Sheet 14

“Idol Park Yoochun Found.” I said out loud to myself while reading today’s newspaper.

                My heart began beating hard. This article could contain a lot of things. They could also be joking or they could really know where Yoochun lives. So without any hesitation I took the newspaper ignored on a bench and paced off. I gradually walked away reading everything keenly, while I am on my way to work.

Part of the short article says:

Singer, Songwriter Park Yoochun is finally located after a few long months of the social media tracking his whereabouts. Yoochun is staying at an isolated place in Seoul. He was seen wandering about a certain area having a chat with the residents, yet no one is definite where his exact abode is…

             Alongside the paragraphs were stolen pictures of the star. Surprisingly there was one image with me in it. I squinted my eyes to get a better look. Wa-wait a second… this picture was taken a long time ago, that day when we were chased by those fan girls. News traveled slowly, I wonder who wrote this. The author was not included here… it might be a fan? A Sasaeng probably? Although is that even possible that a random fan would write for a paper? Just in case the writer here is a fan? Never mind.

           Now that this is out, I should be expecting for the worse right? I should prepare myself for what’s to come. I already have a gut-wrenching feeling it won’t look pretty at all. In my perspective that is… I-I can’t make myself believe this is all happening. I haven’t gotten to know the-once-damned-star so much. I still wish I could with the short span of time I think I still have. However with Minkyung coming in the picture, I don’t think it will come true.

            The future is all but a blur to me. One thing is for sure though, after he leaves… everything will go back to the way it was. I wouldn’t be looking forward to seeing him every day. I’ll never feel so excited to come up to the rooftop and find him there. I will be passing by a vacated unit inside the apartment house as well, once he is gone.

I felt my phone vibrating inside my bag and fetched it immediately, “Yobasaeyo?”

“Lee Minah?” an unknown person from the other line reassured.

“Ah, yes this is Lee Minah, may I know who Is calling?” I replied, maintaining my pace.

“It’s me Kim Junsu. Yoochun’s friend, we met back at a hospital in Jeju.” He re-introduced himself.

“Oh yes, Junsu… Kim Junsu. It is nice to hear from you again.” I instinctively smiled because of his cheerful tone as I tried to remember who he was from the four.  

I heeded him chuckle a bit and continued, “Yeah likewise… Anyway are you free right now?”

“I am sorry Junsu. I am not free right now. I am actually on my way to work.” I responded with my eyebrows crossed and my lips slightly pouted.

“Chincha? Then I guess I’ll just come to you. Where do you work?” he asked so casually.

        I told him where I work and its exact location. Afterwards he questioned what time we close and I said we close at dusk. Junsu then made an arrangement that he’ll meet me at the music store after my work. I queried why he wanted to meet and just stated that it was a secret and suddenly bid good-bye. I wonder what he’s up to.   

“Good morning.” I passively greeted Hyekyo upon entering the store.

“Yah, you’re late.” She lightly scolded me, as she pointed at the clock.

         My eyes followed her finger. Whoa, I did not know I was that late. Have I been walking that slowly? I turned to her, “I am sorry. I was not aware of the time.” and bowed my head as a sign of my apology. I then proceeded at the back room to put my things down.

“Hey, is there something bothering you?” my best friend suddenly questioned me as she rested her right shoulder on the door frame.

I chuckled, “What are you saying?”

“You don’t seem to be yourself lately. I am just worried.” She released a heavy sough afterwards.

I spun around and beamed at her, “I am fine Hyekyo. Really…”

“Minah… If it is about Yoochun… you can tell me whatever it is.” Hyekyo gradually walked to me.

“I am serious Hyekyo. I am perfectly fine.” I kept lying.

She placed her warm concerned hand on my cold shoulder, “Minah.”

     My gal friend looked at me straight in my eyes. She pinched my cheeks a few times and then stated, “I know you like Yoochun that much, but you have to let him go if he’s happy with Minkyung.”

“What?! Yoochun? I like Yoochun? Pfft. No, I don’t like him. No way, that’s crazy talk.” I attempted to deny it but I was not able to do it so smoothly like I thought I would.

“I know you Minah… and I know if you like someone.” Hyekyo calmly responded caressing my hair.

I cautiously glanced at her, “Do I look too obvious?”

“You know the answer to your question.” She raised an eyebrow and pushed my forehead with her index finger.

“Ouch.” I reacted with subtlety.

“Haven’t you told him about your feelings yet?” My best friend wondered as we strolled back out front.

“Of course I haven’t. I don’t think he needs to know…right?” I am not making sense as of this moment.

“Wouldn’t it better if you confessed to him? At least you won’t be ‘carrying’ so much weight on your shoulders. It’s up to him if accepts your feelings or not.” Hyekyo attempted to shed some light on my situation.

“Well, I think it is too late to tell him anyway. He is with Minkyung now.” I blurted oozing with negativity.

“Aish.” My friend casually pinched both my cheeks and pursued, “Then you should have done it earlier Lee Minah.”

I don’t know why I did not do that earlier before all this happened. Maybe I wasn’t sure that time? I wasn’t expecting it to be this deep either. Oh, this is very frustrating. What should I do?

“You think I should have told him?” I asked naively.

She soughed with so much frustration, “Minah of course! I believe things wouldn’t be this way if you did not deny that you like Yoochun. You wouldn’t feel this bad.”

I hung my head low, “He is meant to be with Minkyung.”

“Aigoo~! Lee Minah! Stop making Minkyung as an excuse.” Hyekyo folded her arms and continued, “Tell me honestly, does Minkyung deserve Yoochun?”

“I don’t think so.” My voice was soft.

“Then maybe you should confess to that guy and maybe, just maybe, he might forget her.” She kept on lecturing me.

“I-I am no-not re-ready…” I can’t help but stutter.

“Then when will you ever be ready? Next year? Five years from now? Don’t be stubborn Minah. If you wait a little longer you might never see him again and regret not telling him the truth.” She began sounding so naggy about it.

Any way I look at it, she has a point. But this whole liking him thing wasn’t even part of my plan. It’s not within the imaginary list I did for Project Yoochun.

“Hey Minah, are you even listening to me?” Hyekyo called my wandering attention.

“Y-yeah.”

She sighed intensely, “Just think about it okay? Maybe you’ll find the courage to confess to him… I sure hope it would be sooner than later.”

 ~•~•~•~•~

“That’s why you never saw us with him. He does not want us to be anywhere, near him.” Junsu ended.

Junsu came over a little after closing time. We invited him inside so the both of us could talk privately meanwhile Hyekyo just stayed out front watching T.V.

He narrated how they attempted to help the damned star get over the break-up. Yet, the star himself pushed his friends away. The four of them saw his great stubbornness and were left clueless on what else to do, to help him. They tried everything; a vacation to somewhere far, far away; soul-searching in a retreat house in the Philippines. They also consulted a psychologist, a therapist and all the doctors that could possibly help him. But Park Yoochun just didn’t want to be changed nor touched. Although they check up on him through his mobile phone from time to time but that’s it. It was always the same conversation. A “how are you?” is asked, and a “don’t worry about me,” simply ends it.    

Why is he telling me all this? Well, it seemed that news broke out that Yoochun is seeing Minkyung again and so, they were all afraid he will turn into his crummy old self. Junsu is asking for my help in behalf of Jaejoong, Changmin, and Yunho.

“I see… Well, I am not sure if I can effectively keep him away from her when she is the one who keeps on clinging unto him.” I stated after a long pause.

“If you were able to at least change him a bit, I am sure you can stop him from ruining his life again.” The friend smiled and placed his hand on my shoulder, “We believe in you.” He added.

…but I don’t believe in myself.

~•~•~•~•~

“Minah, just don’t forget to smile once in a while… alright?” Hyekyo pursued, “I don’t want you forming any wrinkles.” and then hugged me tight.

“Thank you Hyekyo. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I bid good-bye and turned my back on her.

I slowly walked down the stairs, my eyes glued on the ground. I kept playing with my hands as I paced away. My breathing is very solemn yet desperate. I then, carefully glanced up and plastered a fake grin on my face.    

A few blocks from home my phone started ringing. I hurriedly fetched it out from my bag, “Yobasaeyo?”

“Minah! Come to the park right now!” my friend exclaimed through the gadget but it felt like she was just right beside me.

“What?! Why?”

“It’s an emergency hurry!” and she hang up.

I stared at my phone for a moment trying to absorb what I just heard. It took me long before I came running towards the park.

I arrive in a few and find no one there who seems to be in need of help. I can’t even see anyone I know. Something is going on here.  I scan the surroundings the last time and still no one. Giving up, I sat down on a nearby bench to rest.

Feeling fooled, I spring up a few minutes after, and make my way back home. I called Hyekyo but I she’s not answering, believe she turned off her phone. Aigoo.

A running Yoochun greeted me as I walked out the park. I simply stared at him while he stopped in front of me and tried to catch his breath.

My eyebrows met upon hearing his question, “Are you hurt?”

I did not utter a word, as I continued trying to put the pieces together. What is really happening here?

“Hey…” he called my attention.

“Did by any chance Hyekyo send you here?” I blurted.

The star scratched his head, “Yeah. She said you got hurt…” he pursued, “Now that I think about it, she was not even able to say how you got hurt. I-I just immediately hung up and came rushing here.”

“However, I see you are perfectly fine.” He ended with a laugh.

As he talked, I just watched him, thinking how I could have liked him or when I might have started liking him. I still can’t figure it out.

“Did you see a ghost or something?” Yoochun tried to call my attention.

“No. No. Sorry.” I hung my head low.

“Were you about to leave?” he suddenly questioned, as if he wants to keep the conversation going.

I sheepishly nodded as an answer, “Would you mind sitting with me on that bench for a while?” he suggested, using such a polite tone.

“No, I don’t mind.” I looked up and smiled.

We both sat down quietly on the bench. Surprisingly we glanced at each other at the same time. He looked like he was about to say something to me, but he just couldn’t quite get the right timing. I on the other hand, simply wanted to catch another glimpse of him. As if we were in sync, Yoochun and I gazed away the second our eyes met.

The star soon broke the ice a few awkward moments later, “Hyekyo set us up.” He chuckled.

“Yes, she definitely did.” I agreed, “I wonder why though...” I muttered but he managed to hear and gave a reply, “I think she just wants us to talk.”

“Talk about what?”

"So, were you on your way home?" he changed the topic instantly.

I meekly bobbed my head. Yoochun then, began sharing random stories I never heard of, like how he cries so easily on stage when he gets emotional with the fans. Or when the fans printed out a derp picture of him and flashed it during one of his concerts.  It were stories coming out of nowhere that it came to a point I wasn’t listening anymore because I was so confused of the way he is acting.

“There was this one time, Minkyung and I--” the star halted.   

“You and Minkyung did what?” I tried to continue in his behalf.

“It’s n-nothing.” He ended.

“I’m really okay with it if you want to talk about her. So go ahead.” I encouraged.

“I don’t think I should.”

I took in a deep breath to say, “I-I don’t think you should get back with Minkyung.” There finally, I said it!

I did not wish to see his reaction so I kept my eyes away from him. As expected he was speechless. It was really sudden and for sure he won’t be able to reply to that instantly.

I patiently waited for at least one word to come out of his lips. It took him a while before saying softly, “Why do you think so?”

I stated that it wouldn’t be such a great idea. I know she promised to be a better partner but seeing how vulnerable he still is, this is not the right time to be in a relationship again. Also, I’m pretty sure it will be difficult for him to forget all the pain. I mean his whole life almost crashed because of a woman, his experiences might be close to something traumatic.  Well, I said that’s how I see it.

He did not utter a word after my advice, which scared me of course. I need to know what he is thinking. He wanted to know what I thought about him getting back with Minkyung and I told it.

“Thank you.” Yoochun blurted.

My eyebrows met, “What?”

“Thank you. I guess I needed that imaginary, light slap on my face.” The star muttered as his eyes were firmly staring at his shoes.

 The star glanced at me, “At least I can be sane now. I was waiting for your thoughts about Minkyung all this time. Thank you.”

“You are very much welcome.” I released an awkward sigh afterwards.

I got that out of my chest after days of agony of not knowing how and when to tell that to him. I’m just hoping now that somehow he will follow my advice.

I suddenly heard Yoochun sneeze. I instantly took out my handkerchief and stated, “I think we should get home before it gets too dark out here.”

So it took us quite a while to get back, I don’t know if we were walking just really slow or we just shared so many random stories on the way home that it seemed like we were conversing for about an hour. However, we were rudely interrupted when groups of people with huge cameras came rushing to us as they were calling out Yoochun’s name. Aigoo, he wasn’t wearing a disguise, but really how did they know it was him when they came from a block away?

We were in the mob of indecently shouting media personnel’s and I had no idea what to do. They kept asking the star spontaneous questions but all that Yoochun did was hold my hand and shove them away. A few minutes of struggling after, he abruptly pushed me out of the crowd and signaled for me to leave him. The paparazzi however, still bombarded him with intolerable flashes and questions. I could barely see him as he was surrounded.

W-what is happening? Is this the situation that I did not want to come, happening before my eyes? Is this the end?  

~•~•~•~•~

Author's Note
 

I know, I know. I did not update fast like I said I would. I probably lost a lot of readers but I am thanking those now who are currently reading this note and still continues to read this story. Clearly I haven't really disclosed that I am a graduating university student as of the moment and the last two semesters left are very crucial so yeah I barely have the time to update. Although I felt bad for making you guys wait so long so I forced myself to update this fic. My sincerest apologies for making you wait long. I even lost an upvote haha. As I could remember I had 2 upvotes but when I came back to update only 1 was left. It really is saddening to see that. It's been 3 years and I haven't really finished this short story. It's frustrating for me too. So again sorry to my dear readers. I am also quite anxious I am no longer living up to what you guys expect of this story. Anyway, enough of the seriousness.

I would just like to show my appreciation for those still supporting this fan fiction. Thank you again. My deepest gratitude and well I hope to hear from you to at least let me know what you think of the story so far.