Today is the day.

          I jumped out of bed and hit my alarm clock to stop that annoying beeping sound. It was going on 7am, just another hour before I had to leave. I walked over to the window and pushed open the curtains. Allowing the bright sunlight to make its way into my room. When the sun hit my skin I felt a small smile creep onto my face, it felt so warm.

          My cell phone began to ring causing me to look away from the beautiful sky. I walked over to my night stand and looked at the caller ID. Another smile played on my lips.

          "Hello?"

          "AHH! I'm glad you are awake! I was afraid you'd still be asleep!"

          "Yah! Today is a big day why would I sleep in!" I said as I walked out of my room and into the bathroom. My hair was messed up to the max as I saw it in the mirror.

          "Aish, I know you love to sleep _____-ah."

          "You know me so well Jinki." I heard a huff coming from the other line. A laugh left my lips as I heard Jinki sighing on the other line.

          "I'm you're Oppa! O.P.P.A. Come on say it with me Oppa!"

          "Jinki."

          "Why are you so against saying Oppa?"

          It's true I am sort of against it. I just find it annoying sometimes, when I hear someone say 'Oppa' I think of some high pitched girl jumping up and down with pig tails. I never want to use the word Oppa in my life, no matter what.

          "I just don't like it." I leaned up against the sink with my back towards the mirror. I couldn't look at myself anymore. Jinki sighed in my ear again making another smile appear.

          "You're so weird _____-ah"

          I scuffed, "You should be use to it by now. We've been friends since first grade."

          "You never even called me Oppa back then. Can you say it for me once please~?"

          "O~ Oh, I got to go." I laughed. I can see the smirk and fake anger on Jinki's face as we speak.

          "YAH!"

          "Bye!" I clicked the end call button and held the phone to my lower lip.

          I walked down the street on Seoul allowing time to go by slowly. Right now I was in no rush to make it to my destination. I wanted to kill as much time as I can. As I walked down the sidewalk, my eyes were looking down at my feet. My toes were painted a light pink, just the right color. This is the only shade of pink I will ever allow in my life, weird isn't it?

          The wind pushed back long dark brown hair. I felt like I was in one of those dramas where the girl walks alone and slowly in town waiting for someone to come and find her. The person would be standing at the end of side walk holding a bunch of flowers. Sadly, there was no one waiting for me with flowers. Unless you count the old man that is selling bags of potatoes. He could be waiting for me.

          "I'll give you a bag for $2!"

          Told you he was waiting for me.

          "You're late." That stern voice would normal make my skin crawl but today it didn't. I looked up and came face to face with the person talking to me. They had a big smile on their face as they tried to be mad, it didn't work.

          I threw up my hands, "I'm sorry Sun-Young. They took forever trying to find the dresses. I thought they lost it for a second."

          Sun-Young pouted, "You do have it right?"

          I smiled and placed the dress in front of her. She gave out a sequel and grabbed it out of my hands. Sun-Young ran to the big mirror in her bedroom and pulled out the dress. Her eyes double in size of excitement as she held it up to her body.

          "It's so beautiful!"

          I hummed in agreement as I placed my dress on her pink bed and looked at her. She looked so happy as she held the dress close to her body when she spun around with it. I couldn't help but laugh at her action, she is cute.

          "_____-ah, do you think it will all go well?"

          I walked behind her and placed both my hands on her shoulders. She looked at me through the mirror waiting for my answer. A simple smile was all I had to give for her to understand. Sun-Young placed the dress on her dresser right next to her and wrapped her arms around my neck. I was surprised at the sudden action but I just hugged back.

          "Thank you for helping." She whispered into my ear.

          All I could really do was nod. The words got caught in my throat, I wasn't that good when it came to mushy stuff like this. It was best if I kept my mouth shut and just let everything play out. When she pulled away I stuffed my hands in my pockets and watched her move around her room.

          There was a knock at the door making me turn my head. Sun-Young heard it as well, "_____-ah can you get that?"

          I turned my attention back to Sun-Young. Well more like to her , she was bent down in the closet trying to find something. I gave another hum and walked out of the room. When I made it to the front door I placed my hands on the knob and took in a deep breath.

          The light blinded my eyes as I opened the door. At first I couldn't see anything, damn that sun. But, I felt something wrapped around my stomach while hosting me into the air. I gave out a laugh and let myself being held into the air.

          "_____-ah! I missed you!" Amber shouted.

          She bear is my best friend, well best girl friend. Whenever I need her she is always right there. Also, I think we became so close when we found out that we weren't really like the other girls. More tomboy than running around in skirts. I'll never forget the day we met. It didn't start off good, we actually started fighting about something, I can't remember. But, in the end we high-five and laughed off.

          "I missed you too Boo!" My nickname for her. She is my boo.

          "Hi _____-ah!" I heard other people behind Boo.

          It was Song Qian, Choi Jinri, and Krystal. I smiled at all of them as they made their way into Sun-Young's room. They all had dressed in their hands, I think one of them was holding Amber's. Yes me and her are both wearing dresses, it's going to go down in history.

          My boo let me down. I fixed my clothes and began to walk back into the other room with the girls. But, Amber grabbed my wrist preventing me from walking away. I looked down at our hands and made my way back up to her. She had a concerned look all over her face.

          "Are you ok?" She asked.

          I hummed and put on a smile, "I'm fine."

          "Are you sure?"

          "Yes," I felt her let go of me. I took the chance and walked into the bedroom.

          Each of them were looking at Sun-Young's dress, all of them in awe. When I entered the room each girl besides Sun-Young ran over to me. They all grabbed onto my shoulders and shook her around. I couldn't help but laugh.

          "Did you really pick out that dress?" They all screamed.

          I nodded, "Yes. I do have a sense of style and beauty you know."

          They all laughed. When they let go of me to go back to the dress, I felt someone wrap their arms around my neck. I turned my head to the side and saw Boo looking right at the dress.

          "It's really beautiful." She whispered.

          I hummed and folded my arms in front of me. My eyes looked at the bright white dress, it really was beautiful.

"It's for the beautiful bride."

 

---

         

         In my knee high light pink dress I walked around the empty altar. My heart swelled in my chest as I stood near the back and looked out at the beautiful outside scenery in front of me. It was breath taking, I also helped with this. There had to be pink and I knew just what to do.

          My now styled hair was flowing in the warm wind. There were Carmel highlights going down my hair to add a little pop. There was shiver hair beads in my hair, they sort of looked they were just glued on, giving off the sense of innocence. My light curls pushed back reveling my milk white neck. I wore a simple silver necklace that shined in the sun. Around my wrist were silver bands. And, to finish it off, I wore white high heels that made me a little bit taller.

          I took a slow step forward down the alley taking in the scene. White chairs filled the grass with light pink bows going along them. At the end, the wedding arbor. It was wrapped in daises with crystals hanging from it. It made me speechless just looking at it.

          I found myself stand under the magnificent arbor. My back was toward all the seats. Looking out at the sky I felt happy. It's everything that I always wanted.

          " Perfect." I whispered.

          "_____-ah?" I jumped at my name.

          Slowly I turned around and came face to face with a well dressed Jinki. He was in a black suit with a white cuffed shirt showing. Jinki had a corsage pinned on his right side. It was light pink, going along with the theme. My heart stopped as I looked up in his eyes.

          "Hi," I said through a heavy breath. I turned my attention back to the scenery trying to focus on something else. Jinki took a step forward, he was so close to me that I felt his heat hitting my back.  I closed my eyes as I felt his arms wrap around me.

          "Thank you," He said as he kissed my cheek.

          I hummed and opened my eyes to look at the sky. It was bright blue with a few clouds in the sky.

          "You looked really beautiful. I don't think I've ever seen you in a dress." He said with a laugh.

          I hummed again. The words didn't leave my throat, it hurt too much.

          I could feel his eyes looking down at me. I took in a breath, "I'm just so happy for you Jinki! Come on today is your day!"

          I jumped around and gave him one of my best smiles, "I should go check on Sun-Young."

          Jinki smiled and nodded down at me.

 

---

         

          20 more minutes.

          Sun-Young stood near the mirror and looked at her self. She had her light brown hair tighter up with a veal around her back. A bright and fluffy white dress reached down to her mid thigh. On her left arm she wore a beaded white bracelet that went well with her skin. A Boca of white fragile flowers in her hands.

          "How are you feeling?" I asked.

          She turned around with a bright smile, "Like the luckiest girl in the world."

          Her and I both laughed. I made my way over to her and smiled, "Today is your day girl."

          There was a knock at the door. All the bridesmaids came into the room.

          "It's time." Krystal said with a smile.

          Sun-Young took one last look in the mirror and smiled, "Let's go."

          Everyone walked out of the room. I took a look at myself and smiled. I saw my boo walk into the room and handed me a little flower Boca. My hands gripped onto it and I smiled.

          "You ready?" She asked.

          I nodded and we made our way out.

---

         

           All the bridesmaids walked down the alter with our flowers in front of us. As I walking down it felt like everything stopped inside me. My eyes looked at every who watched us come down. They all had smiles on their faces as they watched. I looked down at my feet but soon lifter my head up and smiled back.

          When we reached the end I found myself looking at Jinki who stood there with a smile on his face. He looked so handsome today that it would make anyone's heart stop. His grooms men where Kim Jonghyun, Kim Kibum, Choi Minho, and Lee Taemin. They all looked just as stunning in their suits. Amber reached out and touched my bear shoulder. I threw away my thoughts and began to walk towards the left side of the alter.

          Amber smiled over at me and I smiled back.

          Here comes the bride began to play and everyone got up on their feet. I stood there and looked over all the heads. Everyone gasped at Sun-Young as she came out in her stunning white dress. She had a smile on her face as he looked towards her father.

          They both took slowly steps down the alter. Sun-Young's eyes were glued onto Jinki's as she slowly made their way down. My hands began to sweat as I watched her walk down the alley. It took to slow. I let one of my hands fall to my side as I watched her inch closer to my lifelong friend.

          I felt something grab a hold of my hand. I looked over at Amber who just smiled. I gripped her hand tighter as Sun-Young kissed her father before he took his seat. Slowly, she walked up to her soon to be husband and stood right to her.

          "We are gathered together for the joining of a new family in an ancient tradition. God performed the very first wedding ceremony in the Garden of Eden." The minister said as he read out of a bible.

          I felt my heart clenching as I watched Jinki look at Sun-Young. I saw that love in his eyes. He really loved her. That love I'll never have, only that sister love.

          I loved you Lee Jinki since the day I moved to Korea. I felt so alone but when you came over the day I moved it everything seemed so right. The world was a million times more brighter when he said hello to me. You taught me so much that I can't even thank you enough.

          Jinki I don't know when I feel in love with you but I don't regret it. I stood by your side in school when you were with all your girlfriends. Not once did I leave your side, I just couldn't. I helped you healed your broken hearts when you broke up with your girlfriend. I whipped away your tears when you hurt yourself.

"Marriage is considered the pinnacle of human relationships, embodying a unique kind of intimacy, and love and is a metaphor for the deep love between Christ and the Church."

          I just wish you could see that I love you more than just a friend. I just wish you would run to me when you realized how much I love you. When you came to me telling that you found the girl of your dreams, I died inside. I no longer smiled, laughed, or said a word. Everything felt horrible. I could only find myself humming to whatever was going on.

          There was times when you asked what was wrong but I just smiled and brushed it off. You never asked again. I thought maybe you didn't care anymore so I became numb. Whenever we would hang out I would find myself just sitting there. Everything broke apart inside me. My heart was pumping anymore, my mind was blank, my emotions were dead. I was numb. I thought it would go away in time but they never did.

          "Therefore if any man can show any just cause why they may not lawfully be joined together, let him now speak, or else hereafter for ever hold his peace."

          When you came to me saying that you were going to propose to Sun-Young I broke down. I just smiled and said that was a great Idea. When you ran to go tell your friends I ran all the way home and cried my eyes out. Every picture that we had of each other from when we were little to when we were older, shattered that night. I threw each picture against the wall. I screamed in pain as nothing fixed my broken heart.

          That night, I wanted it all to end. All the tears. All the pain. I didn't want to feel it anymore. So, I tried to end it. I took a piece of glass and sliced my wrist, but the pain was still there. I sliced it against and fell down to my knees. I felt the glass sticking into my skin. But, I didn't mind, no, I didn't care. The pain in my heart hurt way more than the glass.

          I don't know if you know but Amber found me that night. She said that once she heard that you were marrying Sun-Young, my boo ran all the way to me. I begged her not to tell you about what I did. I honestly think she didn't tell but you know Amber.  

          "I now pronounce you husband and wife. Lee Jinki you may kiss the bride."

          I turned too Amber with tears in my eyes. My boo looked right at me and reached out. Before she could say anything I let go of her hand. Nothing felt right. She looked at me with fearful eyes and tried to grab my hand again.

          "I can't do this," I whispered to her.

          Before she could say anything I threw the flower Boca on the grassy ground. I ripped off my heals and pulled the beads in my hair. I felt the eyes on me as I preformed my actions. I took one last look towards Jinki and saw him with his mouth wide open. In fact everyone was looking at me that way.

          I finally let the tears fall from my bloodshot eyes. I began to walk away but I felt Amber's hand on my shoulder. She didn't want me to go, but I need to. I can't stay here and watch this anymore. I don't need any more pain than I do. I shoved my boo off my shoulder and walked down the alter as everyone looked at me.

          My make up was swearing all down my face but I didn't care. I threw the hair beads somewhere behind me and broke out into a run. It's better to erase you Jinki, It's better to erase all of you.

---

         

          Hours passed since the wedding. I knew it had to be over by now. I didn't have my phone or anything on me. I walked down the street in my dress with makeup smeared down my face. I didn't care about the eyes looking right me, nothing matter.

          When I finally came to apartment. I walked right up and shut the door behind me. I went into the bathroom and washed off all the foul make up and literally ripped off the dress. When I heard the fabric ripping I felt my heart sort of feel better, until I heard the phone ring. It was my land line. It had to be one of them so I didn't answer.

          I went into my room and pulled on a sweater and sweat pants. I put them on and pulled out a duffle bag. As I began to pack I felt the tears falling from my eyes again. I didn't have much clothes since I wore the same thing a lot. Once I finished I scribbled a note and left taped to my bedroom down. I knew Amber was going to come around.

          I took one last look at the apartment and cried. I heard the phone ringing again. I went over to it and picked it up.

          "HELLO?! _____-AH!" It was Jinki.

          No words left my mouth.

          "_____-AH! Say something please I know that you are there."

          Still nothing.

          "_____-ah, tell me what's wrong. I'm so worried."

          I felt more tears leaving my eyes. I took in a breath and had my finger hovering over the big button that hung up the call. Jinki began to talk again but I couldn't make it out. I noticed that he was talking to someone. Just then I heard Sun-Young's voice and I lost it.

          "Goodbye Oppa." I pressed the button.

          A long beep played in my ear. I placed the phone on the table still having the long beep playing so no one could call. I picked up my duffle bag and swung it over my shoulder.

          This really is Goodbye.