADS of mistakes

Oh well ╮(─▽─)╭

Thanks for reading

-DangerMousee