*ALICE’S POV*

I am never gonna drink again. Alcohol is my enemy now. Those were the things that I first thought about when I woke up. Mind you, I haven’t even opened my eyes, but yes, I was aware that I had woken up because the blinding headache told me I had. my life, this headache would last for the whole day, I just knew it. I knew I drank enough last night to cause that. Okay, I need to get a Tylenol, or an Advil, or even a hammer if those two things weren’t available, just… anything to prevent me from wanting to switch my head with someone else’s. I slowly opened my eyes and realized that I was back in my room again, which begged for a question, how the hell did I get here? I mean, the last thing I remember was that in hilarious dance Kyuhyun was doing in the club and then… nothing. I looked down and saw a familiar arm draped over my stomach above the covers, and then I turned my head to the right and saw Hyukkie still sleeping and lying on his chest. The only thing that bothered me was that… why was he shirtless? He was never shirtless when he slept, I remembered he told me that he always felt cold when he had to sleep shirtless no matter how hot the weather was. I mean, I should know about this since he’d been sleeping in my room with me since we started dating, so… why? And then something that was placed on the small sofa in the corner of the room freaked the out of me.

There it was, my dress, the dress that I remembered vividly I had worn last night during the award show and the after party, laid carefully on the couch. And I DID NOT remember taking it off. What in god’s name happened last night?? I quickly peeked inside the covers and saw that… I was wearing nothing but Hyukkie’s black Adidas hoodie that I had the knack of wearing this past few weeks, and I could feel that underneath the hoodie… I was only wearing my . That’s when I knew I was entitled to freak out. I jumped off the bed, not at all giving a about the headache I was complaining about the first second I was awake. This here was something of greater importance. I felt chills of horror creeping on me as I looked around the room, finding Hyukkie’s jacket, tie, and the shirt that he was wearing last night scattered carelessly all over the floor. What. The. . Happened. Last. Night??! I sat on the edge of the bed and shook Hyukkie by his shoulder. He needed to wake up, he needed to tell me did we or did we not have last night.

“Hyukkie, wake the up, come on!”

He only groaned lazily at my desperate attempt to wake him up, not even opening his eyes.  

“Oh my god, Hyukkie! What the hell did I just tell you to do?!”

“Jagiyaaaa, stop yelling, pleaaaase.”

Hyukkie buried his head deeper into the pillow, clutching his head as he did so. What he said really just sounded like a muffled groan but I could easily catch the words. And normally I’d just turn into a puddle of love-sick mess whenever he called me that but judging on the adrenaline rush surging through me and how my heart was pounding like crazy, I didn’t think that’s what I would be.

“Oh no, don’t ‘honey’ me, wake up!”

“Aish, okay, okay jagiya, I’m up! Jeez, what crawled up your ?”

I subconsciously flinched when I heard Hyukkie said that. That was honestly the first time he said anything that was remotely close to being hostile to me ever since we got together. I didn’t know if I was being too sensitive or anything but… I didn’t think he was supposed to say that. I shook it off anyway since I figured he was just having a hangover as bad as the one I had. I knew he drank quite a lot last night too. So then Hyukkie sat up across me on the bed with his head in his hands, fingers through his brown hair, well it was safe to say that yeah, I guess he was nursing a hangover too.

“Look, I wanna know what happened last night.”

Hyukkie looked at me curiously, eyebrows furrowed together, as if he was seriously contemplating on what to answer. Oh god, please don’t tell me he out too.

“What do you mean what happened? Nothing happened.”

I wanted so much to believe him, and my gut feeling was also telling me that I should, but my curiosity had got the best of me. I had to know, I just had to. I couldn’t bear the thought of… me having while I was drunk. I didn’t want that, no. It would just be… too painful for me.

“Hyukkie, if nothing happened why am I awake only wearing your hoodie and my dress is over there by the couch and I have no ing memory that I had taken it off last night?! And look around, your clothes are pretty much all over the floor!”

I just completely freaked out, even though I knew I shouldn’t have since Hyukkie was pretty much in the dark as to why I suddenly I reacted this strongly. He quickly moved to sit beside me, concern painted all over his face.

“Jagiya, are you okay?”

“I would be okay if you tell me what EXACTLY happened last night.”

I hadn’t meant for my tone of voice to sound as harsh as it was when I exaggerated the word ‘exactly’ but I was just… scared. I was scared out of my mind at the thought of anything happening between me and Hyukkie when we were both wasted last night. And I guess Hyukkie caught the harshness in my voice and I immediately saw a hint of annoyance in his face, almost replacing the look of concern that was there before.

“Look, yes, we almost had last night but no, it didn’t actually happen, if that’s where you’re getting at. And I was the one who took off your dress last night cause I didn’t want you to sleep in it, it would be way too uncomfortable so I dressed you in my hoodie. There. That’s what happened last night.”

I let a sigh of relief when I heard him say that. I was safe, then. Nothing really happened.

“So that’s why you freaked out? Cause you thought we had ?”

“Well, yeah, is there any other reason why?”

Annoyance was now apparent on Hyukkie’s face. And now I was the one curious about it, about why he looked so annoyed at the fact that I freaked out cause I thought he and I had .

“Nothing, I just… I don’t know why you have to freak out that bad when it’s me we’re dealing with here, I’m your boyfriend. Would it be so wrong if we did have last night?”

  “Yes, it ing would! We were both drunk, you tell me what’s right about that!”

I had probably crossed a line when I said that, half-yelling at Hyukkie. But the way he was acting like it wouldn’t be a problem that we had when we were intoxicated like that just annoyed me beyond reason. And deep inside I knew he probably reacted that way cause he didn’t know… some things about me. But then I guess I was too late to take back anything I had said when Hyukkie stood up from the bed and walked towards the big glass window, hands curled up in a tight fist. That’s when I knew that he had gone beyond annoyed.

“Alice, if we did have last night it would be you as my girlfriend and me as your boyfriend. And we’ve been friends even long before that. The way I see it, it’s completely fine. Right now you’re making it as if I’m some sort of a ert who was gonna you, or something, when you know perfectly well I’m not like that.”

Hyukkie had called me by my name. Even though his tone of voice was still so composed, I should’ve taken that as the first signal that something would go completely wrong, but I overlooked that as I felt myself getting even more agitated at Hyukkie’s carelessness about the things that mattered so much for me.

“Yes, you are my boyfriend but does that give you the right to decide that it’s completely fine? Don’t you even think about how I would feel about it?!”

“I did! I did think about you, why do you think I stopped us from having last night when you were totally wasted and you were all over me, telling me you wanted me?! I could easily take advantage of you, I know you wouldn’t even remember anything about it the next morning, but I didn’t. I stopped because I respected you, because I cared about you, because I wasn’t sure if that was what you wanted. And now you’re treating me like I’m a -obsessed freak!”

“Oh so what do you want now, you want credit for it, you want me to thank you for your amazing ability to keep it in your pants? Something that you should have no problem in doing if you really care about me!”

At that point I had also stood up from the bed, looking at Hyukkie so angrily that I thought I couldn’t even see straight anymore. I didn’t know what had gotten into me. I could tell that he was getting angry too but was trying his best not to blow up again, from the way he was slowly letting his breath out.

“Look, we should stop this, you know where this is heading, right? We should stop, I just… don’t want something as trivial as to be the cause of us fighting like this. It’s just , we shouldn’t make a big deal out of it.”

Hyukkie’s tone of voice had softened down a lot, and I should’ve been happy about the fact that my boyfriend despised the idea of us fighting. But that’s not what I was feeling. A sharp pain suddenly jabbed at my heart when I heard what he had said. ‘It’s just ’. That right there had shown me that to him, was nothing special, that it almost didn’t mean anything. That’s what I was afraid of hearing. Cause I know that would hurt me the most. In the back of my mind I kept hearing this voice, saying over and over again, ‘he didn’t know, Alice, he didn’t know about your past, you shouldn’t blame him for it‘, but I was hurt so much that I couldn’t even make myself to listen to it.

“So… Hyukkie, if we… if we eventually have , it would just be something trivial, then? And I’m gonna be just as trivial.”

Hyukkie let out an exasperated sigh and I could tell he was well on his way of giving up on me. Why shouldn’t he? I knew I’ve always been a handful, I should be aware that one of these days he’s going to realize that and leave. I didn’t know if I was being rational or not when I think about those things. I guess fear and pain didn’t go very well together. I felt so worthless when I heard him say that. I hated how it made me feel exactly like I felt about ten years ago, just before I moved to the States, how hateful I was towards myself, how disgusted I was that I had let those things happened to me. And then suddenly I was being reminded of Nate, of all people, about what had happened to me these past few months, or even years, when it came to him. Those days where I had to bit back everything I wanted to say to him because I know I shouldn’t, the days where I had to pretend that I was okay when I know he was happy with his girlfriend and probably didn’t even think of me, when I would trade every thing that I have just so he can look at me the way he looked at his girlfriend. It was strange that those feelings were the ones most apparent when in fact I’m here with Hyukkie, my boyfriend, and dealing with things that were nothing like that. I hated it.

“Alice, that’s not what I said, stop putting words in my mouth.”

“But that’s what you’re trying to say, right? I could see it clearly. I’m just gonna be another name in your little black book, right? Just another notch on your bed post. I’m just gonna be another girl.”

“Alice, I don’t know what’s gotten into you but please, stop. You’re making this worse.”

“I’m the one making it worse, now?!”

I didn’t even realize I had yelled again, a lot of things were going through my mind at a million miles a second, and I couldn’t even stop to think that I had started acting like a stupid brat.

“Yes, you’re making it worse! I don’t know what your problem is, and I would be very happy to know why you suddenly turn me into the biggest jerk when all I had been trying to do was to get us out of this hole!”

“Maybe you’re the reason why we’re here at the first place, maybe you ARE the biggest jerk and you’ve just been pretending to be the good guy all along! If you had taken this seriously, if you just let me know that it bothered you as much as it bothered me, maybe I won’t be as angry as I am!! God, you probably never wanted me, you probably take me just as a charity cause because you pitied this poor little orphan girl! I just never meant much to you anyway, right?!”

As soon as I said that I knew I had gone too far. I could see the mixture of anger, disappointment and sadness all painted in Hyukkie’s adorable face. And I wanted to apologize right away, I wanted to just run into his arms and tell him to ignore everything I said cause I wasn’t being myself. It was too late, though.

“Or maybe you should try this, Alice, stop throwing every single one of your insecurities at me just to make yourself feel better, maybe you should stop leaning on me to make up for the things you couldn’t do!! Better yet, maybe you should just grow the up and stop taking me for granted!”

As Hyukkie turned around and left the room, slamming the door behind him, I instantly regretted everything. Why did I have to do that? Why didn’t I just let it go? Why didn’t I let him know why I was acting like this? And a million of other questions were running around in my head. But I know it was too late to even try and answer it. I had let Hyukkie down, I had pushed him to the point where he’s giving up on me. It’s all my fault. And as I felt a drop of tear fell from my eyes, I realized that I had probably made the biggest mistake of my life. But the worst was how his words probably stung more than anything.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*HEECHUL’S POV*

“Baby girl, you want anything from the room service? I’m ordering right now.”

Alice wasn’t answering. She just sat there beside me on the bed, hugging her knees and keeping her eyes fixed on the TV like it was the most fascinating thing in the world. Well, it’s not. Some corny cosmetic commercial was on and normally she would burst out laughing at how much camera effect was used on the model and then she’d say that the model probably looked like a clone of Harry Potter’s Bellatrix Lestrange if it weren’t for the ridiculous amount of make up. But she wasn’t even reacting at that. She’d been sitting on the same spot since almost an hour ago, sighing over and over again without so much as a smile or anything on her face. This wasn’t my baby girl at all.

“Baby girl…”

Still no reaction at all.

“Hey look, there’s a re-run of Saw I until IV!”

I can’t believe it, she still didn’t budge! I didn’t think it was this serious until the point that she wasn’t even interested in those gory movies she’s so crazy about.

“Oh, Hyukjae, you’re back.”

 At the mention of her boyfriend’s name, it was like someone snapped a finger during a hypnosis session and she was suddenly aware of her surroundings again. Her eyes looked around the room, no doubt in search of Hyukjae, not even realizing that the door wasn’t even opened and there was no way that Hyukjae could get in the room without none of us realizing it. Once it dawned on her that Hyukjae was still nowhere to be found, she glared coldly at me and said menacingly,

“I hate you, Kim Heechul.”

I could only laugh lightly and shook my head a little bit at Alice. She came to my room about two hours ago, looking so miserable and saying that she wanted to see Hyukjae cause she hadn’t talked to him for the whole day. That in itself was already really weird. I mean, everybody knows how lovey-dovey this couple could get and that they would most likely be within an arm’s length from each other. So when they suddenly avoided each other, being painfully awkward when Alice had to direct me and the guys, which of course included her boyfriend for a closing shot in today’s activity, it was easy to assume that something was up. Well, something did go down. She immediately spilled everything when I simply asked her, ‘what did you and the monkey boy do?’ the first second she stepped foot in my room.

“Why don’t you try and text him or something? See where he actually is.”

What little trace of resentment that she was holding against me when I tricked her earlier just evaporated when I asked her that and she only let out a sigh.

“I did. He only read it but… he didn’t reply.”

I hated how defeated she sounded when she said that. But then again, I couldn’t really fathom how she should feel after the huge fight she and Hyukjae just had because it involved something really sensitive about Alice that not all people knew about. Siwon knew about it, of course, and I found out just a few years ago. Even then, she made me swear not to tell a single soul about it. So of course Hyukjae didn’t have any idea about it, which I think what made this whole thing more complicated than it should be. Even though I would love to yell at both of them for over-reacting, I couldn’t really blame either one of them for reacting that way. Alice had her reasons, and Hyukjae knew nothing about it, hence him blowing up like he did.

“And you’re still planning on not telling him about everything? You know it’ll greatly decrease the chance of the two of you breaking up over this fight, right?”

Alice cringed as I mentioned the breaking up part, and I knew full well that that was the last thing she wanted to happen.

“I don’t know if he’s ready to find out. Or if I’m even ready to let him know.”

“Baby girl, he’s your boyfriend. And moreover, he’d been your friend for years before this. I don’t know about you but I think he deserved to know about this.”

“What does he deserve to know, oppa? That his girlfriend was bullied and ually harassed all the way through middle school? That she was even beaten up and was so close to being so that’s why she moved to the States and stayed cause she couldn’t feel intimate with every guy she used to be with? No, I don’t see that as a pleasant conversation at all.”  

I gotta admit, hearing her actually saying that never gets easy. I could almost feel my blood level spiked up again at the thought of those heartless people doing what they did to her. A lot of people probably didn’t know, but most of the time I wasn’t joking when I said nobody would ever get her laid while I was around or just when I was being her around-the-clock protective big brother. She had gone through so much and was probably even damaged on some levels, I just wanna make sure that she’s not damaged even further. As soon as she said that, her eyes already started watering, but she quickly rubbed them, refusing to cry. She ran her fingers through her short black hair and looked longingly at the door, as if she was sure that if she looked at it more often, Hyukjae would actually show up. But he didn’t.

“I gotta get some smoke.”

I rolled my eyes as Alice stood up from the bed and said that, reaching for the lighter and the pack of Marlboro Lights that she put on the nightstand earlier. She had brought it with her no doubt with every intention to smoke her lungs out when she came to my room but I had made it a point that as long as she didn’t want me to disown her as my baby sister she had better not smoke in front of me. I was amazed that the stubborn girl really did listen to me, I guess she was indeed on the verge of being depressed from this morning’s fight.

“That pack of cigarette isn’t gonna help anything. You know that, right?”

 “I know. I just need something to numb everything out even if it’s just for a little bit.”

A small pained smile appeared on her face as she said that and I half-thought to do what Donghae once did, snatching the pack of cigarette from her hand and proceed to demolish it cause I really didn’t think that was going to do her much good but I just couldn’t. She really looked like she needed a distraction, and if cigarette gave her that then I’ll just let her do whatever she wanted.

“You want me to come with you?”

“I wanna be alone for awhile, if you don’t mind.”

“Of course I don’t.”

I got up off the bed as well and pulled Alice into a hug. And it surprised me that as she held on to me, I could almost feel how frail she was. I guess this fight had affected her more than it should.

“You know you can get through this, right? Both you and Hyukjae? You should know that this is probably just the beginning and there are more fights coming soon, and if just this fight broke you two apart then you shouldn’t even be together at the first place.”

Alice brought her head up from resting on my shoulder and looked up at me, pouting with her eyebrows furrowed.

“I thought you were supposed to calm me down and tell me everything’s gonna be alright and all that ?”

I smiled at her innocent reaction, and her not so innocent choice of words, too. I know for a fact even though she’s had a few boyfriends before, Hyukjae was actually her first sort of serious one. She never actually talk about it but it was just so obvious that her ex boyfriends never really meant much to her and well… this was the first time I had seen her getting so depressed over a fight with her boyfriend. She probably just hadn’t realized how much Hyukjae meant to her.

“Keeping a relationship isn’t easy, baby girl. It’s gonna take a lot of work. And I’m not gonna go and sugarcoat everything for you, I’m gonna tell you exactly how it is, I don’t care.”

“Yeah, you and sugarcoating things don’t go very well together.”

“See? You know me.”

She rolled her eyes at me and smiled as she held on to me tighter for a little bit, before letting me go altogether.

“I’m going now, these babies are practically singing to me now, waiting to get lit up.”

It was my turn to roll my eyes as she said that and held up the pack of cigarette in her hands with a sly grin on her face. And just as she turned around and was about to walk towards the door, it had opened first, revealing a downcast-looking Hyukjae. He froze as soon as he saw Alice there and she was pretty much the same. Aish, these two! You could practically cut the tension between them with a knife and I wanted so bad to yell, ‘Yah! Are you just gonna stand there like fools? Kiss and make up!’ but then I realized I shouldn’t. It’s their damage to fix and I really shouldn’t meddle in it.

“Oppa, you left your phone in my room!”

Hyoyeon’s voice sounded so shrill and shocking when it broke through the tension that was building up in my room as she walked over to Hyukjae with his phone in her hand. Those two had a pretty close relationship, and even though she and the girls still sort of hated on Alice, they remain close friends and even Alice knew this. But I guess in this situation, when Alice spent the last hour trying to find Hyukjae and he refused to tell her where he was and suddenly she found out he’d been with Hyoyeon, it was so easy for her to get the wrong message and formed assumptions of her own. And as Alice stormed out of my room, without so much as looking at either Hyukjae or Hyoyeon, it was confirmed which assumptions she came up with.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

*SIWON’S POV*

I couldn’t quite count how many times I had been in this position, sitting all by myself thinking how things had gone from calm and easy into this tangled mess when I realized I was in love with Maddie. I had thought about this many times yet nothing seemed to come out as a clear answer for everything, and it’s even more depressing that it’s the only thing I could think about. Everything else seemed to matter less than this whole thing. That was why I was still awake at 2 in the morning, just laying there on my bed without any intention to go to sleep even though Tiffany had been asleep for a few hours now, beside me as always. I turned my head to look at her and I still couldn’t deny the fact that she’s a beauty and at one point or another I was pretty certain I had fallen hard for this girl, but lately something was just missing. And in between those emptiness came Maddie. She not only filled that emptiness, she overpowered it and basically took over everything. And I didn’t even know whether that emptiness had been there all along or if it was just my excuse for finally realizing I had also fallen in love with my best friend.

I decided to give up trying to go to sleep, I needed to get some fresh air. I got out of the room and just walked around aimlessly, before deciding that the outdoor pool should be an appropriate place for me to be alone with my thoughts. I mean, there wouldn’t be anyone there, right? Boy, was I wrong. As soon as I reached the exit door to the pool, I immediately saw a very familiar figure, sitting with her feet crossed in one of the sun decks, a pack of cigarette, lighter, and an ashtray sitting beside her as she smoked. Maddie looked a little depressed, and I was sure I didn’t like that at all. I knew something was up between her and Eunhyuk cause they’ve been acting weird around each other all day, and I kinda waited for her to tell me but she never did. That’s one of the things I missed about her nowadays, she never came to me for these things again. Maddie suddenly looked up and realized that I was there too. And I was just instantly drawn to her as she smiled at me, amazed at how her smile just seemed like it was enough to make everything better. I sat beside her on the sun deck as she put off her cigarette on the ashtray. Judging on how the ashtray was almost half full, I figured she had been out here for awhile.

“You know it’s bad to smoke, especially when you’re depressed, right?”

“If you’re only here to say that, you’re free to go.”

I squinted my eyes at her as she said that, trying to make sure whether or not she was being serious about it. But as she grinned cheekily after saying that, I knew she wasn’t.

“Ah, who am I kidding, I could never say that to you.”

I just smiled at what she said and pulled her closer to me as I put an arm around her waist. She obliged and inched closer to me before resting her head on my shoulder. And I knew in an instant that she was just about seconds away from telling me what had happened between her and Eunhyuk.

“Nate, Hyukkie and I nearly had last night.”

I knew it. I knew my gut feeling last night was right. But even so, it still couldn’t help the fact that my insides immediately burned when I heard her say that.

“And we were drunk and I… I couldn’t even remember what happened. And I was so scared that I let it happen to me again, I was scared that I could let my defenses down like that. And now we’re fighting and I said some things I didn’t mean, and I guess he did too and some of his words were so hurtful even though he probably didn’t realize it. He just… didn’t understand how scared I was, Nate.”

It broke my heart to hear that. And the things that happened ten years ago suddenly felt so fresh again. Those boys who beat Maddie up did more than just bully her and beat her up. That day when they had beat her up so bad that she had to be taken to the hospital, something more happened that day. Maybe it wasn’t enough for them to only beat her up, one of them had his older brother came with them and he… for Christ’s sakes, he nearly Maddie. It was pure luck that the school’s guard came just in time to prevent anything more from happening. I didn’t know what evil that possessed them to do that, and I couldn’t even begin to say how I was more than just furious when it happened. I was livid from the rage that took over me. Like what I had said before, that was probably the first time in my life where I was so close to killing anybody. And that was why I could totally understand Maddie’s seemingly incoherent mumbling.

“What do you mean you ‘let’ it happen to you again? It was never your fault, Maddie. Never.”

It was like she was back on square one, before all those therapy sessions she had to go through to at least let her have a chance at a normal life again. I guess there were some things that even those skilled therapists couldn’t fix.

“Maddie, look at me.”

She brought her head up from resting on my shoulder and looked at me with those beautiful blue eyes that I just realized had always captivated me.

“You’re precious, you mean so much to me, to everybody who loves you. And if Eunhyuk couldn’t see that then he doesn’t deserve you. If he couldn’t appreciate what he has when he has you, then he just doesn’t know what you’re worth.”

I knew that what I said was so personal on some levels that it almost seemed like I had been speaking for myself rather than for Maddie. I was selfish, I knew that. But I just couldn’t help it. I love this girl and it tortured me so much that she didn’t know that. She was looking at me with surprise etched all over her face and I half-thought she caught the meaning behind what I said, but the next moment the surprised look was replaced by acceptance and followed by a knowing smile, I knew that in her thoughts, I was still the best friend who just happened to be overly protective of her.

“You’re still having doubts about him, aren’t you?”

Oh god, Maddie, how I wanted so bad to scream that I don’t have doubts about Eunhyuk whatsoever, I knew that he was now probably madly in love with you but I was just the one who couldn’t accept that. But instead, I just returned her smile and pulled her closer into my arms and planted a kiss on her forehead.

“I guess I am. Is it so wrong that I’m just this protective over you?”

“No, it’s not. If anything, it always makes me feel safe, loved.”

“Well, I do love you.”

It just slipped out of my mouth without me even planning on saying that, no matter how true those words were.

“And I love you too, Nate. It’s like what you once said to me, you’re the world’s most awesome best friend a girl could ask for.”

There it was again, the word ‘best friend’. I never thought there would come a day where I would hate it so much when it came from Maddie. But I guess that day had come, and it was now. Even though she said she loved me too, I knew on what level it was, obviously not on the same level as I was when I said I loved her. And I couldn’t do anything but to hold her even closer to me, if that was even physically possible. She was already practically sitting on my lap as I had my arms securely around her. I kissed her cheek, letting my lips linger over it for a few moments longer than normal and I prayed to God that she noticed what I was trying to do.

“Just promise me that you’ll know when enough is enough when it came to Eunhyuk, okay?”

“I promise. Though I don’t think there would be something like that. I was so mad when I came here, Nate. I was mad at Hyukkie. Then I thought about it more and… he most likely did what he did cause he didn’t know about me completely. I… wanna tell him all about it, I really think Hyukkie’s worth it, Nate.”

I guess she didn’t notice.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So... Um... *looks around nervously* Yeah, I know it's been so long since I last updated and I really have no other reason than I was busy with work and school and it really put a damper on my writing too. But Alice is back and I hope you still love her. :D Thanks to everybody who left me messages saying you couldn't wait for an update. Well, that really put a fire under my and I finally came up with an update. I will shut up now. Hope you enjoy this one! Love you all. :*