His breathing is getting shallow; he's sweating, and shaking at night. I can't sleep, I have to make sure he doesn't stop breathing... I'm scared he will. I stare at him; watch him sleep. I feel like laying down and hugging him ,but I'm stuck watching from a chair next to his bed.

 

    He's getting worst... I can't take it anymore, I have to be strong. I won't leave him alone, even when he tells me to leave. He's gotten so thin and pale. There's barely any light left in his eyes. I pray every night, "God, save him."

 

   The doctor says he'll need open heart surgery. He has difficulty breathing and his heart is giving out. I wish I could give him my breathing; mostly I wish I could give him my heart. I love him... He can't know.

 

    He's getting the surgery in a week. Oh God help him, please! He's the only person I have left. He's so fragile... Yet, he always smiles.

 

   I told him I loved him! He told me that I couldn't. To find someone that's not dying. I said I didn't care, I'll alway love him. I cried. Why can't he love me back?

 

  I still take care of him,  but, he doesn't look me in the eye. I still feed him, clean his house, and help him with everything I can. It gives me a big pain in my heart, seeing him like this. The days go by and I keep hope. 

 

   I'm so excited! Finally, he told me he loves me. He said, he always has. I'm so thankful that he finally told me! We can be together when he gets better. The night he told me, I laid in bed by him. Even though we weren't intimate, it was magical.

 

   Today he's having the surgery,  I can tell he's nervous. I'm nervous too, I have to be strong though. Strong for the both of us. The doctors are prepping him. He looks so angelic, he's my angel. 

 

   I'm so happy! The doctor said the surgery went well, however, only time will tell. He's slowly waking up, I caress his hair. I smiled and he smiles back. I slowly lean down and peck him on the lips. Finally, we can start over.

 

 I don't know what to do! His body is not responding to the surgery. His health is declining. Oh, God help him! He's shaking again, he's breathing is shallower. What should I do?

 

  The doctor says there's nothing he can do. There's not much time left. I'm bringing him home today and making him comfortable. We've decided not to talk about it and enjoy each other's company.

 

  He's getting weaker everyday. I cry in the bathroom, I put loud music so he won't hear me. God, please help! I want him to stay with me.

 

  I took him to the park today. People stared at the machines attached to his wheelchair; however, he looks perfect to me. We laughed and talked about anything and everything. I want this moment to never end.

 

  I don't think he's going to make it through the night. He's really ill... He's even saying his goodbyes, I hold him and comfort him. I want to cry. But, I know he's going to heaven. I'll see him there. I love him...

 

   It's been a week and surviving has been hard. I miss him more than my heart can bare. At least he's not suffering anymore. I'm moving away. I need a new start... I cry every night, hopefully, eventually it will stop. I look up at the stars and it reminds me of how much he use to shine. I whisper. "I love you." I feel like he can hear me.

 

   You're a real star now. God took you to a better place...

 

        THE END